Caspers Ghosts

by Victoria Hyder

  “Well yeah but you were both in the hospital so you both missed it.”

  “She has a point,” Camilla murmured.

  Glancing at both their faces I felt my heart drum in my ears. My gaze fell upon Casper who, surprisingly, had a very open expression on his face. “Would –would you want to still do something for your birthday?” I asked, feeling timid as his grey eyes swept over me.

  “I wouldn’t mind it,” he replied, “Considering I turned twenty-one in a hospital bed listening to nothing but my heartbeat on a monitor, and doctors trying to drill into me how insane you clearly were. I think I’d like to see what you can give me.”

  Cringing I glanced down at my plate. My appetite had gone. “Then I’ll have to think of something to do for your birthday.” Looking up, I saw there was a faint flush on his cheeks. I smiled a little wider, “Unless you had something planned?”

  “I might have a little something planned,” he stated with a shrug, “But I’m sure we’ll find time for both.” He gave me a cheeky little wink that made my stomach flip.

  “And as soon as my school lets out I can come down to Uncle Brian’s and see you both!” Katie grinned at me.

  My smile drooped a little, “Katie, Casper might not be staying at Brian’s with me.”

  She rolled her eyes, “Okay so then I’ll come and see my big brother. Gosh!”

  I couldn’t help but chuckle as we fell back into general chatter. It felt nice after barely speaking more than ten words in a day, most answering ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to various mundane questions. After we left, Camilla and Katie took a quick detour for ice cream whilst Casper and I stood inside the gates of the nearby park, taking in the fresh, clean air and leaning close to one another. Despite how much I wanted to touch him, I didn’t want to push it. He’d had almost an entire month to get used to not being touched again. However, the way I felt in that moment was the calmest I’d felt since my breakdown. As long as he was nearby, it was more than enough to anchor me for now.

  “Are you boys ready to head on back?!” Camilla called out.

  Glancing at his watch, Casper grimaced. “Shit, we’re going to be late. We were meant to have you back in your room by six.”

  “What time is it now?”

  “Just gone half five.”

  “Shit!”

  Suffice to say, running at break-neck speed through white hallways making my way to the psyche ward was hardly my idea of a good time. However, the fact that Casper was rushing along beside me made the whole experience incredibly enjoyable! My lungs were screaming in my chest as I skidded around a corner, Casper clinging to my hoodie so as not to fall on the slippery floor. It took an extra little sprint and sliding sideways for us to make it through the ward-door just before it closed. There was no nurse at the reception desk so we hurried to my room and slipping inside just as Casper’s watch bleeped.

  “Holy fuck this has been the best day!” I gushed, panting.

  Rolling his eyes, Casper grabbed my face and crushed our mouths together. I kissed back, my hands tangling in his sleek, dark hair. I groaned as he shoved me up against the wall, his hips grinding against mine. His teeth attacked my neck as I gasped, his hand roughly rubbing at me through my jeans and making me grow hard.

  “Oh God Casper don’t –!” I moaned against his shoulder as he grazed his teeth along my jaw. The sudden sound of squeaky shoes made him spring away from me and straightening himself up at lightning speed.

  I was left a wobbly, weak-kneed mess as a nurse stuck her head in the door and frowned. “It’s six o’clock now. Visiting hours are over!”

  “Just leaving,” Casper stated dryly, refusing to break eye contact until she huffed and continued on her way. With a smirk he turned to me, pressing up close and tenderly touching his lips to mine. “Looks like I’ll have to come back another day.”

  “I guess you will,” I grunted, my breathing still erratic.

  Smirking wider he grazed his fingers up along my shaft making me bite my lower lip. “Video chat me tonight. I want to watch you take care of yourself.”

  “Damn you for being so hot!” I groaned as he drew his hand away and pressed a chaste kiss to my mouth. “Wish you didn’t have to go.”

  “I know,” he sighed and pressed our foreheads together, “Not long now. The sooner things are sorted, the sooner you can come home.”

