Heartfelt

by Lynn Crandall

  Chills ran up and down Conrad’s spine, just thinking about the menacing creature as Asia’s father.

  “No, he disappeared after he took my wife’s life,” Booker yelled. “He’s a murderer and a part of TNG’s work at the preserve. He can’t be your father, Asia.”

  “Well, he said his name is Marcus. I never met my father so I have no way of knowing if he’s telling the truth. I’ve always known since I was young that my mother was human, so I would have gotten the were-cat genes from my father.” She pointed to Conrad. “You told me that way back when I first came into my were-lynx form.”

  Conrad allowed a quiet snarl to rumble in his chest. “He threatened Asia. He is bad news. And we know nothing about him.”

  “I’ll find out. He can’t hide from me,” Kennedy promised.

  “Sterling and I can do a search on him, too,” Lacey volunteered.

  “I can check the police department’s booking databases.” Ben pursed his lips. “Between all our resources, we’ll find him.”

  Jackson agreed. “As you mentioned, Asia, I’m also very curious about the special team who showed up at the preserve. That is something we need to look into. Ben reported the illegal hunting out there and Sage has been taken in for questioning about his involvement in it. I mean, he came right out and announced that he was sponsoring the bill to fund the preserve. It’s going to take some pretty fancy footwork to come out of this without being charged with something.”

  “It’s not impossible,” Kennedy said. “Remember, Sage has connections through TNG.”

  Jackson nodded, then continued his thought. “You talk about the intensity and longevity of the process to stop TNG. I understand your frustration and I am fully aware that my father had a hand in the pain you’ve suffered. You’re my friends, I respect you, and I’m here to help for as long as it takes.”

  “I don’t know what will happen to the warrior men and were-lynxes created by TNG, but we may find some answers when we investigate the military’s involvement.” Michelle eyed Conrad and he nodded in acknowledgment. “As for the animals on the preserve, Kennedy and I have already contacted an international animal rights organization. They’ll work with us to make sure those animals are properly taken care of.”

  “Thank you, Jackson, and all of you.” Casey sat back in his chair, a somber look on his face. “I propose we give ourselves some time to rest and process what has happened. We have services to perform for Cindy and Shaun.” His voice faltered. “Let me know when you want to do the services.”

  He rose from the table and walked out the backdoor. Conrad stood and silently began clearing the dishes while Michelle went to Casey.

  Booker put his hand on Asia. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

  He hugged her and she hugged him back, while Conrad took it in. It made his heart squeeze to see Booker’s red-rimmed eyes, but his kindness toward Asia spoke well of him. In his deepest sorrow he had space in his heart to show he cared about her.

  “How would you feel about burying them both in a dual service?” Booker asked. His eyes drooped. He looked so tired and probably needed to get through the next step before he could begin his healing process.

  “I would like that. Maybe we all could gather out in the woods and bury them here, close to us,” Asia suggested.

  “That would be nice.”

  Conrad patted him on the back. “When do you want to do it?”

  “Tonight?” Asia lifted her brows in question at Booker.

  He ran his thumb over his chin, pondering. “Tonight would be fine.”

  “I’ll talk to Casey about the details if you’d like.” Conrad looked at Booker, then Asia and they both agreed before Booker ducked his head and walked to the room Shaun’s body lay in.

  • • •

  During the afternoon, the women’s bodies were dressed and their hair combed. Asia did so, mindful that this was the last thing she could do for her mother. She took her time, and while she made her look nice she talked with her mom. “You’re beautiful, Mom. Your hair is shiny and pretty.”

  After dark, the colony, joined by Jackson and Lacey and Sterling and Ben, followed Asia and Booker to a prepared spot in an opening inside the forest. Conrad carried Cindy’s body at the head of the group, walking beside Quinn, who carried Shaun’s body.

  They laid them on the grass and stood aside.

  “We gather here to say good bye to our loved ones. We share the unbearable sorrow of their loss. We loved them. We miss them already.” He motioned for Conrad and Quinn to place the bodies in the graves and shovel dirt over them.

  “As is natural for our kind, we bury them in dirt, nature’s resting place, among the things they’ve loved. The trees, the grasses, the sun and moon and stars above. Nature will take their bodies, but they will always be in our hearts.” He bent his neck and let his tears drop to the ground.

  The group remained standing around the graves until the bodies were completely covered and lying deep in the ground.

