The Adventures of Sir Launcelot Greaves

by T. Smollett

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  IN WHICH OUR HERO DESCENDS INTO THE MANSION OF THE DAMNED.

  The first step which Sir Launcelot took in the morning that succeeded hisarrival in London was to settle Mrs. Dolly Cowslip in lodgings at thehouse where John Clump had promised to visit her; as he did not doubt,that, though the visit was delayed, it would some time or other beperformed, and in that case he might obtain some intelligence of Aurelia.Mr. Thomas Clarke was permitted to take up his habitation in the samehouse, on his earnestly desiring he might be intrusted with the office ofconveying information and instruction between Dolly and our adventurer.The knight himself resolved to live retired, until he should receive sometidings relating to Miss Darnel that should influence his conduct; but heproposed to frequent places of public resort incognito, that he mighthave some chance of meeting by accident with the mistress of his heart.

  Taking it for granted, that the oddities of Crowe would help to amuse himin his hours of solitude and disappointment, he invited that original tobe his guest at a small house, which he determined to hire readyfurnished, in the neighbourhood of Golden Square. The captain thankedhim for his courtesy, and frankly embraced his offer, though he did notmuch approve of the knight's choice in point of situation. He said hewould recommend him to a special good upper deck hard by St. Catherine'sin Wapping, where he would be delighted with the prospect of the streetforwards, well frequented by passengers, carts, drays, and othercarriages; and having backwards an agreeable view of Alderman Parson'sgreat brewhouse, with two hundred hogs feeding almost under the window.As a further inducement, he mentioned the vicinity of the Tower guns,which would regale his hearing on days of salutation; nor did he forgetthe sweet sound of mooring and unmooring ships in the river, and thepleasing objects on the other side of the Thames, displayed in the oozydocks and cabbage-gardens of Rotherhithe. Sir Launcelot was notinsensible to the beauties of this landscape, but, his pursuit lyinganother way, he contented himself with a less enchanting situation, andCrowe accompanied him out of pure friendship.

  At night, Mr. Clarke arrived at our hero's house with tidings that wereby no means agreeable. He told him, that Clump had left a letter forDolly, informing her, that his master, Squire Darnel, was to set outearly in the morning for Yorkshire; but he could give no account of herlady, who had the day before been conveyed, he knew not whither, in ahackney-coach, attended by her uncle and an ill-looking fellow, who hadmuch the appearance of a bailiff or turnkey, so that he feared she was introuble.

  Sir Launcelot was deeply affected by this intimation. His apprehensionwas even roused by a suspicion that a man of Darnel's violent temper andunprincipled heart might have practised upon the life of his lovelyniece; but, upon recollection, he could not suppose that he had recourseto such infamous expedients, knowing as he did, that an account of herwould be demanded at his hands, and that it would be easily proved he hadconveyed her from the lodging in which she resided.

  His first fears now gave way to another suggestion, that Anthony, inorder to intimidate her into a compliance with his proposals, had trumpedup a spurious claim against her, and, by virtue of a writ, confined herin some prison or spunging-house. Possessed with this idea, he desiredMr. Clarke to search the sheriff's office in the morning, that he mightknow whether any such writ had been granted; and he himself resolved tomake a tour of the great prisons belonging to the metropolis, to inquire,if perchance she might not be confined under a borrowed name. Finally,he determined, if possible, to apprise her of his place of abode, by aparagraph in all the daily papers, signifying that Sir Launcelot Greaveshad arrived at his house near Golden Square.

  All these resolutions were punctually executed. No such writ had beentaken out in the sheriff's office; and therefore our hero set out on hisjail expedition, accompanied by Mr. Clarke, who had contracted someacquaintance with the commanding officers in these garrisons, in thecourse of his clerkship and practice as an attorney. The first day theyspent in prosecuting their inquiry through the Gate House, Fleet, andMarshalsea; the next day they allotted to the King's Bench, where theyunderstood there was a great variety of prisoners. There they proposedto make a minute scrutiny, by the help of Mr. Norton, the deputy-marshal,who was Mr. Clarke's intimate friend, and had nothing at all of thejailor, either in his appearance or in his disposition, which wasremarkably humane and benevolent towards all his fellow-creatures.

