The Thing About Love... (The Thing About... #1)

by J. M. Raphaelle

  Even Rob is busy, helping Marie's dad, Eddie, stock the outdoor bar with an assortment of liquor, juices, beer, and ice to keep us cocktail-happy throughout the night.

  The Albas' home is a three-bedroom ranch style house. The kitchen-dining-living room area is one open space, which makes the home seem larger. The living room faces a large patio area that features a pool, a couple of trees and a lounging area with large, plush sofas.

  Dinner will happen inside, but after-midnight cocktails and the gift exchange will most certainly be outside by the pool. Thankfully, the night should provide a break from this intense heat.

  The Albas have invited several of their friends to join us, mostly couples whose children are not coming home for Christmas. We're expecting a long, cheerful night.

  "I'm so glad you made it down. I was afraid you'd decide to stay in LA," says Sofia, as we're helping to set the dining room table.

  "We'd never do that, mom," counters Marie.

  "Honey, you know we support whatever you do. We don't want to impose. You girls are young and have a lot of living to do. By the way, Ellie, how's Mike?"

  Marie glowers at her.

  "Oh, did I say something wrong?" she asks, concerned she just put her foot in her mouth.

  "No, not at all. Mike and I aren't seeing each other anymore," I explain, trying not to make a big deal out of this news.

  "Oh, honey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you sad," she responds.

  "You didn't make me sad, Sofie," I reply with a soft smile.

  I've called her Sofie since I first met her at age 5. When I respectfully called her Mrs. Alba, she responded gingerly, "How polite, sweet, sweet girl. Call me Sofie."

  "My mom asked about him too, when we FaceTimed earlier. I should've disclosed that information before, but it's old news, and it just slipped my mind," I say casually, hoping this will end all conversations about Mike.

  "I remember how hard a breakup can be," Sofie tries to console me.

  "Mom!" Marie stares daggers at her.

  "I'm just saying I was once young too, and I did date other men before your dad," she continues, despite Marie's glare.

  "Mom, stop!" Marie is mortified at her mom's candid observations.

  I smile at their exchange. They're so much alike, even if Marie doesn't want to admit it.

  "Sweetheart, did Sara and Mateo get the gifts we sent?" Sofie asks me.

  "Yes, and they asked me to thank you very much. I told them you had received theirs. They're very grateful I'm spending Christmas with you," I reply with a smile.

  "We wouldn't have it any other way. We love you like a daughter."

  Her kind words get to me, and I'm starting to tear up with nostalgia of home. I do miss mom and dad.

  Eddie notices and suggests a toast. He quickly fills some glasses with wine and hands them to us. "Here's to always enjoying a great Christmas Eve with family and friends. Salud!"

  We all click glasses, and he gives me a kind smile and a wink.

  ●●●

  I'm staring at the ceiling unable to sleep. I'm in a food coma from the excessive amount of food and drinks I've consumed. Christmas is one of the holidays I consider free-zones, meaning no worrying about counting calories or carbs.

  It was a marvelous night, with lovely older people giving us young ones a lot of advice. Not too long ago, I would've dismissed their words, but today, I was taking notes, especially when sweet Alice came up with things like, "Life's too short to sit around crying over spilled milk. Pick up the glass, clean up the spill, and get yourself another serving."

  Hear, hear Alice!

  I'm cleaning up my messy past, and Jack is helping me.

  "Jack," I sigh his name quietly, smiling remembering his text exactly at midnight.

  Jack: Merry Christmas baby. I miss you really miss you! I owe you so many kisses!

  I close my eyes and fall asleep content.

  Mike is holding me with one arm around my waist, as we dance at the New Year's party. It's an upbeat song we both love, and he's holding me tightly.

  He's so cocky, and I'm bewitched. He rules his world, and I can't get enough.

  "Happy New Year!" we hear people scream above the music.

  We stop dancing, and he presses me into him with both arms.

  "Happy New Year," I whisper in his ear, and he rewards me with a radiant smile.

  "Happy 2012," he says and kisses me on the lips.

