A Year at Meadowbrook Manor

by Faith Bleasdale

  Connor. It always came back to him. He was her sticking point. She realised as she replayed their teenage years together, she had fallen in love with him along the way. However, back then, deep down she believed they would be together at some point and she was almost biding her time. She got her degree, a job on a graduate trainee scheme at an investment bank and she waited. But then that fateful day when Connor had announced that he and Elizabeth were getting married, she felt her world collapse. Her response had been to throw herself even more into work and when there was talk of a job opening in New York office she jumped at the chance. She buried her feelings for him as deeply as she could, but they weren’t ever going to go. Coming back to Meadowbrook had shown her that. They could be buried, she could get away from them, but they had never been fully eliminated. And now she needed to deal with them.

  At home, Freddie was probably mixing cocktails for their New Year’s Eve. Bella was going to be there; each of the siblings would have a partner with them. Fleur had a teenage party to go to, so it would be all the adults and their partners, including Gwen and Gerry. The party had been the trigger that made Harriet want to run away, hide away. When Pippa announced they were organising a small get-together for New Year, she quickly came up with the friends in London line. She didn’t want to be, no actually couldn’t be, there with them, the single sister, the spinster. She tried hard to keep the bitterness out of her head, but her thoughts were beginning to drown in it.

  She needed to focus on her life now, and then the future. As her father always used to say, if she let herself be happy, then the future would reveal itself to her, or something like that. But being happy, the only thing she could think of, the only thing she wanted, was Connor. If she had him then she could see herself living at Meadowbrook. She’d happily live anywhere. Without him, she just wanted to run away again.

  The idea of the future was bringing her out in hives. Or perhaps the cottage was so neglected it had mites or something.

  Being alone was proving therapeutic in some ways and destructive in others – her life had become a constant contradiction. She couldn’t leave the house, barely risked leaving the room, and she would only flush the loo if absolutely necessary. Clearly she had finally lost the plot. She needed answers, she knew that, but she had only questions. Harriet, the grown-up, oldest Singer, ex- successful banker, emotionally hampered woman, had no clue what to do next.

  And like Hilda she was just running round and round in circles.

  She passed into the new year – yay – on her own, with a bottle of champagne she’d nicked from the house and a packet of crisps.

  Her phone woke her. She opened her eyes, and saw daylight streaming through the windows. She was sleeping in a sleeping bag she had managed to sneak into the cottage, on a bed which had clearly seen better days. She didn’t like to think that it might have been where Jed, the old gardener, had died. She did wonder briefly why the cottage had been left empty all this time – typical Harriet always looking at the practical – because with some work it would be lovely.

  She looked at the screen, it was gone ten, this was the latest she had slept in ages. Her laptop was on the edge of the bed still, she had been typing, deleting and retyping notes late into the night. The bottle of champagne lay empty on the floor. Pippa’s name was flashing insistently on her phone’s display, so she pressed answer.

  ‘Hey,’ she said, sleepily.

  ‘Sorry, did I wake you?’

  ‘Yes, Pip, you did.’

  ‘Happy New Year! You must have had a great party, because you never sleep this late.’

  ‘It’s only ten.’ She rubbed sleep from her eyes.

  ‘Oh yes, well anyway, I was too excited and I wanted to tell you.’

  ‘Tell me what.’ Harriet hoped she didn’t sound as irritated as she felt.

  ‘Well, the party was great, although we missed you.’

  ‘Pip?’

  ‘Oh yes, so two things happened. Mark and I talked and he said it was time for him, for us, to get serious about having a baby.’

  Harriet groaned inwardly.

  ‘Right?’

  ‘So, we are going to see a fertility specialist as soon as the bank holidays are over, isn’t that great.’

  ‘Great.’ Harriet felt her heart sink. If Pippa had Mark’s child, she would never be free of him.

  ‘And Freddie and Loretta got engaged.’

  Oh shit. She couldn’t believe it. They called her bossy, but the minute she left the house, Mark and Loretta had clearly taken advantage of her absence.

  ‘You’re kidding?’

  ‘No, she came downstairs today with a ring that they got in a cracker – you know, until Freddie can afford something better than plastic. Freddie looked a bit shell-shocked, but you know what he’s like.’

