Heartfelt

by Danielle Allen

  “Do you feel that?” I growled against her ear before I twisted my hand in her hair and tugged gently, forcing her to look up at me.

  “Yes,” she answered breathily.

  Her lips were wet and parted slightly. I gave into the urge and sucked on her bottom lip, teasing her. She let out a sigh.

  “This is what you do to me, B.” With my free hand, I took her hand and slid it down my abs and into my boxers. “With clothes… Without clothes… In person... Over the phone… In my thoughts. It doesn’t matter. This is what you do to me.”

  Bianca’s touch was overwhelming my senses. She stroked up and down the length of me before she pulled my boxers down and I stepped out of them.

  Tugging her hair, her head fell back. I trailed kisses down her neck and over her collarbone. When her thumb rubbed over the head of my dick, I sucked in a deep breath. Between her touch and the sounds that were escaping her mouth, I couldn’t handle it.

  “You are so sexy,” I whispered against her soft skin as I cupped her heavy breasts.

  My lips made their way to her hard nipples. As soon as I captured one with my mouth, she moaned loudly. I kissed, kneaded, and sucked my way to the other nipple, letting my tongue swirl around it. The purring noises she made in the back of her throat were only making me harder.

  Standing, I grabbed Bianca by her ass and lifted her. Our mouths found each other as we kissed desperately. Throwing her arms around my neck, she held me close as I carried her to the bed. I parted her lips with my tongue and she moaned into my mouth, kissing me harder. Slowly sucking on my tongue, her fingers moved across my skin, gripping my shoulders.

  Laying her down on the bed, I spread her legs wide, opening her up for me. Eyeing her splayed out in front of me, my heart drummed in my chest. I wanted her so bad that I could almost taste her.

  Kneeling down in front of her, I pulled her hips so that her ass was hanging off of the side of the bed. Putting her legs over my shoulders, I was inches away from her. She squirmed in anticipation as I nuzzled my nose against the inside of her thigh.

  She smells so good.

  We moaned in unison as I parted her lips, sliding my finger inside of her.

  “God, you’re wet,” I choked out, my voice straining against my desire.

  I pulled my finger almost all the way out before sliding it back in.

  I need to taste her.

  When I added another finger, she incoherently moaned my name in response.

  I trailed wet kisses down the inside of her thighs. I alternated dropping kisses between her thighs, back and forth, inching closer and closer to my final destination.

  “Yes, Roman,” she encouraged as I hovered over her wetness, blowing softly onto her clean shaven flesh.

  My skin heated at the throatiness of her tone. The need in her voice matched the need I felt and her words stirred something carnal inside me.

  A low, guttural sound erupted out of me as I let my tongue slide across every inch of her slit. She arched her back violently, bucking against my tongue as I alternated between sucking and flicking her clit.

  “Yes, Ro, there,” she purred, rotating against my face.

  Replacing my fingers with my tongue, I played with her until I felt the tension building in her entire lower body. Her thighs shook against the side of my face and I couldn’t help looking up at her. And like every other time I get to touch her, taste her, and bring her to orgasm, I was in awe.

  Damn, I thought, running my free hand over the length of my dick. My body was begging for release, but I needed to take care of my girl first.

  With her hair wild and her entire body flushed, she looked like sex personified. Her lips were slightly parted and her eyes were shut tight.

  I gripped her thighs and wrapped my lips around her clit and hummed. The gentle vibrations must have had its desired effect because her body arched upward and her jaw dropped leaving her mouth opened wide.

  I groaned. It was so hot to watch her reacting to my touch.

  While using my tongue to apply pressure to her clit, I used my fingers to massage her from the inside, curving my fingers upward to rub her g-spot. Her moans became more insistent as I felt her tightening around my fingers, her thighs quivering. She gyrated against my tongue, her hands holding my head in place, trapping me. I could hardly breathe, but I couldn’t stop until I tasted her cream on my tongue.

