The Distance Between Us (Mac Security Series Book 3)

by Abigail Davies

  “Kitty!”

  “Coming!” I shout back, opening my mouth and dumping them inside, swallowing them down with some water.

  I wait for the guilt to set in, but when I walk out of my room and look at Evan, all I feel is peace. My mind isn’t wandering any more. It’s silent, just like I need it to be.

  We walk side by side in silence to the warehouse, but it doesn’t really register as the pills flow through my system. I feel like I could do anything, tackle anyone. That is until I see Charlie’s car parked outside and my heart starts beating faster, my pulse spiking.

  “Charlie’s here?” I ask. I haven’t seen him for weeks now, not since he kicked me out of his house.

  “I guess.” Evan shrugs, pulling open the warehouse door.

  I step inside first, my eyes snapping around the warehouse, looking for him. When all I see is Luke sitting at the table, I walk straight to the kitchen. Charlie must be in the office with Ty and Kay.

  I need to get out of here, now. That feeling of being able to do anything because of the pills disappears the longer I’m in here and when I get into the kitchen, my breaths become gasps. I rush to the counter, gripping it and trying to center myself.

  I can’t do this. I can’t face him, not when he hates me right now and that’s exactly how he feels. I would if I was him. I snooped, looked at stuff that I shouldn’t have. Personal things and I know I should apologize but every time I write out a message to him or go to call him, I can never do it.

  “Kitty?” His deep voice is like music to my ears but I can’t bring myself to turn around and face him. I can’t bear the thought of seeing the disappointment in his eyes.

  His footsteps come closer and goose bumps rise all over my skin as his hand touches my back.

  “Don’t,” I choke out.

  “Kitty,” he pleads, his hands moving up to my arms and spinning me around. “Look at me.”

  I shake my head no but he ignores me and grips my chin with his thumb and finger, bringing my face up to his.

  “I’m sorry, baby.”

  I choke back the sob that desperately wants to come out as I look into his eyes. “What?”

  “I overreacted, I know that now. I shouldn’t have shouted at you like that.”

  “You had every right,” I say, my voice hoarse.

  “No, baby. I should have spoken to you about it and not lost my mind.” He moves closer, his feet on either side of mine as he bends at the knees so that his eyes are level with me. “Forgive me?” he whispers.

  “Forgive me?” I ask back.

  His lips lift up on one side and he tilts his head.

  “So, I was thinking.” He clears his throat, his thumb rubbing against my bottom lip. “I want to take you out on a date.”

  “A date?” I smile.

  “Yeah.” He nods, coming closer so that his lips are a whisper from mine. “I want to date you, Kitty. I want to do it right this time.”

  His lips press against mine in a soft, gentle kiss then he pulls back slowly, his eyes sparkling.

  “Okay,” I croak out then clear my throat. “A date.”

  “Great.” He grins, pulling back and letting his hand fall from my face. “I’ll pick you up at eight.”

  He takes several steps backward before he winks and turns around, walking out of the kitchen and all I can do is watch his ass as he does.

  A date… with Charlie… wow.

  I check myself out in front of the mirror, making sure my hair looks okay. Wait, why the hell am I checking my hair?

  I’m nervous. I feel like I did the night of my prom. Butterflies in my stomach and sweaty palms as I get ready for what is to be one of the biggest nights of my life. So I may be overreacting, but for me, this is a big step.

  “You can do this,” I tell myself, taking one last look in the mirror and walking out of my place to my SUV.

  The drive to the compound feels like it goes by in seconds and before I know it, I’m outside Kitty’s cottage and lifting my hand to knock on her door.

  “One sec!” she shouts.

  I clear my throat, shuffle on the spot and then look on either side of me.

  When I came to the compound earlier, I came under the pretense to talk to Ty, but both he and I knew that I was only there to see Kitty. Apparently, we weren’t as incognito as we thought and he knew all along.