  The knight having bespoke dinner at a tavern in the Borough, was,together with Captain Crowe, conducted to the prison of the King's Bench,which is situated in St. George's Fields, about a mile from the end ofWestminster Bridge, and appears like a neat little regular town,consisting of one street, surrounded by a very high wall, including anopen piece of ground, which may be termed a garden, where the prisonerstake the air, and amuse themselves with a variety of diversions. Exceptthe entrance, where the turnkeys keep watch and ward, there is nothing inthe place that looks like a jail, or bears the least colour of restraint.The street is crowded with passengers. Tradesmen of all kinds hereexercise their different professions. Hawkers of all sorts are admittedto call and vend their wares as in any open street of London. Here arebutchers' stands, chandlers' shops, a surgery, a tap-house, wellfrequented, and a public kitchen, in which provisions are dressed for allthe prisoners gratis, at the expense of the publican. Here the voice ofmisery never complains; and, indeed, little else is to be heard but thesounds of mirth and jollity.

  At the farther end of the street, on the right hand, is a little pavedcourt, leading to a separate building, consisting of twelve largeapartments, called state rooms, well furnished and fitted up for thereception of the better sort of Crown prisoners; and, on the other sideof the street, facing a separate division of ground, called the commonside, is a range of rooms occupied by prisoners of the lowest order, whoshare the profits of a begging-box, and are maintained by this practice,and some established funds of charity. We ought also to observe, thatthe jail is provided with a neat chapel, in which a clergyman, inconsideration of a certain salary, performs divine service every Sunday.

  Our adventurer, having searched the books, and perused the description ofall the female prisoners who had been for some weeks admitted into thejail, obtained not the least intelligence of his concealed charmer, butresolved to alleviate his disappointment by the gratification of hiscuriosity.

  Under the auspices of Mr. Norton, he made a tour of the prison, and, inparticular, visited the kitchen, where he saw a number of spits loadedwith a variety of provision, consisting of butchers' meat, poultry, andgame. He could not help expressing his astonishment, with upliftedhands, and congratulating himself in secret upon his being a member ofthat community which had provided such a comfortable asylum for theunfortunate. His ejaculation was interrupted by a tumultuous noise inthe street; and Mr. Norton declaring he was sent for to the lodge,consigned our hero to the care of one Mr. Felton, a prisoner of a verydecent appearance, who paid his compliments with a good grace, andinvited the company to repose themselves in his apartment, which waslarge, commodious, and well furnished. When Sir Launcelot asked thecause of that uproar, he told him that it was the prelude to a boxingmatch between two of the prisoners, to be decided in the ground or gardenof the place.

  Captain Crowe, expressing an eager curiosity to see the battle, Mr.Felton assured him there would be no sport, as the combatants were bothreckoned dunghills; "but, in half an hour," said he, "there will be abattle of some consequence between two of the demagogues of the place,Dr. Crabclaw and Mr. Tapley, the first a physician and the other abrewer. You must know, gentlemen, that this microcosm, or republic innminiature, is like the great world, split into factions. Crabclaw is theleader of one party, and the other is headed by Tapley; both are men ofwarm and impetuous tempers, and their intrigues have embroiled the wholeplace, insomuch that it was dangerous to walk the street on account ofthe continual skirmishes of their partisans. At length, some of the moresedate inhabitants having met and deliberated upon some remedy for thesegr
owing disorders, proposed that the dispute should be at once decided bysingle combat between the two chiefs, who readily agreed to the proposal.The match was accordingly made for five guineas, and this very day andhour appointed for the trial, on which considerable sums of money aredepending. As for Mr. Norton, it is not proper that he should bepresent, or seem to countenance such violent proceedings, which, however,it is necessary to connive at, as convenient vents for the evaporation ofthose humours, which, being confined, might accumulate and break out withgreater fury in conspiracy and rebellion."

  The knight owned he could not conceive by what means such a number oflicentious people, amounting, with their dependants, to above fivehundred, were restrained within the bounds of any tolerable discipline,or prevented from making their escape, which they might at any timeaccomplish, either by stealth or open violence; as it could not besupposed that one or two turnkeys, continually employed in opening andshutting the door, could resist the efforts of a whole multitude.

  "Your wonder, good sir," said Mr. Felton, "will vanish, when you considerit is hardly possible that the multitude should co-operate in theexecution of such a scheme; and that the keeper perfectly wellunderstands the maxim divide et impera. Many prisoners are restrained bythe dictates of gratitude towards the deputy-marshal, whose friendshipand good offices they have experienced; some no doubt are actuated bymotives of discretion. One party is an effectual check upon the other;and I am firmly persuaded that there are not ten prisoners within theplace that would make their escape, if the doors were laid open. This isa step which no man would take, unless his fortune was altogetherdesperate; because it would oblige him to leave his country for life, andexpose him to the most imminent risk of being retaken and treated withthe utmost severity. The majority of the prisoners live in the mostlively hope of being released by the assistance of their friends, thecompassion of their creditors, or the favour of the legislature. Somewho are cut off from all these proposals are become naturalised to theplace, knowing they cannot subsist in any other situation. I myself amone of these. After having resigned all my effects for the benefit of mycreditors, I have been detained these nine years in prison, because oneperson refuses to sign my certificate. I have long outlived all myfriends from whom I could expect the least countenance or favour. I amgrown old in confinement, and lay my account with ending my days in jail,as the mercy of the legislature in favour of insolvent debtors is neverextended to uncertified bankrupts taken in execution. By dint ofindustry and the most rigid economy, I make shift to live independent inthis retreat. To this scene my faculty of subsisting, as well as mybody, is peculiarly confined. Had I an opportunity to escape, whereshould I go? All my views of fortune have been long blasted. I have nofriends nor connexions in the world. I must, therefore, starve in somesequestered corner, or be recaptivated and confined for ever to closeprison, deprived of the indulgences which I now enjoy."

