Exposed (Free Falling)

by Raven St. Pierre

  Jason did a quick estimated headcount. “How many of these people are actually in the wedding?” He asked.

  Terrell thought it over in his head. “Twelve on each side, so twenty-four, but friends and family were welcome to come today too. I guess the mention of ‘free food’ got everybody’s attention.”

  They shared a laugh and I tore my eyes away from AJ. Terrell excused himself and left Jason and me standing there. I looked everywhere but the direction where I knew a pair of eyes remained trained on me.

  “I think I’m gonna grab something to drink. You want me to bring you a glass?” Jason asked.

  I nodded with a smile as he made his way over to the bar. “Thanks. Something strong, please.”

  He shot me a look and then walked away. I felt awkward and nervous, but I held it together. While I waited, I didn’t wander far, but there were a few cheap paintings on the walls that I decided to check out. They were the usual still-life replicas that can be found in thousands of hotels across the continent, but today, they gave me an excuse to turn my back on the room and catch my breath.

  The sound of high heels approaching from behind made my posture stiffen.

  “Aren’t these things nasty?” An unfamiliar voice asked.

  I tilted my chin to the left and a breath hitched in my throat when I saw AJ’s fiancé standing beside me. To conceal the fact that she startled me, I gave a polite smile and nod. “Yeah…they’re pretty disgusting.”

  She laughed easily and then went right into an introduction. “I’m Kira.”

  I hesitated, but shook her hand when she extended it. “Sam.”

  Judging by the knowing expression on her face, I knew that I’d guessed right; she did know who I was. “Nice to meet you.”

  Again, I only smiled.

  Kira placed the hand not currently cradling her glass of wine on her hip. She stared at the pictures and didn’t make eye contact when she spoke. “I just want you to know that there doesn’t have to be any weirdness or anything between us just because…well…you know.”

  I drew in a deep breath and continued to evaluate the hideous green vase of flowers in the print. “I’ll take that,” I replied.

  Kira nodded in my peripheral. “AJ didn’t want me to come over here and say anything, but I thought it’d be best to clear the air. With the wedding tomorrow and everything, it just seemed like the mature thing to do.” She let out a nervous laugh.

  I glanced over at her when I felt her staring. She looked me up and down a little like any woman would, smiling shyly when she realized I’d noticed.

  We were plunged into awkward silence and I found myself wondering where AJ was during my and Kira’s conversation. How much had he told her about me? About us?

  “Well, at any rate, it was nice finally meeting you,” she said with a heavy sigh, only now letting on that this was difficult for her. She reached out her hand to shake mine, and when I returned the gesture, her eyes zeroed in on her man’s name tatted on my wrist and mine went to the huge rock she was sporting on her ring finger. I withdrew from her grasp quicker than seemed natural and she cleared her throat, both of us feeling equally uncomfortable for different reasons.

  “Guess I’ll see you later,” she concluded, finally deciding to walk away to end both our suffering.

  When she was gone, Jason returned with whatever he’d ordered me. I didn’t even bother asking as I downed it in one swallow. It burned my throat and chest which meant he did as I asked and got me something with some kick to it.

  “You good?”

  I nodded and touched the back of my hand to my lips lightly.

  “Take it easy; it’s still early, Babe,” Jason suggested.

  I heard him, but he had no clue how my insides had just flipped upside down with that one conversation.

  “Wanna walk around and –“

  “Actually, I’m not feeling so well. I’m going back up to the room.”

  A look of concern crossed his face, but he didn’t hesitate to follow me as I made my way toward the doors of the banquet hall, headed back out toward the lobby. As I passed the blur of faces, one in particular stood out and I couldn’t make myself look away. AJ watched me from where he stood towering over Kira’s small frame. When she realized that he was distracted, she followed his line of sight to me as I made my last few steps toward the door. I didn’t miss the way the faint smile on her lips faded when she saw me.

  Maybe this – coming here, seeing him – was all a mistake.

  Chapter Four

  AJ

  “Satisfied?”

  Kira watched as I undid the last few buttons on my shirt. The look on her face baffled me. Did she really not get it?

  “Satisfied? How so?” She folded her arms over her chest and waited for me to explain further.

  Hours had passed, but I was still fuming from her display down in the banquet hall. “Kira…you escalated a semi- awkward situation to full-blown awkwardness with that one, pointless conversation.”

  Her hands shot to her hips. “Are you serious right now? My goal was to let the girl know that, just because she’s your ex, things between she and I don’t have to be weird. I was being nice.”

  No, you were being catty, but I’m smart enough to know not to say that out loud.

  “She was fine with what I said, AJ!”

  Standing there, I bit back the response that first came to mind – if she was fine with it, why’d she dart out of there like a bat out of hell afterward? I just shook my head.

  “Are you upset because I made you feel weird about this….or because I made her feel weird about this?” Kira asked.