  “To you?”

  With an affectionate smile that was as rare as a blue moon, he tilted his head at me. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

  He disappeared through the door and I was left reeling from all his touches and kisses. Turning my back on the door I made my way over to the bed and slumped on it.

  The next day I asked to give my statement to the police.

  The day after that my parents came.

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Brian helped me haul the last bag up into the boot of the car. I felt a shiver run down my spine. Clapping me on the shoulder he made his way over to the driver’s door and climbed in. I hung back a little, a breeze stirring the hairs on the nape of my neck. I cast one final look up at the hospital. Just over a month I had been locked in the room, counting cars in the parking lot –the very same one I was now standing in –and waiting for stale food and tablets to be distributed every day. It had been Hell and I was glad it was over. Finally, I sighed and raked my hair out of my eyes before climbing into the car.

  “All ready?” Brian asked as I fastened the seatbelt over my lap. With a stiff little nod, he watched over his shoulder as he pulled out onto the main road. As the hospital shrank in the rear-view mirror I felt myself relax and eventually breathed a sigh of relief. A little while later Brian clapped me on the arm and grinned, “There you go, kid, you’re free at last!”

  I gave him a weak smile, “It’s good to be out.”

  “I’m sorry the visit with your parents didn’t go so well,” he stated grimly, referring to earlier that week when both my parents had –eventually –turned up to see how their only son was doing after a mental breakdown. Not that it mattered, after the way they’d both treated me and spoken at me rather than to me, I didn’t want to see either of them for a very long time.

  Shrugging I said, “Yeah, well, what can you do?”

  “Don’t get yourself down, kid. Your dad will come around eventually. At the very least he’ll bring Katie to see you.”

  “I don’t even want to see him. He’s my dad and I love him, but I can’t be in the same room as either of them. Not for a while.”

  “Not even for Christmas?” he asked with a heavy frown. Christmas was generally the time that relatives –close or distant –would come together to try and put their differences aside for the sake of festive memories. Unfortunately it lasted all for a long weekend before everyone went back to ignoring one another, save for the sporadic birthday cards.

  “We’ll see,” was all I said on the matter as we pulled onto the motorway.

  That night after I’d eaten with Brian, shared a few laughs watching comedy re-runs and lazing about on the sofa, I retired to my room and tried to unwind as I crawled under the covers and started to read by lamplight. It was strange having so much space and freedom after being restricted for so long. It felt as though I was wearing my skin after a long time of not wearing it, and now it was itchy and didn’t seem to fit properly. I was just getting into the third chapter that evening, when my phone buzzed. Grabbing it, I felt my jaw drop as Casper’s display image on my phone flashed, an ‘ANSWER VIDEO CALL’ message blinking up at me. My thumb managed to press the green button. Casper’s real face appeared on the screen. The lighting was dim and his face was pale as normal and his eyes just as bright even through the darkness. “Hey,” he smirked up at me from my phone.

  “H-Hi,” I managed before clearing my throat, “What’re you doing? I didn’t think we video-called one another this late.”

  Giving me a pointed look he sighed, “Well I fancied changing things up a bit. Do you have your earphone
s there?”

  “Maybe.”

  “Plug them in.” Unwinding my earphones, I plugged them in and settled back, holding the phone in front of my face. “Perfect,” he smirked wider. My stomach tightened as he grinned, his voice like a whisper directly in my ear. If I closed my eyes I could imagine he was lying in the bed next to me. “What’re you wearing?” he purred.

  I snickered and shook my head, “That’s the cheesiest line ever.”

  “Shut up and answer the question,” he growled.

  “I’m wearing my boxers and pyjama bottoms.”

  “No shirt?”

  “No shirt.”

  “That’s hot,” the sound of rustling caught my ear. I watched him kick the covers away, his firm body and slender thighs now visible, with only a pair of black boxers shielding his dick from my eyes.

  “Says you,” I grinned as I stretched out and held the phone at arms-length.

