Her first few lessons are productive, even enjoyable. Now that Abbey has settled into her routine and caught up with the work she has missed, she finds that she is very much on top of her A-Level courses. She knows and likes all of her teacher’s and has even started talking quite regularly with a few people in each of her classes. Still only polite conversation, but it is better than nothing. The horror of her first week is waning slightly, and although she is a long way off from liking Eden Comprehensive, it is starting to become more tolerable. It is these positive changes that make Abbey all the more determined to finally venture out of her self-imposed, solitary confinement.
Her class is one of the first to be dismissed for lunch, which she is thankful for. It means that she can beat the rush and discreetly find a seat before the crowds descend. She walks quickly outside, across the courtyard and over to the picnic tables opposite the cafeteria. She chooses the table furthest away from the building and sits down. Her new found bravery has definitely affected her appetite and she doesn’t feel much like eating, so instead she pulls out the book that her class are studying in English and makes notes in the margin as she reads. It doesn’t take long before the picnic tables and the surrounding fields are full of students and Abbey finds herself distracted, watching the various people come and go. Some she recognizes, a lot she doesn’t.
Not thinking about anything in particular as she idly scans the courtyard; her thoughts are suddenly pulled into sharp focus as she makes eye contact with someone. Abbey turns cold and her stomach drops, when she realizes Natalie Alder is staring over in her direction. She is stood in the centre of a group of people on the other side of the lawn and they are clearly talking about her, laughing and pointing in the most obvious way imaginable. Abbey can feel her breath quickening. If she gets up and walks away now, will they follow her? But what if she stays and they come over to her table? The complete humiliation she suffered on her first day would feel like nothing if she is ridiculed in front of this many people; she will be the talk of the school. Abbey begins to panic. Any minute now Natalie will make her move and it will be too late to escape, too embarrassing for her to just turn and run away. ‘Why the hell didn’t I stay inside?’ she scolds herself.
Concentrating on her book, Abbey tries hard to ignore the group of bullies and Natalie in particular. If she keeps her head down and doesn’t acknowledge them, maybe they will get bored and let it go? Abbey’s good mood from this morning has all but vanished and she counts down the seconds, praying for the bell to ring so that she can escape this horrible girl who for some unknown reason has it in for her. But there is half an hour left until the end of lunch break, half an hour to endure the dreaded possibility that at any moment she might find herself in another frightening confrontation. Abbey can sense someone approaching her table and her heart beats fast as her breath quickens even more.
“Abbey, hi…” The voice is friendly- not the one Abbey is expecting – and she glances up cautiously to see Lucy standing in front of her table, thankfully blocking Natalie from view. The two boys who interrupted their first meeting are standing behind her.
“Hi Lucy, how are you?” Abbey tries to compose herself, speaking as calmly as possible.
“Great! Do you mind if we sit?”
“No go ahead…”
“This is Liam and my boyfriend Nathan…” The three of them join Abbey at the table and she waves timidly in response. Liam is good looking in an unconventional way, fairly small, but lean, with short dark hair, a slightly crooked smile and an air of confidence about him. Abbey is obviously assessing him a little too closely as he catches her staring and winks, laughing under his breath.
The other boy, Nathan, is good looking in a very conventional way. He is tall and slim, quite muscular, with messy brown hair that sticks out at every angle. He seems a strange match for Lucy, given that his uniform is almost pristine. They are both equally attractive but look like polar opposites in terms of presentation, yet he sits with his arm draped protectively across her shoulders, obviously smitten, as he smiles warmly at Abbey.
“So, how have you been? Has this place got any more bearable yet?” Lucy asks.
“I’m not sure… it was starting to…”
“What changed?”
Abbey sighs and looks directly over Lucy’s shoulder. The three of them all follow her gaze over to Natalie’s table, where she is sat looking less than impressed that her intended target suddenly has allies.
“Jesus Christ, Natalie Alder is giving you grief already? She doesn’t waste any fucking time does she?!” Liam rolls his eyes with a look of irritation on his face.
“We met on my first day, it was definitely an experience. She slammed me into the lockers…”
“Seriously…?”
“Yeah, Lucy came to my rescue…” Abbey smiles, gratefully.
“I wouldn’t say that. I saw the aftermath…”
“Still, I never said thank you…”
“Don’t mention it…”
Abbey starts to relax as the four of them chat together in the blazing sunshine and she listens intently as Liam recalls numerous horror stories of Natalie and some of her poor unsuspecting victims. By the sounds of it, she got off lightly. It does make her worry even more though, knowing what Natalie is capable of.
The half an hour that Abbey had at first been wishing away, comes to an end all too soon. It has been so nice talking to people her own age without the shadow of her past hanging over her. She hadn’t realized until now how much she has missed this sort of interaction. She has clearly gotten too used to being on her own.
The courtyard is almost empty with only a few stragglers left behind and Abbey can’t put it off any longer; she has to head back to class or she will be late. She hopes it won’t be the first and last time that she gets to spend lunch with Lucy, Nathan and Liam. She really likes them, and they give her a sense of hope that things might finally start to improve.