  And there it was. Shaking my head, I rolled my eyes, raking my fingers through my hair. All these years Kira had been the picture of confidence when it came to what we notoriously referred to as ‘the Sam situation’, and now all of a sudden her true colors were showing. I knew what this was about, though. Up until now, Kira had only seen pictures of Sam – old ones from back when we were younger. However, now that she’d actually seen Sam face to face, taken her all in, she was jealous – a new emotion for her. Realizing this, I moved in to take her hands instead of blowing up like I initially thought to do. When I did, she looked up into my eyes.

  “Listen…I’m not upset. I just don’t want you working yourself up over a situation that’s been dead in the water for years. Sam is my past,” I assured her. “And you’re my future.” When I ran my hand down the side of Kira’s face, she leaned into it and held it there.

  Her eyes were locked on mine and I saw the tension beginning to melt away. She let out a long sigh and had my full attention. “Okay, moment of truth?”

  I nodded, ready to listen.

  Kira’s cheeks flushed red as I stared down at her as she wavered back and forth, wondering whether or not to admit whatever was on her mind. Her gaze fluttered up at me through her lashes. “I may have let myself get a little jealous,” she admitted.

  No…really? I just smiled and let her finish.

  “It’s just that, even though I know technically you and I have been together longer than you were with her…I don’t know, I’ve always just…sensed your connection to her. Your past with her is like this lingering pink elephant standing in the middle of our relationship. Maybe because I saw how broken you were afterward and knowing how much you loved her once upon a time.” Kira paused and let her eyes shift to the floor. “And let’s not mention how beautiful she is…”

  My posture stiffened and I did all that I could not to visualize the way Sam walked into that banquet room. All eyes were on her…including mine. While I felt like I was staring at the same girl I knew from Fairfax, she’d grown into one hell of a beautiful woman – filling out in all the right places.

  “AJ…AJ!” Kira called out when I stopped paying attention. “Were you even listening?”

  I nodded and blinked a few times.

  Kira sighed and laughed it off. “I said I’m making that appointment for you.”

/>   Confusion crossed my face. “What appointment?”

  She leveled a finger toward my tattoo and spoke forcefully about it for the first time ever. “Yeah…that’s not gonna work anymore.”

  Instinctively, my hand went to the spot where I knew Sam’s name was. “Sure…fine,” I replied aimlessly.

  Kira crossed the room and went to her purse to grab out her phone, checking to see if her boss had tried to contact her, no doubt. With her eyes still glued to the screen of her cell, she spoke again. “She still has hers, too, you know.”

  She took a tone that I couldn’t quite read, leaving me to wonder what her statement implied.

  “And?”

  Kira shrugged and tapped away, returning a text. “I don’t know. It just all seems a little weird if you ask me. You have yours. She has hers.”

  “What’re you getting at?” I came across as defensive despite my best efforts to hide it.

  “It just seems to me like, on some level, you’re both holding on to the past by holding on to those tattoos. Like I said, it’s just kinda….weird. I mean, clearly she’s with another guy, we’re getting married – it’s just ironic that you’re both committed to other people and still….kinda committed to each other in a way.” She almost mumbled that last part, but I heard it anyway.

  “What the hell is that supposed to mean?” I folded my arms across my chest and stared at her dead-on. When she put her phone away, she looked me in the eyes.

  “I –“ she shrugged her shoulders and sighed heavily, forcing a smile. “I didn’t mean anything,” she lied. “You’re right, it was a stupid thing to say and it didn’t come out right anyway.”

  Standing from her seat, Kira slung her purse over her shoulder, taking a few steps toward the door.

  “Where’re you going?” I asked, not moving to stop her.

  “Out. I just need a little air.”

  The next second, the door closed behind her and I was left there alone with my thoughts. I kicked off my shoes and sprawled out on the bed. We’d only been here about six hours, and already there was drama and tension. Now, more than before, I wished to be at home in D.C., minding my own business, leaving the past in the past where it belonged.

  Kira had been on high alert with the jealousy since the second we got here. She tried to pretend like everything was okay, like she didn’t feel threatened, but I knew something was up when she decided against the black pant-suit she originally planned to wear that afternoon, choosing a short, pink dress instead. Meeting my ‘one that got away’ clearly had her feeling rattled.

  My thoughts again settled on that image of Sam coming into the room downstairs. I’d done all I could to focus on the conversation with Maisha’s cousin and his wife, but the second she walked in…

  In my head, I never forgot a single detail about her. I remembered the exact shade of her skin, the soft texture of her hair, and her scent. The details of her face were permanently carved into my mind as well. However, the woman who I’d laid eyes on a little while ago was Sam, but not. When she left Charleston, she was gorgeous by all accounts. Now, though?

  Understatement.

  When I caught myself thinking about her instead of Kira, I rolled over onto my side and corrected the problem.

  Half an hour passed before I decided to call Kira’s phone to see where she’d gone. Originally, I assumed she just stepped outside the hotel to gather her thoughts, but she would’ve been back by now. Two unanswered calls later, I slipped into my shoes and took to the halls in the wife-beater and jeans I’d been lounging in. The elevator doors opened immediately and I pressed the button for it to take me down the four floors to the lobby.

  I shoved my hands in my pockets and leaned against the back wall while I stared at the ceiling, waiting. The music blaring through the speakers sucked pretty hard so I mostly concentrated on tuning it out. When the elevator doors opened, I looked down semi-startled because I wasn’t paying attention, and then froze.

