Private Show (The Private Series)

by Torella, Danielle

  “I think it’s very sexy.” He runs his nose along my jaw, sending shivers down my body.

  I put my hand on his tight chest and I push him back slightly. I get out of the door and I don’t look back. I take a steadying breath as I head to the front of the stage on the floor to start taking photos before the band goes on.

  I snap photos left and right of the crowd. It’s kind of funny, seeing people dressed so elegantly for a rock show.

  The lights lower and everyone hollers with excitement. Hell, I do too! The drums start on the black stage, then a guitar joins in. When a single light beams straight down the center of the stage Brent is already standing there.

  “I want to thank everyone for coming tonight to spread the word on bullying. Too many kids and teens are tormented and tortured day in and day out, for no good reason,” he says. “The reality is there is no reason to bully anyone. We all have either been the subject of a bully or have bullied someone, sometime or another. Words hurt. Actions hurt. The torment can kill. So stand up! Stand up and help spread the word of the victims who have gone through so much and couldn’t find any other escape, but to take their lives. Because…”

  The music starts to build, “We don’t have to take this!” The music booms and flames shoot up from both side of the stage as they beat out into their single “Bully.”

  They definitely put on a great show and give me more photo opportunities than any other show I have been to.

  Each song reminds me of Ben. Everything we have been through.

  Almost at the end of the show I feel my phone buzz. It’s Kate texting me.

  Head up to the balcony for some high shots.

  You got it, I reply.

  The view from up here is outstanding, between the array of colorful gowns and masks of the people in the crowed, to the constant changing stage lights and pyrotechnics.

  Then it goes pitch black. All music stops. People are quiet.

  This is eerie.

  My favorite Shinedown song, “Miracle,” starts to play. But there’s still no lights or vocals. Then I hear a different voice start to sing.

  “Say it once tell me twice are you certain I’m all right…”

  As I listen, the deep rich Gavin Rossdale sound begins to sound familiar. I am a bit away from the stage so I hold my camera up and zoom in as close as I can get, but it’s still so freaking dark.

  Then a single pink light come on when the chorus picks up, and I gasp.

  Ben. Ben is on stage singing my song.

  I pull my camera from my face and just stare. He looks up at me and points when he belts, “You are the miracle in me.” I reach for my mask and I take it off. I can barely breathe; tears flow down my face.

  He never stops looking up at me.

  The song ends and the lights dim, and he is still on stage. The people on the floor lift up what looks like cell phones and hold them still. Then “I’ll Follow You” starts to play and the phone lights start to sway in unison. But how do they know to do this? At most shows, the singer tells the audience what to do.

  Ben starts to sing again and the lights move in a wave pattern, in time to the song. Just after the chorus, Ben stops singing and the lights go off and all the phones drop. The instruments continue to play. A minute later, Brent starts to sing. And I am slightly disappointed.

  My eyes are glued to the floor. The cell phones are back up as Brent sings on the dark stage. I see nothing but hundreds of lighted screens. It is like they are synchronized; some drop while other stay up in patterns.

  Near the end of the song the lights move. The people are moving in a circle, and then half drop, and the lights spell out “Tess.”

  What the hell is going on?

  I lean over the balcony slightly in awe. The lights start to move in another circle this time when they stop they read:

  Will you marry me?

  I am shaking, I take a step backwards and I feel a body behind me, startled I turn around to find Ben on one knee.

  I gasp and clutch my hand over my mouth.

  He is holding a little black box. He looks up at me. “You are my world. You are my life. You are my permanent. I love you more than what words can describe. Will you please do me the honor of marrying me?”

  He opens the box to reveal a princess-cut diamond on a silver band and there are two little pink diamonds on each side. I feel my cheeks warming from all the tears flowing; I am glad I opted for waterproof makeup.

  I am speechless.

  “Before you say no,” Ben says, “I need to explain something to you.”

