Equivocal Death

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Equivocal Death Page 33

by Amy Gutman

“Are you okay?” Kate asked.

  12

  Howell quickly looked up, the smile returned to his face.

  13

  “Sorry,” he said. “I was thinking about something else. Something 14

  I have to do tonight.”

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  16

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  After polishing off her food, Kate followed Howell a short way 18

  down Main Street to a small gallery. A slim, blond woman stood up 19

  from a small desk to greet them. Her smile widened when she saw 20

  Howell.

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  “Sam. Good to see you!”

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  Howell turned to Kate. “I’d like you to meet Virginia Cava-23

  naugh, the owner of this wonderful place. Ginny, this is Kate 24

  Paine. She came out from the city today.”

  25

  Kate smiled and extended her hand. Cavanaugh was elegantly but 26

  simply dressed in black pants and a white silk shirt. There were a few 27

  faint lines around her eyes. Still, she didn’t look much over thirty.

  28

  The gallery was airy and bright, with polished light wood floors.

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  There appeared to be several rooms. “Have you been here long?”

  30

  Kate asked.

  31

  “A couple of years. I paid my dues in Manhattan. I was with a 32

  gallery on Fifty-seventh for about five years. But I always planned 33

  to move out here when I could.”

  ort 34

  Howell touched Kate’s shoulder. “Let’s get started,” he said.

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  shot of an empty beach. The image seemed ordinary at first. But as 1

  Kate’s eyes focused on the scene, she sensed an opening, a sort of 2

  expansion. She thought of 3-D postcards, the kind that offer up 3

  holographic images when you stare at them long enough. Only 4

  here, it wasn’t so much a visual shift as something that happened 5

  at a physical level. As if the picture was taking root inside her.

  6

  Kate turned to Howell. “You’re really good,” she said.

  7

  “Don’t sound so surprised.”

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  Kate blushed. “It’s not that. I just . . .” She let her voice trail off 9

  as she turned to the next framed image. A rocky coastline and an 10

  angry sea. Kate furrowed her brow. Hadn’t she seen this somewhere 11

  before?

  12

  “That picture, where was it taken?”

  13

  “Maine. Up around Penobscot Bay.”

  14

  She wasn’t sure why it looked familiar. After a puzzled moment, 15

  she moved on.

  16

  All in all, there were several dozen prints, some black and white, 17

  some color, all showing ocean scenes. While the settings were dif-18

  ferent, Kate could clearly see they were the work of a single artist.

  19

  In each picture, the elements were assembled against a backdrop of 20

  sky. There was a bleakness to the scenes, but a bleakness that 21

  hinted at secret riches. Something to be revealed. You stood before 22

  the pictures waiting.

  23

  “Thanks so much for inviting me,” Kate said, as they stepped 24

  from the gallery back onto Main Street. It was still early, a little be-25

  fore three, but daylight was fading fast. The air had grown windy 26

  and colder. The town seemed to be folding in on itself, hunkering 27

  down for night.

  28

  “What time’s your bus?” Howell asked. Kate could see the icy 29

  haze of his breath, rising in the air like frozen smoke.

  30

  “Around five,” Kate said. “But I’m fine. I’ll get a cup of coffee 31

  and read.”

  32

  Howell frowned. “Listen, there’s no point in you hanging 33

  around by yourself. I live right down the street. How about I make 34 sh

  us some coffee and then run you back up here in time for your bus?”

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  Kate struggled to frame a reply. “Oh, thanks, anyway,” she de-2

  murred. “But I don’t want to cause you any trouble.”

  3

  “It’s no trouble,” he insisted. “I have to go out again anyway.”

  4

  Howell’s hands thrust deep in his parka pockets. Dark hair 5

  curled across his forehead. Heathcliff meets L. L. Bean. Kate felt 6

  her resolution waver. After all, this wasn’t New York City. And 7

  Howell was hardly a random stranger. Still, something held her 8

  back. For days she’d been nervous, on edge. The residue of Chuck 9

  Thorpe. Just the thought of his name made her mouth go dry. Her 10

  body seemed to shrink inward. Then from nowhere, she was hit by 11

  a blast of rage that overpowered every other thought. Who was 12

  Chuck Thorpe to dictate her actions, to force her to live in fear?

  13

  With sudden defiance, she raised her chin. “I’d love to stop by your 14

  house,” she said. “If you’re sure you really don’t mind.”

  15

  16

  17

  Sam Howell’s home turned out to be a restored fisherman’s cottage; 18

  at least that’s what it felt like to Kate. It was small and snug, with 19

  a row of windows facing the bay. The main room was simply and 20

  sparely furnished. A sofa. Two chairs. A handsome round table in 21

  some dark wood. The space had a settled aspect, as if everything 22

  had been there for years. After pointing Kate toward an armchair, 23

  Howell headed back down the hall.

