The Power of Forgetting

by A M Russell

  ‘Come on.’ I shook her gently.

  ‘What?’ she was muffled, her face still buried in my chest.

  ‘It’s a good job I’m water proof in this.’ I gently chided her. She looked up at me glazed and dusty, tracks of tears on her face; ‘Oh Jared!’ she breathed in a shuddering breath, ‘we must go so very soon… I have to tell you. And I don’t know everything. But we cannot go with the others. Whatever we do, fate has a different hand to deal. We will go to the river if we can. The doorway that Amber told you and Oliver about, that is the quickest way out of here. I think it is just above us round the next hill.’

  ‘What do you mean Angel?’ I brushed my thumb over one cheek then the other. She moved her face against my hand and shut her eyes and hugged me tight, as we sprawled on the floor in this long forgotten place.

  ‘I must get it together…. I must….’ She shrugged me off reluctantly and forced herself to her feet. Whatever she had been saying to that other before he sent us through time with one touch…. It had made her sad. There were waves of it beating against my mind at a distance. Regret, and sadness, and longing….so much. I thought of the sky at night time filled with stars and breathed in long and slow, and in those crusted constellations I found my sanity again. I stood, finding the balance of the inner psyche reasserting itself, saying all the sensible things that the other part to the mind really doesn’t want to listen to but must.

  ‘Come on,’ I took her hand and led her back the way I had come. As we entered the room with the French windows, I saw that there still were tables near the wide doorway. I stopped for a moment surprized. A little basket like the one I had seen before, and in it the little coloured objects like bean bags. I bent closer to inspect one properly. They were indeed the same type of things. I looked round suddenly suspicious. Who had put them there? Surely they must be spying on us right now. I listened for a few moments concentrating, looking for any hint of anyone’s presence. But something was pressuring in my mind. So I tipped the little “bean bags” into a sample pack and stuffed it in a pouch. I thought that were about twelve in all… that is without counting them.

  'Jared!' said Janey, 'Look!'

  Through the French windows there was a girl stood. She was smiling at us, and raised a hand in invitation. The girl in green. I started forward, but Janey grabbed my arm. 'Don't trust blonds. Especially pretty ones.'

  'Well that's you stuffed darling!' I dragged Janey forward through the doorway, 'besides, I think she can help us.'

  'Really! Do you know this woman?'

  'I think I saw her from a horizontal position Yesterday.'

  'Actually that was today; the first version. This is the third. And what other position do you see pretty girls from?'

  'Initially upright. I'm not that clever....'

  'Sweetie, I thought you were smarter than that?' Janey seemed worried as we came near to the watching blonde.

  'I am. And right now we need to think fast my dear Angel. Our friends are not as invulnerable as we are.'

  'You missed what just said.' Janey frowned displeased with me.

  'About the first version? You could only know that if he told you something. When you.... connected. And it was about me.' I pulled her close, wrapping my arms around her. I felt her melt into me. I felt that thing that she denied flowing again as it had a few minutes ago.

  'Please don't....' Janey looked into my eyes clearly; she knew I was testing her. A little way from us the green lady stood and smiled. She turned and started down the steps. We both watched her, as round her feet sunlight swirled; in denial of the misty place that we were returning to. There were our friends in the distance; but time was stilled. They would not have missed us. Janey looked up at me again. It was as if she was holding her breath, waiting for me to decide. I saw the edge of it.... the shallow water of this devotion. That one I had never truly understood. And I didn't want to see; and yet I did. And in the distance I saw our group. I wondered why they were caught by a time distortion. And then realised that it was not by us; but elemental made, perhaps the green girl herself. There was a way to the door. And she was showing us. We just needed to unlock it when we got there. So we stood and watched, and traced the trail of light and lush greenness with our eyes, as it curved down and then up to the hill on the left. There was a zigzag in the path and then it went straight up. There! In a little rocky enclave, that would be the place. And it would take just five minutes to get there.

  'Thank God!' I said, 'I can get them out.'