  The were-cats stepped away in the woods to remove their clothes and shimmer. They came back to stand around the graves with their human friends. Casey led a lament for Cindy and Shaun, sending a mourning yowl into the night. The others—Asia, Kennedy, Conrad, Quinn, Tizzy, Lara, Asher, and Booker—each joined in with their own voices.

  Time passed, but Asia was loath to end the service. It comforted her to hear her colony members voice their grief. Their presence swathed her and let her be sad. To let her and Booker sink into the deep sorrow of loss with no pressure to move on or put on a stiff upper lip.

  When it felt right, Asia shimmered back to her human form and others followed. They headed back to the house, all but Booker. He’d shimmered but now sat beside Shaun’s grave, silent and alone. It felt right to leave him alone with her.

  Inside, Conrad pulled Asia aside and placed a gentle kiss to one of her eyelids, then the other. “It’s a process, Asia. Don’t skip it.”

  “Thank you. I love you.” She nuzzled deep under his chin.

  “I love you right back.”

  Casey found them and walked up beside them. “You’re welcome to stay. You know there’s plenty of room for everyone. We need to be together now.”

  “Thank you, Casey. That would be nice.” Asia kissed him on the cheek, so grateful for their amazing leader.

  “You can take the main guest room, if you want. You’ll have privacy. And if you feel like being among the rest of us, just join us in the living room. We’ll whip up something for dinner around seven.”

  Inside the guest room, Conrad closed the bedroom door behind him and stared at Asia. “What are you doing?” she asked.

  “Looking at you. I’m never going to be passive about you.”

  “So every time I walk in a room you’re going to stare at me with googly eyes?” She flopped onto the bed and clasped her arms behind her head.

  He dropped beside her. “Would that be a problem?”

  She laughed, amazed that she could. “Changing the subject.”

  He raised his eyebrow. “Really? You’re uncomfortable with my adoration?”

  She fixed him with a glare. “There is something else we need to discuss.”

  “Now?”

  “Right now, you nut. What are we doing about your parents’ gala?”

  He sat up and glared back. “I don’t know. I’ve been rather busy with, you know, rescuing people, saving your behind, stuff like that.”

  “I want to go. It will be, you know, fun.” Asia knew Conrad had issues with his parents. But if she were going to be in his life as his girlfriend, they should be told. “I’ll be with you.”

  Conrad sighed and looked out the window. His back hunched, he was the picture of defeat. His parents did that to him, but she believed he could do better.

  “I guess we should talk about it. I don’t have much to say.” He turned his eyes on her, resigned.

  “It’s two days away. I have to buy a dress. Does your tux fit?”

&nb
sp; He tossed a pillow at her. “Of course it fits. Thanks.”

  “For what?”

  “For pointing out to me that I need to stand with you at my side in front of my parents. It’s who I am. Their son who loves a moggy very dearly.”

  “It should be interesting.”

  He lay back down and rolled her beneath his arm. He bent to kiss her, slowly moving close enough that she could feel his breath on her skin. Her heart was heavy, but his presence grounded her to the moment. Her mom was gone, but she lived in spirit in Asia’s heart. And Conrad’s love held her sorrow with her.

  Chapter Eighteen

  The newspaper’s bereavement policy allowed Asia four days off. She had plenty of unused vacation days, too, so she added them together to give herself two weeks off.

  Tonight, Friday night following her mother’s death, her vacation was just beginning.

  She showered and began dressing for Conrad’s family party. With Lacey’s help, she now was wearing a simple up hairdo. Lacey lifted the dress over her head and helped position it on her body. The dress, also something Lacey had helped pick out, sported a silver, sparkly, beaded bodice that clung to her nicely. Its deep V-neck revealed just a modest amount of cleavage, and a deeper V that ended at her waistline showed her back. The black skirt flowed in folds from her waist to the floor. A long slit down the skirt revealed her left leg when she walked.

  “Oohh, you look so sexy,” Lacey gushed.

  Asia applied a dramatic, crimson red lipstick while Lacey admired her. “Thanks for all your help. You’re the best.” Asia pretended to hug and kiss her.

  “No touching, remember,” Lacey admonished. “Save the makeup.”

  Conrad’s troubled relationship with his parents and their dislike of moggies was no secret to the members of the colony, Sterling and Lacey included. Asia wanted a hug from Lacey to boost her morale.

