by Kit Tunstall
He stiffened before his arms came around me. “I think you’re pretty amazing too. Those are some good shots, for an amateur.”
I rolled my eyes. “Those are good shots for anyone.”
His lips twitched as he looked down at me. “Yeah, five shots out of a hundred. Those are good odds.”
I smacked his chest lightly, realizing I was still plastered against him. I made no effort to move away, and he didn’t either. “I think I have a natural talent.”
His voice deepened, rumbling through my body when he spoke. “I have no doubt you’re talented at many things, Lyss.”
I hadn’t heard the nickname in a long time, not since my best friend had moved away in eighth grade, but it sounded perfect on his lips. Those soft, full, highly kissable lips. My gaze focused on the anatomy in question, and I licked my lips as hunger spread through me.
“It’s been a long time since I held a woman. I should let you go.”
I shook my head. “I don’t want to be let go.”
He tipped his head slightly. “Aren’t you and Shane together?”
I shrugged. “We were yesterday, but we didn’t exchange vows or promise monogamy. I think we’re all just trying to get through, and moments like these make the really sucky ones better.”
“I can’t argue with that.” He lifted me into his arms, his hands cupping my ass before he set me on the platform beside the loaded gun. I’d flicked on the safety, so I knew we weren’t going to get shot during our impromptu passionate moment, but it still made me nervous to have it right there.
As though sensing that, he stepped away from me, taking the gun and putting it back in the safe. As he returned, he stripped off his khaki-green tank top, leaving him in just his dog tags, pants, and boots.
His chest was as perfect as I’d imagined, his gleaming skin such a contrast to my paler shade when I put my hand on his chest, lightly raking my nails over his nipple as he hissed in pleasure.
“You look good enough to eat.”
I blushed at the compliment, returning it with a saucy wink. “So do you.”
He didn’t stop me as I slid off the platform, dropping to my knees in one smooth motion as I did so. I moved with an innate grace I hadn’t known I was capable of as I reached up to undo his pants, sliding the camouflage down his legs until his cock sprang free. I swallowed, slightly intimidated by the size, but determined to follow through.
I grasped his thick shaft in one hand and guided it to my lips, opening my mouth slowly to take him inside. It wasn’t just to prolong his pleasure. I had a difficult time fitting him completely in my mouth. Once he was inside, I sucked in my cheeks and began to bob my head, running my tongue around all the spots it could reach. I had no idea what I was doing, but it wasn’t exactly brain surgery. Insert cock and suck. Those seem like pretty straightforward instructions, and that’s what I did.
He put a large hand on my head, his fingers plowing through my black strands to hold me against him. It wasn’t a punishing or intimidating hold, and I could have broken free if I’d wanted. I just had no desire to do so as I continue to lavish attention on his thick erection.
He thrust gently in and out of my mouth, moving with the pace I set. His pre-cum leaked continuously onto my tongue, flowing gently down my throat. I was certain when he came, it would be a lot more forceful, and there’d be copious amounts rather than this steady trickle. As his cock started to twitch, I braced myself for a torrent of cum that never came.
Instead, Jamar bent down and lifted me to my feet, putting me on the platform once more. I gripped each side of the stall to maintain my balance as he spread my thighs apart, pushing my knees almost to my chest to open me up fully before bending his head. The first swirl of his tongue around my clit made me moan, and it escalated to a sob when he started sucking lightly on the taut bud. His tongue delved lower, smoothing down my slit before stabbing inside the opening in a rapid pace.
It only made me want more, and I arched my hips as I rode his face, suddenly appreciating his smooth head. I’d wondered what he would look like with hair, and I was glad he kept his pate smooth and clean-shaven. It was an interesting sensation to feel soft skin against my thighs as his mouth pleasured me.
He didn’t stop until I’d come, my sheath contracting around his tongue as pulses of pleasure shot through me, making me jerk in reaction. I whimpered at the intensity, unable to speak for a moment before he lined himself up, his cock pressing against my opening.