  He told me that he knew I hadn’t been ready to talk about it yet, that he knew I’d tell him when I was good and ready. I thought he wouldn’t be happy about it, me doing what I’ve done to Kitty but the look in his eyes as he was sitting across from me told me that he understood, at least, as much as he could.

  When I walked past the kitchen in the warehouse and saw her standing there, I knew that it was time. Time to let the past go and live in the moment, and for the future.

  The sound of the door opening gains my attention and I look to Kitty, my breath catching in my throat. My eyes track her from head to toe, taking in her curves in the green, off the shoulder dress that flows over her body perfectly and ends just above her knees. Her creamy legs on full display and ending on those black stiletto’s, and her lavender hair flowing over her shoulders in soft, enticing curls.

  “Hey,” she whispers.

  “Hey.”

  I stand there, not knowing what to say or do. She’s completely captivated me. I’ve never seen her dressed like this; all she wears are her work clothes or pajamas, or when I’m around, preferably nothing.

  “Charlie? Are we going?”

  “Huh? Ah, yeah.” I grip the back of my neck, trying to get ahold of myself. “Let’s go.”

  I spin around and walk as fast as I can to my SUV, pressing the fob and pulling the driver’s door open.

  “Ahem.”

  “Oh, shit, sorry.” I jog around to the other side and open up the door, closing it when she’s safely inside.

  “Charlie?” she asks as I start the engine.

  “Yeah?”

  She places her hand on my forearm, squeezing gently. “Calm down, it’s just me.”

  It’s just her. Just. Her.

  I take a deep breath and close my eyes, opening them back up after a couple of seconds and pulling her hand off my arm, bringing it to my lips and kissing her palm.

  “Sorry, I’m just—”

  “Nervous.” She smiles.

  “Yeah.” I blow out an audible breath and let her hand go, grinning and then driving out of there.

  Kitty turns the stereo on and starts to sing along to the country song playing, the sound of her sweet voice calming me down enough that when we get to the restaurant I’m not so nervous anymore.

  “Fancy,” Kitty comments with a raised brow as I help her down from the SUV.

  “Too much?” I ask, flitting my eyes from her and to the restaurant front, unsure.

  “No.” She smiles, hooking her arm through mine. “It’s nice.”

  I stay silent as we walk to the main door and just as I’m about to pull the door open, she stops me.

  “Okay, stop.” She grabs the edge of my jacket, pulling me closer and I allow her to, my hands going to her hips. “Just be you.”

  “I’m trying.”

  “I know, baby. But just be you, okay?”

  “Okay.” I nod.

  She lifts up on her toes and brings her lips closer to me. Meeting her halfway, I press my lips against hers, my tongue seeking entrance and when it touches hers, I lose it. I step forward, pushing her around the corner and against the wall.

  “Fuck,” I spit when I pull away, hovering above her. “This wasn’t meant to happen tonight.”

  “Don’t think like that.” Her eyes plead with me. “Let’s just have some dinner and go from there. None of this what ‘should’ or ‘shouldn’t’ happen. We didn’t exactly start out like normal, did we? Let’s just do us.”

  “Do us?” I grin. “Yeah, let’s do us.”

  I lean down and press my lips against hers again before I grab her hand and pull her
into the restaurant.

  We’re led to a table toward the back and handed menus for food and also a wine list. I thank the waitress and look down at the menu and then back up at Kitty.

  “Do you want wine?”

  “I’ll stick to water,” she answers. “But you have a drink and I can always drive home.”

  “You sure?”

  “Of course.” She looks down at the menu with a smile on her face, her eyes scanning it.

  I could watch her all day long and not get bored. The faces she pulls and the way her nose scrunches at things that she likes or doesn’t like. The best face is the one she pulls when she’s laughing, and I don’t mean your standard laugh, I’m talking head thrown back, not a care in the world, snorting kind of laugh.

  “Are you ready to order?” the waitress asks, but I don’t look at her, my eyes are firmly on Kitty as she looks up at her, smiling and telling her that she wants the chicken. My eyes focus on the way her lips move as she talks and I can’t get enough of it. Of watching her.

