Avoiding the Badge

by Dorothy F. Shaw

  Drawing in a deep breath, Rayna shoved the pit in her stomach aside and got her head in the game. “Okay, Axle. Easy now.” She smoothed the fur on his face and then over his ear. “It’s okay, good boy.”

  Rayna looked at her staff, and Andrea caught her gaze and started prepping Axle’s front limb for an IV. Rayna smoothed her hand over the dog’s shoulder. “Is there an exit wound?”

  “Not that I can find yet.” Patrick moved to assist Andrea.

  “Keep looking.” Rayna snapped on a pair of exam gloves and pressed the end of her stethoscope to the dog’s chest, listening for equal breath sounds. Axle sounded good, and his vitals were good, too. He was alert, and of course panting, likely still full of adrenaline. His temperature was elevated, which was to be expected since he’d suffered a trauma.

  She had no clue if the bullet had ripped through the animal’s chest, tearing into vital organs or not. And since they’d not found an exit wound, there was a good chance the bullet was lodged inside him still.

  Andrea finished the IV and hung the bag. “What do you want to do first?”

  “He’s stable, so—” She blinked and stared down at Axle. Rayna’s first instinct was to sedate him and perform surgery, but she didn’t want to jump to any conclusions. She needed to stay level-headed. Calm. Decisive. “Okay, let’s clip and clean the area. Need to get a better look at the wound before we do anything else.”

  Andrea moved, getting the clippers, and handed them to Rayna. After turning the device on, Rayna began shaving Axle’s thick fur. “Andrea, no pain meds yet, right?”

  “Not yet.”

  Rayna blinked. “Right. Two of hydromorphone IV.”

  “Yes, Doctor.”

  Once Andrea had administered the pain meds via intravenous, Rayna leaned over him and inspected the wound. The flesh was lacerated, but there appeared to be no penetrating entrance wound. Thank heavens! “Get me some lidocaine, please.” Yes, the pain meds Axle now had on board had relaxed him considerably, but before she probed the tender area, she wanted to numb him there directly.

  Gina returned with a needle, and Rayna took it from her. “Hold his head please. He should be fine, but just in case, I don’t want him to snap or have to muzzle him.”

  Gina nodded and moved into position to hold the dog. When the tech was ready, Rayna injected a small amount of lidocaine around the wound.

  Axle lay still the whole time, barely moved a muscle. Rayna set the needle aside and bent toward his ear. “Good boy.” She pressed her nose to the top of his head. “Such a good boy. You hold still for me, okay?”

  Rayna straightened and slowly examined the wound. She traced the deep groove of the laceration, and then pressed gently. Amazing. There was no entrance wound from the bullet, just a flesh wound. A deep one, but still, no entrance. “From what I can see, we’ve got a flesh wound only.” She tipped her head in the other direction. “Patrick, pull that light closer for me?” He did, and Rayna looked closer. “Yes, flesh wound only. He’s going to be fine. Get me a suture kit.”

  “Thank God!” Andrea shook her head and smiled.

  Relief blasted through Rayna, and she wiped her forehead with the back of her hand. Without allowing herself a moment to think past the task in front of her, she grabbed the surgical instruments and then with the help of her staff, got to work on taking care of Axle’s wound.

  Only when she was done would she allow herself to think about why Derek wasn’t there with his dog.

  And based on that, what her next action would be.

  Chapter 28

  Agitation and impatience flowed through Derek’s veins as he checked his text messages again. He’d been stuck in the ER for far too long and hadn’t heard a damn thing from Jeff. They needed to discharge him already.

  Yes, there was a bullet wound—technically two wounds, an entrance and an exit—in the side of his neck, a mere few inches to the left of his throat. Which meant he’d be fine. Truly. The damn thing didn’t hit anything important, and no vital arteries.

  Nothing major was bleeding. So, far as he was concerned, he was good to go. Frankly, he needed to get the fuck out of there so he could find out if Axle was okay too. If Jeff would only text him back, then maybe he’d feel better chilling a little longer and letting the doc stitch him up. If that’s what they wanted to do.

  Doc...

