Pulse (Collide)

by Gail McHugh

  Grinning, Gavin slowly pulled her skirt down and tossed it on the floor. Blue eyes locked on hers, he bit his luscious lip, his finger tracing just below her belly button. “The only thing you need to know, Miss Cooper, is Dillon is very, and I mean very, aware of every single thing I’m about to do to your beautiful body.”

  Without another question, Emily spent the rest of the afternoon indulging in the mind blowing things Dillon apparently knew were going to happen to her.

  “Is the blindfold really necessary?” Emily asked as Gavin led her down the hall. “I get it’s a surprise, but your excitement is actually scaring me. Did you paint it black?”

  “Have you no faith in my decorating skills?” Gavin asked with a chuckle. Opening the door to the nursery, he popped a smile as he took one last look at the finished room. He couldn’t call it his decorating skills since a team of highly paid interior designers did all the work. Nevertheless, he was happy with the direction he’d given them over the last month since finding out the baby was a boy. “And yes, the blindfold is needed. But I’ll strike up a deal with you. As my torturous punishment, I’ll allow you to reuse it on me later tonight.”

  Emily giggled and went to rip off the blindfold, but Gavin grabbed her wrists. Lips turned down in a pout, she sighed. “You get off on being a wiseass. I swear you were placed in my world for that very reason.”

  “Mmm, I never thought of it like that.” Gavin buried his face in the crook of her neck, his voice seductively low. “Placed on this earth to wiseass your world up.”

  “Gavin Christopher Blake, if you don’t let me take off this blindfold, I’m going to do things to your ass no man would appreciate. Got it?”

  Gavin let out a deep, throaty laugh, his eyes wide. “You’re turning me on.”

  “Oh my God. You seriously—”

  “I know. Have lost my mind or seriously have gone crazy.” Gavin nibbled her neck. “Which is it, sweets?”

  “Both.”

  “Good answer.” He peeled the blindfold from her eyes. “Tell me. Did I lose my mind on this?”

  The breath left Emily’s lungs as her eyes swept over the nursery. True to his love of the team, Gavin had turned the once bare room into a Yankees paradise. Not quite overkill, it was tastefully done and could easily thrive well into her son’s teenage years. Emily’s gaze fell upon a single navy blue wall with massive white built-in shelving units. Each held an array of glass-encased signed baseballs, trading cards, and hats. She took in everything from autographed jerseys hanging on cast-iron Yankees emblem hooks, to a real digital scoreboard, to a row of Yankees metal lockers. One wall showcased a floor-to-ceiling black and white scene of the field right out of the early Yankees days. “The House Ruth Built” graced the top of the mural. She swore it was a real photo. Just beyond one of the windows—swathed in long, navy blue drapes—was a soft, brown leather chair with fluffy baseball pillows. A New York City backdrop circular rug covered a good portion of the space. To top it off, he had actual stadium seats in the room. Emily was struck speechless.

  “Did I lose my mind?” Gavin whispered, his chin on Emily’s shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her growing stomach, wishing he could see her face. “Or am I just crazy?”

  Falling into the gravity of everything that made Gavin who he was, Emily faced him, her world spinning on an axis of love he provided. So many stolen moments and little things he’d said and done passed through her mind as she stared into his smiling blue eyes. Those thieving blue eyes that’d snatched her breath, heart, and soul the second she saw him. So many words, spoken and unspoken, echoed through her ears. This man, her best friend and lover, who didn’t know if the child she was carrying was his, kept the promise he’d made not so long ago. He already loved her baby, whether or not it was his, because it was part of her. God willing, part of him. Bringing her hands to his dimpled cheeks, she stared at him a beat longer before pushing up on her tiptoes. As her lips melted against his, she wondered how she’d gotten so lucky. Why, out of every woman in the world, did this certified wiseass pick her?

  Slowly breaking the kiss, she looked at him, her mind in a daze. “I don’t even know how to thank you, Gavin. You’ve accepted me with every fragile weakness I have, loving me no less than a woman without faults. A woman without fears. Every look, touch, and kiss you’ve given without judgment of any kind. You’ve healed every exposed wound, old scar, and piece of pain I brought into this relationship without expecting anything in return. You’ve shown me what a racing heart feels like, shown me mere thoughts could easily cease with a single kiss. You’ve shown me what it is to feel truly, wholeheartedly, until the end of time loved. How do I thank you for all of this?”

