Alessandra

by Ann M Pratley

  Edward watched his mother during this time, aware of the bittersweet contrast of the two things that could happen in one day - one life extinguished as another began. During the funeral service she clung to him, as much emotionally as physically, and Alessandra held back in everything, ensuring her husband did not feel divided.

  Of comfort to her mother-in-law seemed to be Alessandra's father also, who had not too long since lost his own lifelong love. Alessandra would see them huddled together in different places - the drawing room, the gardens, and even her favourite spot - the glass jungle room.

  * * * * *

  "The estate is now yours, Edward, to command as you wish, but I do advise that you consider things carefully before making any changes. Do not rush in. Take your time and assess what really needs to be done, and what can be put off. This is a full time job and it will take much out of you if you let it. Don't let it take you from your family too much - it can be lonely as a wife to the master of a great estate like this one, if you don't work together to manage everything so it all works well," Edward heard his mother say, and he turned to look at her.

  They were sitting in the drawing room alone, Alessandra and her father having gone out for what was now a routine of a daily walk through the gardens together in the late afternoon sun.

  "Did you feel like that, Mother? Lonely?" he asked, not sure if he would cause offence, but curious after her choice of wording. Four years earlier he would not have dared be so intrusive into her private life, but since his marriage - and particularly since his father's passing - the two of them seemed to have moved forward as adult companions, as much as mother and son.

  She looked at her grown son and recognised once more how much he had grown, and what a fine man he was developing into. And already a father to three children, all of whom appeared healthy.

  Edward saw his mother smile sadly and nod after a period of time, during which he considered she might be letting memories flow over her.

  "Sometimes I did, when things were going on that your father would have to deal with, and he would be gone from breakfast until bedtime. Yes, at different times it did seem like a lonely life, but those times were far outweighed by the many, many more where he was here," she said and paused before continuing. "You appear to have a full, loving marriage, Edward. Just monitor how you are both feeling, as you start to get busier. I know Alessandra is very strong, and she will do fine to run the household, no doubt whilst continuing to be the loving mother that she is, but don't let the busyness of the two of you result in space between you."

  Edward considered what was said to him and nodded, lowering his eyes as he pondered the advice. Already he had started to feel pressure on him as he took on the many roles that his father had played before him. But things that had not become affected yet were the evening routine of he and Alessandra spending time with the children, and both of them putting them down to sleep for the night, and afterwards the two of them retiring to their bed chamber to talk together about their day before going to sleep. Since the birth of Charles, neither of them had made any move toward physical intimacy, there suddenly having been just so much to always do that sleep was a priority. And he knew that with his wife breastfeeding their son several times a day, while running the household largely on her own now that his mother had taken a back seat there, Alessandra was as exhausted as he was when they came together in the evenings.

  Thinking about his family he felt a sudden desire to be around his children, so stood up.

  "Would you like to come to the nursery, Mother? I feel the need to give my children a hug," he said and immediately saw her smile and stand up with a sense of energy about her.

  "I shall like that very much, Edward. Yesterday when I was playing with little Elizabeth she…" Edward's mother began and was soon making him laugh as she told a small story about one of Elizabeth's increasing adventures in exploration of her surroundings.

  * * * * *

  A month later, Edward and Alessandra found themselves settled into a routine that was busy but not stressful. Edward spent much of the day around the estate, visiting tenants and discussing different aspects of agriculture with them, and after several weeks of the routine, started to finally find it easier to not see his wife at all between breakfast and the evening meal.

  Alessandra similarly resolved to put her head down and treat the work like a job, doing everything she could between breakfast and their evening meal together, whilst making time each day to feed the baby and spend time with Isabella and Elizabeth, and enjoying an afternoon stroll with her father.

  "You are always so busy, Daughter," her father said to her one day on their daily walk. "If you need help with something, I can help, do not forget."

  "Father! No, you do not need do anything while here except relax and enjoy yourself," she said, horrified at the thought of her father taking on any of their work.

  He stopped walking and turned to her.

  "Alessandra, I have worked all my life, in one way or another. It is difficult sometimes to not have anything I am required to do. Please - if you or Edward need assistance with anything, promise me you will let me know, so I can help."

  She looked closely at him, noticing suddenly how much he had aged since her mother's death, and conceded that perhaps it was difficult for him to not have any vocation any more.

  "Thank you, Father. I certainly shall ask for your help when I need to, and I will talk to Edward and ensure he does also."

  Chapter Sixty Nine

  As the four month anniversary of his father's death passed, Edward found himself starting to feel very lonely. He knew his wife was there for him, and yet he could not bring himself to bother her with his desire for her, so kept quiet and focused on simply holding her each night.

  As always in the evenings, he and Alessandra put the children down to sleep after extensive time hugging each of them, and then moved to the privacy of their own room.