  Derek’s head fell back against the pillow. Christ, he missed her. Had Jeff brought Axle to Rayna to be taken care of like Derek had told him to do? He hoped so.

  Rayna would take the best care of Axle, and because Axle knew her, he’d be a better patient, too. But either way, Derek knew that she would do everything within her power to ensure his partner was okay. Fucking hell, why hadn’t his best friend checked in yet?

  In the back of his mind, Derek knew that Axle was okay. He had to be. There was a lot of blood, which had scared the shit out of Derek, but judging by how Axle was acting, the injury was likely minor.

  Then again, there was a lot to be said for adrenaline. Hell, Derek had known he’d been shot, but he hadn’t felt it. Not until the situation had come to an end and Jeff offered to take Axle to get seen.

  No one was dead. Not even the perpetrator. Which was good, because now the asshole would pay for his crime and spend some time behind bars. According to what one of the other officers told Derek, the dude was well familiar with Arizona jails. Apparently, the guy had a warrant for his arrest, which was why he’d run when he saw Derek in the first place.

  Derek cleared his throat and stared at the curtain blocking his view from the rest of the people in the ER. Shame though, Derek would’ve liked to land a few punches on the dude’s face, but it was too late for that now.

  Shit, it was too late for a lot of things.

  Like him and Rayna.

  * * * *

  Rayna pulled off her gloves, tossing them in the trash, and then walked down the short hallway leading to the lobby of her clinic. Coming to the opening, she scanned the seating area and found Jeff kicked back, feet crossed at the ankle.

  Good grief, in uniform, with all his gear on, the guy looked like he was a well-honed machine, all calm, cool, and collected. Probably bossy for sure, but a far cry from the “goofy asshole” Tish liked to refer to him as. Not that Rayna ever agreed with Tish’s assessment of the man. Still, he definitely appeared different in uniform, that much Rayna could tell.

  Drawing in a breath, she twisted her hands in front of her and dragged her teeth over her bottom lip. She was stalling, distracting herself with mindless thoughts, while another part of her stayed suspended, caught somewhere in a web of utter and total fear. Forcing herself into action, she moved to the edge of the counter. “Where is he?”

  Jeff got to his feet. “Banner Desert. He’s g—”

  That was all she needed to hear. Without another thought, Rayna pivoted and took off for her office. She heard Jeff yelling her name, but she ignored him, grabbed her purse and ran out the back door of the clinic and to her car.

  It was nearly four p.m., and rush hour traffic had already begun. But Rayna wasn’t about to let that slow her down, or stop her. She cut through a variety of neighborhoods, inching around the traffic in order to get to the hospital as fast as she could. The drive only took her twenty minutes, but it felt more like an hour.

  After she pulled in and found a place to park, Rayna turned off the engine and sat in her car. With her hands locked onto her steering wheel, she stared straight ahead, wondering what the heck she was going to say to him.

  What if he didn’t want to see her?

  What if...he hated her now?

  Rayna leaned forward and pressed her forehead to the steering wheel. She couldn’t bear it if Derek hated her. “A ton of education, but I’m still an idiot!”

  She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to force the tears back. Rayna had worked so hard for her d
reams, and she’d accomplished them all. However, the dream she’d never allowed herself to entertain, or even acknowledge existed, was one of a man who’d love her from head to toe and down to her soul.

  Derek was that man.

  Rayna straightened and wiped her eyes. Now she wanted that dream. More than she’d ever wanted anything in her life. And when she had a dream, nothing stood in her way from achieving it.

  If he didn’t want to see her, she’d just have to find a way to make him see the situation how she saw it. If Derek hated her, then she’d have to make him love her again. Simple as that—though she knew it wouldn’t be easy.

  Opening her car door, Rayna stepped out and walked into the ER entrance. She approached the admitting window. “Hello—” She waited for the young woman at the counter to look up at her. Rayna smiled. “I need to see Derek Hansen? Officer Hansen. He was brought in a short time ago, I believe.”

  “One second.” The woman typed on her computer and then glanced back up at Rayna. “Are you his wife? We tried to reach you when he first arrived, but it seems your phone number is no longer valid.”