  “You do every single day,” he softly answered, stroking her hair.

  Emily closed her eyes. “How?” She leaned into the heat of his touch.

  “Look at me, Emily.” She opened her eyes, her watery gaze searching his. “Right there, doll. You said every look I’ve given you was without judgment. Well, every look you’ve given me is untouched, pure in all it is for my eyes. You look at me like you’ve never seen a man before. There’s no way for me, as a man, to ever explain what that feels like.” He reached for her hand and laid it against his heart. “You said every touch I’ve given was without judgment. Every time you touch me, your hands shake. You have no idea how that makes me shake. I’m not talking sexually, either. You shake everything I’ve ever know myself to be.”

  Pulling her closer, he ghosted his mouth against hers. “And every kiss? Jesus, don’t even get me started on the way you kiss me. From the first kiss we shared that you stopped”—he softly bit her lip, sucking it between his teeth—”to this kiss right now, you sink me. You make love to me with every kiss. You confirm what this wiseass knew the second he laid eyes on a beautiful waitress with food splattered all over her uniform. I hate using the same lines, but your lips were made for mine. Which means each kiss was made for me. Each time you look at me the way you do, lay a shaky hand on my body, or your soft lips touch mine, you make me thank God for being a man. That’s how you thank me every day, and that’s the way I hope you continue to thank me for the rest of my life.”

  Once again struck speechless, Emily wrapped her arms around his neck, bringing him down for a kiss. She had a feeling she’d experience countless “struck speechless” moments with Gavin.

  “Mmm. See? You just made love to me with that kiss.” Gavin grinned, reaching for Emily’s hand and leading her out of the nursery.

  “I like that term. I make love to you with my kisses.”

  “Yes, ma’am, you do.” Gavin winked and grabbed his keys from the kitchen counter. “Now you have me wanting to do nothing but stay home all day so I can continue to get some good ol’ lovin’. I’m about to cancel this little outing.”

  Emily giggled and plucked a soft, knit cardigan from the closet. Opting for comfortable flats instead of her gorgeous Stuart Weitzman heels, she sat on the couch and glanced at Gavin while she slipped them on. His suggestion of canceling was becoming more appealing by the second. With his Yankees cap pulled down to his brows, he looked extremely edible swathed in dark blue jeans, a fitted graphic T-shirt, and a pair of Chucks. Emily bit her lip and moved toward her eye candy.

  “We can’t cancel,” she said, tossing on her cardigan. The words came out like a pout as she accepted her purse from him. “We’re meeting them at noon, and it’s almost a quarter after eleven.” She reached for his hand and dragged him to the door. If they didn’t get out of there soon, they’d never leave. “Good ol’ lovin’ later, Mr. Blake.” She smiled as she waited in the hall while he groaned, punching in the security code.

  It was all good though. She kept him happy by “making love” to him several times on their way down in the elevator.

  A slight mid-April chill bit at Emily, spreading goose bumps over her skin as she and Gavin climbed from her car into the bright sun. Either way, spring in New York was beautiful as the city awoke from
a long, hard winter. Not that the city wasn’t always alive and well, but the streets held a sense of renew as everything else came back to life. From store owners propping open their doors to let fresh air sweep through their buildings to the trees in every park springing with colorful buds, the center of the world roared her existence with the change of season. It was also something Emily had grown to love.

  Locking hands with Gavin, Emily peered into several storefronts as they made their way down Lexington Avenue. Stopping just shy of 74th Street, her gaze fell on a form-fitting summer dress displayed on a mannequin. Hands poised on her hips, the offender wore the dress on her plastic body far better than any top paid model. Emily looked at her growing stomach and sighed.

  “What’s wrong?” Gavin asked, his eyes moving between her and the offender.

  “That’s beautiful, and I’m never going to fit into anything like it again.” She continued walking toward Giggle, a posh baby boutique Colton and Melanie suggested they check out. “I’ll be lucky if I’ll fit into Hefty garbage bags after I give birth.”

