Pawn (The Pawn Series Book 1)

by Robin Roseau

  "We can't," I said.

  "Whom have you thought about, Yalla?"

  I rolled away from her, giving her my back, saying nothing. So she moved closer, setting a hand on my shoulder. "Whom?" She asked.

  "Juleena," I admitted. And then, almost too quietly for her to hear, I admitted, "And you." Then I said more loudly, "But we can't."

  "We could," she said.

  "No. I have to marry someone in a year, and I don't want to fall in that kind of love only to have it end. And Queen Ralalta said I couldn't have that kind of relationship."

  "She said you couldn't with a boy."

  I rolled back. "What do you think they'd do if they found out you and I had that kind of relationship?"

  "It's no big deal."

  "It's a big deal when one of us is part of a peace treaty," I said.

  She reached over and caressed my face. The touch felt nice, and we stared into each other's eyes. "Just once, then," she whispered. "Your first kiss. Let me have your first kiss, Yallameenara."

  Muranna rarely called me by my full name. When she did, it was to make a point.

  She smiled tentatively. I thought about granting her wish. At the thought, my breath caught, and my heart began pounding in my chest. I felt my face grow warm and my body tingle.

  "Please, Yallameenara," she said. "One kiss."

  "One kiss," I agreed.

  "Close your eyes," she ordered immediately.

  "I want to watch."

  "That's now how it's done," she countered. "Close your eyes." And so, obediently, I closed. I felt her shift, coming closer, then she pressed on my shoulder, pushing me onto my back. She climbed above me, and I didn't stop her.

  She leaned down and brushed a soft cheek against mine. "I love you, you know," she said into my ear.

  "I love you, too," I whispered back.

  Then she shifted position a little, straddling my hips while leaning down, supporting herself above me. I could feel both our hearts pounding together, one rapid, hard rhythm. With one hand she cupped the back of my head. Her thumb caressed my cheek, and then she lowered herself again. I could feel her breath upon my lips, my hot, ready lips.

  "One kiss," she whispered.

  And then she touched, brushing her lips against mine. And with that contact, my entire soul leapt in joy. I wrapped my arms around her, holding her tightly. She in turn deepened the kiss, and we both moaned.

  I knew right then that this instant in time would define my life. Oh, I didn't fully understand why, but the significance of the moment wasn't lost on me.

  I've been kissed since. Of course I have. I've been kissed by very artful kissers. And so I know this kiss was between two young women, neophytes in the ways of love, both of us. And so, the kiss didn't carry the skill of experienced lovers. But nevertheless, it was a beautiful kiss, an amazing kiss, full of passion and -- although I didn't know it at the time -- promises for the future, promises I made to myself.

  Finally Muranna pulled away. My eyelids fluttered open in time to see hers do the same. We stared at each other, lips parted slightly for both of us. I stared into her eyes, and she into mine.

  "That was everything I could have imagined, Yalla," she said.

  "Yeah," I agreed. I pulled her to me, hugging tightly, our cheeks pressed together this time, our hearts still pounding. "We can't do that again. It would hurt too much... later."

  "I know," she agreed. "I would it were different, but it is not."

  "We should never tell," I said. "They would keep us apart."

  "It will be our secret," she agreed. And then she shifted off me to lie beside me again. "Roll over and I'll scratch your back."

  To this day, neither of us has ever told a soul about that kiss, that stunning, amazing, remarkable kiss. That soul-wrenching, life-defining kiss.

  Assistant

  The Winter Solstice arrived. It was one of the maids who won our contest. The caterers hated the theme, but the guests loved it: Each Original. It was inspired by snowflakes, how each is unique. The caters and the decorators hated it, because everything they made had to be unique. They couldn't make twenty or fifty of the same thing. They had to make twenty or fifty things, each at least a little bit different than everything else.

  The maid was ecstatic. She won not only the hundred crowns but also an invitation to the festival. It was only a hundred crowns, and so I was somewhat puzzled by her jubilation, but when I mentioned that to Juleena, she pointed out that not everyone was able to swindle people through superior horse riding.