  On this evening, he sensed something about his wife was different, as if she had something seriously on her mind. He put his arms around her and held her in front of the fire before taking her hand and leading her to the sofa, where they reclined back and held hands, sitting close.

  "What is it, Alessandra?" he asked gently, finding a surge of panic inside of him.

  She looked at him as if only just realising he was there.

  "Oh, it is nothing, Edward. My milk has dried up much sooner than it did with Isabella and Elizabeth, that is all. Margaret has already weaned him onto cow milk," she said and put the matter out of her mind, determined as he was to not talk about trivial things when he was obviously so exhausted at the end of each day. "Sorry, tell me how your day was. Did you sort out…" she continued, encouraging him to speak about his tasks of the day.

  * * * * *

  The next morning, after breakfast, Alessandra also found herself feeling withdrawn and alone, missing her husband. She tried to formulate some kind of plan to have some real time alone with him, but initially thought the idea might be impossible. Until she considered her father's offer the day before.

  Midway through the day she entered the drawing room and found her father in pleasant conversation with Edward's mother, and decided to be bold and approach the both of them for help.

  "I wish to ask both of you for assistance with a matter," she started, feeling a slight blush on her face beginning, but determined to see the requires through.

  "Of course Alessandra, how can we help?" her father asked, jumping up quickly, as if it were an emergency.

  "Oh Father, it is not something that requires immediate attention, but…" she started, now feeling very awkward before she found her resolve once more. "I would like - if the two of you would not mind - to go away to Bath with Edward for a short time. I…" she continued, now feeling the full force of her 'beetroot face', as she had come to refer to it over the years.

  She saw her father look at Edward's mother knowingly, as if the two of them had already discussed such a
plan, and then he looked back at her.

  "Alessandra, that is a wonderful idea."

  "Yes, go tomorrow, Alessandra, with our blessing. Do not worry, the estate will be fine in the hands of myself and your father. You and Edward have been working so hard that you deserve it."

  Alessandra could not hold back from smiling broadly and moving in to give each of them a hug.

  "Thank you!" she exclaimed excitedly, making them both laugh. "I shall sort things out now." She turned back to them with a sly grin on her face. "Could we perhaps keep this a secret until breakfast tomorrow?" she asked and they both nodded, smiling.

  * * * * *

  That night in bed Edward felt as if his wife was keeping something from him, but he did not want to pressure her, given all that she was dealing with, so once again went to sleep feeling content to be with her, but at the same time feeling a slight sense of loneliness, like he was losing her.

  * * * * *

  In the morning they breakfasted and when Edward stood up to excuse himself he found himself commanded by his wife, unexpectedly.

  "Sit down, Edward … please."

  He did so, looking at all of the faces at the table and realising that something was going on that he had not been made party to.

  "You shall not be going to work around the estate today," she continued, pretending to be stern in her voice. "I have quite another job for you to do."

  Edward looked at his wife, ready to comply with whatever she needed assistance with, but when he really looked into her eyes he saw something he had not seen in a long while.

  "What can I help you with, my lovely wife?" he asked, sensing she was somehow teasing him in her mock seriousness.

  "You can help me with packing enough clothing for you and me, for two nights."

  Edward sensed his mother and Alessandra's father both looking at him, and turning his attention away from his wife he saw how much they were both smiling, and then, seeing his confusion, all three people before him started laughing quietly.

  "What have I not been told?" he asked in good humour.

  "You shall go with your wife, Edward, and enjoy two nights in Bath with her. Do not worry about the estate, we shall look after it and we are quite qualified to handle anything out of the ordinary, should it happen," he heard his mother say, smiling broadly at him. "Your children are in good hands, and the estate is in good hands. Do not argue. Just do as your wife bids."

  Alessandra watched her husband's face change through different emotions as he looked at each person in the room, and when he settled his eyes on hers, she saw he was inwardly pleased, which in turn pleased her.

  "Go!" Alessandra's father insisted. "You are young and you are in love. Do not waste a moment."

  * * * * *

  Upstairs in their bed chamber the door was closed behind them and Edward found himself shy, for the first time since their wedding night. Sensing it, Alessandra moved to him, put her arms around him, and kissed him deeply.

  "Husband, let us go and say goodbye to our children, and then be off," she said to him, making him instantly aroused and hard, just by the look in her eyes, and he blushed and smiled at her.

  "I cannot go to the nursery right in this moment, Alessandra," he said, making her giggle for the first time in months, and he remembered what a wonderful sound it was to him - and how much he had missed it.

  Chapter Seventy

  Shyly the two of them entered their rooms in their Bath accommodation. When the door was closed behind them they took a moment to look around their suite, with its small lounge and dining area, and bedroom beyond.

  Edward still felt shy but was so heated he could hardly think, and when he looked at his wife he found deep inside him a level of eagerness he had not quite felt before. Once more she approached him, put her arms around him, and kissed him, not holding back on the level of desire she felt.

