Past Regrets: Love and Friendship, Book 2

by Shelley Munro

  Ryan fumbled with the outer wrapping of the condom box before he managed to extract a foil packet. Seconds later the latex was in place. He moved up her body, touched his lips to hers and slipped inside her. It felt like coming home. Ryan started moving and her hips shifted in counterpoint. The tight clench around his shaft forced a moan from deep in his chest. His breath caught as he watched her face, the minute shifts of expression as she started the climb to a peak again. He stroked into her faster, hurling himself greedily into the pleasure of the experience. She filled the gaps inside him, the loneliness. God, she made him feel whole.

  Her arms wrapped around him, holding him tight. Ryan grunted, slammed into her. Once. Twice. And a third time, then his orgasm roared through him, white noise echoing in his ears. His lips sought hers again, anchoring himself in the present.

  Aw, sweet. So sweet. He withdrew a fraction and pushed back into her heat. Lazy, easy thrusts even though he’d come. Julia groaned, her hips lifting. Taking her subtle clue, he reached between them and stroked her clitoris.

  “Yes. Right there. No! Don’t move.” She grabbed his ears and tugged.

  “Ow, woman. Bossy much?”

  “Get me off,” she ordered.

  Laughter spilled from him along with contentment. His finger worked her, and he watched her face again. Her eyes fluttered closed, arousal colored her cheeks in a delicate pink. Her lips were swollen. Her blonde hair tousled. Sexy. She came, shuddering and squeezing his cock in rhythmic pulses, looking beautiful.

  “Was that up to your expectations?” he whispered after he’d withdrawn and dealt with the condom. He tucked her against the curve of his body.

  Julia yawned. “Hmm, I need to get some sleep.”

  Some of his feel-good attitude dispersed. He opened his mouth to say something, to ask if she hadn’t enjoyed their lovemaking before thinking better of it. Crap, questions would make him sound needy and lacking in self-confidence. Him. The guy who, according to Caleb, charmed females of every age with nothing more than a smile. The guy who fronted French Letters and held their fans in thrall. The man voted sexiest scoundrel for the last two years in a row by Madam magazine.

  Julia’s deep, even breathing indicated she’d fallen asleep while he felt like a theatre prop—an object present to illustrate a point.

  The next morning, Ryan woke alone. Gritty eyed, he sat up. “Julia?”

  Frowning, he scrambled out of bed and padded to the bathroom. The faint scent of Julia’s perfume filled the air, but by the time he reached the kitchen he knew he was alone in the apartment.

  “Damn.” He stomped back to the spare bedroom, indignation in every rapid step. He might have slept with a lot of women before Julia came along, but he was pretty sure he’d never sneaked out before they woke or left them feeling cheap and used.

  Chapter Eight

  “They can’t do this.” Julia strode across her mother’s bedroom, shaking the letter from the bank in her hand. She’d popped in early to see her mother and hadn’t expected a bombshell to greet her. She turned back to face her mother and Janet. “I’ve paid off the arrears. All the payments are up to date.”

  Janet sent her a warning glance, one that told her she needed to pull herself together for her mother’s sake. Janet was right of course. Her mother needed tranquility now that her operation was scheduled.

  “They have the right to call in the loan. It’s in the small print.” Regret weighted her mother’s demeanor. “I didn’t want things to end this way.”

  “I’ll go and talk with them,” Julia said. “I’ll take Susan. She’s good with financial stuff. We’ll show them the budgets Susan has done and tell them about the bookings we’ve lined up already.”

  The lines on her mother’s pale face deepened and her posture sagged inward. “I’m sorry, Julia. This mess is my fault.”

  Janet sat on the bed and took Elise’s hand. “Don’t worry. Julia will take care of everything.”

  Julia sought her mother’s gaze and held it, pushing out confidence despite the quivers of fear dive-bombing like fishing seabirds in the pit of her stomach. “It’s not your fault, Mum. We’re on target to open this weekend instead of next. We intend to use the first week as a trial to sort out teething problems and have our grand opening night as I’d originally planned. I’ll ring the bank and arrange an appointment.” She folded the bank letter and tucked it into the pocket of her jacket. “How are you doing this morning?”