  Sam stood there alone on the other side of the threshold with the same expression plastered across her face. She clutched her purse over her shoulder and finally put one foot in front of the other to step inside the elevator, turning her back to me once she was officially in my personal space – standing only a foot or so away.

  It felt like the heat in that small box climbed well over one hundred degrees with all the tension. She had a white-knuckle grip on the strap of her bag and I could see each labored breath that she took. Standing there, even with me fighting it, I couldn’t help what happened next. Whether it was purely the man in me, or because I was so used to doing this in her presence…I checked her out.

  Hard.

  She still wore the gray shorts and jacket from earlier – the ones that barely came below where her backside cupped under and met her thighs. The two, perfectly sculpted mounds beneath the material were tight and full, even more so than I remembered. Clearly, time had done her body right.

  Forcing my eyes north before I got caught, her reflection in the mirrored doors was one of sheer terror. If I had to guess, I’d say she was counting the seconds until this ride to the first floor was over. Things were too tense, though, and I had to say something to break the ice. We’d never survive this weekend if one of us didn’t.

  “So…how’ve you been?” I managed to say without letting on that I was about as uncomfortable as she was.

  She actually jumped a little at the sound of my voice.

  “Uh – good. Things’ve been good.” A moment passed before she added, “And you? H-how’ve you been?” She glanced back over her shoulder at me for a brief second.

  I nodded and replied with a generic, “Good.”

  She nodded and cleared her throat. Was that it? That was all either of us had to say to one another after five long years?

  “Well…I’ll see ya,” she said with an air of relief in her tone when the doors parted again and she breezed out into the lobby. Within a matter of seconds, she was halfway down the hall, headed toward the back entrance. Shaking my head, I stared as her hips drifted from side to side, and refocused on the task at hand – finding Kira.

  I tried her phone again only to have it go to voicemail after a few rings just like before. I made it to the parking lot and, of course, my car was gone. She didn’t know her way around Boston any more than I did, so it shocked me that she’d actually left. Clearly she was more upset by all of this than I realized. And all for nothing, might I add.

  The awkward exchange with Sam came back to mind and I dwelled on how wrong Kira was about all of this. There was nothing left between Sam and me to the point that we couldn’t even find conversation for one another. If she’d seen that, it definitely would’ve set her mind at ease.

  Realizing that I was gonna just have to wait for Kira to return, I went back to our room and took a nap for the two hours that I had before having to be up and ready for the rehearsal. With only ten minutes before needing to head over to the church, I was just getting ready to call myself a cab when Kira traipsed back through the door. I stared at her for a second, but didn’t question her about where she’d been.

  “Are you still coming?” I asked.

  She finally made eye contact and shook her head. “I don’t think so. But you go ahead without me. I’m not really feeling up to it.”

  Is she really going to hold on to this?

  I didn’t say a word. If she wanted to be petty and childish about this, I’d let her do just that. Snatching my keys from where she’d set them on top of her purse, I left Kira behind.

  Finding the church was pretty easy with the GPS. A quick fifteen minute drive and I was parked in the lot. Terrell instructed the guys to hang a left at the entrance and walk to the room at the end of the hall. When I got there, I found him sitting on a large sectional couch in some sort of a lounging area, talking to five or six other guys who I assumed were also in the wedding.

  “Whassup, man?” Terrell greeted me.

  I nodded. “Whassup.”


  “Lemme introduce you to everybody.” Pointing to the large, bald guy to his left, he announced, “This is Ced, my cousin from St. Louis.”

  I nodded politely to acknowledge him.

  “This is Dominic, Al, and my boy Pete that I went to high school with,” he added.

  Again I did the courtesy nod and kept listening.

  “And these two over here, John and Floyd, are Maisha’s cousins. Everybody, this is my boy, AJ.”

  Variations of greetings, head nods, and handshakes came my way, and then the men went back to their conversation. Terrell got up from the couch and came to where I stood by the door.

  “You got Kira settled in the sanctuary before you came in here? There’re a few other spouses and whatnot that came with some of the other bridal party members. She’ll be cool in there with them.”

  I shook my head. “Nah…she didn’t come.”

  Terrell cocked his head to the side. “Everything alright?”

  If it’d been anyone else, I would’ve lied and told him that nothing was the matter, but seeing as how Terrell and Karl were about the closest things I had to having actual brothers, I went ahead and told him.

  “She freaked herself out meeting Sam, so she decided at the last minute not to come tonight.”

  Terrell raised an eyebrow. “Oh, wow. But y’all didn’t even speak, did you? You and Sam, I mean.”

  “Nope. Not a word.” I left out the part about the brief exchange in the elevator because that didn’t really count.

  “I mean…did she just not wanna be around her?” Terrell asked. “She knew Sam would be here for the wedding and everything, right?”

  I nodded. “She knew. I don’t know what her deal is.”

  Terrell shook his head and placed a hand on my shoulder. “Well, we won’t be here too late. Maisha wants to start in a few minutes, and then you can head back and work things out with your girl.”