Almost Perfect

by Jenny Siegel

  “Yes.” I reach up on my tiptoes to press a soft kiss to his lips. The hand in my hair tightens, and he holds me to him. His hot tongue slips past my lips and strokes along mine. His semi-naked body curves over mine as I sag into him. My hands rest on his bare abs, that contract under my touch. Abruptly he pulls back, his eyes glint wickedly.

  “If I don’t stop now, then I’ll drag you back to bed.”

  “Sounds good to me,” I mutter and he stills, tilting his head to the side as though considering it.

  “I’ll see you tonight.” He brushes his lips over my forehead and untangles his hand from my hair.

  “Love you.” I kiss him one last time and gather up my bag before leaving for my classes.

  • • •

  It would be tonight of all nights the last reader takes his sweet time packing up his books. By the time he leaves, I am bouncing on the balls of my feet, clenching my fist to stop me from manhandling him out the building. It didn’t matter how many times I told him we were shutting, it seemed to make him go even slower. Once I’ve turned the key in the lock, I have to run to Daisy and drive faster than normal to get to Captain’s Cabin in time.

  Clear of the bouncer, I push through the crowd that has already gathered to get to our usual table. Everyone is already there, and I slide into the booth, out of breath from rushing. After a hectic day, I’m looking forward to listening to Supercharged play, spending time with my friends, and of course Dominic. No such luck when Iris and Bryan stumble over to our table and Iris flops down beside me, giggling. She’s drunk, like really drunk. I heave a sigh and look at Grace, who raises an eyebrow in surprise.

  “What happened?” I lean over the table, and she shrugs.

  “Dunno. They were like this when they got here, although not as bad.”

  This in not going to be a fun night, seeing as I’m driving and will have to deal with her drunken ass. Iris leans over, pressing all her weight against me.

  “Love you, Charlotte,” she slurs, and I roll my eyes at her.

  “Yeah, love you, too.” I pat her arm and fortunately the lights dim, saving me from more conversation.

  The four of them walk on stage to frenzied cheering, and as Dominic slips his guitar strap over his head, he gives me a wink and a flash of his sexy smile. With just that look, the worries of the past week slip out of my mind. I actually swoon the longer I look at him in his jeans that have a tear mid-thigh and hang off his hips. I give my mind a treat and think of stripping him out of his clothes to trace the v of his hips with my tongue, lower and lower. As rush of heat, hits me and I clench my legs together to stop it. The tight gray t-shirt just fuels my fantasy. He looks a little unsteady as he plugs his guitar in, but then they launch into their first song, “Rewind,” and he bites his bottom lip in concentration. Individually, they are hot, but all of them together…

  Between songs, I look around at the crowd and a few faces that I recognize. I catch the eye of a blond girl who looks vaguely familiar, but I think it is from previous gigs. She sends a sneer in my direction before facing the front with a look of adoration on her face. What the hell was that?

  Maybe it’s just me, because I can’t shake off the funk that I’m in. Ever since my mom's bachelorette party, I haven’t felt like myself. It hasn’t helped that Dominic and I have both been so busy this week—him with extra practice and me with work and studying. But I still feel a distance between us, and I don’t know what to do about it because I have no experience in this. I am so good at shutting people out and telling myself that it doesn’t matter, but with him, it does. I love him, so much it scares me, and I need to figure out how to make this better.

  Between Iris’ drunken weight leaning on me and the blond girl in the crowd who keeps eye fucking my boyfriend, I decide I need to escape.

  “Excuse me,” I mumble and climb over Iris and out from the booth to make my way to the bar. At least it is quieter there and I can think and breathe. Deciding to stick to soft drinks, I order a Diet Coke. I have a feeling I’ll need to take a drunk Iris home at some point and probably Bryan, too.

  I’m nursing my Diet Coke, when the person next to me nudges my arm, taking me by surprise. Although I know many of the people here, I don’t normally engage in conversation while I’m listening to Dominic play. I turn slightly, having a hard time dragging my eyes away from ogling the sexy guitarist in front of me.

  “They’re good.” He nods in the direction of the stage.