Since I’d been a virgin until yesterday, I was still tight, and it was vaguely uncomfortable, just like it had been when Shane entered me the day before. My body soon relaxed and adjusted, stretching around him, but still clinging like a needy girlfriend.
Our gazes locked as he began to thrust in and out of me, and the tenderness in his eyes blew me away. I was clearly the sole focus of his attention, and my enjoyment was paramount. That alone was enough to send me closer to orgasm, but when combined with the way he rolled his hips as he pressed into me, which rubbed against my g-spot, it was enough to send me flying over the edge quicker than I’d anticipated.
Jamar followed me, his shaft twitching inside me before his seed filled me. I made a mental note to start birth control pills that day, because the last thing I wanted was an unplanned pregnancy in the middle of the apocalypse, especially when there could be two possible fathers. Maybe that should have shamed me, but it didn’t. I kind of liked the idea of having either one of their babies, but I was far too young to consider that at the moment. It was an abstract concept, but I would have been proud to be the mother of either Shane or Jamar’s baby. Someday.
When it was over, he helped me down and carried me into the shower room. We washed off quickly, expecting the group to be back any moment. Shane and I hadn’t declared any intentions or requested monogamy, but I didn’t want him to find out I’d been fucking Jamar this way. I had every intention of telling him, but I didn’t want him to walk in on us and get weirded out or upset before we had a chance to talk.
We’d been dressed and were playing a game of chess when the lift hummed to indicate the Humvee was returning. I slid from my chair at the table and walked quickly beside Jamar, having to take two steps for each one of his, since his legs were much longer than mine. I was a little breathless by the time we reached the main room, but I forgot about my reaction to the exercise when the doors opened, and the four of them spilled out with a frantic air.
I quickly realized why. Maddox was bleeding from his chest and stomach, and there was so much blood. He was pale, and all I could remember was his cheeks and flesh last night when he’d masturbated before me, filling with color as he’d come. He didn’t even look like the same person, he was so pallid and limp. “What happened?” I asked a second before Jamar uttered the same question.
Shane didn’t look up at us as he kept applying pressure to the wound. “We had a run-in with a nasty group, and they were well armed. Maddox got caught in the crossfire.”
They had eased him down to the cement floor, and I was horrified by the blood spreading around him. I knew every time I saw that stain, I’d think of this moment, and it sent a shudder through me. “Is there some way I can help?”
Shane looked up. “Do you have any medical training?”
I shook my head. “I’m sorry. I took a first-aid unit in high school, since it was a required part of health class, and I did after-school reception for a friend of my father’s, but he was a dentist, and I never had any medical training. Not even terminology.” I was babbling, and I quickly shut off the words spilling from my mouth. Basically, I was as useless in this situation as I’d been against the rapist yesterday.
At first, I wondered why they made no move to move to transport him to the infirmary. Surely, a base this big must have one, and it seemed ridiculous to leave him lying on the cement.
From his harsh breathing, which escalated rapidly, I soon discerned there was no point in moving into the infirmary. It was obvious in the set o
f their shoulders and the body language around me that none of the men expected Maddox to make it.
Acting on instinct, I got on my knees on the floor and took his hand. His eyes fluttered open for a moment as I ran my thumb gently across the back of his hand. “How are you doing?” When he tried to answer, blood bubbled from his lips, and I tried not to flinch at the sight.
“Could have been amazing.” His words might have referred to how his state of health could have been if he hadn’t been shot, but I was oddly certain he was talking about our missed opportunity last night. We could have connected then, and though it would have made it even harder to lose him, I regretted that I hadn’t seized the opening. I wouldn’t make that mistake again, I vowed, as his hand went slack in mine, and his eyes closed a few seconds later.