  “Charlie?”

  “Oh, right. I’ll have the steak and a beer.”

  “Any kind of beer?” the waitress asks.

  “Any bottle will do.”

  She writes it down on her small notepad and takes the menus from us and that’s when Kitty looks back at me.

  “So…” Kitty says. “How’s work?”

  “Good. Closed another case yesterday so that’s another criminal off the streets,” I say robotically. I don’t want to talk about work with her, I want to know more about her, what she likes, what she doesn’t like. Her favorite fucking color.

  She chuckles and thanks the waitress as she places her water down and my beer. I pick it up and take a swallow.

  “How’s work for you? Are you back fully now?” I curse myself. Why am I asking how her work is?

  “Yeah,” she says, putting her water back down on the table. “My arm is all better now and I’m back to training every day. God I missed training.”

  “I know what you mean, I can’t imagine not being able to go to the gym.”

  “Right?” She smiles. “I love the feeling I get afterwards. You know what I mean, the adrenaline that pumps through you?”

  “Yeah, I do.”

  To say I was nervous to go out on a date with Charlie tonight is an understatement. I was physically shaking when he knocked on my door, but as the night went on, I became more and more relaxed.

  Everything that normally swirls around in my mind quiets when he’s around, and now I sit here trying to eat my cheesecake while the nerves get worse. The night will be over soon and I really don’t want it to be.

  “What’s your favorite color?” Charlie blurts out, his eyes wide as if he hadn’t meant to say anything. I stare at him for a beat and then chuckle.

  “Purple,” I say, pointing at my hair.

  A slow smirk starts to spread across his face and he nods slowly. “Thought so.”

  “Yours?” I ask, bringing a piece of cheesecake up to my lips. The best goddamn cheesecake I’ve ever eaten.

  “Blue.” I open my mouth to say something when he interrupts me. “No, green. Wait, yellow. Ah fuck, I don’t know.” He shrugs, his eyes moving from his cheesecake to mine and then up at me. “I don’t think I have a favorite.”

  I smile at the look on his face, his eyes sparkling and his lips lifted into a small smile. I still can’t believe I’m here, with him, on a real date. The amount of times I imagined this happening, and none of those daydreams ever did this justice.

  “I’m stuffed,” I announce, leaning back in my seat and resting my hand on my stomach.

  “You don’t want that then?” He points to my half-eaten cheesecake, a hopeful expression on his face.

  “Couldn’t manage another bite,” I say, pushing it toward him.

  He takes it and eats it within seconds, well, more like inhales it. To be fair, it’s really good cheesecake.

  “This is good,” he mumbles around a biteful.

  I chuckle at him and lean forward, picking my clutch bag up off the table and standing.

  “Just going to the bathroom,” I tell him when he raises a brow in silent question.

  He puts his fork down on the plate, pulling on my hand as I walk by and kissing my knuckles. I shiver at the touch of his lips on me and my mind wanders to where else I’d like those lips to be before he lets go.

  I swerve my way through all the tables and chairs and through the back hallway to the restrooms. I do my business and then check myself out in the mirror.

  The curls I put in my hair have dropped, leaving me with soft waves. My lipstick has worn off a little so I grab it out of my bag and reapply it, moving closer to the mirror so that I don’t end up drawing all over my face with it.

  I spent hours getting ready and it was all worth it. When I do my hair and makeup like this, it makes me feel beautiful, even if I do know that what’s on the inside right now is a complete mess, at least I’m projecting the image of being okay to the outside world.

  As I pop my lipstick back in my bag, my fingertips brush my pill bottle. I know I promised Evan that I wouldn’t take anymore but I found myself driving back to Wayward and Joel this afternoon. This time I got two bottles, hiding one under my bed in case something like that ever happens again.

  I took two just before I came out and I haven’t felt the need to take anymore until now. My mind tells me no but my fingers are already popping the top off and taking two out.