  ‘So they’re actually getting married?’

  ‘As soon as possible, according to Loretta. And she said she’d love to get married at Meadowbrook.’

  ‘Right,’ Harriet said carefully. ‘And any other news, Gus not eloped with Amanda or Connor impregnated Bella?’

  ‘No, don’t be silly, although they do all seem happy. Oh and Gerry is taking Gwen out for a proper dinner later. He asked Connor’s permission, it was so sweet.’

  ‘Well I’m happy for her.’ Harriet really was. She wished she could say the same for the others. Apart from Gus, of course.

  ‘Oh, how was your party?’

  ‘Wild.’ Harriet looked at the empty, littered, floral carpeted room. ‘Which is why I’m probably not reacting the way you expected, but I’m so hungover. Pip, I’ll call you later, I need to have breakfast.’

  ‘Love you, Harry.’

  ‘Love you too.’

  Again, why the hell hadn’t she thought this through, she couldn’t even have a cup of coffee and she couldn’t go home for another twenty-four hours.

  She revisited her to-do list and, feeling determined and more than a little bit annoyed, she deleted what she’d written last night and retyped:

  Expose Mark and Loretta

  Tell Connor how I feel

  Those two things were all she needed to do for now, but despite the fact she was tired from being up half the night, and perhaps a bit hungover from drinking a bottle of champagne on her own, she felt, on the first day of the new year, a sense of clarity at last. Because wherever her future lay she knew that if she could do those two things then the rest of it would fall into place. She knew it in her heart.

  Chapter 26

  ‘Oh I’m so glad you’re back, did you have the best time?’ Pippa gushed.

  ‘Pip, I was gone for two days, you’re acting as if you haven’t seen me in months.’ She didn’t let on just how relieved she was to be in civilisation again. She had had to sneak out of the cottage, making sure no one saw her, to take a bus to the station, which meant waiting for an hour in the rain, her big hat pulled over her face in case she saw anyone she knew, and then let Gus pick her up from said station as if she’d just got off a train from London. She had learnt that subterfuge wasn’t her strong point.

  ‘Sorry, it’s just I am so used to having you around now.’ Pippa flung her arms around her. She looked so happy, it was heartbreaking.

  ‘So, what is happening here?’

  ‘Ah yes, well, Loretta wants to move in. Freddie looks a bit terrified about it, and he’s drinking more again. I mean, not just in the evening. We were talking about doing an Easter event – I know, Christmas is just finished but we thought combining an Easter egg hunt for the kids, perhaps doing an Alice in Wonderland theme, remember how much I loved that book as a child, with the open gardens, and it also will be shortly before the year is up,’ Pippa gushed, words spurting from her lips almost faster than Harriet could catch them.

  ‘Pippa,’ her sister was so hyper, anyone would think she was the one who’d been drinking, ‘what does that have to do with Freddie’s drinking?’

  ‘Oh yes, so we thought we’d have a meeting, Gus, me and F
red, and we thought you’d be impressed that we were doing stuff not relying on you so much, but Fred turned up and he was reeking of alcohol and it was only lunchtime.’

  ‘OK, maybe he’s freaking out about Loretta.’

  ‘Well, you see, he kind of broke down a bit at the meeting, and he says he doesn’t remember proposing, doesn’t remember getting the ring in the cracker, and now he thinks he’s going mad. And he was almost paralytic on New Year’s Eve when he did propose, anyone will tell you that.’

  ‘Did you see the proposal?’ Harriet asked.

  ‘No, he did it when they were alone in bed.’

  ‘But how, if he was paralytic as you say?’ She couldn’t be the only one who was suspicious about this, surely.

  ‘Well, apparently he did, and that’s that.’ Pippa shrugged her shoulders.

  ‘Ah.’ Harriet wondered if the engagement had been concocted between Mark and Loretta. What if they cooked it up and because Freddie often lost his memory when he’d been drinking and they were pulling a fast one. But surely even Freddie would know that he would never forget proposing? It was all beyond shady.

  ‘But he says that he can’t tell Loretta that he forgot because she’ll think he doesn’t care and it might be easier to marry her than have her think that.’

  ‘Please tell me you’re joking?’ Harriet widened her eyes. Pippa shook her head.