  "Happy 2013," I say and kiss him back, because I'm hoping to spend many New Year's to come with him.

  "Happy 2014," he replies following my lead, and we kiss again.

  "Happy 2015," we say in unison smiling, and we kiss one more time.

  I'm starting 2012 with this hot guy, and I'm the happiest girl here.

  "Shit!" I wake with a start, my heart pounding out of my chest. I'm sweating, literally sweating, and the AC is on full blast.

  "Ellie, are you okay?" Marie asks half asleep.

  I've woken her up. We're sharing sleeping quarters, so Rob could take the spare bedroom.

  I sit up on the guest bed, rub my face, and fan my cami. "I was dreaming. Sorry I woke you."

  Marie sits up as well, "A nightmare?"

  "Yes…no. I was dreaming of Mike, when we first hooked up, New Year's 2012. We kissed each other once for every New Year up to 2015. I don't know why we stopped there."

  "Why are you dreaming with Mike?"

  "No idea. I was thinking of Jack when I fell asleep."

  "Don't read too much into it. Don't let it mess with your psyche. Go back to sleep, dream of Jack," she yawns, lies back on the bed, and quickly falls back to sleep.

  I close my eyes intent on dreaming of Jack, but it's Mike who invades my subconscious again.

  "I mean look at you, such a beautiful girl next to me. How did I get you?" He's examining me with reverence.

  We're sitting in his car, outside a restaurant where we just had dinner. He's extra attentive tonight, and I'm giddy.

  "Muah!" he kisses me loudly on my ear, making me squeal like a little girl.

  "What's that for?" I giggle.

  "Just because," he gazes into my eyes, grinning. "One day, when we get married," he proceeds, and my world stops.

  "Yes?" I say, with a coy smile.

  "One day, in about five years or so, we'll get married, and it's going to be fantastic!"

  Hearing those words come out of his lovely mouth makes my heart swell so much, it almost hurts.

  "What the hell!" I mumble to myself, as I wake up again, startled by my irreverent dreams.

  I'm careful not to wake Marie again and head to the kitchen for a glass of water. The house is quiet and dark, so I use the light from my iPhone to guide my steps.

  The ice-cold water cools me off and helps bring my heart rate down.

  I'm so tired, but I don't want to go back to sleep, back to dreaming of Mike. I contemplate heading to the patio and staring up at the stars until morning comes. I decide against it, because I'll end up scrutinizing those troubling dreams, and I'll look miserable in the morning.

  I head back to the bedroom, pondering if Jack is sleeping soundly, maybe dreaming of me.

  I could only hope.

  After what seems like hours, I fall back into a dreamless sleep.

  CHAPTER 17

  WE SAY OUR goodbyes to Marie's parents and begin our drive back to LA. Rob is behind the wheel again, and I'm riding shotgun this time. But I'm pensive, and Rob can't take my silence anymore.

  "I need a talker next to me when I drive, Ellie, a distraction to keep me awake. It's a long, lonely drive so entertain me, or I'm going to wake up Marie and send you to the back seat."

  "Geez, Robby Dovey, take it down a notch," I tickle him, and he chuckles.

  "Fine," he grins lovingly.

  He can never stay mad at me.

  "But spill it. What are you so preoccupied with?"

  I tell him about
my dreams, and how I woke up bewildered. I don't want to obsess about the past anymore, but those dreams were so vivid.

  Rob hears me out as I'm going in circles, questioning everything, my mood, my actions, my wants, my fears, and doubts. It seems hours pass, and I'm still rehashing the same subjects.

  "Rob, aren't you going to say anything?"

  "No, Ellie," he replies sternly. "You already know the answer to every single question and doubt. People change, things change, and Mike didn't choose you. I'm here for you, to listen all day and all night, at least until I leave. So talk as much as you want. I will listen, because I love you. I can do that for you, but don't expect me to help you rationalize why you should go back to being hung up on Mike. I mean, who gets lucky enough to stumble onto someone like Jack? Only you, Ellie, and that's because despite your lapse in judgment with Mike, you are a loving, wonderful person, and you deserve a 'Jack.' So stop with Mike already. For fuck's sake, get out of your own way, Ellie. Please!"

