Tessa

by Gabelman, Teresa

  “Never thank me.” Jared gave him a rough hug. “We’re family.”

  Adam’s chin trembled, but he appeared to shake off the emotions. “I don’t even know what to do?”

  “I’m sure Tessa does,” Jared said, then glanced at everyone left in the room. “And if not, we will figure it out. You both are not alone, Adam.”

  The door opened and in walked Angelina, who rushed toward Adam, followed by Pam, Nicole, and the rest of the mates.

  Jared made his way out of the room, looking up and down the hallways. A door opened and out walked Tessa. Their eyes met before they headed toward each other. He reached up, touching her cheek.

  “I’m fine,” Tessa lied, even as she flinched from his touch.

  Never one good with words of comfort, Jared pulled her into his arms and held her tightly. “Whatever you need, I’m here.”

  “Just hold me for a minute.” She sighed into his chest.

  “Forever if you need me to,” Jared whispered into the top of her head, and he meant every single word.

  Chapter 13

  It had only been two days since her grandfather had died. The pain was still intense, but as long as she kept herself busy, Tessa was okay. The first two days were pretty easy to do just that with all the phone calls to insurance companies, funeral homes, and all the other tedious things that needed to be done, but today was different. Tonight was the visitation. Since her grandfather’s wishes were to be cremated, they did everything just the way Gramps wanted it. Actually, that wasn’t true. Gramps always teased them, telling them to just dig a hole and dump him in. Tessa smiled at the memory.

  Now, sitting in the office at her desk, she frowned. Jared had stayed with her until this morning. They hadn’t really talked, other than him helping here and there. He was just there for whatever she needed, and it was actually nice. He held her when she broke down, and listened when she and Adam talked about memories from when they were little and up until he got sick. Angelina was there as well with Adam.

  They also went over the will last night, which had been hard. Gramps had left everything, even the house, to them. Nothing was mentioned of his only son. That broke her heart, but not for her father. It broke her heart for Gramps. Adam didn’t want the house. He and Angelina wanted to build, so Tessa promised to buy him out so they could have a good start on a home of their own. The rest they agreed to split evenly.

  Once again, her mind went to Gramps. Even as much as she despised her father, she wished he would have been able to make some kind of peace with Gramps, if that would have been at all possible. With Frank, it may have just been plain impossible. It made her sad. Her grandfather died disappointed in his only son.

  Tessa sighed, then glanced at a file. Grabbing it, she opened it up and stared at Charlie Doe. She had always wanted kids growing up, vowing to find the right man and be the best mom, just like her own mother. Even though they’d had it hard, her mother always made sure Tessa and her brother were taken care of and as happy as they could be, even when their father was a drunken mess.

  Standing, she took the file and headed toward Mitch’s office. Knocking on the door, she waited to be asked inside.

  “Come in.” Mitch’s voice boomed from the other side. “What in the world are you doing here? You have the rest of the week off.”

  “I can’t just sit around.” Tessa frowned, stepping inside. “Everything is taken care of, and well, this helps me more than anything else. Keeps my mind occupied.”

  Mitch nodded in understanding. “Well, you know I won’t complain, but any time you need off, take it.”

  “Thank you.” Tessa smiled, then handed him the file. “What do you know about this little boy? There have been no updates in months, and it looks like the family was ready to adopt, but I can’t find any records other than this file.”

  “Charlie Doe.” Mitch actually smiled, which was a rare occurrence. “Cute kid. Actually, he was adopted by the foster family. His name is Anderson now. I’ll keep this and update it.”

  “Oh, okay,” Tessa replied, feeling such a deep sense of disappointment it took her by surprise.

  Mitch stared at her for a long moment, then nodded toward the door. “Shut the door, Tessa.” Mitch waited for her to shut the door, then pointed to the chair in front of his desk. When she sat down, he continued to look at her. “I’ve seen this look before.”

  “Ah, what look?” Tessa frowned, realizing she may have shown too much of a reaction to hearing that Charlie had been adopted.