  ‘Mark and I have an appointment at a clinic in Harley Street.’ Pippa glowed with happiness.

  ‘Gosh, isn’t that expensive?’ Harriet decided to tread carefully.

  ‘Mark says it’s worth it. You know, he works hard and I’d rather have this than all the fancy holidays we used to have. I told you before, Mark was reluctant to get checked out but now he’s all for it, and he said if he was going to, then we may as well go straight for the best. And we’re both so happy, our sex life has improved no end.’

  Harriet held her hand up. ‘Please spare me the details.’

  ‘OK, sorry, but, Harry, I want a baby so much, and this time next year we might have another member of the family.’

  Pippa looked so radiant that Harriet wanted to cry for her. It was almost too much to bear. She was going to single-handedly burst that bubble, but she had to, didn’t she? She was doing it for their own good, after all.

  Once she’d unpacked she went to the sanctuary, picked up a very excited Hilda and then popped into the office on her way to walk her. Connor was there, at the desk.

  ‘Ah you’re back?’ He grinned. Her heart did a little dance at the sight of him.

  ‘Yes, I am. Do you have time for a quick walk with Hilda? I want to run something by you.’

  He stood up and her heart skipped a beat. If anything, a few days away from him had made him even more attractive. But that would have to wait, Mark and Loretta first, as per her list.

  ‘So how was your New Year’s? Did it make you realise how much you missed the city life?’

  ‘No, actually. I didn’t.’ She bristled. Of course she didn’t, because she was nowhere near a bloody city.

  ‘Well that’s good. All’s fine here. Quiet without you,’ he teased.

  ‘Ha, bloody, ha. Listen, I’m sure you know, but there have been a couple of worrying developments. Firstly, Pippa told me her and Mark are going to see a fertility expert in Harley Street.’

  ‘Yes, Mark kind of announced that on New Year’s Eve with a bit of a flourish. He’s definitely changed tack, and you should have seen him with Pippa, he was being so nice, attentive, he was all over her.’

  ‘If Pip gets pregnant, then he’ll always control her.’

  ‘I agree.’ Connor turned to Harriet. ‘We need to stop him.’

  ‘Right, and Loretta. She says Freddie proposed and gave her a ring, but he doesn’t remember. And, well, if he doesn’t remember proposing, then he didn’t.’

  ‘But he was very drunk.’

  ‘Yes, but still, he doesn’t do things like propose when he’s drunk, he just passes out. And don’t forget, he’s been drinking much less lately.’

  ‘You’re right, even at Christmas he didn’t get really drunk, did he?’ Connor scratched his head. ‘So what are you going to do?’

  ‘I’m going to tell them what I know. About the plotting, about Damian, and the fact that Mark is broke.’

  ‘Ouch, it’s going to hurt, but you don’t have any choice, do you?’

  ‘Nope. I’m going to do it over dinner tonight, while neither Mark nor Loretta are here. I was hoping that you and your mum would be there.’

  ‘We will. I was going to see Bella, but I think this is more important.’

  ‘So you think I’m doing the right thing?’ She was desperate for reassurance.

  ‘I have no idea, but I also don’t see what choice you have.’ He looked so sincere as he spoke to her, she felt comforted.

  ‘Connor, your support means everything.’ Harriet welled up. Connor hugged her.

  ‘You’ve always got it.’

  As Harriet walked Hilda back to the dogs’ home, and then made her way up to the house, she wondered if she did always have his support. Because, after what she was soon going to confess to him, she wasn’t sure that she would have it ever again.

  Nerves jangled as Harriet sat at the dinner table. Gwen served chicken with roast vegetables and sweet potato mash, which was one of Harriet’s favourite meals. However, she knew she wouldn’t enjoy a single mouthful. Her eyes kept shooting to Connor, who was trying to appear re- assuring. She took a sip of her wine, looked around at everyone, and decided to get it over with.

  ‘I need to talk to you all,’ Harriet said. ‘Connor knows some of what I’m about to say, but well, this isn’t easy.’

  ‘What’s wrong?’ Pippa’s voice was coated with concern.