One moment, he was alive, and the next he was gone. I’d seen more death, witnessed more direct dying, than anyone my age should ever have to. Hell, anyone anyone’s age shouldn’t have to see the losses I’d endured, and I was certain the four man around me felt the same way. As soldiers, they’d probably seen far worse than I had while deployed to war zones, but this loss seemed to affect them all on a deep level.
I was touched as the four of them formed a semi-circle around their fallen comrade, joining their hands and bowing their head in a silent gesture of respect and loss for their fallen brother.
Sitting there on the floor, not quite brave enough to stand up and join them in their circle of loss, I vowed I do everything in my power to make sure I didn’t lose any of the four remaining. It would be an empty promise to myself unless I learned how to back it up, and I was determined to throw myself into training and get ready to survive this harsh new world on my own, if I ever had to. I didn’t want to be alone, so that meant keeping my men alive. They would watch out for me, and I was equally determined to have their backs.
PART THREE: TOO HOT TO HANDLE
Chapter One
We buried Maddox aboveground, taking the platform up and walking out of the empty warehouse to the lot surrounding it. The men took turns digging, rebuffing my offer to help. I didn’t think it was just macho bullshit. They had known Maddox far better than I had, and perhaps each needed to feel they were contributing to creating his final resting place. It was a tribute to the young man who’d fallen, and in this shitty world, it was all they could do.
After Shane had taken his turn, he joined me on what was left of the dried brown grass, dropping down and taking the bottle of water I handed him with a grateful nod. He swallowed half with his first gulp before putting the lid on and wiping his arm across his sweaty brow. I put a hand on his leg, offering silent comfort, as I asked, “Who did this?”
“A bunch of assholes at that Costco in Cheyenne. We’ve been pushing out farther on our runs, trying to strip everything we can as quickly as possible, and that means going back into the larger cities.” He shuddered. “They’re disgusting. Full of rotting bodies and probably more diseases than we know how to pronounce. We’ve been wearing masks when we go in, but it’s still an unpleasant place to visit.” He laughed sharply. Unpleasant.” He shook his head, clearly sardonic about his own choice of words.
“What happened?”
Shane turned the bottle of water in his hands, his gaze locked on it as though it held all the answers of the universe. “We figured there might be people there, since it’s a logical place to hole up if you’re going to be dumb enough to stay in the cities. We approached with caution and certainly not with guns blazing. We drove into the parking lot, and Maddox stepped out to greet the people who were standing on the roof, clearly acting as guard. They didn’t tell us to go away or anything. They just shot him.”
I gasped. “How can they just shoot someone? He clearly wasn’t a threat.”
“Don’t kid yourself, baby. Everyone can be a threat in this new world, but the attitude of shoot first, ask later isn’t a practical solution if you’re trying to rebuild society.”
I leaned back, bracing my hands on my palms as I watched Han’s muscles rhythmically flex while he deepened the hole. “Fuck society. I’d be content with just finding a safe place where we can survive. I would consider it a luxury if we’re able to be happy again.”
He put his arm around me, and I leaned against him. From the corner of my eye, I realized Wesley was watching, a look of hunger on his face. I smiled at him, but then turned my attention to Shane. It was nice to cuddle with someone, to feel a connection, no matter how brief.
Soon enough, the moment was shattered by the completion of the grave. They carefully lowered Maddox into it, and filling in was much faster than digging it had been. As we stood around the gravesite, I waited for someone to say something, but the silence lengthened. Hesitantly, I asked, “Should we pray or something?” My parents hadn’t been churchgoers, so I didn’t know any formal prayers. I certainly had no idea what one said at a funeral. I knew it had something to do with valleys and shadows, but I had never memorized the psalm.
Jamar shook his head, and his stark expression, filled with anger and loss, was the complete opposite of the beautiful look he’d worn earlier when he came inside me. That might as well have been a hundred years ago with the way everything had changed again so abruptly.
“As far as I know, Maddox didn’t believe in much of anything spiritual. It’s hard to believe in any divine power with the world going to Hell around us.”