  24

  “It must be beautiful here in the summer,” Kate said, raising her 25

  voice to be heard.

  26

  “It is,” he called back. “But fall and spring are best. Before the 27

  tourists descend.”

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  Kate could hear the hollow sound of water pouring into a kettle.

  29

  Her eyes took in the room. The walls, painted a soft terra-cotta, 30

  showed no signs of Sam Howell’s work. There were several paint-31

  ings, though. Kate’s eyes lingered on one of them, a faded folk-art 32

  depiction of a young girl holding an apple.

  33

  The sound of footsteps on the smooth wood floor, and then ort 34

  Howell was back with two mugs.

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  “I already added milk. I hope you don’t mind.”

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  “That’s just how I like it,” Kate said, accepting one of the mugs.

  1

  “No sugar, though.”

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  Howell raised his eyebrows. “In a good cup of coffee? Never.” He 3

  flopped into the armchair across from hers, his legs stretched out 4

  on a rug.

  5

  Sipping her coffee, Kate was struck by the quality of silence 6

  here. While her own apartment was fairly quiet, there was always 7

  some background noise. The muted bass of a ne
ighbor’s stereo. A 8

  distant car alarm. Footsteps in an upstairs apartment.

  9

  “You must sleep really well here.”

  10

  Howell smiled. “Yes, I suppose that I do.”

  11

  “Why no photographs on the wall?”

  12

  “Everyone asks me that. I’m not sure I have an answer. Maybe 13

  it’s just that I need a break. To look at photographs while I’m eat-14

  ing or having coffee . . . it would be like I was working all the 15

  time.”

  16

  “Which would make you like me,” Kate said wryly.

  17

  “Long hours?”

  18

  Kate nodded. “I mean, I’m not complaining. Law firms get a bad 19

  rap, but I actually like what I do. It’s just that, sometimes . . .” She 20

  ended the sentence with a shake of her head. “I’m not sure what 21

  I’m trying to say.”

  22

  Howell watched her across the rim of his mug. “It must be stress-23

  ful working in a place where someone was recently killed.”

  24

  I don’t want to talk about that. “So how long have you lived in Sag 25

  Harbor?”

  26

  “Close to ten years.” If Howell noticed the change of subject, he 27

  didn’t let it show.

  28

  “That must have been a big adjustment, moving out here from 29

  Manhattan. Why did you make the leap?”

  30

  Howell didn’t respond right away. His eyes, more green than 31

  gray now, seemed to be searching her face.

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  “Kate, I haven’t been entirely honest with you.”

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  She returned his gaze, the words not quite sinking in. “What do 34 sh

  you mean?”

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  “I didn’t just bump into you by chance. I followed you the other 2

  day.”

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  Kate put down her mug hard. Hot coffee splashed on her knees.

  4

  The silence that had seemed so soothing was all too sinister now.

  5

  For an interminable second or two, Kate didn’t move. Then, heart 6

  racing, she sprang to her feet.

  7

  “Kate, please. I can explain.” He held out his hands, entreating.

  8

  As she moved toward the door, Howell blocked her escape. Kate 9

  stood there facing him, her breath emerging in short bursts.

  10

  “Look, I just want to leave now. Will you just let me leave?” She 11

  could hear the trembling in her voice.

  12

  Howell reached out to grasp her shoulders. Even through her 13

  sweater, she could feel the strength of his hands. “I’m not sure what 14

  you’re thinking, but you’ve got it wrong. I’m not —”

  15

  But Kate barely heard the words. She wasn’t sure she could 16

  make it. Still, she was going to try. With a surge of energy, she 17

  whirled around, yanking herself from Howell’s grip. He stumbled 18

  back against the wall. She could hear him struggling to regain his 19

  balance as she raced toward the front door. Grabbing the knob, she 20

  braced for an attack, but miraculously nothing happened. And 21

  then she was free, in the open air, running as fast as she could.

  22

  23

  24

  Back in town, Main Street sparkled in the early dusk. Kate stood 25

  on the sidewalk, panting, trying to sort out what went wrong.

  26

  Everything had happened so fast. One moment, she was sitting in 27

  a warm, bright house, engaged in relaxed conversation. The next, 28

  she was fleeing down a windblown street, running in fear for her life.

  29

  Now that she was standing still, Kate realized she’d forgotten 30

  her coat. Her skin, damp from exertion, felt clammy and icy cold.

  31

  She needed to find some shelter. Luckily, she had grabbed her 32

  leather backpack, which she’d carried in lieu of a purse. After some 33

  searching, she found a coffee shop open for business. She walked ort 34

  inside, ordered a cup of hot chocolate, and took a seat at a high reg 35

  round table.

