Tracing Invisible Threads

by C. Fonseca

  A loud rapping on the window made them spring apart.

  Harold was standing there tapping his watch, which left no opportunity for Alexa to give Eleanor any explanations or offer an excuse for her decision.

  Eleanor wound down the window. “Hi, Dad.”

  “Glad you’re back safely, girls, but it’s time to go, Eleanor.”

  Alexa resisted the urge and didn’t ask Eleanor to meet her earlier in the week.

  * * *

  Eleanor stopped running, bent over, and placed her hands on her knees to catch her breath. Looking through her legs back down Fairview Park’s oak-lined boulevard, Eleanor saw her brother scurrying along the pathway.

  He fell onto the grass beside her. “Why on earth are you running like a bat out of hell?” Leo asked through laboured breaths. “We already know you’re in much better condition than I am.”

  She laughed, leaning over to ruffle his hair. “It comes from you sitting behind a desk all day.”

  “Well, we don’t all lead exciting lives like you.” He mopped his forehead with the front of his T-shirt. “Speaking of work, how was the Queensland job? Nice for some.”

  Eleanor sprang to her feet and bounced on her toes. “It was amazing to be involved with the project. The magazine wants to use some of the other photos I shot up north for a side piece on ecotourism. I need to spend a couple of days in the studio putting things together in the digital darkroom.”

  “Terrific,” Leo said with a wide grin. “I gather the media tried to make something of you and Mia being in the same place at the same time. Anything I should know?”

  “Absolutely not. She’s about to become a mother.” Eleanor took a swig out of her water bottle and clipped it to the top of her running tights. “It was nice to catch up, though. By the way, Mia said hello.”

  “It seems she’s doing well for herself in Hollywood, both professionally and personally. I’m glad to hear she’s got her shit together,” he said, sounding genuinely delighted. “What about you and the very attractive librarian? How is Alexa?” He raised his eyebrows. “You spent the whole weekend together, didn’t you? Is it serious?”

  Eleanor shrugged, trying to seem indifferent.

  Leo extended his arm, and Eleanor took hold of his hand and pulled him off the grass.

  She wished she could give Leo a positive answer. “You’re full of questions this morning, aren’t you?”

  “Hey, I’m getting used to having you around. Even though you whip my ass every damn time we run together,” Leo said with a hang dog look. “As you know, I’m on a flight to Canberra this afternoon. I want to know more about what you’ve been up to. Come on, let’s walk back, and you can fill me in.”

  Twenty minutes later, they parked themselves on the bench seat in the courtyard garden that separated the studio from their parents’ house. Eleanor leaned forward to unfasten her running shoes and peel off her sweaty socks, sighing contentedly at the pleasant burn in her muscles.

  Leo tapped her bare foot. “What a remarkable coincidence that the Chinese herbalist turned out to be Alexa’s ancestor. Astonishing. You two have forged quite a connection, wouldn’t you say?”

  “Yes. You’d think she’d be eager to see me again soon, wouldn’t you?” Eleanor rubbed her forehead. “But yesterday, when she dropped me off and we said our good-byes, Alexa informed me we’d next see each other on Sunday, at her grandmother’s house. I have to say, it threw me, considering how affectionate she’d been on the weekend.”

  “Well, crap,” Leo said, shaking his head. “That was a quick change in direction after you’d shared an intense couple of days and nights. Must have come as a surprise. Can you even wait five days until you see her again?”

  “Yeah, well, not like I have a choice.” Eleanor blew a strand of hair out of her eyes. She wasn’t pleased by it, but Alexa had made the decision for her.

  “Hmm.”

  Eleanor trusted her brother’s opinion and hoped he could give her some sort of advice on Alexa’s puzzling behaviour. “What do you think, Leo?”

  Leo gave her a probing stare. “Why didn’t you suggest meeting earlier in the week if that’s what you want?”

  “It just didn’t feel like she was giving me an option.” Eleanor sighed. “Anyway, Dad was tapping at the car window as soon as we got back. We were running late.”

  “Did you say something to scare her off?”

  “No, of course not.” At least not while Alexa was awake.

  “Who are you scaring off?” They both jumped at the sound of their father’s voice.