  I stare out the window and muse. He's right. Dreams are just old memories. Mike is out of my life, as it should be. Jack is my present. He's shown me another side of love.

  Do I want to risk that? Of course not!

  "I'm not stuck on Mike, and I'm not choosing him," I defend myself, without looking at him. "I was just sharing, but I'm done."

  He grabs my hand in kisses it, as if saying he's sorry for being so harsh. He pulls at it several times, until I turn to look at him.

  "I'm sorry, I love you," he mouths and kisses my hand again.

  I smile and turn on the radio. I close my eyes, rest my head on the headrest, and take in the lyrics of the song that's playing, "Stressed Out" by Twenty One Pilots.

  I hear Marie softly humming the song from the back seat, making me smile again.

  Rob doesn't let go of my hand for hours.

  ●●●

  Rob is back in New York. We welcomed 2016 at a VIP event hosted by one of his friends. While it was the most fun I've had in a long time, I was wishing Jack was with me.

  By the time we arrived back in LA from Phoenix, he had already left for San Francisco. What comforts me is our constant communication. He texts me these little sweet nuggets of affection that always put a smile on my face and make me feel special.

  Jack: Wish you were here

  Jack: I'm dying to kiss you

  Jack: Thinking of you baby your soft skin your lips

  Jack: I can't wait to see you and kiss you

  Jack: You were in my dreams last night. I miss you

  Jack: can't wait to give you these in person

  And his text exactly at midnight was the perfect way to ring in the New Year.

  Jack: Happy 2016 baby I wish you were here to welcome the year together. Miss you!

  But I haven't seen him, and it's mid-January. Unexpectedly, I've been incredibly busy at the record label. We have multiple projects to be released before the end of the first quarter, and I've been working longer hours. I'm more than willing, because it increases my pay, and the experience I'm gaining is invaluable. But I get home so late, and I'm frustrated that Jack and I haven't been able to coordinate a night to see each other.

  I'm also wondering if he's seeing someone else. Marie never found out if he is dating someone. Sam isn't forthcoming with any information, as much as Marie has insisted. I almost don't care, because we're just beginning a friendship that I'm hoping will lead to a real relationship. We're not there yet, so I don't have a right to question him.

  I'm single, that's very clear to him. If he wants to be with me, he will have to cut ties with whomever he's dating. That's on him.

  And thanks to my lucky stars, today I don't have much time to spend mulling over it. I'm preoccupied preparing for a follow up interview I have tomorrow for the editor position I'm going after.

  Jack knows about it and is just as supportive and reassuring as I expected.

  Jack: Good luck with your interview tomorrow baby

  Ellie: Thank you!

  Jack: You got this

  Ellie: I hope so

  Jack: Know so

  Ellie: Yes

  Jack: Do you miss me?

  Ellie: No

  Jack:

  Ellie: Do you miss me?

  Jack: Yes

  Ellie: That's all that matters!

  Jack: Funny!

  Ellie: I miss you so much…

  Jack: I need those kisses in person

  Ellie: Come get them

  Jack: Don't tempt me cause I will

  Ellie: I want you to

  Jack: Ellie…

  Ellie: Jack…

  Jack: I'll drop everything and go!

  Ellie: Taking a day off, are you?

  Jack: LOL! I'm in the middle of negotiating a deal

  Ellie: Big shot! What are you doing texting me?

  Jack: I always have time for you

  Ellie: I should let you go

  Jack: No. I'll leave and go see you

  Ellie: You can't but I love that you want to

  Jack: For you I can and I will

  Ellie: You're so damn cute

  Jack: Am I?

  Ellie: Damn right!

  Jack: LOL! You're pretty hot yourself

  Ellie: Am I?

  Jack: LOL! Can't wait to touch you again

  Ellie: Me too!