  “Janet and I are going out for breakfast. I fancy some fresh air,” her mother said, still looking as if she blamed herself.

  “That’s wonderful,” Julia said in a bracing voice. She would fix this if it killed her because she hated seeing the defeat sitting on her parent’s strong shoulders, weighing her down when she needed to focus on her health. “Do you need help getting dressed?” She didn’t ask if her mother was strong enough for the outing, despite thinking it. Her mother deserved sunshine in her life after working hard for as long as Julia could remember.

  “Janet and I will manage.” Her voice regained a fraction of her normal determination.

  Julia brushed a kiss over her mum’s cheek. “I’ll leave you to it then. I’ll be in the club if you need me for anything.”

  She spent the next two hours practicing a dance routine and going through arrangements for their first private function.

  Susan, Christina and Maggie arrived together and joined her practice. The music came to an end and they stopped, panting with exertion.

  “That was brilliant,” Susan said. “I managed to get through the entire routine without a mistake.”

  “Did you get your confirmation from Farmer Wants a Wife?” Christina asked.

  “You’ve received more details?” Maggie demanded.

  Susan nodded, looking a little sick. “The first elimination event is in two months.”

  “Where is the event? What do you have to do? Spill already.” Maggie glowered a little. “Don’t make me pull the deets out of you.”

  Christina took a deep breath. “They’re busing us to a vineyard at Matakana, north of Auckland. Each of the farmers speed dates his group of girls, and he’ll pick his eight favorites to get to know better.”

  “I don’t know what to wear,” Susan wailed. “I’m so nervous I know I’m going to fluff my speed date. Remember the speed dating thing we went to last year? I sucked.”

  “We’ll practice mini interviews with you,” Julia said. “The clothes thing is easy because we have an expert in our midst. You should see the costumes Christina has picked out for our routine. They’re—”

  Ryan and Caleb walked into the club, both carrying guitar cases.

  “They’re what?” Maggie asked.

  Julia ripped her gaze off Ryan and turned back to her friends. “Glamorous. They’re gorgeous and yet sexy too.”

  “Morning,” Caleb said in a loud voice.

  Ryan waved, and they continued to the stage. The guitars came out, and soon music filled the club.

  “They’re really good,” Christina said, wiggling her hips and swaying to the beat. Her bracelets jingled. “I’d buy their music.”

  She already had. Julia sighed, unaccountably disappointed because Ryan hadn’t come over and said good morning. “Susan, the bank has called in the loan. I need to make an appointment and go armed with budgets and lots of information to argue my case.”

  Susan gasped. “I thought you brought the loan up to date.”

  “I did.” And she’d used all her cash reserves to do it.

  “Attention on the music,” Caleb said.

  Ryan scowled as Julia strode out of the club with her friend Susan. “I didn’t realize…I thought I’d be able to talk her around without breaking a sweat.” Bigheaded oaf.

  “Your usual charm offensive not working for you?”

  “Not as well as I’d hoped. I’m not sure what to do next.”

  “Have you tried sex?”

  “Yes.” His tone emerged curt with a whiff of pis
sed.

  “Interesting. You could give up,” Caleb said, strumming several chords and making a notation on the music sheet.

  “No.” Ryan stood and shoved his guitar back in its case. “This song isn’t working right. I need a break. Have you met Julia’s mother?”

  “No.”

  “Come and meet her now.”

  They met Elise and her friend Janet at the base of the stairs.

  “We’re going out for a late breakfast,” Elise said. “Why don’t you come with us?”

  “Caleb?” Ryan turned to his mate. “How would you feel about escorting these two lovely ladies on their outing?”

  “Sounds good to me,” Caleb said.

  The Viaduct was quieter than usual since it was a weekday and not yet mid-morning. The late summer sun sent sparkles of light dancing over the water, and the foursome settled at an outside table to watch the activity on the two luxury yachts moored nearby.