  'Have you forgotten something?' Janey was still pressed tight against me. She laced her hands behind my neck and pulled me down to her soft and sweet tasting lips. I inhaled Roses. And then I could taste them. She was too much.... Too much. I was shaking. I let her go. She smiled slightly, as one who knows that she has outsmarted you; and you can really do nothing about it. I looked out over the terraced before time resumed its normal flow.

  'You always were the smart one.' I said, 'So tell me how we end this?'

  'You want answers?' stepped towards me again, 'Where there are only questions.... You need to ask the right question...'

  'What should I be?' I did not fight her now, but let her take her percentage from me. She drew out the essence of that past with the transference. The touch that for others would take several sessions over several minutes, she could do in thirty seconds. Unfortunately for me it was also quicker by the method that Janey preferred. Kissing her was strange when it was done to "download" as it were. She had learned to read me better than before. And the resistance I had been able to place in the past, simply didn't work with her any more. She had grown in power. And I saw also in persuasion. Everything counted against me. She knew me. She had seen me fail. She knew my weaknesses and my strengths, and more importantly.... My hopes and fears. I was queasy with longing for her that I did not want to show. She probably senses my tension. It wasn't as if it was entirely an unusual thing. She often kissed me. Fully; on the mouth. It was just her way. She had the power of an elemental over any man. I was certainly not exempt. I was afraid to be pleasant to her and had been always. She would use me as a way out of the awkward inconvenience of dumping some poor guy. And sad act that I am, I didn't care how many times she used me for that purpose. I was tortured by my love for her. And, as we sat down on one of the steps, we waited for the others to find us; as time sped up and the misty lightness of clouds filled the air; I was disappointed in myself for being pathetically incapable of throwing out this idea. And even Marcia, Janey's dear friend, sent to me as a distraction, had failed to erase the almost demented self-annihilating obsession. I sat there as the others walked up the now deserted terraces. Through the damp morning air, I saw Marcia; and felt nothing. She had been put there to soak up the overspill to some force of nature. She was far more powerful than any other. But I could not find the doorway out. By going with Marcia I had satisfied Janey's guilt for a while....and Janey had arranged it that way. She had fixed it all so well.

  'Anything up here?' Joe asked me.

  'Not at the moment.' I met his gaze. He blinked, surprised at my answer; well, the straightness of it I suppose. Doctors and such like always make me monosyllabic.

  'There's a path over there.' that was Hanson, being practical and somewhat more confident than yesterday. He pointed the way that the green Lady had walked. The others gathered round, Oliver had his map but seemed puzzled. It was Davey who said "Come on. Let's go." and started off on that same diagonal course down the terraces. Janey followed afterwards. Marcia came up to me and sighed. She seemed to be measuring some invisible something.... something else other than all that was seen beyond us all.

  'Come now.' Marcia seemed to have gained some new authority too; while I was shrinking. I turned with the others and obediently followed them.

  We were nearly there to the little rocky inlet. As we entered, I saw that it was a tunnel and that the place we must reach was further than that. Davey was looking ahead. The walls of this channel rose above
our heads almost meeting but not quite. I could see a band of blue sky. Lorraine was there beside me staring up too. 'Not a good sign.' she said to herself.

  'What?'

  'They're coming Jayed.' she hadn't called me that in a long time; a memory of the past. She was looking at me again, as if she could see inside, and I was the only man around. And Lorraine really believed in the deeper forces that held nature in order. She wielded a not insignificant amount of natural magic. She could alter what was already there as it were; but not create anything. But she never attempted an illusion on herself. There are some things that cannot be altered easily. They called her “Witch”, but she was something else really; an elementals' friend, a sensitive, someone who readily tuned to natures flow. She was no fake in that sense. But she had ruined the situation by being overly enthusiastic with the company she kept. After me she had, it was reported gone on some kind of hedonistic ritualised journey. She had returned to London after about six months and then quite suddenly one day, after a particularly wild party which the police were called to, she just stopped. She broke contact with all her former lovers and most of those who dabbled in the craft. She had, it seemed; become a recluse. The recent involvement in Sandglass was one thing that did surprize me. She was extreme in her views on what was possible but never had entered into a pact with the god of science before this.