  “Yeah, they are.” I smile before turning my attention back to the front.

  “It’s the first time I’ve seen them,” he shouts a little to be heard over the music. Again I smile and nod. It’s hard to carry on a conversation given the volume but he nudges me again and extends his hand.

  “I’m Jack.” I look up at him and take his hand, giving it a small shake. As I withdraw my hand, his index finger runs down the palm of my hand and an easy smile spreads over his lips. Hmm, it’s been a while, but if I’m not mistaken, I’d say this guy is flirting with me. That thought shocks and scares me a little. It’s never happened since I met Dominic; no one even tried after the first night at the party. It was as if everyone knew I was off-limits because we were always together,. Obviously it escaped my attention because no one captured my attention as Dominic did. And I was pleased; I didn’t reinvent myself as a good girl for it to all be undone in the first few weeks of the semester. Even with Dominic, as much as I wanted him, I wouldn’t admit it, not at first anyway. Once he knew I felt the same, he didn’t give up until I finally caved.

  Since then, it’s only ever been Dominic. While I’m not interested in the guy standing next to me flirting, it’s a change from dealing with the bitchy dirty looks I keep getting from the females in the audience. Or listening to Iris’ drunken ramblings or dealing with Dominic’s sudden grumpiness. I look up, he’s still staring at me expecting an answer.

  “Charlotte,” I reply, and he nods, his dark brown eyes sparkle in the dim lighting.

  “Would you like a drink?” He nods at my empty glass and I open my mouth to refuse but why not, it’s only a Diet Coke for god’s sake.

  “Sure, I’ll have another Diet Coke.” He arches his eyebrow in a question, and I laugh.

  “Don’t ask.” With a cheeky wink, he takes my glass and turns to the server. Yes, he’s definitely flirting with me.

  Minutes later, he’s back. “Your drink.” He hands me a tall glass of Diet Coke with ice. “Tell me why you’re drinking Diet Coke?” The corners of his lips tip up into a playful smile that in turn makes me smile.

  “My best friend and her boyfriend are trashed, so I’ll be the one to drive them home. I hate dealing with drunk people.” He nods, as though storing this away for future reference.

  “Do you not get drunk?”

  I laugh. “Not so much now.”

  “Oh.” His eyes widen slightly and his smile grows. He has a cute smile. Now I’m glad I’m not drinking; it wouldn’t do to be getting myself into trouble. With a laugh, I turn to look at him.

  “I… ahh…I used to drink, far too much, and sometimes get myself into situations.” I raise both eyebrows in a you-know-what-I-mean gesture.

  “Ahh.” He smiles and leans down, bringing his mouth closer to my ear so he doesn’t have to shout. “Wish I’d known you then.”

  And my mouth drops open. Time to rein it in, Charlie. This might be a friendly, slightly flirtatious chat to you but you don’t want him to get the wrong idea. I turn my attention back to the stage and I feel his eyes on me for a minute longer before he faces the front, too. Inside I am a little freaked at how easy it is to get carried away. Not that I would ever dream of doing anything. But I can’t help but be flattered that someone is interested in me.

  The set finishes and I set my now empty glass down on the bar. The crowd has started to disperse, and I wait for Jack to move away, but he doesn’t seem in any rush. I see the top of Dominic as he cranes his neck to looks for me. I smile widely and catch Jack w
atching me.

  “Are you waiting for someone?” He looks into the crowd.

  “My boyfriend.”

  “Ah, you have a boyfriend?” Maybe it’s my imagination, but he sounds a little disappointed.

  “Yeah, lead guitarist for Supercharged.” I turn to the side to look at him, and he gives a little shrug.

  “Pity.” He sees Dominic, who is weaving his way over to us. “Nice talking to you, Charlotte.”

  “Thank for the Coke.”

  “Anytime.” He flashes me his cute smile and walks away. Dominic notices our exchange and frowns when his eyes settle on me. Jack claps him on the shoulder as he passes and says something before disappearing into the crowd.

  When Dominic reaches me, I slide my arms around his waist and bury my face into his chest. His arms circle me and he leans down, pressing his lips to my now upturned ones, kissing me slow and deep.