  “I love a water view,” Elise said.

  “Once you’ve recovered from the operation we’ll go to Fiji,” Janet said. “Think of the white sand and the glorious sunsets.”

  Elise frowned. “I’m not sure I can afford to go now.”

  “Why not?” Ryan asked.

  “The bank has called in the loan. There was plenty of money to cover it, but my last manager did a runner after cleaning me out. The police haven’t managed to find him,” Elise said. “Julia has made an appointment to see the bank manager today.”

  Caleb and Ryan exchanged a quick look. Both of them had stacks of money.

  “Julia didn’t tell me,” Ryan said. “She was gone when I woke up this morning.”

  Janet made a tsking sound at the back of her throat. “She’s working too hard.”

  “I know this is nosy,” Ryan said, “but how much is the loan? What is Julia going to do if the bank won’t relent?”

  Elise frowned. “I don’t know. She told me not to worry and said she’d work out something.”

  “The loan is just under fifty thousand,” Janet said. “Elise and I can’t put any more money into the business. We might have to sell.”

  “I can give you the money,” Ryan said.

  “But why would you want to—” Elise broke off when the waitress arrived with their coffee.

  “Julia is my wife,” Ryan said.

  “I can help out with money too,” Caleb said. “No,” he added when it looked as if the women would turn down their offer. “Call it a loan. Both Ryan and I have seen what Julia’s done so far. Her ideas and the changes she’s made are good. She already has bookings. From my side of the fence the club seems an excellent investment.”

  “Give me your bank account number,” Ryan said. “I’ll transfer the money today.”

  Elise shot a quick glance at Janet before tipping a sachet of sugar into her coffee and giving it a vigorous stir. She tapped her spoon on the side of the cup and lifted her head. “Julia might argue. I know my daughter, and I can see you have problems with your marriage. I don’t want to land in the middle of a disagreement.”

  “It’s true we’ve had issues. I won’t deny it.” Ryan said. “We’re working through them. Elise, I love your daughter, and I have no intention of walking away from her again.”

  Janet and Elise exchanged another long look, doing some heavy duty communication he didn’t understand. Ryan’s mouth dried while he waited for their decision. He’d do whatever he had to do, whether they approved or not.

  “All right,” Janet said. “I suppose I could tell Julia the money came from me.”

  “We’ll play it by ear,” Elise suggested and beamed at both men. “Thank you.”

  “I’m sorry, Ms. Maxwell.” The loan officer used a forefinger to push his spotlessly clean glasses up his nose. “I understand your account is now up to date, but your club has been losing money steadily during the past three years. You are closed at present, which doesn’t foster my confidence.”

  “We have current budgets and cash forecasts for the next two years,” Susan said. “We intend to turn the club around.”

  “A salient point, but I’m afraid it doesn’t change anything. The bank requires you to repay the loan in full on or before the date stated in our letter. If you do not meet your obligations, we will take up our security and liquidate all assets.”

  Julia scanned the man’s ruddy, determined face and realized nothing they said would make any difference. He’d made up his mind and wasn’t about to change to their point of view. She stood and inclined her head in a polite manner while she fantasized about punching him in the nose. “Thank you for seeing us.”

  Susan followed her out of the bank and grasped her elbow once they were outside. “Can we try to refinance?”

  “That’s the only alternative we have.”

  “I’ll do some research for you,” Susan said. “Let you know your options then we can start making appointments for tomorrow.”

  “Thanks, Susan.”

  Susan gave a dismissive shrug. “I believe in the club. I think you’re going to make it work. You deserve this chance, and I want to help you every way I can. We all want to help and see you succeed.”

  Julia gave Susan a quick hug, the tingling warmth of her friend’s words helping cushion her disappointment as they headed back to the club. Music poured through the door when they entered. Ryan and Caleb were practicing again. Christina had started stenciling the walls with gold paint and was instructing several helpers.

  “The gold borders look fantastic,” Susan said.