  “Jeez, Dad, what are you doing sneaking around?” Leo asked.

  “It is my garden,” their father replied, his eyes crinkling in the bright sunlight. “And you haven’t answered my question, Nell.” He smiled, pushing his hand through his thick silvery-grey hair, which was disarranged, as if he’d just woken from an afternoon nap.

  “You might as well join us.” Leo jumped to his feet and lifted one of the wooden chairs that were clustered around an outdoor table, placing it next to Eleanor. “Sit yourself down, Dad.”

  He perched beside her and crossed his legs. “What are we talking about?”

  “Women problems,” Leo blurted.

  Eleanor shot him a glare. “Thanks, Leo.”

  “Do you need some advice from an old man?” Their father laughed softly.

  “You might as well try, Dad. She won’t take my advice.” Leo huffed.

  “I don’t recall you giving me any advice,” Eleanor said. “Besides, you’re hardly the expert on matters of love.”

  “Ah-ha,” her dad drew out the words. “Is this about Ms Bellamy?”

  Leo rhythmically stamped his feet on the ground and tapped his bare knees. “Woohoo…”

  Their father scratched his eyebrow. “When is your next date?”

  Eleanor shifted around on the bench. It had been a long time since she’d discussed such sensitive issues with her family. “Our next date is Sunday lunch with Grandma and a cat named Bruce.”

  Both men laughed heartily.

  Leo nearly tipped the bench backwards.

  “It’s not that funny,” Eleanor said, although she was unable to keep herself from grinning, so infectious was their amusement. Maybe it was best to laugh and not take the whole thing too seriously.

  “May I join in the merriment?” Her mother closed the side gate. She glanced from Leo to Eleanor and then her gaze rested on her husband. She blew him a kiss.

  As far as Eleanor was concerned, they’d finished their conversation about Alexa just in time. She’d rather not have to suffer through her mother’s viewpoint.

  “Hello, darling,” her father greeted her affectionately. “You’re home from the office early. Glad you can join us.”

  Her mother nodded. “I have some work to take care of from home. What’s going on out here, family?” She pushed up the sleeve of her well-cut navy suit jacket, glanced at her wristwatch and then down at Leo as if he was still a twelve-year-old schoolboy. “Leo, your ride to the airport should be here in fifteen minutes. Don’t you need to shower?”

  Leo stood and cleared his throat. “Suppose I’d better get a move on. Here, sit down and join the fun.”

  “Are you grabbing an Uber? Let me take you, Leo,” Eleanor said, not wanting Leo to have to pay for an Uber when she had no plans.

  “Thanks, sis, but it won’t be necessary.” He sauntered towards the main house as if he had all the time in the world. “I have a ride.”

  “Is one of your mates giving you a lift?”

  “Err…yep,” he said. “Car-pooling.”

  Her mother took a seat in the vacated chair, adjusted her skirt, and crossed her legs at the knee. “Stella offered to swing by here and pick up Leo on her way to the airport.”

  Stella?

  Eleanor look
ed from one parent to the other with raised eyebrows. “Stella? Do you mean Stella Wright?”

  Leo stopped at the patio doors, turned, and called, “Excellent arbitrator, Eleanor. If you should ever need one,” he added with a quick wink before disappearing inside.

  Her father nodded slyly and smiled at Eleanor. “She is excellent at her job, and rather charming too.”

  “It’s the Law Forum held in Canberra every two years. Stella is one of the key speakers,” her mother explained with a slight rise of her eyebrows. “Leo should have been ready. Why don’t you stay here with your father and talk to her? She could arrive anytime. I have a phone conference; I must go and prepare.”

  Eleanor resisted the urge to roll her eyes. She wasn’t in the mood to entertain Stella. She kissed her father’s cheek and pushed herself off the bench. “Sorry, Stella is all yours. There’s work in the darkroom that has to be finished. Deadlines to meet.”

  Her mother shook her head and walked off in the direction of the house.

  Eleanor collected her runners and socks and hightailed it towards the studio.

  He laughed. “Don’t worry, you two. I’ll be here.”