  “Hmm, I’ve missed you,” he murmurs, and I can taste the alcohol on him. It’s not like him to drink when he’s playing, but his behavior has been out of character lately. “Who was that?” His voice grows tight, and I look up at him to find him staring into the crowd, his jaw bunched.

  “His name was Jack.”

  “Jack,” he grinds out. “What did he want?”

  “Nothing. He was here to watch the band.”

  “And?”

  “And he was saying how good you were.”

  “Is that all?” His eyes flash and it dawns on, Dominic’s jealous. I’ve never seen him jealous before. Perhaps annoyed at the way guys have looked at me but never overtly jealous. What’s more, the edge to his voice makes it sounds as if he doesn’t trust me.

  “Yes, that’s all.”

  “He wanted in your panites,” he says with an air of authority.

  “What? No.” I lean back in his arms to look at him properly. There is a possessive glint in his eyes and where that would normally turn me on, his seeming lack of trust is beginning to piss me off. “He talked to me and bought me a Diet Coke-”

  “He bought you a drink?” His eyebrows climb into his hairline and his arms drop from around my shoulders. When he takes a step back, I miss the contact immediately. Suddenly, I don’t like where this is going.

  “It was only a Coke. It wasn’t like he was pouring tequila down my throat and trying to get me drunk.”

  “Doesn’t matter,” he growls.

  “For fuck’s sake, Dominic. I have to watch all the females in the audience eye fuck you on stage, but I’m not allowed to speak to anyone of the opposite sex? That’s hardly fair.”

  “He wanted to do more than talk.” Now he sounds like a petulant child.

  “Dominic. I don’t care; I’m not interested in anyone else.”

  “You would have been before.” At that retort, I suck in a breath and take a step backward, his words a slap in the face, and stare at him in disbelief. I can’t believe he just said that. My hands ball into fists at the side of me.

  “That was before,” I hiss through clenched teeth and see a flash of regret in his eyes, but he doesn’t apologize. Guess I know what he really thinks. Pushing a hand through his hair, he casts his eyes skyward in annoyance. This really is not the time or the place to get into it. Both of us would wind up saying something we regret and don’t necessarily mean.

  “Let’s get this party over with,” he says with a heavy sigh as he reaches for my hand. Our fingers brush as his fingertips curl around mine, but I pull away from his grasp.

  “You go without me.” I stop and dig my heels in.

  “What?” He looks back at me, his eyes growing wide. “I’m not going without you.”

  “I don’t want to go,” I grind out, crossing my arms over my chest so he can’t reach for my hand again.

  “We don’t have to stay for long.” His jaw tightens with determination. And we stand, glaring at each other, the distance between us growing.

  Shit.

  Annoyed at not getting out of the party, I brush past him and stomp out to the parking lot, not bothering to check if he is following me. I don’t stop until I reach Daisy and lean against the driver’s door. Dominic pauses in front of me but then moves to stand next to me. Mirroring my angry stance, he crosses his arms over his chest. An awkward, tense silence settles between us, and I wish Iris and Bryan would hurry up so I can get the fuck out of here and get this party over with. My nerves stretch the longer we don’t speak. When the tension become unbearable I can’t keep quiet.

  “What happened to the guy who came to see you?” I ask.

  “Pete’s making arrangements with him for gigs in the summer,” he says in a sullen voice.

  “It’s definite. You’re going?” I turn to look at him, surprise arching my brows.

  “Looks like it.” He shrugs and digs his hands deep into his pockets.

  “You didn’t say.” Now I sound petulant, but he’s deliberately keeps things from me, or it feels that way. He’s been moody and distant for weeks.

  “You don’t tell me things.” I can hear the sulk in his voice.

  “Like what?”

  “Like wanting to find a job or guys buying you Diet Coke.” He spits out the last part.

  My temper snaps and I whirl to face him. “It was a fucking Coca-Cola. Jeez, get a grip,” I seethe, a further outburst simmers very close to the surface, waiting on one more cross word. I’m not the only one close to losing it. When he glares at me, his look could wilt flowers. For a second I think it’s as though he’s about to come back with something when Iris and Bryan appear, weaving between the cars.