  “No,” I tell myself, putting them back in the bottle and staring at myself in the mirror. I don’t need them right now. I need to get back out to Charlie and let him chase all the thoughts away.

  I snap my bag shut and walk out of there as fast as I can with these heels on and head back to the table where Charlie sits.

  “You ready to get out of here?” he asks.

  “Yeah,” I answer as he stands up and wraps his arm around my waist.

  I lean into him all the way to his car and when he opens up my door, I rest my head on his chest, taking a few seconds before I turn around and jump up into the seat.

  My hands clutch onto my bag as he drives back to the compound, my head spinning all the way there. Now that I remember that they’re in my bag, I can’t stop thinking about them. The itch to take some is becoming unbearable and I open up my bag discreetly, staring at the bottle the rest of the way to the compound.

  “Want to come in for coffee?” I ask when he pulls up to the cottage. He smirks before opening his door and heading around the front of his car, pulling my door open and holding his hand out to me.

  He walks me to my door and places his hands on my hips, pulling me closer and resting his forehead against mine.

  “I enjoyed tonight.”

  “Me too.”

  We stay silent, just staring into each other’s eyes, butterflies taking flight in my stomach the longer I stare at him. I never thought we’d be here, not like this. I was sure that I’d always be the bit of ass on the side, the girl who would never be enough.

  I’m not enough, I know that, but I’ll damn well try to be, I’ll try as hard as I can.

  My eyes close instinctively as he moves closer, his lips pressing against mine on one sweet, gentle kiss and then he pulls away.

  “You didn’t answer me.”

  “Kitty, both you and I know that if I come inside, it won’t just be for a coffee.”

  “It won’t?” I ask innocently.

  “No, it won’t.” He shakes his head. “There’s something you should do before we do… that.”

  “There is?”

  “Yeah, you need to meet my parents.”

  My eyes widen at his statement and the breath leaves my lungs in one audible whoosh. The date was a big step, but this, meeting his parents, that’s a huge leap and for a fleeting moment, I wonder whether I’m ready for all of this. I may have dreamed about it for years but now that it’s happening, I’m doubting myself.

  “You want me to
meet them? As your…”

  “As my girlfriend, that’s... if you want to.”

  I take a deep breath in and blow it out slowly, flicking my eyes from his to the flowers that line the path to the cottage and then back at him.

  “I want to.” I grin, lifting up and wrapping my arms around his neck and crashing my lips down onto his.

  It’s been a week since our first date and we’ve had two more since. Each time we come close to doing anything, Charlie pulls away and tells me that we should wait.

  I could understand it if this was the first time we met and they were our actual first dates, but the fact that we’ve slept together too many times to count doesn’t make sense. I’m starting to think that maybe he doesn’t want me like that now that we’re making things between us serious, maybe I was just an infatuation and he doesn’t see me like that anymore?

  So I decide to do something drastic. I know that he’s at work today and I spend the better part of my morning getting myself ready for my plan. I shave all my relevant parts and do my hair and makeup nicely, pulling out my “special” underwear which consists of a bra and panties made of black lace and then my sky-high stilettos.

  I push my arms through my knee length coat and head out of my cottage, walking across the gravel to my car.

  “Hey, Kitty!”

  I spin around at Kay’s voice and hold my hand over my eyes to shield from the blaring sun.

  “Hey!”

  I wrap my arms around her in a hug when she’s close enough and pull back to see her eyes flitting over my face and down to my heels.

  “Where you heading looking all sexy? Huh?”

  “Nowhere,” I squeak.

  She snorts and says, “Yeah, thought so,” and walks past me. “Tell Charlie I said hi.”

  “What? I’m not going to see Charlie!”

  “Yeah, okay!” She waves me away and pulls open the warehouse door, winking at me as she goes inside.

  I shake my head at her, a smile lifting up the corners of my mouth. I’ve never had a good girl friend, someone who I could talk to about anything and everything. I’ve always been a very private person and although I’m still like that, I find myself opening up to Kay like I haven’t with anyone else.