  Were they still trying to set her up with Judge Wright’s daughter, even though it was obvious she was involved with Alexa? Eleanor couldn’t believe it. Why hadn’t Leo mentioned Stella was coming to the house? The rat.

  “Hold up a minute, Eleanor,” her mother called just as she reached the studio door.

  Eleanor sighed and turned. “Yes, Mother?”

  “Are you okay?” The tight note in her mother’s voice hinted at concern.

  Eleanor took a deep breath. “I’m fine. Why?” She dropped her runners into the shoe storage box near the front door and tucked her socks into her hip pocket.

  Her mother gave her a long, questioning stare. “Are you sure? Your father mentioned things seemed a little strained between you and Alexa when you got home from the country.”

  “Really?” Eleanor lowered her gaze. “Everything’s okay. We’d been delayed, and I was worried Dad would miss his appointment. That’s all.” She punched the code into the access panel, pushed open her door, and stood facing her mother. “Anything else?” Eleanor crossed her arms in front of her chest. While she appreciated her mother’s concern, it made her feel exposed and uncomfortable.

  “No, just checking on you.” Her mother leaned forward and kissed her forehead, gently placing her hand over Eleanor’s sternum. “Just tread carefully, Eleanor.”

  Eleanor watched her mother’s retreating figure as she disappeared around the corner of the house. A prickle travelled up Eleanor’s spine as she absorbed her mum’s warning. Her mother was right; Eleanor should tread carefully, and that meant giving Alexa space. Her chest grew tight at the mere thought of spending five whole days apart from Alexa, but Alexa had laid down the terms, and Eleanor intended to respect them. Even so, she hoped Alexa would cave before Sunday. Eleanor knew she hadn’t imagined their connection—the invisible thread that drew them together.

  * * *

  “You don’t usually visit on a Tuesday evening. And why didn’t you bring Eleanor?” Alexa’s grandmother asked. “I would have liked to see her tonight, and she would have liked my sticky coconut cake.”

  At the mention of Eleanor, Alexa took a deep breath, doing her best to display a casual air. “I wanted to check up on you, and I have some news.” She sipped her calming aromatic tea while Gran doled out a generous portion of coconut cake onto their plates. “Eleanor sends her love, Granny. I’m not sure what she’s doing tonight.” Alexa had been fairly noncommittal when they’d hurriedly parted yesterday, and today it took all of Alexa’s strength not to message her. But she’d succeeded. She was proud of herself.

  “Okay, then. I’ll package up a couple of slices, and you can deliver them to her.”

  “I won’t be seeing her until Sunday, when we both come here for lunch.”

  Her grandmother’s eyebrows shot up in an incredulous stare. “You’ll see her before then, surely?”

  When Alexa shook her head, Gran asked, “Is Eleanor off on assignment again?”

  “No, I don’t think so,” Alexa mumbled, reaching for the napkin she’d dropped under the table.

  Her grandmother sharply tapped the ornate cake server on the edge of the plate. “Don’t mutter, darling; my hearing is not the best.”

  “Sorry, Granny. I said, no, she isn’t going away.” Why had she even told Granny that she wasn’t seeing Eleanor until Sunday? Alexa folded the napkin, placed it neatly on the table, and gazed out the window at the garden, where plump lemons hung from the tree in the centre of a patch of lawn. “That reminds me. Can I pinch a couple of lemons before I go?”

  Gran gave her a quick nod. “Don’t change the subject, dear. You haven’t had a quarrel, have you?”

  “What?” Alexa blurted. “I mean, no.” She wasn’t sure how to answer truthfully. They hadn’t quarrelled, but whatever had happened was her doing. She regretted that she’d disappointed Eleanor but didn’t regret her decision.

  “We had a really great weekend together. There’s so much to tell you. You won’t believe what we discovered,” Alexa said. “Anyway, it’s a good idea for Eleanor and me to take a break this week. We’ve both got a lot on.”

  Gran frowned. “Whose idea was that, Alexa?”

  Alexa stared at her napkin. “I don’t exactly have a good track record when it comes to dating and commitment. As you know, I run for the hills when a girl arrives on the doorstep with a toothbrush in hand.”

  Her grandmother slowly shook her head. “And why would you do that now? I recall it was you who invited Eleanor away for the weekend.”