  Mitch gave her a smile. “It’s hard not to want to adopt every child who comes through our doors. It’s kind of like going to the pet store and seeing all the puppies.”

  “Ah, are you comparing children with dogs?” Tessa grimaced but didn’t want to admit she understood what he meant.

  “Puppies,” Mitch corrected her. “And no, but the feeling, yes. They are helpless, cute… well, most kids are, some not so much. Now, I’ve never seen an ugly puppy, but that’s not what I’m talking about.”

  “What exactly are you talking about?” Tessa asked, giving him an odd glance.

  “Answer me this honestly.” Mitch cocked his eyebrow at her. “If I would have said Charlie was not adopted, what would have been your feelings on that?”

  “Sad.” Tessa did reply honestly. She would have been sad.

  “Okay, fair enough.” Mitch leaned toward her. “But let’s dig deeper, shall we?”

  “Give it your best shot.” Tessa tilted her head at him.

  Mitch chuckled. “You would have gone back to your office and looked into how to adopt a child.”

  “No.” Tessa shook her head. She had too much shit going on, even as cute and adorable as Charlie was. Something drew her to him, but she wouldn’t be ready to adopt. Plus, she didn’t even know what Jared thought about kids, really. Okay, that thought shocked her. She had no clue where Jared would stand on adoption.

  “Oh, really?” Mitch leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. “Well, I’m going to go ahead and inform you, just in case the need for this information arises. The need for homes is so great that you’d almost be a shoo-in.”

  Tessa had learned a great deal about her position, so this information made her frown. “You mean because I work here, I could skate through what everyone else has to go through to adopt?”

  “No, that’s where the almost comes in. You’d still go through the process, but because I’m me, I could rush it through.” Mitch’s phone rang, but he didn’t make a move to answer it. “Just a FYI, in case you ever thought about it. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to answer this.”

  Standing quickly, Tessa nodded, then headed out of his office a little confused.

  “And Tessa,” Mitch called out. When she turned around, he wasn’t smiling anymore. “I’m really sorry about your loss. I heard he was a good man.”

  “The best,” she replied, with a sad smile. “Thank you.”

  Tessa headed back to her office, her mind going in all different directions. A check of her phone told her she needed to be leaving soon. Stopping just outside her door, she glanced back down the hallway toward Mitch’s office. What had Mitch seen when he told her Charlie had been adopted? Sitting down heavily in her chair, she sighed. She really was disappointed, but that was terrible. She should be happy that cute little face now belonged to a forever home.

  A thought crossed her mind and she gasped in pain. For a split second, she thought of going to talk to Gramps. It was still so raw and almost unreal that she easily forgot he was gone. Grabbing a Kleenex, she dabbed her eyes.

  “Hey.” Jared’s voice had her look at the door. She gasped again, seeing him standing there in a suit. He was so handsome it almost hurt her to look at him.

  “You clean up very well, Mr. Kincaid.” She gave him a sad smile. He didn’t give her any issues when she said she was coming into the office for a while. He even offered to bring her, but she needed time to process things before tonight.

/>   “And you are beautiful as always.” He came toward her, kissing her on the forehead. “Are you ready?”

  “No,” she replied, but stood and grabbed her purse.

  Jared just took her in his arms and held her for a second. Something he had been doing consistently. It felt good, was welcomed, and it was so hard to remain angry with him. The issues were still there, but there seemed to be an understandable pause for the moment. She needed him—strong woman or not. At this moment, she needed his strength and was woman enough to admit it.

  The ride to the funeral home was silent. Jared drove her car and held her hand in his all the way there. Once inside, they were able to spend time alone with Gramps before the funeral director opened the doors for the visitation.

  At the casket, Tessa stood, just staring. “I really needed to talk to you today.” Tessa smiled, then fixed his tie. “I made sure they put you in your favorite suit. You know, your wedding/funeral suit. Adam wanted to buy you a new one, but I remembered you telling me that when you left us to not waste money and that if this suit was good enough for other funerals, it was good enough for yours.”

  Glancing up at the ceiling, Tessa exhaled, then glanced back down. Tears blurred her vision.