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  Waiting for her drink to cool, Kate tried to make sense of what 1

  had happened. Howell had said that he’d been following her, that’s 2

  what had set her off. She’d been right to get out when she did. It 3

  had been the only smart thing to do. Run first, think later. Still, re-4

  viewing the day, she wasn’t sure she’d been in any danger. She 5

  went back over Howell’s behavior, from the time she’d arrived that 6

  morning. They’d been seen together in public, first at the restau-7

  rant and then at the gallery. Howell had introduced her to Virginia 8

  Cavanaugh. In the end, he’d let her go. These facts didn’t jibe with 9

  a picture of someone who’d meant to hurt her.

  10

  But if Howell hadn’t meant to hurt her, what had he wanted from 11

  her? Why had he bothered to track her down, to invite her out to 12

  Sag Harbor? It could just be that he found her attractive, but that 13

  didn’t make much sense. Howell was a handsome, successful man.

  14

  There were millions of women in New York. As fear continued to 15

  ebb, curiosity settled in. But the more Kate thought about all that 16

  had gone on, the more baffled she became. Why had Howell wanted 17

  to talk to her? What had he wanted to say? Kate’s eyes drifted to a 18

  phone on the counter. Should she give him a chance to explain?

  19

  Kate was still pondering this option when Howell walked 20

  through the door. Their eyes locked. For several seconds, neither 21

  spoke. Then Howell took a couple of tentative steps. Kate saw he 22

  carried her coat.

  23

  “I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” Howell said, still keep-24

  ing a careful distance. “Here. You forgot something.”

  25

  “Thanks.” Taking the coat from his extended hand, Kate felt a 26

  little absurd. Howell looked so calm, so normal. Instead of demand-27

  ing an explanation, she found herself offering one. “I’m sorry for 28

  running out like that. But when you said you’d been following me, 29

  it really freaked me out.”

  30

  Howell put out a hand to stop her. “It’s my fault,” he said. “I 31

  shouldn’t have started like that. I don’t blame you for being afraid.”

  32

  He was still standing several feet away. After a moment of hesi-33

  tation, Kate gestured at an empty stool. “You can sit down if you 34 sh

  want,” she said.

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  “Thanks.” He slid onto the seat, still watching her face. “Listen, 2

  I have to explain. It’s important. It . . . it has something to do with 3

&n
bsp; Madeleine’s death.”

  4

  Kate stared at him, confused. “Madeleine Waters?”

  5

  Howell bit his lip. “I should have told you right off. Madeleine 6

  was my wife. My ex-wife, I should say.”

  7

  “Your ex-wife?” It was all Kate could do to repeat the words.

  8

  They simply wouldn’t sink in.

  9

  Now Howell was racing ahead, the words pouring out in a rush.

  10

  “I saw you at Madeleine’s funeral. I asked who you were. I knew 11

  that I needed to meet you.”

  12

  “Madeleine was your ex-wife? ” She’d never even heard that Mad-13

  eleine had been married. Could Howell’s words possibly be true?

  14

  Then it came back, the photograph in Madeleine’s office. The 15

  crashing waves against the rocks. Of course. No wonder Howell’s 16

  work had seemed familiar.

  17

  “Look,” Howell said, “maybe I should start at the beginning.”

  18

  Kate met his eyes and nodded.

  19

  Sitting there on his stool, Howell seemed tired but determined.

  20

  “Madeleine and I went to college together in Chicago. We got 21

  married right after graduation and moved to New York. Madeleine 22

  was at Columbia, in law school. I was doing photography, trying to 23

  start a career. Doing odd jobs to make money. Things were fine the 24

  first couple of years. Then, after her second year of law school, 25

  Madeleine took a summer job at Samson & Mills. She loved it 26

  from the start, said she’d really found her niche. That fall, she 27

  stayed on part-time. The hours were crazy, but I accepted that. I 28

  was pretty busy myself.

  29

  “The following spring she finished school. That’s when she told 30

  me she’d be moving out. I was completely astonished. I’d thought 31

  we were doing fine. I didn’t hassle her about her hours. Was even 32

  proud she was doing so well. Anyway, I demanded an explanation.

  33

  Demanded and later begged. But I never got much of an answer.

  ort 34

  Just vague words about growing apart. The next thing I knew, she reg 35

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  was gone. We spoke only a few times after that. The divorce went 1

  through a year later.

  2

  “Flash forward to last month. Out of nowhere, I get this letter. It 3

  came in the regular mail. Addressed by hand. I recognized her writ-4

  ing immediately. You can’t imagine how I felt, all the feelings that 5

 

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