I nodded, falling silent along with the rest of them. At some point, they turned away from his grave and moved as one back toward the warehouse building. I went with them, looking back just once at the simple stone marker, reminding myself of what I’d decided earlier. I wasn’t going to lose the rest of the group.
The group was mostly silent, other than an occasional word spoken, for the rest of the evening. A pall had fallen over the place, and even I felt it, though I had barely known Maddox. It was terrible losing someone you loved, but it was surprisingly hard to lose someone you barely knew when the world’s population had shrunk so drastically in less than a year.
As I slipped into bed that evening, it seemed like a million years ago when I’d crept out of my bunk last night in search of relief from the desire surging through me. It was crazy to think Maddox had gone from our encounter last night to completely out of the world tonight. Twenty-four hours could change your life forever.
Not even twenty-four hours. Everything could change in seconds, especially in the world we lived in now. It was a depressing thought, and I definitely had no need to find a quiet place to masturbate tonight. Sex was the last thing on my mind. Instead, I kept imagining how it must have been for Maddox in his last few seconds. Had he realized they were going to kill him, or had it been a total shock? Obviously, he’d had no time to get back into the SUV. I hoped he’d gone quickly and without fear. A peaceful death was about all any of us could ask for these days.
Han didn’t wake me the next morning for the anticipated torture session of exercise, but I dressed in clothes that would be comfortable for working out anyway. As much as I didn’t want to, I forced myself to run a few laps before exploring the gym. There were machines I didn’t recognize, and I had no clue how to use them, so I stuck with the basics that I remembered from high school gym class. Surprisingly, it felt good to work out, though I expected to be stiff and sore later.
Afterward, I stopped by the shower, discovering I had the room to myself, and took a quick one. My hair was tangled and matted, and it took the longest to wash. Afterward, as I dried off, the wet strands clinging to my mid-back, I decided I needed to be more practical. I was going to have to cut my hair, though I’d been growing it for years. I’d had regular haircuts for maintenance, but I’d never touched the length, aside from removing split ends, since at least seventh grade.
Moisture filled my eyes, and they started to burn when I remembered why I’d started growing out my hair. That had been the summer my mom decided to grow hers and donate it to the charity that made wigs for children with can
cer after one of her friends’ son had been diagnosed with leukemia and had gone bald from treatment. Becki and I had thought that was a great idea, so we’d joined her in the endeavor.
At the end of six months, they both had hair long enough to donate, and they’d gone in for their haircuts. I’d planned to join them, but I changed my mind at the last minute. It wasn’t to be selfish or to deny bald kids wigs made from my hair. I’d just decided I wanted to see how long I could get it. It had been a major source of vanity for me, so the idea of cutting it now was a big deal, though I wasn’t certain any of the four men in the building would understand my strange attachment to my hair.
I’d have to ask one of them to help me if I wanted it to like half-decent. For now, I just dried it off and slipped the damp strands into a ponytail before leaving the bathroom in search of food.
They were all in the mess hall, though there was no food in sight. I’d slept in later than the rest of them, and after my workout, it was already after nine a.m. I figured they’d eaten far earlier than me. Now, they just sat at one of the long tables, each engrossed in something. Jamar and Han played a game of chess, and Shane was reading a thick book that reminded me of a dictionary or thesaurus, though I doubted it was either of those. Wesley thumbed through a comic book, laughing every few frames in a soft way. The sound of amusement was a little jarring with the dark mood cast over the place, but I was glad to see signs of normality.
Han noticed me first. “Good morning, sleeping beauty.”
I touched my damp hair self-consciously. “I thought you’d wake me up early to torture me again.”
He shrugged. “We’re having a day off.”
I moved closer to the table. “I’ll have you know I just finished running and lifting weights. I now know why we call it the Hell Virus. Surviving this reality is hell.”
He grinned at me, his expression completely absent of any sympathy or compassion. “No one ever died from exercise, Lyss.”