“We’re headed down to the arcade in the park, if you fancy it?” Lucy’s question catches Abbey off guard. She wasn’t aware of any free periods. In the hours you don’t have lesson you are expected to attend study sessions in the library.
“Oh… I can’t… I have class…” She stutters.
“Come on Abbey, live a little…” Liam winks at her again.
“It’s far too nice a day to be stuck inside…” Nathan adds.
Abbey hesitates. Nathan is right, it is a gorgeous day and she is already ahead in her French class. She is good at languages, and a lot of what they are learning at the moment she has already covered in her first year of sixth form back at her old school. She finds herself seriously considering it, but she is still reluctant. Abbey has never skipped class before. Ever.
“Plus, you could end up running into your best friend again. She didn’t look too happy earlier…” Lucy smiles innocently, knowing full well that if anything is going to convince her to ditch, that is it. The three of them begin to edge away as Abbey looks back at the school, still uncertain, “Come on Abbey, it’ll be fun!” Lucy shouts, gesturing for her to follow, and after another brief moment of hesitation, she does.
The last thing she wants is another run in with Natalie and from her behaviour over lunch she is obviously gunning for her. Plus it is only one afternoon, what harm can it do? Abbey is clearly trying to convince herself. Trying to come up with whatever reason she can to justify what she is doing when really, there is only one reason she is skipping school… because she wants to. It has been a long time since she did something for herself - and she can’t even remember the last time she’d had ‘fun’.
After a 15 minute walk they reach the outskirts of Hall Park, a large expanse of grass that contains within it a cricket green, a skate park and a children’s play area. Situated on the very edge of the park - with a walkway that leads back out onto the main road - is a modern café with an adjoining arcade. Outdoor tables and chairs are scattered over a large paved area at the front of the buildin
g, most of which are taken up by mothers with prams, gossiping over coffee. They receive a few judgmental looks as they sit down. It is after all the middle of the day and they are in school uniform, but it doesn’t seem to bother the others; it is almost as if they are totally oblivious to the reaction, either that or they are immune to it after skipping school so many times before? It makes Abbey uncomfortable though, any minute they could get caught.
Nathan orders drinks with the waitress as Liam leans back in his chair, kicking his feet up on the table. He puts a pair of aviator shades on and rests his hands behind his head.
“I fucking love this weather…” He sighs.
Lucy rolls a cigarette and offers one to Abbey but she politely declines.
“So what’s your story then, how come you moved here?” Lucy flicks her lighter and holds the flame to the end of her roll up before snapping it shut again.
“I came up with my family just over a month ago, well, with my mum and my brother… my sister and her husband already lived in Leeds…”
“Just fancied a change of scenery?”
“Yeah, something like that…” Abbey can sense immediately where the conversation is heading but she isn’t ready to tell anyone the full reason behind the move. She has only just met Lucy, Nathan and Liam, and the last thing she wants to do is scare them off with her depressing history. It would make the conversation awkward, and she certainly doesn’t know them well enough yet.
“My parents separated. My Dad left, he met someone else… so we came here…” It is a half-truth. Abbey’s parents have separated. Losing Ryan was too much for them and their relationship broke down over time as her dad found it too hard to cope with his own grief while trying to support her mum. Abbey can understand that part of their break-up at least. Janet was almost sectioned several months after Ryan died and there was a point when no one expected her to get better. It was a horrible time and her dad was suffering too, although that seemed to get overlooked quite a lot. In the end, the only way he could move on was in the literal sense - with a total brain dead bimbo about half his age. Abbey hated him for abandoning his family at the most horrendous time possible, what he did was selfish beyond belief, but these days she finds herself relating to him a little bit more, maybe even understanding his choice. It was just too painful for him to carry on as they were and he was suffocating, trying to hold everything together. He had to get out.
“My parents split up too, when I was little, so I know how shit it can be…” Lucy makes her personal statement in a very casual way, which gives Abbey the impression that it clearly doesn’t bother her anymore, and she wonders if she will ever be as accepting of her own family situation.
“Yeah… it wasn’t easy…” She agrees.
“Do you still see your Dad?”
“Not really, we speak sometimes… but not so much anymore…” Another sad fact of life that Abbey has simply become accustomed to.
“I don’t see either of my parents these days, they’re a total nightmare. It’s just me and my brother Darren now…” Nathan puts his arm around Lucy and squeezes her shoulder, “… and this one too of course!” She smiles, leaning in for a kiss.
“How long have you guys been together?”
“Just over 3 years…” Nathan answers before Lucy has chance to and he smiles at the ground, looking a little embarrassed, “God knows how she’s put up with me for that long…!”
“I do ask myself that question a lot… I guess I’m just a saint!” Nathan pulls Lucy closer and kisses her forehead.
“Well, I’m glad you do put up with me that’s for sure…”
“Of course we all know I was his first true love…” Liam interrupts, “it took him a while to get over me but Lucy helped!” He grins and Nathan rolls his eyes, throwing the lighter at him from across the table. Liam catches it but nearly falls off his chair in the process.