  “Ro,” she cried wantonly. “Ro, I’m—”

  She clamped her legs around my head and shook violently. Even with her thighs muting sound, I could still hear her gasping breaths. When her legs went slack, she opened her eyes and put a hand over her heart.

  I stood and when she looked at me, my heart faltered.

  “I’ll never get enough of you, B,” I growled as I hovered over her body.

  I kissed each of her chocolate colored nipples before crashing my lips into hers. We kissed each other frantically. With deep, sloppy kisses, we moaned into each other’s mouth.

  Her hands snaked their way to my pulsating dick. She wrapped her hand around my shaft like a vice. “Please. Please let me ride you, Ro.”

  My arousal was at an all-time high, but hearing her sultry voice was almost too much.

  She has to know what she does to me.

  “Yes,” I choked out between kisses. Shifting her to the center of the bed, I never broke the kiss. Her skin was warm to the touch and the pads of my fingers caressed every part of her body that I could reach.

  Rolling me onto my back, Bianca ended the kiss as she straddled me. “Do you know what I dreamed about on the plane?”

  “No, what?”

  “This,” she whispered, leaning down to kiss me.

  Her soft lips met mine and before she had a chance to pull away, my fingers twisted into the soft curls of her hair, pulling her back into the kiss. Our tongues touched and we kissed each other hungrily.

  I can’t get enough of her, I thought, instinctively lifting my hips. I need to get inside of her.

  Bianca sat up and my gut twisted with desire. She was sexy as hell and the anticipation of feeling her hot body connecting with mine made me even harder, if that was possible. I ran my hands over her breasts, tweaking her nipples, before resting my hands on her hips.

  She lifted herself up and once our eyes locked, she sank down on my dick. I groaned loudly, closing my eyes as she took each inch of me into her. She rolled her hips, allowing me to fill her completely. Running my hands over her hips and thighs, my breathing became increasingly labored as the seconds ticked by.

  “You’re so fucking wet,” I breathed, opening my eyes for a second. Inhaling sharply, I shuddered. “And tight.”

  Oh shit, I thought, holding her in place. She feels so good.

  She panted my name in response.

  When she started moving, I forced myself to open my eyes. Letting the tempo build, I watched her work herself on me, her nails dug into my chest. Her breasts jiggled deliciously each time she bounced on my dick. Watching the desire on her face drove me crazy. I forced my hips up to meet her harder, faster. Watching her move, my heart pounded against my chest and I thought I might explode. I couldn’t contain what I was feeling.

  “I love you,” I grunted.

  “I love you. I love you. I love you,” she murmured repeatedly.

  As she lifted herself up and down on my lap, I grabbed her ass, grinding our bodies together. My fingers flexed against her skin as my toes curled. With her head tilted back and her eyes shut, I could see my effect on her.

  “Oh, God,” Bianca gasped before I felt her constricting and convulsing around my dick. With a loud feral groan, I came with her.

  She fell forward onto my chest. Enveloping her in my arms, I held her. In that position, I felt her, all of her, and I felt overwhelmed. Feeling her heart beating rapidly, her breaths coming quickly, and the heat from her body, I held her tighter. Inhaling deeply, I smelled the coconut oil in her hair, the vanilla perfume she wore, and the sex in the air.

&nb
sp; After a while, I rolled us onto our sides. We were still wrapped into each other when our heads hit the pillows. Bianca looked at me languidly. “I am a very lucky woman.”

  Kissing her full lips softly, I smiled. “I’m the lucky one.”

  I smoothed her hair down and away from her face.

  “Long distance is hard,” she murmured with heavy-lidded eyes. “I miss you all the time. It wasn’t this hard when I was in Italy.”

  “I didn’t know what I was missing when you were in Italy. Had I known, I probably would’ve moved to Italy.”

  She was quiet for a minute. “I wish we lived in the same city. I believe long distance relationships can work. I believe in us. But I hate that we’ve never had a chance to be together in the same city. I wish we could somehow be together.”

  I don’t want to mess this up. B is the woman for me. I trust her. I trust what we’ve built. I believe in us, but I don’t believe in long distance relationships. I would so much rather her be here with me. But what am I supposed to say? I am not going to make her choose between me and her dream job. I won’t do that to her.