  Swindle. She called it swindling, although she was grinning at me when she said it.

  But then she reminded me my initial monthly allowance from the queen had only been twenty crowns, and so a hundred crowns was five months of my allowance, if Muranna and I hadn't found ways to enhance our earnings.

  Muranna and I worked hard in the weeks leading up to the Solstice, doing anything Malta asked and wearing a smile while we did it. Some of it was fun. Some of it was hard. And some of it was simply necessary. What I especially liked surprised me. As Malta's trust in us grew, she gave us increasing autonomy, becoming less and less likely to tell us how to do something and just what to do. For things that weren't critical, she just told us to take care of it. For things that were more critical, she checked on what we did, occasionally making suggestions. What was important to me was the feeling of being trusted with something important.

  Maybe this wasn't a crucial trade negotiation with another country, but it was an important festival. Queen Ralalta, Princess Juleena, and Lady Malta were trusting Muranna and me. And that felt really good.

  But the solstice came, and the solstice went. And my life returned to a new form of normal.

  * * * *

  I've said that Muranna and I were nearly inseparable. And largely we were. But Juleena didn't simply bring me to the capital and then leave me. I had the suite connected to hers, after all. It was Juleena that oversaw my education and my introduction to my possible future husband. And like as not, if she was home, we shared breakfast together. And while she didn't often appear to have leisure time, she seemed to enjoy spending the time she had with me or sometimes both Muranna and me.

  And, of course, Muranna had duties beyond teaching me to survive in Framaran society. And so while we spent much of our time together, it wasn't every waking moment.

  It was my relationship with Juleena that would see changes following the Solstice.

  * * * *

  It began about four days after the Solstice. Muranna had duties for Lady Griffen that day, a lunch with friends. Muranna complained that Lady Griffen liked to put her on display, but she always came back with a certain glow, as well, so I think she liked the attention.

  It was over breakfast that Juleena, learning of Muranna's duties for the day, invited me to lunch with her. Of course I said "yes".

  It is important to understand one simple fact. I adored to the point of worshipping Juleena. When we first met, she was everything I wasn't: strong, brave, independent. To my eyes, she was tall, exotic, beautiful, and absolutely brilliant. I admired everything about her.

  I never understood why she wanted us to be friends, but we had become so, and I felt I could tell her anything.

  Well, now that Muranna and I had shared a kiss, almost anything.

  "Why don't we spend the day," she added, almost as an afterthought. "We can ride up the coast to Gessen. I want your opinion on something."

  I smiled. "I'd love to."

  And so an hour later found both of us in our riding leathers atop our mounts. Zana was my favorite, of course, and Juleena was on Daggarwind. We weren't alone; Juleena never went anywhere alone. But the honor guard was modest and gave us our privacy.

  It was a crisp day, but the weather near Marport, the capital of Framara, was mild, tempered by the sea, Juleena had once explained. The storms could be fierce, quite fierce, but so far it had been a mild winter with only a dusting of snow. Underneath me, Zana was spiri
ted, and I knew she wanted to run. Daggarwind picked up on Zana's mood, and from time to time danced underneath Juleena or leaned his head over and nipped playfully at Zana.

  The two had become friends, just as had their riders.

  "What a beautiful day," Juleena declared. "Whoever thought of a ride today was very smart."

  "She was," I agreed with a laugh.

  Just then, Daggarwind took another nip at Zana. Oh, they were playful nips, and he didn't really bite. But still, it was the principle of the thing.

  "I believe if Daggarwind does that again, I'm going to give Zana permission to return the favor."

  "I believe that is about the worst idea you've ever had," Juleena replied.

  "A properly trained horse wouldn't try to nip poor little Zana."

  "He's flirting."

  "He's not her type." Juleena laughed at my declaration. "I'm serious," I added. "I don't want to think about the size of the foal. Zana is too small for that."

  "Perhaps you're right, but I don't believe your concerns are going to keep Daggarwind from trying to flirt with Zana."