  My knees are weak and I drop to the floor in front of him. He takes my hand and looks me in the eyes and starts.

  “I know you left New York because you saw Nicole. You saw her with her hands all over me and me taking her backstage. I didn’t know she was going to be there, she was supposed to mail it…

  “When she kept texting and calling me, she was giving me a hard time about it all. And when you confronted me that night about seeing the texts and missed calls, you drank so much you passed out and forgot about it the next morning. I thought I was in the clear. I didn’t want it to ruin this.”

  He motions between us.

  “Did you sleep with her Ben?” I have to ask. I need to know.

  “No. I would never do that to you, nor would I want to.”

  He inches in closer and rest his hand on my cheek, “I did contact her first, though, but not for sex or to try and get back together, which you probably think…”

  “I know you went to her place. Why? What happened?” I wanted answers and I am finally getting them.

  I see a tear drop from his eye and his voice cracks slightly. “I wanted my Mum’s ring back… She came into Chatz telling me that if I wanted the ring, that I needed to follow her back to her new place here in the city. She seemed like she was giving in and I didn’t think I had to worry. When I got inside she tried to seduce me and I got the hell out of there. Nothing and I mean nothing happened.”

  My eyes widen and I look back down to the ring he is holding in the box and then back up to him. “Let me get this straight… you called Nicole to get the ring you gave her… back?”

  “She wanted me to sleep with her one more time, she thought that, that would change my mind about you and go back crawling to her… It was my Mum’s and she never deserved it. She never deserved me. It took me finding you to realize the man I should be and can be. I have always thought I was never good for anyone, hell, I still have a hard time believing you want me… or is it wanted?” He asks, unsure of my answer to his ultimate question.

  Before I can say anything he explains, “The diamond and band are the original setting, but it was too traditional and you are anything but traditional. That is why I had the two pink diamonds added. It is the perfect combination of Mum, who loved my father and he loved her more than anyone, has loved someone… and you. You are the exception, because no one could love someone as much as I love you… and not being able to tell you any of this all this time has been killing me, but I couldn’t ruin this moment.”

  I bite my lip. “Yes,” I whisper as I reach his mouth.

  “Yes?” he gasps.

  I nod and he attacks my mouth and his hands wrap around the back of my neck and my lower back. “God I have missed you so much,” he says between our kisses.

  “I missed you too.”

  Backing away he pulls the ring out of the box and returns to one knee. “Tess Martin, will you marry me?”

  “Yes! A million times yes!”

  He slips the ring on me and stands up fast, pulling me up with him, and leads me to the edge of the dimly lit balcony. Soft music plays from the stage.

  Leaning over the edge he yells, “She said yes!” And the floor erupts with clapping and catcalls.

  “Come, I want you to meet the guys.”

  I let Ben lead me downstairs and through the backstage area. A couple of the guys recognize Ben and rush him. One of which is Brent. Oh my.<
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  “So she said yes?” he asks Ben.

  Ben holds up my hand to show off my ring, and I blush and try to hide my face with my right hand.

  Brent gives me a big hug, and I think I just squeaked. “He is a great guy, Tess. He has told us all about you. He has been planning this for some time now. When he came to me and told me what he wanted to do, of course I had to say yes.”

  Huh, Brent is a hopeless romantic. That just makes me love him even more.

  “Thank you so much again, man! Obviously it worked.” Ben winks at me.

  I tip my head up and kiss him.

  “Ahhh, all right, lovebirds, go enjoy the ball. We will catch up later.”

  “Ready to party?” Ben asks.

  “With you.” I wink at him and I reach behind him and grab his tight British ass. God, I missed touching him. And I am raging right about now.

  “Why, Miss Martin, are you trying to seduce me?”

  “Yes. Yes I am.”

  He leans down and looks me dead in the eyes. “I love you.”

  I smile the biggest smile of my life. My butterflies have returned full force, but then again I don’t think they ever left. Instead, I trapped them in a glass jar and put them on a top shelf. High enough to see, but not touch or feel.

