Skin

by Dale Mayer

  He pulled the desk chair back far enough to be able to sit down. He leaned forward slightly and clicked through the images in her program. He studied each one carefully, stopping longer at one or two then moving past several as if they weren’t as visually impressive. She knew they weren’t all good, but she had to have something to start with.

  He came to the end and studied the last one, the picture where he’d completed his workout, the pain, the suffering, but also the gain he’d achieved on so many levels.

  “You’re very intuitive.”

  She started. That’s the last thing she’d expected. “Pardon?”

  He waved at the pictures. “In fact, I’d have to say you’re very gifted.”

  He’d surprised her, too. “I’m good, but not that good.”

  He snorted. “You see more behind a lens than you give yourself credit for.” He clicked back a couple of pictures. “While you were taking pictures, I couldn’t think of what you’d possibly find interesting when I was repeating the same movements over and over again. But you weren’t taking pictures of the movements, but of me as I went through them.”

  She stared at him. “So? What else was I to take pictures of?”

  He grinned. “That’s what I was trying to figure out. You captured more of me in these images than I thought was there to see.”

  He stood up. “On top of it all, the play of light and dark is interesting.”

  “We’re supposed to do a theme of some kind, a journey.” She studied the thumbnail pictures lined up in neat rows on the folder and twisted her lips. “There’s not much there to go on.”

  “No,” he said in a deep voice. “But I suspect there’s enough.”

  He walked to the door.

  She trailed behind him. “Does that mean you understand the instructions Jenna gave us? About a theme?”

  “It means that I think I’m beginning to.” He looked down at her. “Get some sleep, Tinkerbelle. You’re going to need it.”

  Then he was gone.

  Chapter 9

  The next morning dawned bright and early. Tania woke up with Kane on her mind, which was to be expected, although the dreams had bordered on erotic but in a fantasy way. Not realistic, and that was also to be expected. The man wasn’t for her, and a relationship wasn’t likely to happen, therefore her subconscious had kept it in fantasy. But she could still dream.

  Throwing back the covers, she remembered her early morning meeting with Jenna, and damn if she wasn’t going to be late. She threw on clothes and ran.

  At the coffee shop, Jenna sat with a pot of tea at her side, an open notebook in front of her and a look of concentration on her face.

  Tania almost hated to interrupt.

  As if sensing her presence, Jenna lifted her head and caught sight of Tania. A smile broke across her face.

  Tania admitted that a smile from her stunning professor was like being brushed by a ray of sunshine. Tania didn’t know Jenna’s story, but somehow she’d arrived at a beautiful place in her life, and it showed.

  Tania took a seat at Jenna’s table. “Sorry I’m late.”

  Jenna shrugged. “If being late meant you had a good night’s sleep, then there’s no loss. It’s not as if I’ve been waiting long.”

  The waiter arrived then, giving Tania a chance to order coffee and something to eat. She had an appetite, she realized with surprise. She’d expected to be so overwrought this morning that food wouldn’t sit well, but instead she felt fine. Great, in fact.

  “You look well this morning,” Jenna said, a look of pleased surprise on her face. “Obviously, this week isn’t stressing you out too badly.”

  Tania gave her a quirky smile. “Actually, it is, but in ways I hadn’t expected. I also hadn’t expected to feel so upbeat this morning, but there you have it.”

  With that, the two women started a discussion of yesterday’s homework. When done, Tania understood a discussion of Kane and the project would likely be next. That sent a tremor through her. She had so much to say, yet she wasn’t ready to say anything.

  “How did yesterday afternoon go?”

  “It was good.” Tania grinned. “I enjoyed having a camera in my hand again. Kane is a great subject,” she said, warming to the topic. “Some of the pictures are really unique.”

  “Excellent.” Jenna smiled as she poured herself a cup of tea. “What have you learned so far?”

  “He’s easy to photograph; the camera loves him.” She went into a discussion about trying to capture the different looks she’d seen in his eyes, the control he had and the drive to keep working out even when his muscles trembled with the effort.

  “He’s quite a man,” she added soberly. “I don’t know why he’s here, but he’s been very easy to work with.” She added thoughtfully, staring out the window, “Maybe too easy.”

  “What makes you say that?”

  “I think he sees me as damaged and himself as whole.”

  Jenna paused in the act of lifting her teacup to her mouth. “Interesting.”

  “He is. It’s like he’s only here on sufferance, but he’s willing to do this if it will help me. But it won’t help him because he doesn’t have stuff. No…” Tania stopped. “More as if he has stuff to deal with, but this workshop isn’t likely to help him deal with it, so he’ll help me out in order to get through the week.”

  Jenna’s eyes twinkled. “Another interesting observation.”

  Tania grinned. “All I’m doing is observing Kane.”

  Jenna stayed suspiciously quiet on that comment. Breakfast was served then, and the topic went to more general topics. Before she’d realized it, Tania was once again seated at the round table in the seminar room, waiting for the other attendees to show up.

  And then Kane walked in.