  “They do.” Julia did a slow turn and nodded approval. It was amazing what a difference a paintjob made to the cavernous room. “I’d better go and see Mum, tell her the bad news.”

  Susan squeezed her arm and flashed a smile full of confidence. “Try not to worry. I’ll find a way to refinance, and we’ll be back in business in no time.”

  Julia climbed the stairs to the flat, and on the threshold, she took a bracing breath and plastered a smile on her face. “How was the breakfast?”

  “It was lovely getting out in the fresh air. Ryan and Caleb went with us. We were the envy of every woman in the vicinity,” her mother said, a sparkle in her eyes and a healthy blush of pleasure on her cheeks for a change. “I like your young man.”

  “I like him too,” Julia said absently while she tried to work the angles. Why would Ryan and Caleb take two elderly women out for a jaunt?

  “I should hope so,” her mother said tartly. “You married him. In secret, I might add. You still haven’t explained the why of your hurried wedding.”

  Julia felt her heart twist, then the traitorous organ seemed to plunge as if she were falling down a cliff. She sucked in a hasty breath, knowing she owed her mother explanations. “I…I was scared,” she said. “And Ryan, he sort of snuck up on me. I wanted to spend every moment with him, and marriage seemed a good idea.”

  “But you didn’t stay together.”

  “No. There are things I can’t tell you. I promised.”

  Elise nodded. “Why were you frightened?”

  Yikes, straight for the throat. “Growing up, the kids at school teased me about the club. It embarrassed me. Every man I met who knew about the club thought I was a tramp. You know, the usual stuff. I was scared Ryan might react the same way so I didn’t tell him.”

  “But he knows now.” Janet exchanged a glance with Elise.

  “Yes.” Julia frowned as she took in their expressions. “What are you keeping from me?”

  Her mother ignored the question. “Did you tell him about Lucas and what the slimy bastard did to you?”

  “No.”

  “Secrets aren’t good in a relationship,” her mother said and shot a quick glance at Janet. “The pair of you should talk.”

  Ryan. Something in her mother’s expression told her he’d done something she wouldn’t approve of. Without saying another word, she wheeled around and stomped down the stairs to the club. God, every single one of her problems started with the p
esky man. The scent of paint wafted to meet her when she turned the corner and stormed toward the stage. Caleb noticed her first and stopped playing.

  “Why did you stop—” Ryan glanced up and caught sight of her. His lips curled into his usual smile—the one that oozed charm and charisma and made a woman’s panties dampen as she considered what it would take to tame him.

  Julia scowled, ignoring the sucker punch to her equilibrium. Her hands curled to fists to halt the impulse to knock his grin off his face. “What?” she demanded in a low growl.

  Ryan’s smile lost some of its oomph. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “While you were out with my mother and Janet, you did something. What did you do?”

  “Caleb and I have paid off your loan.” He didn’t bother to sugarcoat the truth of his interference.

  “Why?” It was a howl of frustration, of anger, and her cry held pain too. She’d wanted to fix everything herself, even if the problems seemed insurmountable.

  “Julia, Ryan and I have the money, and we wanted to help. It’s as simple as that,” Caleb said in a reasonable tone. “You can either pay us back when you’re able to or we can be silent partners.”

  “You didn’t think to ask first?” Julia didn’t take her gaze off Ryan.

  “Your mother was worried,” he said. “She doesn’t need that sort of stress when she has her heart problem to deal with.”

  The punch seeped out of her argument. He was right of course. “Fine,” she gritted out. “I’ll pay you back every cent.”

  Chapter Nine

  Julia sulked about his interference for the next three days, only speaking to him when necessary. They lived in the same house and traveled to the club together, yet she continued to give him the silent treatment.

  He’d had enough.

  Ryan waited until she finished her shower and returned to her bedroom. He took a quick shower, pulled on a pair of boxer-briefs and headed for her bedroom ready to have the subject out with her. If that meant an argument then too bad. He was sick of damn pussyfooting around her.