  Humming softly he reached out and dipped his hand into his boxers before his mouth hung open in a quiet moan of pleasure. “Touch yourself, Fletcher,” he groaned into the mouthpiece.

  As tempting as it was hearing his voice like that, I was feeling a little evil myself. “No,” I grinned at the screen.

  “No?” he growled.

  “That’s what I said. You have to ask me nicely.” He growled again. “Uh, uh, uh, be a good boy and say my name.”

  “Fletcher …”

  “Such a naughty boy; if you don’t say my name I’ll just have to touch myself and not show you anything.”

  He grunted again and sighed heavily, “Fine! Avery, can you please show me how you touch yourself?”

  “Oh my, you even said please. I must be special.” Positioning my phone to rest on my nightstand, I reached down and tugged off my boxers. Making sure he was watching, I slowly wrapped my fingers around myself. A shiver ran through me as he hummed in delight.

  “God, you’re sexy,” he hummed, “stroke yourself.”

  “Oh, I am. I could get off to your voice alone,” I breathed, tipping my head back on the pillows and spreading my legs wider.

  “Do it then,” he grunted.

  “What?”

  “I want to watch you get-off on just my voice.”

  I felt myself harden as I tugged a little harder, the roughness of my palm being no match for the feel of his wet mouth swallowing me down. Letting a small moan escape me I rubbed the base of my thumb over the wet, swollen head and shuddered as I raked my nails down over my stomach. Every nerve ending felt electrically charged as I continued, Casper’s heavy breathing in my ear. “Ohh, Casper why aren’t you here?” I whined into the mouthpiece. “Goddamn I want you on top of me!”

  “Really?” he asked, surprised.

  “Yes!” I panted, “Why?”

  “I just thought you’d want to top on our first time.”

  “I want whatever you feel –Ah! –comfortable with!”

  “Well maybe I want you on top of me,” he mused. “Maybe I want your weight pinning me down, your sharp teeth in my skin and feel your hot, wet throat taking all of my cock.”

  “Oh God!” I whimpered as I fisted myself faster. I was starting to see little black spots as the build-up surged in me.

  “Maybe I want you on your knees while I fuck that pretty little mouth of yours.”

  I arched my hips, fucking my fist quickly and urgently. I was dying for release and Casper’s low, husky words were driving me mad. I was panting like an animal, sweat dripping down my face and was so, so close!

  “How badly do you want me inside of you?” he growled.

  “So badly!” I whimpered squeezing my eyes shut. “Fuck, Casper!”

  “Come for me, come for me Avery!”

  Spasms racked through my body as I came hot and fast all over my stomach. My body jolted and twitched on the mattress as the last of my energy spurted over my hand. My limbs sagged heavily, as a cloudiness started to encompass my mind, euphoria numbing the sudden exhaustion. “Fuck …” I breathed, staring up at the ceiling.

  “Goddamn that was hot,” Casper’s quiet voice sounded from the phone.

  With a heavy arm I shifted the phone so I was looking at him, “Yeah?”

  “Yeah,” his own eyes were heavy lidded as he leered at me, “Wish I was there to clean you up.”

  A shudder ran through my body and I gave a weak smile, “Don’t say things like that. I don’t have enough in me to go again.” Casper snickered on the phone. I grimaced and glanced down at myself. “Do you mind hanging on a sec? I need to clean up.”

  “Sure.”

  Setting the phone to one side, I reached for my shirt and swiped my stomach clean. I had no energy to shower and I wasn’t about to ditch Casper on the phone. “There,” I sighed settling back on my pillows “All clean.”

  “Squeaky clean?” he asked cocking an eyebrow.

  “The squeakiest,” I grinned, “Your voice is so sexy.”

  “Thanks,” he shifted a little, “I love watching you come. The only thing that’d make it better is if I was there to watch it in person.”

  “There’s always next time.”

  “I hope there is a next time,” his mouth twitched as he watched me. “You’re looking sleepy. How did I wear you out already without even touching you?”

  “You’re that good?”