  Her spine rippled with awareness. She knew Kane had just walked in, and yet she hadn’t even seen the man yet. She couldn’t help the big smile on her face. She was both happy and excited, loving the feelings that lit her nerve endings along with the awareness of what was. This was all good, just as Jillian had said. It was good to feel this way; it felt right. As if she was finally normal in some way.

  “Mind if I sit here?” Kane said, standing beside her. She smiled up at him, “No problem. There might be room.” In fact, the chairs were bunched on the other side of her, leaving an abnormally large space for him.

  He winked at her then sat down. Her gaze widened. She straightened up, thankful Jenna appeared just then to start their day off.

  By noon, Tania was tired and cranky. There was nothing like listening to others talk about progress in their lives to make her feel like she’d made none. Regardless of how much progress she’d managed to create, it didn’t look like it was enough. They broke for lunch and would resume working on their projects right after. Instead of eating, Tania headed outside for some fresh air. One of the men had several positive, uplifting stories to tell. She’d cheered with him and had fallen silent with the remaining members of the class when Jenna had asked if anyone else had something they wanted to share.

  Yes, she wanted to share her news. She wanted to scream it out loud to anyone who’d listen. Her body was reacting like a normally functioning woman. She’d been in lust for her first time, felt that keen edge of a sword blade of attraction across her soul. It was good stuff – great stuff.

  But it wasn’t exactly shareable news.

  “Not hungry?”

  Tania turned. Kane had followed her out. “I just wanted some fresh air.”

  “In that case, why don’t you grab your camera and we’ll carry on where we left off and grab a bite to eat later?”

  She opened her shoulder bag to show him the contents. “Already got it.”

  “Perfect.” He walked down the pathway, and Tania raced to catch up. “Where do you want to go?”

  “Out,” came the laconic reply.

  “Yeah, well, you’ve accomplished that today.”

  “I have. What’s the next goal then? Ye
sterday, we followed my day. Today, we’ll follow your day.”

  “Ha, in that case, we’d be studying all day.”

  He winced. “Then we’ll need to find a midpoint between us.”

  “It’s beautiful outside. We could just walk.”

  “There’s a nice little Chinese restaurant down the boulevard a bit. How about we walk to our lunch?”

  Feeling like they were sneaking away on a private lunch, Tania quickly agreed. She stopped just short of calling it a date in her head even though she really wanted to.

  “Of course, you’ll need to keep clicking that damn camera.”

  “I can walk, talk, and take pictures.”

  “Wow, a modern woman.” His voice was teasing.

  With light-hearted banter setting the tone, she took several pictures as he walked, having him stop and stand a few times so she could capture him with specific backgrounds. By the time they’d reached the restaurant, they were both arguing comfortably and Tania realized something else. It was the first time she’d spent any time alone in a man’s company, and they’d been talking like old friends.

  It was comfortable. Nice.

  She didn’t want it to end.

  *

  “Lunch was good, but I think I ate too much.” Tania bounced at his side. Given their size difference, she had to almost run to keep up. “You barely ate,” he scoffed.

  “Ha, just because I’m not the size of a small mountain doesn’t mean I didn’t eat a lot.”

  He rolled his eyes. “Like I haven’t heard that before.”

  “Sorry, I’m not used to this type of kibitzing.” Her lips twisted wryly. “I need more practice.”

  That’s when it hit him. She wasn’t used to anything male-related. Talking like this, taking pictures, having a meal with a man. He half-suspected she’d never been on a date in her life. What he’d taken for fear had likely been just nervousness of being alone around males in general. She’d relaxed now, comfortable in his company.

  Good.

  “So, now what?”

  “I don’t know. We’re about twenty minutes from the hotel, but you haven’t taken many pictures yet. This means we have more homework to do.”

  She grew quiet at his side as they walked.

  “What are you thinking?”

  “I got a lot of pictures when you were working out, but I didn’t get a couple that I’d been trying for.”

  “So you want me to go work out again?” Fine with him. Being around her was sending his libido off the wall. A workout would chase some of it back down to normal levels. Exhaust him so he could sleep at night. For all that he’d slept, his dreams had been heavy with Tinkerbelle content, and not in an innocent way. There had been nothing childish about those dreams.

  “I don’t know how often you work out. Maybe you don’t do it every day, in which case, I’ll wait until tomorrow.”

  “Except we’re not going to have many days left.”

  She winced. “In that case…”

  “Right, then back to my room to get my gear on.”

  “I’ll meet you in the fitness room.”

  He slid her a sideways glance and realized she was trying to avoid being in his room. Too bad. That was starting to be the number one place he wanted her to be.

  Chapter 10

  The fitness room was empty when Tania arrived. She’d been hoping it would be, not sure how she’d handle being watched as she photographed Kane working out.

  She hadn’t lied to him when she’d told him she’d missed a few images she’d hoped to have captured. Several of the images she’d kept were close but weren’t good enough in her estimate. He gave so much of himself to his goals that she could do no less in her attempt to capture the same intensity of his expression.

  She sat down and systematically went through the contents of her bag, mentally shifting through the options to take the best images. Being inside limited the experience – she’d love to have him swimming in a lake. See the water droplets run off his skin in the moonlight. This set of stills appeared to be all about light and dark. She paused, lifted her head, and considered the homework assignment. That could be the theme. It was certainly the essence showing through the images. When Kane walked into the room ten minutes later, she asked him.