“You should meet my brother, Abbey…” Lucy adds as an afterthought, “and the rest of our group…”
“Sure…” Abbey feels a flare of excitement. “Do they go to our school?”
“No, they’re all older than us. Next time we’re out, you should come…”
“I’d like that…” Abbey is so grateful to Lucy. She wants to tell her how much her kindness means to her but she isn’t about to come on too strong. ‘Play it cool’ she thinks to herself.
As Abbey leans forward to take a sip of her drink she notices Nathan and Liam - who had been fighting across the table during this exchange - have gone oddly quiet. Abbey glances at Liam and spots the look he is giving Lucy. It only lasts for a moment and Lucy barely acknowledges it, but he was definitely frowning, with his expression almost portraying alarm, though Abbey can’t imagine why? Maybe she will ask Lucy about it later, but for the time being she chooses to ignore it.
At 3pm, Abbey reluctantly leaves the others and heads back home. She knows she could always stay out longer and tell her mum that she had met up with friends after school, but that would no doubt lead to questions being asked and Janet would see right through her. Lying convincingly is a skill Abbey has never possessed.
The following morning she bounds out of bed in a ridiculously good mood feeling nervously excited, wondering whether she will see the three of them again. Maybe they wouldn’t be bothered today? Maybe they were just being kind because they felt sorry for her? Liam might have said something to Lucy? The look he gave her might have been because she invited Abbey out again and he didn’t want that? Abbey shakes her head and snaps herself out of her deep rooted paranoia. It is getting to be a nasty habit, always thinking the worst.
She rushes her breakfast down in three bites and races out of the door, managing to catch the bus with only seconds to spare. When she arrives at school she makes her way down the side of the playing field and straight over towards the cafeteria, and as the crowd parts and the picnic tables come into view, she instantly relaxes, as sat at one of the benches waiting for her are Lucy, Nathan and Liam.
“We were starting to think you’d stood us up?” Liam throws his arm around Abbey as she reaches the table and she laughs to herself quietly, feeling stupid for getting so worked up earlier. She clearly had nothing to worry about. In fact it soon becomes a familiar routine. Every morning and every lunch time the four of them meet at the same bench. They don’t always skip school, but most days they cut out early or ditch the study sessions that are supposed to be mandatory. The way Abbey sees it, she is only missing a few of her proper classes and she is keeping on top of her work… mostly. When the weather is good they head down to the park and relax on the grass in the sun, or they go to the café and play on the arcades. The looks they get from judgemental eyes have stopped bothering Abbey too. What the hell is it to them if she skips school?
As time goes on, Abbey is amazed at how comfortable she feels in her new friends company. It’s as if she has known them for so much longer than she actually has, but then it isn’t difficult to feel at ease around Lucy. She is an open book, totally honest and a little bit crazy in the best way possible. She talks animatedly about almost everything, getting louder and faster the more excited she becomes. She discusses the books and films she loves, her family life and her childhood… and music. The conversation always comes round to music. In between her constant chatter she questions Abbey relentlessly about her life; about her favourite this and favourite that, listening intently as she answers. Abbey responds as truthfully as possible while managing to avoid the one topic she isn’t keen to bring up. Lucy’s attitude is infectious. She lives by her own rules and isn’t afraid to be herself. All she seems to care about is having fun, and Abbey loves that about her… about all three of them.
The more she gets to know Nathan, the more she understands why he and Lucy are together. They are a perfect match. Forever finishing each other’s sentences and laughing at the same things. He was very quiet when they first met but he has definitely come out of his shell. He is a great conversationalist and Abbey can chat
with him easily. Despite his relative shyness, Nathan is at his loudest when he and Liam are messing around. They are like a little double act, cracking jokes and play fighting, constantly throwing insults and banter at each other. Abbey can’t remember a time when she had laughed so much or so often… and she feels free. As if all her troubles have been forgotten, pushed to the back of her mind and locked away. She still misses Ryan, just as much as always, but she is starting to feel like she has a life again. She has something positive to focus on, a genuine friendship, with people she likes… and it feels great.
Abbey kicks off her shoes and stretches out on the grass, closing her eyes, contentedly. It is another gorgeous day - not a single cloud in the clear blue sky - and best of all, it is a Saturday. No school to worry about, just an entire afternoon of sunbathing and relaxing in the park. ‘Bliss’.
Lucy sits cross legged at Abbey’s side, mindlessly flicking through the pages of a gossip magazine as her portable radio plays the latest chart music. Nathan and Liam are in the arcade - battling it out on the air hockey table - and every now and then Abbey can hear one of them swear or shout something indecipherable, making her smile. It is clearly getting competitive.
“The usual load of crap…” Lucy sighs as she throws away the magazine. She untangles her sunglasses from her wild, mess of hair and leans her head back to face the sun. “Abbey…?”
Even Angels Fall Page 4