  I do need to ask him a question, though.

  “Ben?”

  He presses his nose into my hair and kissing the top of my head. “Hmmm?”

  “How were you so certain I would say yes and not move on while we were apart?” I chew on one of my fingernails.

  He leads me into an empty dressing room, “I know you. I knew deep down you trusted me, even though you wouldn’t admit it to me or yourself. I know it was wrong to let you believe what you saw and believed was true.”

  Sitting on a sofa, I crawl onto his lap. I rest my head on his chest and take in his warmth and his masculine scent.

  “We could have been together at your fathers wedding, we could have spent the evening dancing and celebrating. We wasted time.”

  “It was all worth it”. He runs his hand up my leg, “Fuck. You’re wearing garters?” He pushes my dress up to have a look and his mouth pops open. “You got a tattoo?”

  “The same day I got my septum done. It was a spontaneous thing.”

  Running his fingertips over the outline over the mug, he sighs. “I knew you couldn’t stop loving me.”

  I press my hand over his heart, where his tattoo for me is etched into his skin, and tell him, “Never. You are my permanent too, Ben.” I kiss him tenderly.

  He groans. “It feels so good to have you on me and touching me. I have missed feeling you. I missed your voice. I need you.”

  I start to unbutton his shirt and his hand runs up the inside of my thigh, pressing me through my panties.

  “Hold on.” I stand up and I undo the zipper on the back of my dress and let it fall to the floor, revealing my corset.

  “Holy fuck.” He rasps out and he presses his hand to his growing erection. “You are going to make me come over here, just by looking at you. Fuck, it’s been too long!”

  He is on me in one stride. He eagerly cups my breasts and licks up my neck to flick my earring. I reach down to his hard cock and squeeze him though his pants. Ben lets out a deep growl. I deftly undo his pants and reach in.

  “Make love to me,” I pant.

  Ben lifts me into his arms and lays me on the sofa. He drops his pants and removes his shirt, then pulls down the cups of my corset releasing my heavy breasts and pushing them up. He takes one in his mouth and I let out a soft whimper.

  “Ben, I need you in me. I need you now, so badly.”

  He rips my thong into shreds and rubs my oversensitive bud, I lift my hips into his hand and moan. He lifts my legs and wraps them around his waist, and I feel him pressing at my opening. He enters me slowly, lovingly.

  His pace is slow and steady as we stare into one another eyes. I feel myself building fast so I give him a squeeze with my thighs to signal to him I need him deeper and harder. He gives me what I want and I gasp with pleasure.

  Ben growls, “Come with me.”

  “I’m… I’m…”

  “Come on, I am so close, you’re so wet for me and hot. I feel you sucking me in. Come for me, baby.” His words send me over the edge and I can’t contain a scream of ecstasy.

  “Fuuuu…” And with one last deep penetration he pours his hot liquid into me. I have missed this feeling so much.

  The next morning we discuss our living arrangements. Ben wanted me to move right in with him, but I had an even better idea.

  “Why don’t we look at a couple units here in your building? Something that we can both afford together? Keep a hand on your trust fund for a future home?”

  Pulling me close to him he tells me, “You know what? I think that is a perfect idea. How did I get so lucky to find a woman as intelligent and beautiful as you?”

  “Because, you’re one lucky hot British bastard,” I tease him.

  Later that evening we decide to invite Erin and James over to make our announcement.

  “I KNEW IT!” Erin screams at the tops of her lungs, as she lunges at me and nearly knocks me to the floor. “The ring! I need to see the ring!”

  She viciously grabs my finger and sequels with delight, “There are pink stones on this thing! This is too perfect for you! I am so happy for the both of you!”

  “Thank you,” Ben and I say in unison as I rejoin his side… where I am safe from Erin’s grasp. I look to James who has a smile on his face, but I can tell he still has his concerns.

  “James?” I ask.