  “Oh, for fuck’s sake,” I fume when I see them moving in our direction.

  “Iris, Bryan, over here,” I shout and without waiting to see if they have heard me, I climb in the car, leaving Dominic to let them into the backseat.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Somehow, I manage to tune out their drunken ramblings while I drive to Pete’s. God knows how because Iris is being loud, and giggly. My grip on the steering wheel tightens. My internal rant drowns out what the two in the back are laughing about. I chance a few sideways looks at Dominic, but his head is firmly fixed out the side window, watching whatever is going on outside.

  Gritting my teeth, I pull into the driveway and kill the engine. Dominic lets Iris and Bryan out, and they are already halfway up the drive before I reluctantly climb out of the car. Dominic slams the door with force, making me wince. Although he hovers, seemingly waiting for me, he is three paces ahead as we walk up the drive, and I make no effort to catch him up. As soon as we pile into the kitchen, Iris and Bryan start drinking beer, while Dominic reaches for a bottle of Jack Daniels that is in amongst the collection on the counter. As if I didn’t already realize that there’s something up with him. There’s an edge to him, and it’s not just in the way he acts, but I can see it in his eyes. I feel a tingle of intuition, and I suddenly don’t want to drink. So I don't.

  Grace comes over to stand beside me as I pour myself yet another Diet Coke.

  “Didn’t see you for the rest of the night.” She leans against the counter but her gaze flicks over to Dominic and Pete sitting at the kitchen table.

  “Yeah, I needed a breather. I was getting looks from some blond girl and then Iris was talking shit. I just needed some space.”

  “I get you.” She chews her lip and turns to me. “You don’t like the attention, do you?”

  “Not really. I get why they are popular, because they are really talented, and all of them are gorgeous, but why do they female fans have to be so catty?”

  “It’s not all of them.”

  “No, I guess not.” I take a sip, determined to make this one last. There is no way I can stomach any more Coke.

  “What do you think about them going on the road?” Seeing my frown Grace rests her hand on my arm. “You are coming, aren’t you?” Her eyes grow wide with excitement and she squeezes me. This is totally out of character for Grace; she’s always so cool, calm and collected. The attention
the band get doesn’t bother her, she takes it all in her stride. But this is a big deal for all of them of course she’s excited.

  “Well…” I look over to where Dominic is mucking about with Zak now and drinking Jack Daniels from the bottle. “We had a of a fight when Dominic first mentioned it, and although he said he wanted me to go, he hasn’t asked me since. So I don’t know.” My gut twists painfully as it hits me,, if he doesn’t want me to go, I’ll have to spend a whole summer without him. As pathetic as it makes me, I don’t know if I can. Then worry takes root about what it means for our relationship if he doesn’t ask me to go with him and goes without me.

  “Of course, he’ll want to you come.” She sounds so certain and I want to believe her.

  I arch my eyebrow in skeptism. “Maybe not. There’s definitely something up with him.”

  She looks over to where he’s sitting, a poker game about to start. “Even Pete’s said that. Like tonight, that’s the type of behavior we got from the old Dominic.” She flashes me a sympathetic smile, but I can’t even muster a reassuring one in response. My heart is busy sinking further and further into my feet at what it means. I was always more concerned about hiding my past, Dominic’s past was never an issue, but now I’m starting to get a glimpse of what he was like then, and my worries have intensified. Maybe I’m not enough for him, maybe he is truly sick of me and my past being thrust into his face. Could our relationship be drawing to a close and he just doesn’t know how to tell me? But it’s at odds with him telling me he loved me this morning. It could be he’s pissed off and wants to get drunk. Either way I vow to find out what the fuck is wrong with him tomorrow; I can’t get into it while he’s drinking or while his friends are here. I’ll have to suck it up until tomorrow.

  Iris’s timing sucks when stumbles through to the kitchen, clutching the doorframe, which is the only thing keeping her upright. I look at Grace and roll my eyes.