  'It looks like infinity.' she said.

  'But it isn't.' I said.

  'And how would you know magician.... Who doesn't use his magic?'

  'I'm not....' but I stopped then; no point in disagreeing with her again on this point. She had always claimed to psychically tuned. I had always thought it silly; until today.

  She was looking at me with that same face she had used the day she said she was reading my aura. I thought that it was stupid. But then we had seen halos of light around others. Was that what she saw? Just because we call that a mystery did it make it so? And what had Janey done to me? Perhaps nothing. It was him. Everyone seemed.... More real.

  'There is the place!' Janey was on a narrow path ahead. We all gathered to take in what she saw.

  There was a wide channel at our feet where the deep cut of the river boiled about seventy feet below us; and to the left was a narrower tunnel honeycombed with holes and intricate lacings of rock. About a hundred yards further and we could see a bridge spanning the gap. It was clearly made of strong fibres and slung across in a place where the gap allowed a wide enough clearance for the average person to pass comfortably. On the other side was a wide gallery with various passages and shafts running in all directions. Opposite the end of the rope bridge there was a plain wall, quite flat and bare.

  'That is the place.' Janey bounced on her toes.

  'Okay folks!' Oliver said, 'let's move it.'

  We spilled down onto the bridge quite quickly. Joe was just behind Marcia when we heard the heavy rattle of feet in the path behind us. Every one froze.

  'Keep moving!' Oliver yelled and pushed Lorraine on to the bridge next. Hanson was just ahead and got a move on. Lorraine needed shoving too, so Oliver got Davey on next.

  Marcia was across and Joe joined her. Hanson was just stepping onto the opposite side when a shot rang out! Then another.... I saw the others crouch suddenly and reflexively. Davey was only quarter of the way across and making slow progress. Oliver had his gun out, scanning for the target. I was about the get mine out when I remembered Davey still had it. Oliver looked at me and Janey and at the two who were stationary; and the bridge swinging in space. Oliver withdrew the gun and gave it to me.

  'I'll get to Davey. You stay near this rock and if anything else moves apart from us; shoot it!!'

  I just nodded. Janey and I stayed hidden. Oliver started across at speed. Two more shots were fired, missing their target. The bridge was swinging alarmingly and I could see Davey from here, just hanging on and hoping for the best.

  Drat!! I saw something flickering from behind us down the long gallery. They've found the side gallery on this side and are moving quickly down it. Meanwhile Oliver is getting Davey and Lorraine moving. I cannot see a target; they are well hidden.

  'We need to cross.' I put up the gun, and then quickly got it aimed a moment later when there is someone clearly in view. The progress of the others is slow. Davey is struggling. We have to wait. Oliver can cover us. And then we will be able to cross.

  Suddenly a ringing volley clangs and rattles, and pings off the stone near our feet. Janey and I roll into a sitting position behind the rock. She makes a face at me and risks a peek.

  'They are almost there.' she said, 'Are you ready?'

  I looked down the gallery. They are pacing it slowly, wary of us. There are three I can see, but single file. I looked ahead; the galley beyond curved away to the left; if we needed we could run and be out of line of sight in a few seconds.

  Meanwhile, the others are across. They are hiding too. Except Joe, he is feeling the surface of the stone; even from this distance I can see his lips moving.

  'Remember....' Janey mutters from beside me, '.... come on Joe, you can save them.'

  'The door key!' I exclaimed.

  Janey jumped up and started yelling, 'Get down! Get down! All of them need to think together! Get it together Burgess!'

  Joe runs back towards the others, and a hail of gun fire hammers across the space. It seems to last for ages, and then stops totally.

  'Are we expecting company?' Janey whispers to me.

  I peek round the rock, 'Not yet.' I said.