  Gavin came to an abrupt stop. He cupped Emily’s cheeks, a wide grin plastered across his face. “If you’re wearing a Hefty garbage bag or a bikini, you’ll still look shmexy.” He popped a kiss on her forehead. “A hundred pounds or five hundred pounds, I’m still gonna love ya.”

  “You say that now. Let’s see if you’re saying the same thing when you have to special order me clothing to fit around my ass.” Emily lifted an incredulous brow. “Better yet, let’s see if you’re saying the same thing while trying to pull the garbage bag off my extra-large, naked body.”

  A slow smile crept across Gavin’s lips. “You know you’re turning me on, right?”

  Emily giggled and reached for his hand. “I’m making an appointment for you with a psychiatrist when we get home.” Weaving down the crowded sidewalk, she spotted the boutique a few doors away. “It’ll be good for you and your obsession. I really think you need one.”

  Gavin opened the door to the boutique, giving Emily a light swat on her ass as she walked in. “And I really think if you keep talking about your large or small naked body, I’m going to need a cold shower.”

  Emily shook her head, but before she could throw a comeback at him, she caught Teresa’s gaze.

  Beaming, Teresa ran toward Emily, her arms spread wide. “Emmy!” Emily knelt down and pulled her in for a hug. “Mommy, look! Emmy and Uncle Gaffin’s here!”

  Gavin’s forehead crinkled as his sister-in-law approached. “You guys didn’t tell them we were meeting you?”

  “Yeah, right.” Melanie rolled her eyes. “You’ll learn very soon. Never. Ever tell a child something ahead of time. They would’ve bugged us to death while we waited for you.”

  Gavin gathered an equally excited Timothy in his arms. “Are your parents keeping things from you two?”

  Timothy pouted, wagging an accusing finger at his father. “Yes! Daddy said he was bringing us to Mickey D’s, but then he brought us here. We never knew you was comin. Will you bring us to Mickey D’s, Uncle Gaffin?”

  Gavin swooshed his hand though Timothy’s blond hair. “Heck yeah, I’ll bring you to Mickey D’s. Uncle Gaffin’s a sucker for girls named Molly and greasy French fries.” Emily stood and smiled. “And always remember, kid, you’re the one who controls mom and dad. They may be bigger, but you hold more power than you realize. They’re actually afraid of you two. Your dad tells me that every day.”

  Timothy curled his lips over his teeth and roared like a lion in Colton’s direction.

  Colton shook his head. “Nice one, bro. You’re the hero for the day, and you’ve exposed every parent’s worst nightmare. Wait. You know what they say about payback.”

  Gavin lifted a brow, his smile devious. “Ah, well, consider it my payback for the many years of torment you put me through.” He handed Timothy over to Colton, his laugh as devious as his smile. “Don’t worry, I’ll cover the Big Macs.”

  Colton looked at Emily, a smirk coating his mouth. “You’re sure you’re ready to hang out with this knucklehead for a while? He might drive you nuts.”

  “Who him?” Emily flicked her thumb in Gavin’s direction. “Oh, he drives me nuts, but believe it or not, I’m the one with the control. He may be bigger and more powerful, but he’s most definitely afraid of me. I’ll have him trained up real good sooner than later.”

  Gavin chuckled, his eyes wide. “Oh really?”

  “Yes really,” she answered, sliding her arm around his back. “Don’t try to act cool in front of them, Blake. You know it’s true.”

  Melanie hooted a laugh. “I love it! I knew there was a reason I liked you, Emily. That’s right. Never let these Blake boys think they’ve got you.” She nudged her hip against Gavin’s. “You’re going to be domesticated so quick, you’re not going to know which way is up or down.”

  Gavin looked at Colton, his voice deadpan. “Remind me to keep my girl away from your wife.”

  With a restless Timothy squirming in his arms, Colton shrugged. “You’re already doomed, bro. They’re having lunch with mom next weekend. Make it easy on yourself and already have the apron on when she gets home. If not, she’ll start withholding really important… physical play time from you.”

  On that note, Gavin tossed his arm around Emily’s neck, smiled warmly, and started rubbing her belly. “Darling, sweetheart, love of my life, I believe we have some clothes shopping to get done. Shall we?”