  “Well I can’t deny I like the sound of that.”

  “Cocky bastard.”

  “I am what I eat, Fletcher.”

  I chuckled quietly to myself before turning over onto my side. He seemed to be in the same position, the pillow hiding half of his face. “I wish you were here with me.”

  “I know I wish I was there too.”

  “Do you have any idea when I will get to see you properly?” I tried to ignore the tension knotting in my chest.

  He shrugged his shoulder, “No, I don’t have a clue. Mum and Dad have been keeping an eye on me to make sure I’m alright, which I am,” he added quickly, “But they may not let me do anything until our results come out.”

  “So I’ll have to wait until July?” I swallowed thickly.

  “Well I think we should just take it a day at a time and see how it goes.”

  Closing my eyes for a moment, I tried to calm my nerves. “I guess that’s fair,” I breathed. I looked at the phone screen, wishing he was in bed with me and staring into his beautiful grey eyes. “I love you.”

  He gave a fleeting smile, “I love you too.”

  A yawn broke through the sweet silence and I groaned, “I guess I should be getting to sleep.”

  “Sweet dreams,” he murmured with a drowsy smile.

  “I’ll meet you there.”

  *

  Life with Brian was pretty quiet and calm. It took me by surprise after the first three days when I realised I really didn’t need to tiptoe around him. It was an intense shock to my system that this was it; this was my life from now on. There was no need to watch what I said and I didn’t need to shy away from the subject of Casper like I would’ve done around my parents. My new routine had also started. The doctors had insisted I live a healthier life-style which meant no smoking, more exercise and more time spent outside.

  I started every day with a jog before taking my tablets and having breakfast with Brian, then I’d get about my day doing whatever took my fancy. Until my piano was brought down from London, a lot of my time was spent drawing and doodling, the really good ones going into the scrapbook that I kept on my bedside. I liked to flick through it in the comfiest place in the house. There was even two open pages doodled with random chords I’d played about with in my head. On warm weekend afternoons, Brian and I would walk about the Lanes or eat fish and chips on the pier. We didn’t mention University or my results and I was glad of that. We didn’t talk about my parents either. I was glad of that too.

  It was my third week living with Uncle Brian when I got an email from a police officer stating the outcome of our ‘case’. It had been ruled as an accident taken place
after improper medical examination. I could live with that. There was also a small note stating that a restraining order against Isabel was in place, preventing her from coming within five-hundred yards of me as well as emailing and texting me. I’d even changed said forms of communication in the last week just to be safe. It helped me to breathe a little easier with each day that passed.

  It was the end of July when I got an excited email from Katie. I didn’t think too much of it at first. She and Casper were the only two people I communicated with on a regular basis. However, as I started reading I felt my heart leap into my throat;

  ‘Hey Aves!

  You will never believe what I got this morning? I got my results from Trinity! I got …

  A – History, Maths, English Lit and Language and Geography

  B –Science, DT, Art and Design

  C –German, Religious Studies

  Mum wasn’t too happy about how low my R.S. grade was but I don’t care! I can go to any of the sixth forms I want! I got some of the highest grades in my year! I’m hoping to come down this weekend; I want to celebrate with you guys properly!

  Love you lots!

  Kit-Kat xxx’

  My face split into a grin. “Uncle Brian!” I called out over my shoulder. “Uncle Brian guess what? Katie got her results today!”

  “Oh yeah?” he called down from his bedroom, “What did she get?”

  “She got five A’s, three B’s and two C’s!”

  “That’s great! What else did she say?”

  “That mum wasn’t impressed with her Religious grade!”

  I could literally feel him rolling his eyes at that response. “If her mum wants to see God so bad, I can show her a way. Mind you, she won’t be missed much.”

  This time it was my turn to roll my eyes. I couldn’t blame Brian for hating my mother. There was still a small seed of love inside me for her, but it was constantly overshadowed and beaten down by her loathing. My dad was another story. Would Katie gaining independence finally give him a kick up the arse? Time would tell.