  “I really don’t think I can do this without you, Gramps,” Tessa whispered, her hand lightly holding his. “You were my rock. My hero. And now you’re gone.”

  Hearing murmurs behind her, Tessa frowned, not wanting to share her last hours with anyone else, but she knew that wasn’t fair. Putting on a brave face, she moved next to Adam at the top of the casket, steeling herself for what was to come.

  “You think Dad is coming?” Tessa whispered to Adam, her eyes searching around to those who started rolling in.

  Adam chuckled, then shook his head. “I seriously doubt it.”

  “Why is that?” Tessa frowned up at him, but before he could answer, neighbors and old friends of her grandfather’s made their way to the casket to give their respects to Gramps and them.

  Tessa realized quickly as the hour passed, not many have seen her since she had been turned into a vampire. She sensed a nervous distance from many who had known her and Adam their whole lives. Tessa remained polite, smiled, and thanked everyone.

  Jared had repeatedly come to check on her and was always near to bring her water or whatever she needed. Angelina stayed next to Adam the whole time. She appreciated each of their support. The Warriors with their mates were all there which meant the world to both her and Adam. She also knew how much it would have meant to Gramps. When she spotted Charger, he stared at her, then headed her way.

  “I’m sorry for your loss, Tessa.” Charger took her by surprise and gave her a hug, then shook Adam’s hand. “If either of you needs anything, just let me know.”

  “Thank you.” Tessa gave him a wobbly smile, then glanced toward Jared to see him talking to Raven. Her stomach took a dive, her throat tightened, but she looked away. Now wasn’t the time.

  “Tessa.” The familiar voice was welcome. Turning her head, she saw Bobby standing there. “Damn, I’m so sorry. Gramps was one hell of a man.”

  Bobby took her into his arms, and Tessa lost it. Bobby had been in her life for a long time, knew a lot of her past, and even helped out a time or two. Even though they had their issues with the dating thing, Bobby had been a solid in her life.

  “I’m here if you need anything at all.” Bobby pulled away, then glanced over at Jared nervously.

  Tessa wiped her eyes and noticed Jared glaring at him. “Ignore him.” Tessa gave him a small grin. “I’ll protect you. And thank you, Bobby. I’m going to miss him so much.”

  “I know you are.” Bobby hugged her again, surprising Tessa. “He was very special.”

  “Yes, he was,” Tessa agreed, and watched as Bobby disappeared into the growing crowd.

  “Brave man.” Adam snickered in her ear. “If looks could kill, Bobby would be in a casket by Gramps right now.”

  “Yeah, well, Jared can get over it,” Tessa whispered back, “since he’s busy with Raven.”

  “Sis, you’re crazy if you think Jared has something with that chick,” Adam said after shaking hands with a few of Gramps’s old buddies.

  “This isn’t the time or place, Adam. So drop it,” Tessa hissed, but smiled at a few women who gave her a pat as they passed.

  “Actually, Bobby started it,” Adam remarked, then shrugged when she glared up at him. “Well, he did.”

  The preacher approached them. Gramps was a firm believer in the Lord and wanted his preacher to say a few words before they set fire to his ass. Gramps’s exact words.

  “If you and Adam would like to have a seat, we’ll get started.” Preacher McHill smiled gently at Tessa.

  Taking her seat, she glanced at Jared, who stood with the rest of the Warriors. There was a seat for him next to her, but he remained standing. Tessa stared at her grandfather, not really hearing what the preacher was saying as memories of better times assaulted her. In truth, she wanted her own memories and not someone else’s. She actually didn’t realize he was done until Jared walked up in front of the casket.

  “The VC Warriors have a tradition.” Jared began, his eyes falling on Tessa. “When a Warrior goes down, they leave this world with something from each Warrior they were brothers with.”

  Jared cleared his throat as he turned to look at her grandfather. It took him a minute to turn around again to face the crowd.

  “I have only known this man by Gramps. Even though I met him at a time he was unreachable to most, as a vampire, we could communicate. I have never met a more loyal, unselfish human being than this man. Every Warrior in the Cincinnati VC Council has deep respect for Harold J. Pride and would be honored to send him off with a Warrior salute.”