  Melting against her, Edward finally found his confidence, and took his time undressing her, indulging in seeing every small piece of her skin as it became visible. As he did so, she teased him, using her hand to reach out and brush against him, knowing he was already very hard and ready. The sensations increased until he felt like he might not be able to hold back any more from climaxing, and he held her hand still.

  "Alessandra, it has been so long, I am already on fire. Please…" he started to say and removed the last item from her body, before feeling her start to undress him, and it was not soon enough that they stood naked. He gently pushed her backward into the bedroom and positioned her on her back on the bed, taking time to look down on her and take in the beautiful sight before him, before joining her.

  Alessandra put out her arms to him and welcomed him, her own arousal well advanced also. She kissed him over and over, enjoying the sensations that had been missing since before their last child had been born. Every part of her body felt like it was longing for him, and she revelled in feeling him start to kiss her everywhere. When he reached her core, his tongue moving on her, she exploded in orgasm quickly, surprising both of them, and then making her giggle.

  Edward slid up her body and kissed her again, now feeling like he desperately needed to find relief. He looked into her eyes to silently ask what she wanted and immediately felt her hands on his hips, pulling him closer so he could sink into her. Alternating closing his eyes to kiss her, with looking down into her face, he felt the familiar warmth engulf him and immediately shuddered inside of her.

  He lay like that for some time, enjoying the sensations flowing through him, and when he opened his eyes he saw her smiling at him. She reached out her hand and stroked his face, alternating this with kissing him briefly on the lips, over and over.

  "You are right, Edward. It has been too long … and I have missed you too much."

  Edward felt his heart sing. In recent months the feeling of loneliness had started to creep in, even though he had tried to keep it at bay.

  "I have missed you too, Alessandra. Always I want you," Edward responded. "I never stop wanting you."

  She smiled at him further. "I know. Nor I you."

  He pulled out of her and lay beside her, pulling the covers over the two of them, and pulling her tightly against him as they lay on their sides, looking at one another.

  "Thank you, for arranging this," he said to her, feeling shy once again. "I did not want to rush you after the birth."

  "I know, and I thank you for always being so considerate toward me, Edward. We have both become so busy, but we must not let that stop us from being close like this. I don't want it to stop. I love you too much."

  Edward was overwhelmed in emotion all of a sudden, and felt a tear come to his eye, before he leaned in and kissed her again, and they indulged in a period of much, much slower lovemaking.

  * * * * *

  Lying back on the bed, both finally feeling sated, Edward laughed.

  "Oh my wife, what you do to me!" he said, bringing his arm up and covering his eyes as he lay on his back, making her giggle again - a sound he loved so much. "I … we … must rest!"

  Alessandra looked at her husband, pleased to see him so happy once again after a period of time where everything had seemed so very serious, with all that had happened. For these 48 hours she did not want him to ponder about the sadness that had occurred, or give thought to any worries around the estate. She just wanted to scoop him up and hold him close, and reassure him that everything was alright.

  Edward pulled his arm down, away from his eyes, and turned to her, still in awe of her as a wife, even with having been married almost four years. Suddenly he was thinking about the possibility of having made another child, and then he found himself thinking about her hardship with the birth of their son … and Alessandra saw his face change.

  "What?" she asked, knowing something was weighing on his mind all of a sudden.

  "I can't bear the thought of losing you," he said simply, making her heart swell.

  "Why are you thinking about that now, Edward? This is a happy
time."

  He considered not telling her his concerns, but fought his indecision about it and spoke.

  "The last birth was taxing on your body, I think," he said quietly, looking away.

  "Edward, during any birth I could leave this world - but on any day I could leave this world, as could you. Do not let us think too heavily about it. We just need to make the most of the time that we do have together."

  "But, do you particularly want to be with child again?"

  Alessandra took time to think about that.

  "I am happy with the three that we have, and I will be happy if we have more. I would rather put it in nature's hands if we are meant to keep having children or not. But if you wish for us not to join anymore…"

  "I have always been happy having this time with you, even if we do not join," he said and his mind wandered to the specifics of procreation.

  As if reading his mind, Alessandra spoke. "What if we tried joining without making a child, Edward?"

  "Yes," he replied simply, that very possibility having just entered his mind.

  They turned on their sides toward one another, with thoughtful looks on their faces.

  "The baby making aspect is your … juice, is it not?" she asked and he smiled at her terminology, and nodded. "What if you stopped that from being in me?" she continued, and Edward could see the difficulty on her face, as it became redder and redder before him. "If you … pulled out of me … before…"

  Edward sensed what she was saying and considered teasing her about her 'beetroot face', as he had heard her call her current discomfort before, but let it go, not wanting to make her in any way uncomfortable.