  ‘OK, there’s no easy way to say this.’ Harriet took a breath, Connor nodded his head slightly. Gus’s eyes widened. ‘I didn’t want to tell you this, in fact I kept it quiet until now but, well, it seems with your latest announcements that I’d never forgive myself if I didn’t speak up.’

  ‘Bloody hell, Harry, can you just spit it out, you’re making no sense,’ Freddie said.

  ‘OK, right, well here goes.’ She told them everything. She told them about overhearing Mark and Loretta, the text messages, foiling Damian and Mark being broke. Her voice shook and she felt awful. She almost didn’t dare look at Pippa or Freddie as she spoke, concentrating on Connor for strength. When she finished, she sat back in her chair. The room was so silent that she could hear her own breathing. She took another drink of wine.

  ‘Let me get this straight, you are saying that Mark and Loretta are in cahoots to get their hands on Dad’s money,’ Freddie laughed. He actually laughed.

  ‘Yes, Connor?’ Harriet thought she could do with an ally.

  ‘Harry told me because we knew they were going to try to do something with the animals at the sanctuary, we stepped up security and we caught Damian, who basically admitted he’d been paid by Mark to let the animals out and also to ruin the winter wonderland, pinning the blame on Harriet.’ Connor spoke calmly, his voice steady as if to reassure Harriet that she wasn’t alone.

  ‘That proves nothing,’ Pippa started. Her tone wasn’t exactly friendly. She sat back in her chair, arms folded. Harriet rolled her eyes.

  ‘Right, I agree,’ Freddie concurred. ‘It’s preposterous.’

  ‘But, well, how would Harriet have known if she didn’t overhear them?’ Gwen said, quietly. ‘And why would Damian say it was Mark if it wasn’t?’

  ‘And I hate to stick the boot in, but Harry doesn’t lie,’ Gus backed his sister up.

  ‘I’m not saying she does lie,’ Pippa said carefully. ‘But she is clearly mistaken. Mark said you had been acting up a bit with him lately.’

  ‘Actually, Harry, Loretta said the same. She’s very concerned about you,’ Freddie added.

  ‘I’m fine,’ Harriet stormed.

  ‘You’ve always had it in for Mark.’ Pippa threw t
he accusation like a ball, right at Harriet.

  ‘Where did you get that from?’ Harriet tried to keep calm, but this wasn’t panning out as she hoped. ‘And anyway, I wouldn’t make all this up just because I didn’t like someone.’ She was trying to keep her cool but it was far from easy.

  ‘Mark told me how awful you are to him when I’m not around and I thought he was exaggerating but now it seems he wasn’t.’ Pippa’s voice was riddled with sadness.

  ‘Loretta said the same!’ Freddie exclaimed. ‘And your accusations are quite ridiculous,’ Freddie added. ‘Why would Loretta say I proposed, if I didn’t.’

  ‘You have no memory of it,’ Harriet pointed out.

  ‘Harriet, perhaps you’re unwell.’ Freddie was red-faced.

  ‘What about the money thing, Pip?’

  ‘That is something I need to speak to my husband about, but I am sure there is a perfectly good explanation. I really think it’s taken its toll on you, you know, losing your job, losing Dad. Harry, it’s understandable that you’re very unhappy, but that doesn’t mean you should sabotage our happiness,’ Pippa added.

  Harriet felt her blood boil.

  ‘Harriet wouldn’t make it up,’ Gus reiterated.

  ‘She isn’t,’ Connor concurred.

  ‘Really? She’s just convinced you both because she is so controlling, but it’s clear she’s the only one causing trouble here,’ Freddie said. Harriet felt confused, why on earth where they reacting like this? She expected them to be upset, maybe question her, but to dismiss her altogether? ‘I love you, Harry, but you always tried to control us when we were kids and now, coming back here, it’s like you wanted to just take up where you’d left off. But we’re not kids anymore.’

  ‘Oh no you don’t, don’t put this on me. I am unhappy yes, but I am not mad and nor would I ever try to sabotage your happiness, but for God’s sake your partners only care about Dad’s money and, Pippa, when Mark gets his hands on it, it’ll all go to paying off his debts, then what? You might have a baby to think of and what if you’re left with nothing.’

  ‘Mark is a successful businessman, he may have hit hard times but he’ll be a success again.’