  'Shit!' Janey is down on her stomach peering down slightly to the other side. I crawl beside her. We can see, but they cannot, our little group. Hanson is pressing his hand against Joe's Leg, really firmly to stem the blood flow.

  'Oh fuck!' Janey sounds desperate, then turning to me, 'tell them to get through the door now.'

  'Joe has the password.' I said.

  'Yes. But reversed.'

  'Clever girl.' I said wondering how the heck we can get out of this one.

  'Oliver!' I shout, 'Agor y drws yn awr!'

  'ddweud wrthyn sut?' Oliver yelled back.

  'What is he saying?' Janey asked me.

  'How do they make the password work Janey?'

  'Oh! It is taste for smell, and smell for taste. Got it?'

  'Okay, okay.... just a minute.' I have to think how to phrase this, my Welsh is pretty basic.

  'I'll tell him!' Janey looks like she is about to move.

  'No!' I said sharply, 'I've got it.... Oliver?'

  'Ie Beth?'

  'Arogl yn blas; blas yn arogl!'

  'Rwy'n bwyta rhosod?' Oliver asked.

  'I.... Oh crap!,

  'Technically we're fucked.' said Janey.

  'Not quite.' then shouted; 'bwyta rhosod, mintys arog!' (eat roses; smell mint!)

  'Deall!' Oliver replied.

  'Deal?' Janey looked even more startled than she had a few minutes ago.

  'It's that he understands. And I want to cut and run in a minute.'

  'Yes.' said Janey, as another block of gun fire rang out, 'we must get above them all.'

  I took out my knife. We peered round the rock. There was a silence in which we saw our friends open the door of that shimmering curtain to another reality.

  'Is there any way of closing it?' I asked her.

  'Yes.' Janey looks down as if calculating the distance. 'It's far enough. But they are in an exposed position.'

  Just at that moment someone shouted my name. The sound echoed, and there was a rushing of wind from somewhere. We crawled round to the edge of the rope walk.

  The doorway was open, and the stiff breeze was stirring the air in eddies of dust and grit. We could see Marcia and Oliver just inside the doorway, which shimmer slightly; leafy greenness and a stiff breeze. I sniffed, and could almost smell the sea.

  'Come on! Jared! What's the delay?' Marcia ducked then as shots rang out. One of them fizzed into nothingness at the boundary where the stone had become an opening. Oliver sa
w me peering down and raised a hand. I knew what he meant, but perhaps Marcia did not. More shots rang out.

  'There's no time!' Marcia called, 'Send Janey first. We can both cover her!'

  It was stupid. Rimmington's men had heard it too. Then I realised. Marcia wasn't being stupid. She was buying us some time to make a run for it. As long as they thought we were following the others they would know we could be caught at the other end. I saw Marcia's expression; she knew just as I did that they would shoot to kill Janey.

  'Jared!' Oliver called, 'Gwrdd â ni yn y cartref drws!'

  'What's he say?' Janey hissed.

  'Meet us.... Home, doorway.... Meet us at the doorway home.'

  'Okay.' said Janey, 'Jared, you have to cut me.' she held out her right hand. In the left she had a small pebble.

  'What!'

  'To close the doorway.'

  'How?' I slithered forward, Janey crawled next to me.

  'Elemental blood spilled closes a doorway permanently. They will not be able to follow at all. They'll be safe Jared.'

  'Hold out your hand.' she did so and I pricked her palm with the point of my knife. She put the pebble in that hand and curled her hand into a tight fist.

  'Ready.' she whispered.

  'Alright, we run along the gallery and go up?'

  'Yes, agreed.'

  'Right.' I wriggled forward and started to saw through the ropes. I saw Marcia staring at me. She knew this moment had to come. They were small fry, not worth the effort if Rimmington could reel in the big fish. She was perfectly still, just inside the arch of the doorway with Oliver. I had one rope on a few strands and started on the next. A minute and they were all almost through. Oliver nodded slowly.