  “I think we shall,” Emily concurred with her own smile.

  “Cool.” Gavin nodded and looked around. “Which way is the clothing?”

  Colton jerked his head to the side. “Just past the nursery décor. To the right of the stuffed animals and a few feet away from the activities center.”

  Gavin stood mute, staring at his brother.

  “Bro, I’ve got two kids and a wife.” Colton shrugged, his green eyes shimmering. “I’m as domesticated as they come.”

  Gavin grinned and grabbed Emily’s hand, leading her toward whatever direction Colton just thoroughly explained. Gavin took in bursts of every pastel and primary color imaginable as they navigated the large boutique. He also took in every type of infant bath tub, bouncy seat, and diaper bag available. He glanced at Emily, who appeared overwhelmed by her surroundings. With smiling lips, he stopped moving.

  “What?” Emily asked.

  He brought his hand to her nape, his touch gentle. “Are you okay?”

  She shook her head, tears springing in her eyes. “No, I’m not.” And she wasn’t. Between Gavin completing the nursery, her growing belly, and her increasing fear of becoming a mother, she was turning into a mental ball of nerves. A certified basket case. She swiped her hand across her cheeks and plucked a tiny newborn outfit from a rack. “Do you see how small this is, Gavin?”

  Oh shit. Now Gavin was overwhelmed by her response. He nodded, careful not to upset her. “I do.”

  She sniffled. “That means the little person wearing it is going to be as small as it is. I’ve never held a baby. I have no idea how to feed him. He could starve. I’ll have no idea why he’s crying. What if he hates me?” Gavin went to speak, but she continued. Her words zipped from her mouth faster than a flash of lightning. “I won’t know how to burp him. What if I drop him while giving him a bath? The state will take him away from me. What happens if I don’t hear him in the middle of the night?” Pausing, she sucked in a breath and really broke down. “And those ointments. What if I don’t put enough on him and he gets a rash? What if I put on too much and he gets an infection? What am I talking about? I don’t even know how to change a diaper. Is he going to be laying on the changing table naked with too much or not enough ointment because his mother doesn’t know how to get the diaper on him?”

  Holy. Mother. Of. God.

  Gavin blinked, swallowed hard, and slowly dragged his hand from her nape. He’d always known how to handle Emily. Shit, he was placed on the earth to do just that. But the woman before him wa
s losing it. Thinking fast, he tossed his hand through his hair and took a shot at the only thing he thought might calm her. “Sit down on the floor with me.”

  Teary eyes wide, Emily furrowed her brows. “What? You want me to sit on the floor with you in a store?”

  Gavin sat cross-legged on the maple floor and motioned her down. “Emily, we almost had sex on the hood of my car on the side of a road in Mexico. Sit.”

  Shocked, Emily nervously glanced at shoppers looking at Gavin as though he’d lost it. But she’d always known he was a tad bit crazy. After a few seconds, she sank to the floor, sitting cross-legged in front of him.

  He twined his fingers through hers. With caring eyes and a warm smile, he softly kissed her lips. “Hey,” he whispered.

  A weak smile lifted her mouth. “Hey.”

  “My name’s Gavin Blake, and I’m going to school you on babies, okay?”

  Emily nodded, looking down at their hands. “You’re trying to get me to stop bugging out.” She brought her gaze back to his, her heart melting. “Aren’t you?”

  “I am, and I will. Give me five minutes. Good?”

  She bit her lip, focusing on his eyes. “Okay.”

  Pulling her hands into his lap, Gavin sighed in relief. She was already coming down a notch. “First: Babies are easy to hold. They… trust right away. They know you’re there to take care of them. The moment you see him, Emily, you won’t be able to help it. Your arms will automatically know what to do. I guarantee you’ll never want to put him down. You’re so caring and nurturing. It’ll come naturally to you.” He leaned over and placed another slow kiss on her lips. “Okay?”

  She nodded, trusting him.

  “Two: When he cries, he’s only crying for a few reasons. Either he’s hungry, tired, sick, colicky, needs to be burped, needs to be changed, or wants to be held. Or in your case, you’ve dropped him and he’s in severe pain, or you didn’t know how to change him and he’s been lying in a pissy, shitty diaper all day.”