  “Light and dark?” he frowned as if considering it.

  “Think of the images I showed you last night. And the way light plays on your skin, your muscles as they move. The reflections,” she said encouragingly. “Can’t you see it?”

  “Fitness is more like it. I can see that as a theme.”

  She paused and slowly repacked her bag as she thought about it. He’d been joking, she’d been sure, but maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea.

  “I’m doing mostly legs today,” he warned.

  She stared at him then shrugged. “As that means nothing to me, I’ll learn as you work.”

  And boy, did she learn.

  He did a warm-up that had her aching with sympathy, and then he started doing lunges, squats, and a mess of other exercises she couldn’t begin to understand. In an attempt to anticipate his muscles moving and bunching at the right time to catch with her camera, she bent, crouched, kneeled, and twisted in positions she couldn’t normally get into to catch the right shots.

  By the time he shifted to using a huge long bar with weights on either end, he’d settled into a comfortable rhythm and her body was starting to ache.

  “How can you do this all the time?”

  “I like it. I like to feel my body working at peak performance. It’s a fine-tuned machine and like any machine, it needs to be worked out.”

  “I’m sore just from taking pictures,” she muttered.

  “Good. Helps you to remember you have muscles.”

  “Ha. I do yoga all the time.”

  “Good for you. I don’t bend and twist well.”

  “Like this?” She put her camera down, stood in front of him, then bent forward from the waist while wrapping her right arm behind her to curl around her waist on the opposite side.

  “See, now that’s not normal.” He shook his head but bent forward and tried to imitate her. His huge biceps didn’t allow his arm to move well behind his back, and his palm could only go to his spine.

  She grinned. “See those of us that can, do.”

  “Smart ass.” Good-naturedly, he squatted to lift his bar.

  She marveled at the cords running up and down his neck as he added more and more weights.

  “How is this a leg workout?”

  “It’s now an all-over exercise, but the legs get a hell of a workout,” he said when he could. “You’ve been taking pictures, which muscles are showing up the most?”

  She waited until he lifted again and took a serious look. His quads looked like rippled granite, his arms almost the same. Without a shirt on as he’d taken that off some time ago, his six-pack popped out like crazy.

  “It’s so hard to say. All of you.” She walked around behind him, loving the way his neck muscles worked and the shine that highlighted the hills and valleys of his body.

  “Do you do these exercises all the time?”

  “No. I have to work with what’s here. Normally, I have someone who spots for me. So I’m doing only basic lifts here.”

  She nodded, preferring he didn’t do anything that was dangerous. She might be able to lift the empty bar, but with all those discs on the end…she wouldn’t be able to even roll it off him.

  With his next set of lifts, the sweat started to pour. She watched as one bead rippled down his neck. Then another rolled off his spine.

  Her camera went crazy.

  And she knew she had to do something else.

  She reached out and touched one on the side of his face.

  *

  A second tiny drop of sweat rolled off his forehead to bounce onto his shoulder. Tania stood transfixed. Why?

  “What’s wrong?” Kane asked. He grabbed his towel and wiped the rest of the sweat off his
forehead. He’d been working up a hell of a sweat this time. It seemed worse today. After last night. After seeing the pictures, he couldn’t really explain it. It had been such an intimate look into him – his life, his body. It didn’t bother him like a pervert watching him might have done. Knowing Tania was getting turned on was a hell of a turn on for him, too.

  “Nothing,” she said, her voice husky.

  He snorted. “Well, something obviously is. Spill.”

  Mutely, she shook her head. “No. I’m fine. Sorry.”

  With a disgusted sound, he grabbed the bar again. He needed to do an extra rep, and that pissed him off. But better another rep than forcing the issue between them. There were too many damn issues between them.

  And none of them solvable.

  He’d been working up a sweat for a bit now. It felt good setting his rhythm, working his body, pushing it to do what it was meant to do.

  Then she did something that caught the breath in the back of his throat.

  She reached out and scooped up a drop of sweat onto her finger.

  His groin tightened.

  And damn if she didn’t lick her finger.

  He slowly lifted his gaze from her finger to her eyes. Their gazes caught and held.

  Talk about a come on. But in her eyes, there was only curiosity and shock, and as he stared, he could see…desire.

  Chapter 11

  Tania couldn’t believe she’d just done that. And in front of him, no less. She might have gotten away with it if his back was turned to her or he was so busy as to not have noticed, but not this way. She swallowed hard.

  God, she wanted him. There was no way to hide it now. He knew. He had to know. How could he not?

  Fatalistically, she waited for him to speak.

  “My room or yours?” he said, his voice deep, thick.

  She closed her eyes and swallowed hard.

  “Can’t handle a direct approach?” he mocked, anger biting his tone.

  Tears clogged her throat. Damn it. “You’re probably right,” she said in shame. She closed her eyes and shook her head. After a long, shaky breath, she said, “Sorry,” her voice faint, barely above a whisper. “I can’t.”