  Rayna jerked her chin back, unsure how to handle how that question made her feel. Plus, the fact that the woman had to be talking about Stephanie brought on a whole lot of feelings she couldn’t sort through. Oh dear. “No, uh, no. I’m his...um, I’m just a friend.”

  “Ah, sorry, I just assumed.”

  Rayna drew in a deep breath. “Is he okay? Am I able to go see him?”

  “I’m sorry, since you’re not his spouse or a relative, I can’t let you back there or give you any information. But you can have a seat, if you like, and I’ll let you know if I get authorization to let non-family members back there.”

  Since you’re not his spouse...

  Good grief, that cut deep.

  Razor-sharp heartache filled her chest, and it was all she could do not to clutch at her shirt. Rayna wanted to be the one listed in his file as his emergency contact, and she wanted to be able to say, yes, of course I’m his wife. For Pete’s sake, that would be the best thing in the world!

  Feeling like she was on autopilot, Rayna nodded and backed away from the window, finding a seat in the corner. There was no way to know if he was critically injured, and the thoughts racing through her mind did nothing but inspire more fear.

  Was he stable? Was he fighting for his life? Rayna bit her bottom lip. What if... God what if he died? No! God no! That was not happening. Bending forward, she buried her face in her hands. Not knowing what was actually happening was going to drive her mad. The only thing Rayna did know was that she couldn’t leave. She’d have to just find a way to cope until someone, anyone, filled her in.

  “Girlfriend, are you always this dramatic? For realsies, I thought Derek said you were the epitome of calm, cool, collected, and all that jazz.”

  Rayna couldn’t help but smile at the smart-aleck comments Jeff had just made. Of course, getting her to smile was probably his intent all along. Obviously he’d left her clinic after she did and was now here to save her from her voluntary pit of despair. Bless his heart, the man was an angel, and Tish was crazy for not seeing that.

  Dropping her hands, she glanced up at him and blew out a harsh breath. “No, I’m never this dramatic. Derek was right, I am the epitome of calm, cool, and collected. Not sure about all the jazz, but I think this warrants just a teensy bit of hysteria. Don’t you?”

  Jeff frowned and tilted his head to the side. “Psshaw, whatever. Maybe if he were dying, but it’s just a flesh wound.”

  Huh? Rayna stared up at him trying to understand how on earth they were clearly not having the same conversation. “I’m talking about Derek, not the dog, Jeff.”

  He nodded and pursed his lips. “Mmhmm. Yeah, look, don’t say I said so, but once upon a time, those two terms were interchangeable. For realsies.” He winked. “Anyway, in this case, I was actually talking about Derek, not the dog. Which, by the way, nice work on the stitches. Seeing as though you ran off all half-hysterical female, I left Axle in the care of your staff. Easier for me to now tend to you.”

  “Uh, thanks?” She shook her head, trying to sift through all that had just come out of Jeff’s mouth. How on earth did he think he was going to tend to her? Ugh, Rayna wasn’t sure she had the emotional capacity to go on the journey of deciphering that particular riddle. “Flesh wound?”

  Jeff shrugged. “Okay, it’s a little more than a flesh wound. But nothing major was hit as the bullet passed in and then out of his neck. Clean exit.”

  Rayna jumped to her feet and grabbed Jeff’s shirt. “His neck?”

  “Rayna, breathe, okay?” He rubbed her arms. “I already said he’s fine.”

  She shook her head, fear still burning hot in her gut. “No, no you didn’t.”

  Jeff frowned. “I didn’t? Huh. Well, let’s go see him.”

  He started to step away, and Rayna tugged on his arm, stopping him. “I can’t. I’m not family.”

  He frowned at her. Again. “Girlfriend, you’re his girlfriend. That’s family in my book.”

  This time, Rayna let him lead her toward the check-in window. “Okay, but I bet they won’t care what your book says.”

  He glanced over his shoulder at her. “Shh. I got this.”