  Jack: Then let me come to you

  Ellie: I'm aching to see you but you're in the middle of something important

  Jack: I'd drop everything to see you

  Ellie: I know and you have no idea how much that makes me happy

  Jack: Mmm yummy kisses

  Ellie: Thank you for your support for always cheering me on

  Ellie: Now kick some business ass! xoxo

  Jack: You got it baby! xoxo

  Geez, this man is incredible! What planet did he come from? We, earthly women, need more like him.

  CHAPTER 18

  MARIE GOT A promotion. It's quite an accomplishment. She's been at the ad agency just over a year and has proven herself invaluable. Being bilingual, she's the agency's most valuable asset.

  We're throwing a backyard party this weekend to celebrate her much deserved good fortune and the fact that my job interview went really well. We've done these shindigs often enough to know exactly what we need to transform the backyard into an LA hotspot within a matter of days.

  Sam is helping, of course. He's our designated gofer and handy man to set the patio space to our standards. He's helping us set up the high cocktail tables and chairs we rented, and hang the suspended lights that stretch from one side of the backyard to the other.

  Jack offered to help as well, but I turned him down. He's tied up with the opening of two more coffee shops. He's overworked as it is, and I don't want to distract him. He didn't sound too pleased when I rejected his offer, but I know deep inside he's grateful I took his needs into consideration.

  We've also hired a bartender for the night. And thanks to Sam, who works for a beer distributer, all the beer is on him. We've also bought an impressive assortment of liquor and plenty of appetizers to feed our guests. Tony, Marie's buddy from the ad agency, has mad music mixing skills and has offered to DJ.

  ●●●

  The e-vite went out a few days ago, and we're expecting a very large turnout.

  We want everyone to get home safely and have posted an Uber reminder on the bathroom door, with a warning that we reserve the right to hide car keys if anyone insists on driving home drunk. A warning is a warning!

  By 8:00 p.m., almost everyone has arrived, and the party is on!

  I'm holding a bottle of tequila that I'm taking to the bartender, when I turn and see Mike walking in with four of his friends, including Mario.

  What is HE doing here?

  I start to panic and look everywhere for Marie to ask her who invited him. I can't find her, but I'm sure she knows why he's here.

  He fi
nds the perfect spot at the entrance of the patio, where he can be as far away from me as possible.

  Of course.

  He's in my house — for all intents and purposes it is my house — and he still won't even say hello.

  He's such an ass, as Rob would say.

  I finally see Marie standing by the back entrance to the kitchen.

  "You're going to drink that by yourself, muñe?" she teases.

  Shit, I'm still holding the bottle of tequila.

  I drag her inside the kitchen, where Mike can't see us, and begin to drill her.

  "Eh, I invited him. Sorry! Sam kind of mentioned it to him, and he technically is still a friend. I felt obligated," she puts her hands together in prayer in front of her face, hoping I won't be too peeved.

  "Well, he didn't even bother to say hello, and I'm one of the hosts. Whatever!" I walk away a bit annoyed, though not at Marie but at myself.

  Despite his belligerence, seeing him stirs something inside me. It's something that scares me. He's the ultimate reminder of the pain I've gone through and of how shattered my heart was.

  It disturbs my peace of mind.

  I'm now anxious at my own party.

  I head to the bar and drop off the bottle of tequila I've been holding.

  I see Mike again. He's still hanging around the same spot, near the door that leads to the street.

  Of course he loiters near the closest possible exit.

  He also has an incredible vantage point, and can see me perfectly no matter where I walk to or stand. It's unnerving. I can feel his eyes following me, and I find myself looking back at him.

  Damn!

  I'm greeting a couple of the guests that just arrived, when I'm suddenly startled by someone's arm wrapping around my waist from behind.

  I turn slightly and see Jack sweetly smiling at me. But instead of throwing my arms around him, like I've been aching to do, I unwrap myself from his embrace and harshly step away frowning at him, as if he's a stranger who has no right to touch me.

  He glares at me bewildered and confused.

  What have I done!

  I want to hold him, tell him I'm sorry, but I'm paralyzed. His wounded eyes halt me in place. He's been rejected and dismissed…by me!