  Kissing her forehead and pulling her into my chest, I answered, “Yeah.”

  We were both quiet. The silence surrounded us, but I couldn’t stop my mind from racing loudly. After a few minutes, her steady breathing let me know that she was fast asleep. I kept my eyes closed and listened to the soft noises she made as she slept. Maybe it was the sex or the result of feeling emotional, but a thought occurred to me.

  She said that there are two apartments available in her neighborhood in Chelsea.

  When I woke up hours later, the same thought kept running through my mind. I weighed the pros and cons of moving to New York.

  Okay in New York, the biggest thing is that Bianca is there. And there’s the art scene. Charlotte Spence is located in New York. Inspiration from the city that never sleeps. In Richmond, there’s Easy and Malik. There’s my teaching position in the event that my art dreams die and no longer generate an income. I own a home and my studio is here. The family I never knew lived here.

  I went back and forth comparing the new adventure of New York versus the stability of Richmond. After a full two hours of weighing my options, I still didn’t know what I was going to do. But I looked down at Bianca’s sleeping face and my heart knew what I wanted.

  “Good morning, Creeper,” Bianca mumbled, rubbing her eyes.

  I laughed. “Good morning, Beautiful.”

  “I caught you staring at me.” She stretched and moved her naked body under the sheets.

  “Can you blame me?”

  She giggled and pulled me into a hug. Her body was warm and soft and I could stay wrapped in her arms for a lifetime.

  Breaking the solitude, she asked, “What time are we meeting Easy and Malik for lunch?”

  “In less than a couple of hours.”

  We lay in bed talking for a while until Bianca convinced me to show her my presentation for my upcoming speaking engagement. I didn’t feel like it was complete and I didn’t want to spend her final hours with me talking about work, but she insisted. And honestly, it was a welcomed distraction from my thoughts.

  Once we finished with the presentation, we showered and dressed for the day. It was bittersweet when Bianca packed her bag. Since we were leaving for the airport after lunch, it didn’t make a lot of sense to come back to the house to get her stuff. Even though we still had a few hours left in her visit, putting her bags in my trunk felt like a punch in the gut. Like every time we prepared to part, we were quiet, reflective before I started my engine.

  Turning the car on and the music up, I drove down my street with Bianca singing and dancing to every song that blasted through the speakers. Every chance I could, I watched her. From her wild, curly hair to her skintight jeans, I couldn’t keep my eyes off of her.

  Absolutely breathtaking.

  “I’m loving this mix! Where did you get this?” Bianca asked as we drove toward the Irish pub where we were having lunch.

  “It’s Easy’s.”

  “You borrowed it from Easy?”

  “No, this is Easy mixing. This is a custom DJ B Easy mix.”

  She nodded. “Wow. Easy is good.”

  We parked and when I met her on the sidewalk, Bianca grabbed my hand, intertwining our fingers.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked, slowing to a stop before we got to the entrance. She turned so that she was directly in front of me, staring up at me through her thick lashes. “You’ve been weird all morning.”

  I’m just losing my fucking mind over this long distance relationship thing. And the fact that I spent all night and morning considering a move to New York. For you. Uprooting my life. For you. Because I love you, I answered, pulling her into me. It was too hard to look into her eyes and hide what I was feeling. She had a way of always seeing right through me.

  I cleared my throat. “Well, I was thinking…” I started hesitantly.

  As if she could hear the uncertainty in my voice, she pulled out of the hug and searched my eyes.

  “I was thinking about what you said last night about the distance.”

  “Oh God… I’m sorry. I wasn’t in the right state of mind,” she giggled. Covering her face with her hands, she shook her head. “You had just made my entire body weak and then I was looking into your gorgeous eyes.”

  Taking my hands into hers, she placed them against her chest. I felt the steady beating of her heart. “I am so crazy in love with you. It doesn’t matter where we are or how far apart we are because how I feel in here is not going to change. In fact, I think the distance makes our relationship even stronger because we are so independent. We have our own thing going on. Maybe being in the same city would stifle our growth and creativity.”