  “Okay.” Rayna shrugged and figured it was either going to work and she’d see Derek, or she’d have to wait. Either way, she still wasn’t leaving. So Jeff could work any sort of magic he thought he had. Okay, yes, maybe he was a tad bossy like Tish thought.

  “Hi there, sweetheart. I’m Officer Jeff Pearl.”

  Rayna could see from his profile that he’d pasted on a devilish “I know I’m good-looking” smile, and she rolled her eyes. Jeff was too much, but that was why she liked him.

  Not missing a beat, he went on. “We’re here to see Officer Derek Hansen.” He tugged Rayna forward, and then raised the hand he held hers with in the air. “This is Doctor Rayna Michaels. She’s Officer Hansen’s girlfriend. Can you buzz us in, please?”

  The young woman’s eyes were wide, but a smile tugged at the corner of her lips. “Of course, Officer. Doctor.” She nodded at each of them. “I hadn’t realized. Go right in. He’s in exam room twelve.”

  “Thank you, darling.” Jeff smiled.

  “If you need anything else, feel free to let me know. I’ll be here for the next few hours.”

  “Much appreciated. If I can think of any need I have, I’ll be sure to let you know.”

  Good grief, really? This time it was Rayna’s turn to tug on his hand. “Can we go in now, and maybe you flirt later?”

  “I’m not flirting. I’m persuading in order to get what we need.”

  Rayna rolled her eyes and couldn’t help but let out a small laugh. “Whatever, Romeo. Can we go?”

  “Yes, Doctor Ginger...stealer of souls.” He winked before he turned and led them through the now open door to the ER bay.

  “Stealer of souls?” Rayna frowned. What a terrible thing to say. Why would Jeff say that? Did he think that she was some sort of crazy or mean person? Without warning Rayna bumped into the back of Jeff. “Geez, what’s up? Why are you stopping?”

  “My work is done here.”

  “Huh?”

  He jerked his chin up. “We’re at our destination.”

  Rayna looked up where he had indicated, to see the sign with the big number twelve on it. Wow. She glanced back to Jeff. She hadn’t even had time to think about what she was going to say, or do, or…anything. He distracted her with his comments, and… Rayna threw her arms around his neck and hugged him. “Thank you.”

  “Anytime, hon. Now get in there and make this right.”

  “Yes, sir.” She kissed his cheek and stepped away.

  Standing in front of the closed curtain, she drew in a breath and slowly released it. After another moment, she p
ulled the fabric aside and caught Derek’s gaze across the room.

  Rayna’s heart thundered in her chest.

  His eyes were as wide as saucers as he looked back at her.

  There were no words…not yet.

  Instead, they simply stared at each other for what felt like forever. Seeing him again, although she’d have preferred it be under different circumstances, was something she never thought would happen.

  Gratitude spilled through her, filling cracks Rayna had been living with for six weeks. Gratitude that he was alive, and that she might now have a chance to make things right. She’d take it—the opportunity—the one and only chance she might get.

  And pray she could make something from it.

  * * * *

  “Holy shit, please tell me Axle is okay?” Terror sped through Derek, making his heart race. It’d taken him a minute or four to get his brain back online after seeing the love of his life standing before him, and then he realized the only reason she would be here was because something must be seriously wrong with his partner.

  “Oh!” She raised her hands. “No, Axle is fine. He’s totally fine. Just a flesh wound, and he’s all stitched up.”

  Relief chased the terror away, and Derek let out a gush of air as his head fell back on the pillow. Fuck, he was tired. “Thank God. Jesus, thank you, Rayna. Seriously, Doc. Thank you.”

  “No need for thanks.” She waved a hand at him and shook her head. Another moment passed, and she glanced down at her shoes, then back to his eyes. “Is it—” She crossed her arms. “Is it okay if I come in and talk to you for a minute?”

  Derek raised his head off the pillow and took her in. As always, her natural beauty and the sincerity in her eyes made his heart melt in his chest. If the woman wanted to talk, then he’d give her that. Hell, Derek would give her anything. “Of course it’s okay.”

  “Thanks.” Stepping into the small space, she closed the curtain behind her and moved to the foot of his gurney. After drawing in a deep breath, she nodded. “Thanks.”