  He walks over to me and Ben and offers Ben his hand, “Congrats bro, I know you’ll take care of my baby sister… because if you don’t I will come after you.”

  Ben takes my brothers hand and pulls him into a hug, “I wouldn’t expect it any other way. Thanks.”

  “I’ll get it,” Ben announces. When he opens the door he is shocked to see his best friend standing on the other side. “Dan! What are you doing here? Do you have a meeting?”

  Ben steps to the side to let him in and man, does he look like shit. Not the cleaned up hottie I met before.

  “Hey Dan,” I greet him. But he doesn’t say anything, but just waves. Huh, some things not right.

  “Hey man, what’s going on? You look like you’ve been through the wringer.” Ben asks, genuinely concerned.

  Dan leans in, “Can we talk?”

  “Sure, want to do it in my study?”

  “Yeah,” Dan answers and walks past the kitchen through the hall.

  “Excuse me, for a moment. I’ll be right back.”

  Erin looks to me, “Do you have any clue what that was about?”

  I shrug.

  “Hey, so what’s up? What brings you into the city?” I ask my obviously troubled friend.

  Dan paces the floor in the small space of my study, “I need to tell you something, but I don’t know how to.”

  Now I am getting worried, “What happened? You’re not back on drugs again are you? I know you got real bad after Jackie.”

  “No, I’m not.” He grabs his head in frustration.

  “Well, will you at least sit the fuck down, because you’re making me anxious.”

  He stops, but refuses to sit, “If I don’t tell you now then I am going to feel like an asshole my whole life…”

  “Get on with it then. It can’t be that bad, now can it?” But it’s Dan, I know how bad it can be and that’s what scares me.

  He backs up to the door, peaks out and closes it the rest of the way, “What I am going to tell you, I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I was told some fucked up news and didn’t take it the way I should have. Know I am sorry.”

  I just stare at him blankly, waiting for him to get on with his point.

  “When I came into town I was nervous about running into Jackie as you know. Well I did and she was with this blonde douche in a suite and she told me some disturbing news.
”

  Fuck! I know what he’s going to say too. The day at the market when I got arrested, the couple threatened to tell Dan that I had slept with Jackie when they were together. “I know what you’re going say man.”

  “You slept with Jackie when we were still together?” Sure as hell they told him.

  “No, our friendship means more to me than to fuck it up by sleeping with my buds girl and you know that.”

  He nods his head, “I do know that now, but when I first heard the news I was raged. Completely pissed off. I wanted to hurt you back.”

  “Dan?”

  He reaches the back of his head and tugs on his neck, “First I thought I’d make a move on Tess, but then I saw how she looked at you and I knew I had no chance in hell. Shit the girl laughed at me when I tried to flirt.”

  “Where are you going with this Dan?” I can’t even think about what he is going to say. I have known Dan far too long and know that he can be a loose cannon.

  “So I went after the next person you love most. Caroline.”

  “You did what? What did you do to my baby sister? What the fuck!” I am yelling at who is supposed to be my best friend through thick and thin. He helped me when I moved here. We grew up together pretty much. Had each other’s backs.

  I hear a knock on the door, “Ben? What’s going on?” I hear Tess.

  All I see is red right now and I grab Dan by the throat. “What did you do?” I growl at him.

  “I flirted and led her on. When you asked me to take her home I thought it was the perfect opportunity, to hurt you like I thought you hurt me.”

  I can feel my fingers start to tighten around his neck and he starts to gasp. I let him drop to the floor against the door. I hear Tess yell in muffled tones as my blood pressure is spiking.

  “Tell me what you did!”

  He slowly gets to his feet and looks me in the eye like a man, “We made out. We kissed a bit and I felt her up and…”

  “You touched her?” I am in his face again.

  “A little… But it didn’t go far I swear! She wanted me to though Ben and that’s what brought it back into focus. She what fifteen, sixteen now? That’s too young to want that attention from a guy my age.”