  My heart lurched. I didn’t know what to say. On one hand, I thought she was absolutely right. But on the other hand, it was a blow to my ego that she thought us being together would stifle her creativity.

  For me, being around her would only add to my creative process.

  I hardened my face, trying to keep any emotion from showing as I nodded in agreement.

  An indescribable look flashed across her face as she held my gaze silently for a beat too long. Her head tilted and I could almost see the wheels turning in her head.

  No, she’s right. Maybe the reason it’s always worked with us is because we’ve never been around each other for long stretches of time. She’s right. She’s—

  “Damn B! You’re looking better every time I see you!” Brad announced jokingly, startling us and breaking the moment. “Maybe you should trade that guy in for a newer model.”

  I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms. I will knock him out, I thought, slightly amused.

  Bianca spun around, giving Brad a quick hug. “I don’t have time for your bullshit today, Easy.”

  “Who’s bullshitting? I’m giving you a legitimate offer.”

  “To trade the love of my life for a creeper who smells like sex and cigarettes? No thank you.” Bianca put her arms around me. “I’m good right here.”

  Running my hand down her back and pulling her closer, I dropped a kiss on the top of her head.

  “Are you done?” I asked as we did our handshake with my free hand.

  Brad smiled. “For now. You know I like to get under your skin.” He looked over at Bianca. “Roman doesn’t like it when I flirt with you.”

  “Was that flirting?” Bianca quipped, causing us to laugh.

  I shoved Brad’s shoulder. “And man, don’t hug my girl smelling like whatever you did last night.”

  Brad laughed harder, lifting his shirt to his nose and smelling it. “I took a shower at her house. But I had to throw on the same clothes. Don’t judge me. If I could find the Bianca to my Roman, I’d settle down. Until then, I’m fucking everybody.”

  With our lips curled in disgust, Bianca and I groaned in unison.

  “So you moved the party out here, I see,” Malik called out as h
e walked up.

  “Malik,” I greeted him, going in for our signature handshake.

  As Bianca and Brad greeted Malik, I smiled to myself. The sense of family I thought I had lost eight years ago when I left California for good always came racing back when I was with Bianca, Brad, and Malik. I didn’t realize how much I had missed the security of that until moments when I saw the people I cared about most in one place at one time.

  Grabbing my hand, Bianca pulled me from my thoughts as she started talking.

  “Malik, let me catch you up. Easy is wearing his clothes from last night and he smells like expensive cologne, cigarette smoke, and random ass.”

  “The usual,” Brad interjected as we entered the pub.

  ----------

  Chapter Seven

  TO: Roman

  FROM: Bianca

  SUBJECT: Newest Piece

  I’m in the lobby waiting on Nina to finish with an up and coming sculptor so I can’t talk right now. But I love where you’re going with the dream sequence one. Visually, it’s stunning. The colors are beautiful. The lack of lines and rigidness is inspired. But I don’t feel you in this one. It’s beautiful, yes. But I don’t feel you. And to me, that’s what makes your work so special and turns it into a masterpiece. If you include it tonight, the audience will learn a lot about what art is and what good paintings should look like, but they won’t learn about you and how you make people feel, you know? But seriously, the presentation you showed me on Sunday was perfect. You don’t need to change a thing. We should be out of here in an hour. I hope to catch you before you start your speaking engagement, but just in case, GOOD LUCK! YOU’RE GOING TO BE GREAT! I can’t wait to hear all about it!

  I love you.

  B

  _____

  Finishing the email for the third time, I looked up at the dream sequence painting and smiled. I’d started and stopped so many times due to the frequent trips to New York and then my last trip to California that I never had a chance to connect with it.

  “And this is why I love you, B,” I whispered, analyzing the painting. She was absolutely right. There was no feeling behind it. There was no emotion. The dream sequence was a textbook example of how to paint, but didn’t convey anything. It wasn’t inspired.