  Tessa watched in awe as each Warrior lined up behind Jared. Jared stood at her grandfather’s side, placed something in the casket then slammed his hand on his chest, his head bowed in respect. He then moved to the side and on it went. Even Charger and the Dark Guardians contributed.

  Adam stood and walked to the casket. He stood silently, his back turned away from everyone. Tessa saw his shoulders shake as he reached into his pocket and placed something inside the casket. He then slammed his fist into his chest as a loud sob escaped his throat. It took him longer to move away, but all the Warriors stared straight ahead, giving him the respect to do what he needed to say his goodbyes.

  Once he was finished, Adam walked back and sat down. His eyes were dry, yet Tessa knew the Warriors gave him time to recover before one by one, they came in front of Tessa and Adam to give their condolences, then knelt at their feet and bowed their head before standing and moving along. Jared was the last to kneel, his head bowed. Slowly, his gaze rose and fell on her, a lone tear escaping his eye as he stood and walked away.

  Tessa’s eyes followed him. She felt his absence as if a part of her was gone. Her stomach clenched and her tears fell harder because she saw his pain. It was her pain reflected in those beautiful golden eyes. He stopped, then turned toward her. His gaze not leaving hers, he let her know he was there for her. It was what she needed so badly, just to know he was there to support her. Not only in Gramps’s death, but in life. Their life. Slowly, she looked away, feeling a small glimmer of hope for them. All too well, she knew hope could be a dangerous illusion.

  Chapter 14

  Tessa stood in the kitchen offering fake smiles as people gave her sad looks, pats on the arm, and condolences. Honestly, she just wanted to be alone, but Gramps would have wanted her to invite everyone back to the house to eat all the food neighbors and friends brought. He believed that wasted food was one of the greatest sins. Glancing at the table full of more food than the table could hold, she sighed.

  “I can’t stop eating.” Steve walked over with a full plate. “This is my third plate. Do all Kentucky women cook this way?”

  After a quick look at Steve, who kept shoveling in the food, she frowned. “Kentucky women?”


  “Yeah, I mean this is a country feast with fried chicken that melts in your mouth, dumplings as fluffy as a cloud, apple pie, cornbread, and hell, I can’t even think straight,” Steve said with his mouth full. “Sid sure could use some lessons.”

  This time Tessa’s smile wasn’t fake. Steve could do that with only a few words. “And I’m sure these country women would love to teach Sid a thing or two about cooking,” Tessa replied, then whispered toward Steve, “You do know we aren’t that far from Cincinnati, right?”

  “By the taste of this food, we are worlds away.” Steve puffed his cheeks out, then shook his head. “I think I’m going to bust.”

  An older woman walked by with a pie and Steve’s eyes followed her.

  Steve’s eyes widened. “Is that pecan freaking pie?”

  Tessa opened her mouth to respond, but Steve was already chasing the woman down. Her gaze met Mira’s, who was smiling as she watched Steve, then looked her way and rolled her eyes. Tessa chuckled, her gaze going to beautiful little Drew in Mira’s arms. Something stirred inside her, both longing and something that felt like regret. The thought surprised her. Even if she were still human, Jared could never give her a child, so why did she feel a tinge of regret?

  Looking away from Drew, she rubbed her tightening throat. It felt like she was suffocating. The house was full of people, and she suddenly needed her space. Slipping out, she went through the screened-in back porch and headed outside. The air was thick and damp with humidity. Peering up, she noticed no stars sparkled in the dark sky. Rain was coming, which fit her mood.

  “Hey.” Nicole walked out and stood beside her, looking up at the sky. “You need anything?”

  Boy, that was a loaded question. “Yeah, I need Gramps back, a healthier relationship, a dad who’s not a drunk asshole who wanted to abort me and….”

  Nicole had looked from the sky to her. “And?”

  “A baby,” Tessa said, as she stared straight at Nicole and then laughed almost hysterically. “And how fucked up is that?”