  "So he is a typical boy," I said. "And doesn't know that no means no?"

  "I do not believe Zana is the one saying 'no', Yalla."

  "So you encourage this behavior of his, this nipping and this prancing?"

  "Zana doesn't seem to mind."

  "She's too intimidated to complain," I replied.

  "I can see that by her erect ears and bright eyes," Juleena said. "And she's doing her own prancing." Juleena laughed again. "You've come a long way, Yalla."

  "What do you mean?"

  "Zana is an Arrlottan horse, but you expect her to have a choice in who flirts with her. I imagine you believe you have such a choice as well."

  I smiled at her. "Muranna has taught me many things, including how to ignore boys who flirt."

  "A valuable skill."

  Just then, Daggarwind took another playful nip at Zana. I was watching for it and subtly told her to shy to the left, pulling away from him, then gave her more direction to, in effect, misbehave. Once I got her settled, I said to Juleena, "You see? She does not care for his advances."

  She laughed again. "How much of her behavior was on your command?"

  "How can you ask such a question?" In response, she simply raised an eyebrow. I sighed. "Maybe some of it."

  "That's what I thought," Juleena said.

  "And how much of Daggarwind's behavior is on your command?"

  "Not a bit."

  "So you are saying I have more control over my mount than you do over yours. I am glad we finally agree who is the better rider."

  At that, she guffawed but otherwise said nothing. But a moment later, with just a glance to each other, we set our mounts into a trot, helping to work off some of their energy.

  * * * *

  It was a beautiful ride to Gessen. We arrived at the city gates with the horses in good spirits, snorting their pleasure but ready for a break. Juleena directed us to the stable, and after seeing to the needs of our mounts, she threw an arm around my shoulder. We headed into the city proper.

  It was early for lunch, and so she took me to the shops. There was better shopping in Marport, but sometimes it was nice to stop by the other cities to see what they had. It wasn't always that the best craftsmen wanted to live in the capital, and so one could sometimes find delightful treasures when away from home.

  It wasn't until we were outside a milliner that I remembered what Muranna had said about hats. I pulled Juleena to a stop and looked in the window. We window shopped for a minute before I asked, "What do you think about hats?"

  "On you or on me?"

  "In general."

  "The right hat can make someone look quite dashing," she said. She paused, then pointed. "For instance, that one would look great with what you're wearing today." I looked and saw a simple, black leather hat with a wide brim. "Shall we see if they have anything that fits you?"

  We stepped inside, a bell announcing our arrival. We heard a voice call out from the back of the shop, and a moment later a wizened woman stepped through the curtain. She smiled a wrinkled smile.

  "Good morning, fine ladies," she said.

  "Good morning," Juleena replied. "My friend here was curious about your hats."

  "Was she?" said the shopkeeper. "And so you step into Vaska's shop." She stepped forward and collected my hands. "You're a pretty thing. What's your name?"

  "Call me Yalla," I said.

  "Yalla, is it?" she asked. "That is as unique a name in Framara as Juleena." And with that pronouncement, we both nodded our heads to Vaska. "Well, well. Imagine that." She clicked her tongue. "Imagine that. What type of hat were you thinking about today?"

  "I don't know," I said. "We saw your shop, and I wondered if I should wear hats more often."

  "Of course you should wear hats more often," Vaska said with a smile. "You should have a new hat for every day of the year."

  Juleena laughed. "And I bet you would be happy to make them for her, wouldn't you Vaska?"

  "Of course I would," said the old woman. "Are you looking for a hat to wear today, or for an upcoming event?"

  "I think perhaps two hats, if I have sufficient funds," I decided. "One for today, and one I might wear during a casual evening with friends."

  Juleena had been working her way around the room and came to a stop before the hat she'd pointed out earlier. "I thought perhaps this one," she declared.