  “I did.” Alexa cleared her throat and poured herself another cup of tea. “Things seem to be moving a little too fast for me.”

  Her grandmother gave her a knowing look. “What are you afraid of, darling?”

  Alexa pulled at her collar. “What do you think? People just end up getting hurt. Like Mum; she was devastated when my cowardly father left us and ran off with his personal assistant. Like you, left all alone when Grandad died. What if I’m just like Dad, incapable of maintaining a relationship? I could hurt Eleanor.”

  “Dear Alexa, I’m so sorry you feel that way.” Gran clasped her hands together. “You are not like him.”

  “How can you be sure of that?”

  “I’m sure because you’re worrying about Eleanor. You’re considering her feelings,” she said. “Your father, well, he’s onto his third wife now, isn’t he? Same pattern, just a younger version. He hurt your mother so badly, it’s true, and even though she had other men in her life she never fully trusted anyone enough to marry again.” Gran sighed.

  Gran made it all seem quite simple. Alexa didn’t have to act like her father or make the same mistakes. She didn’t want to hurt anyone, especially not Eleanor. But she also didn’t want Eleanor to hurt her. “I’m scared to ask Eleanor about her plans for the future. I’m scared of being hurt too,” she said quietly. “I need a few days to think things through.”

  “Don’t take too long, Alexa. Just talk to her. Communicate.”

  “I’ll try.” Alexa knew deep inside she shouldn’t allow the demon of doubt to lead her down a negative path. She should message Eleanor to reassure her that she was very much looking forward to Sunday. The thought brought the first genuine smile to her face since she’d seen Eleanor yesterday.

  “Good. You have to begin somewhere,” Gran said firmly. “I was unlucky to lose the love of my life so soon, but you know, the time I had with Gerald gave me an abundance of love that has lasted a lifetime. It also gave me the two greatest gifts. Eloise, and you.”

  Tears blurred Alexa’s eyes, and she wiped them with her sleeve.

  Gran took her hands and squeezed them firmly between her own. “Your parents’ relationship wasn’
t a good example for you. Mahjong teaches us it’s not the tiles you start with but the decisions you make that define your life. Love never works perfectly all the time, but that doesn’t mean it’s not worth the risk. Everyone is afraid of getting hurt.”

  “Everything seems to be moving too fast, Granny. I’m not used to feeling so much…” Alexa bit her lip and exhaled shakily. “So much, so soon. I don’t like feeling out of control.”

  “Ahh, yes. That’s a scary feeling indeed.” Gran smiled. “But unless you have strong beliefs about the benefits of a single life, you are going to have to change. You’ve enjoyed being single, but do you want to be alone forever?”

  Alexa shook her head. For the most part, she did enjoy the single life. After a string of unfulfilling liaisons, she’d come to believe the right woman for her didn’t exist. Because Eleanor had come along and chipped away at her defences, Alexa was having second thoughts. She couldn’t even think of Eleanor without a pleasurable warmth spreading through her. Was this just lust, or was it different? Was this love? Was she prepared to make a commitment to Eleanor?

  Bruce appeared from nowhere, jumped up onto Alexa’s lap, and bumped the top of his head against her chin, his rumbling purr rising to a crescendo of joy.

  “You understand me, don’t you, Bruce?”

  Her grandmother reached across and ruffled his ginger coat. “Yes, my Bruce is a confirmed bachelor, and even though being neutered curbs his roaming, he has plenty of girlfriends in the neighbourhood.”

  “And you to come home to.” Alexa laughed. “Off you go, Bruce, and find one of your other girlfriends.” Alexa lifted the cat off her lap and onto the floor.

  He turned in circles a few times, scratched his claws on the kitchen rug, and bolted outside, the clatter of the cat flap echoing in his wake.

  “That’s my boy.” Gran chuckled.

  “Now, Granny, I’ve got so much to tell you.” Alexa reached for her satchel and extracted Phyllis’s portfolio. She cleared a space on the kitchen table and spread out several sheets of paper. Reverently, she placed the photocopy of the Chinese herbalist in front of her grandmother. Alexa’s pulse quickened as she pointed to the picture and asked, “Do you remember this?”