  Here the conversation was broke off by another uproar, which was thesignal to battle between the doctor and his antagonist. The companyimmediately adjourned to the field, where the combatants were alreadyundressed, and the stakes deposited. The doctor seemed of the middle ageand middle stature, active and alert, with an atrabilarious aspect, and amixture of rage and disdain expressed in his countenance. The brewer waslarge, raw-boned, and round as a butt of beer, but very fat, unwieldy,short-winded, and phlegmatic. Our adventurer was not a little surprisedwhen he beheld, in the character of seconds, a male and female strippednaked from the waist upwards, the latter ranging on the side of thephysician; but the commencement of the battle prevented his demanding ofhis guide an explanation of this phenomenon. The doctor retiring somepaces backwards, threw himself into the attitude of a battering-ram, andrushed upon his antagonist with great impetuosity, foreseeing, that,should he have the good fortune to overturn him in the first assault, itwould not be an easy task to raise him up again, and put him in acapacity of offence. But the momentum of Crabclaw's head, and theconcomitant efforts of his knuckles, had no effect upon the ribs ofTapley, who stood firm as the Acroceraunian promontory; and steppingforward with his projected fist, something smaller and softer than asledge-hammer, struck the physician to the ground.

  In a trice, however, by the assistance of his female second, he was onhis legs again, and grappling with his antagonist, endeavoured to tiphim a fall, but instead of accomplishing his purpose, he received across-buttock, and the brewer throwing himself upon him as he fell, hadwell-nigh smothered him on the spot. The amazon flew to his assistance,and Tapley showing no inclination to get up, she smote him on the templetill he roared. The male second hastening to the relief of hisprincipal, made application to the eyes of the female, which wereimmediately surrounded with black circles; and she returned the salutewith a blow, which brought a double stream of blood from his nostrils,greeting him at the same time with the opprobrious appellation of a lousyson of a b---h. A combat more furious than the first would now haveensued, had not Felton interposed with an air of authority, and insistedon the man's leaving the field, an injunction which he forthwith obeyed,saying, "Well, damme, Felton, you're my friend and commander; I'll obeyyour order--but the b---h will be foul of me before we sleep."--ThenFelton advancing to his opponent, "Madam," said he, "I'm very sorry tosee a lady of your rank and qualifications expose yourself in this manner--for God's sake, behave with a little more decorum, if not for the sakeof your own family, at least for the credit of your sex in general."--"Hark ye, Felton," said she, "decorum is founded upon a delicacy ofsentiment and deportment, which cannot consist with the disgraces of ajail, and the miseries of indigence.--But I see the dispute is nowterminated, and the money is to be drank; if you'll dine with us youshall be welcome; if not, you may die in your sobriety, and be d--ned."

  By this time the doctor had given out, and allowed the brewer to be thebetter man; yet he would not honour the festival with his presence, butretired to his chamber, exceedingly mortified at his defeat. Our hero wasreconducted to Mr. Felton's apartment, where he sat some time withoutopening his mouth, so astonished he was at what he had seen and heard."I perceive, sir," said the prisoner, "you are surprised at the manner inwhich I accosted that unhappy woman; and perhaps you will be moresurprised when you hear that within these eighteen months she wasactually a person of fashion, and her opponent, who by the bye is herhusband, universally respected as a man of honour and a brave officer."--"I am, indeed," cried our hero, "overwhelmed with amazement and concern,as well as stimulated by an eager curiosity to know the fatal causeswhich have produced such a reverse of character and fortune. But I willrein my curiosity till the afternoon, if you will favour me with yourcompany at a tavern in the neighbourhood, where I have bespoke dinner, afavour which I hope Mr. Norton will have no objection to your granting,as he himself is to be of the party."--The prisoner thanked him for hiskind invitation, and they adjourned immediately to the place, taking upthe deputy-marshal in their passage through the lodge or entrance of theprison.