  "Ah," said Vaska. "A good choice." She took my hand and led me to the display holding the hat in question. She looked at me critically for a moment and then said, "This is not quite the right size for you, but it is not so badly sized you cannot try." She collected the hat and then held it for me to see. "We began with a fedora, but in leather instead of felt. But then we widened the brim to provide more protection from both sun and rain." She went on to describe the features and construction of the hat then pulled me to a mirror, moving behind me. She delicately set the hat in place atop my head, but then held it, slightly elevated.

  "As I said, this is slightly too large for you, but we have more, so if you like it, I can bring them out."

  I looked at myself in the mirror. Juleena stepped over and judged me carefully. "It suits you," she said.

  "I like it," I declared. "What do you have for Juleena?"

  * * * *

  We spent the better part of a half-hour in Vaska's shop. In the end, both Juleena and I walked out wearing new hats, suitable for riding, and I had a second little hat that Vaska called a fascinator. It wasn't really a hat so much as just something to clip into my hair, made almost entirely of feathers, but Juleena declared it delightful, and I decided it added interest.

  I tried to convince Juleena into her own fascinator, but she only said, "Maybe next time." But I think she was surprised when I wouldn't let her buy the hats but instead bought all three of them myself. Outside the shop she thanked me.

  "You're welcome," I said. "You look good."

  "Thank you," she said again. "So, you parted with some of your hard-earned money."

  "Hey!" I complained.

  "When is the last time you bought something more expensive than a hair ribbon, which I know you use as bait for unsuspecting boys who think they can out-ride a member of the Horse People?" I cocked my head, thinking about it. "You let those same boys buy you your meals. And whenever you need a new dress, somehow Mother or I always buy it for you."

  I hung my head, turning away, then said quietly, "It's not because I'm not willing to buy my own things."

  "Hey," she said, her hands on my shoulders. "I'm teasing."

  "You think I'm a..." and then I used one of the words Muranna had taught me. "A mooch."

  "Yalla," she said slowly.

  "I don't buy my own dresses because I don't know how," I said softly. "But I buy my own riding clothes, or at least some of them." I looked down at my feet. "I bought these boots." I looked at my hands. "Muranna bought the gloves, but I have ot
hers at home I bought." I turned to her. "I know how to buy these kinds of clothes."

  "Yalla," she said again, "I was teasing."

  "You and Queen Ralalta are the ones who make me wear the dresses," I said. I gestured to myself. "I'd dress more like this all the time if I could."

  "Yalla, I was teasing. To be honest, I've been watching you build your funds for three years, rarely spending very much, and I wasn't sure what you were saving it all for."

  "Muranna likes buying new clothes," I said. "But the only things I need are the things you and Ralalta tell me I need, and then you take me to buy them besides."

  "You don't actually have a plan for that money?"

  "No, but I might give it all to Muranna."

  "Why would you do that?"

  "Because I still don't know who you're going to marry me to, but if my choice is to let Muranna have it or let him have it, I might let Muranna have it."

  "Why would you have to make that choice?" Juleena asked. "It's your money, not his." She smiled. "You do understand in Framara, a man doesn't rule his wife like he does on The Hippa."

  "I'll decide when I see whom Queen Ralalta chooses for me," I replied, putting the matter to rest.

  At that she nodded. And then she tried to slip an arm around my shoulders, but the brims of our hats collided, and we stepped apart.

  "Oh, that's just wrong," she said with a small snarl. She adjust the set of her hat, then the set of mine, and when she put her arm around my shoulders again, we fit perfectly.

  * * * *

  She took me to a simple pub near the harbor, although she first offered a warning. "In many port towns, this is the sort of pub where you would find the most unsavory characters, and even with our guards, we would not be safe."

  "So why is it safe today?"

  "Because this is Framara." She grinned. "We do not allow unsavory characters."

  I laughed. "What's the real reason?"

  "Gessen isn't a deep water harbor." She nodded out the window. "Those are fishing boats. But you don't see the large ships you can see in Marport. If we were further from the capital, there could still be smuggling operations even in a shallow harbor town like Gessen, but you would be foolhardy to attempt to smuggle under the watchful eye of the Framaran navy."