  “Listen, Asia. You look amazing. You’ll be the best dressed woman at the party. Conrad loves you as you are, and rightly so.” She tilted her head and smiled. “Be you and you’ll be just perfect. The snobs’ opinions don’t mean anything.”

  “Thanks for the pep talk. I needed it.”

  Conrad knocked on the door, then walked in. He didn’t announce himself. His scent announced him. “Is my date ready?”

  “Go,” Lacey whispered.

  Asia walked down the hall and into the living room.

  She saw Conrad’s eyes first. They went wide and a smile popped on his face.

  “Wow. I mean, just, wow!”

  Laughter bubbled inside her. “You look very suave, debonair, all the really outdated but fitting complimentary words.”

  He lifted her hand and twirled her around. “Again, wow. You look very lovely. I’m honored to escort you tonight.” He bent toward her and kissed softly.

  “Thank you. Now let me see your outfit. Twirl.”

  “I beg your pardon? I don’t wear outfits, I am wearing a tux. And I don’t twirl.” He laughed and turned around for her.

  “I’ll be with the handsomest man at the gala.” He wore the tux so well, his chest broad and his shoulders strong. Her heartbeat picked up its pace, appreciatively.

  They said goodbye to Lacey and walked out Asia’s front door. At the car he held the door for her and she slid in. Everything felt magical. She wished her mom could see her now.

  • • •

  As they drove up into the Pike estate, Asia was taken aback by the exterior décor. Tiny white lights glittered everywhere. Garlands of peonies in all colors draped the stone fences, the entry, and the walkway around the house.

  “Now, in case you were wondering, my mother isn’t ostentatious, not at all.” Bitterness dripped from his words.

  “Oh, I can see she’s very austere. Prefers simplicity.”

  Conrad parked in the family parking area. “Hold it. I’m on my best behavior tonight. Enjoy it while it lasts.” He walked around to the passenger side of his Rover and helped her out.

  “Thank you, sir.” His eyes twinkled at her remark.

  “You can mock all you like. I won’t break.”

  They walked into the entry where the butler manned the door. “Douglas, so nice to see you.” Conrad wrapped an arm around the man’s shoulder. “This is Asia Blue.”

  “Lovely to meet you, my dear.” He bowed graciously, bringing a strained smile to Asia’s face. She tried for lovely, but it just didn’t happen.

  “Thank you, Douglas. Nice to meet you.”

  “Yes, miss, and sir.” Douglas winked. “Now do behave. If you anger her, I’ll pay for it.”

  Conrad leaned closer to Asia. “And by her, he means my mother.”

  “Please enjoy the party.” He gestured to the ballroom, where others were standing and munching on appetizers and sipping wine.

  “Are you going to introduce me to all those people?”

  “Of course I am. It’s my duty to show off my beautiful date.”

  “Oh, let’s not. The music is elegant. Let’s dance.”

  “Conrad, Conrad. Wait a sec, dear.”

  He muttered under his breath. “Oops, I should have spoken to my parents and now we’re caught.”

  His mother kissed his cheek, glaring sideways at Asia.

  “You remember Asia Blue, don’t you, Mother?”

  “Of course I do. Welcome.” Her words cut short and she could only muster a tight smile, but it was a smile.

  “Thank you. Your home is lovely, Mrs. Pike.” Asia focused on not allowing any thoughts from the roomful of strangers to penetrate her mind. So far, it was working.

  “Rebecca is dying to meet you, son.” She turned brightly to Asia. “I’m sure you don’t mind if I tear him away for a few minutes.”

  “Mother, I won’t be rude to the woman, but I told you I’m not interested in getting to know her. I’m staying here and you can bring her to me or not.”

  His mother’s sulk was unmistakable. She was angry and disappointed. Asia imagined Amanda Pike usually got her way.

  “Very well. Stay right here,” she instructed.

  Seconds later a shapely young woman with ethereal long blond hair wearing a delicate lavender full-length dress with pink and white pearls on the skirt glided up to Conrad.

  “Conrad, this is Rebecca Boylan. Rebecca, this is my son Conrad. Oh, and his little friend Asia Blue.” His mother gushed about the woman’s family heritage and status.

  Asia stood stoic beside Conrad, feeling as though she would just as soon fade into the wall rather than stand near this elegant beauty. She’d been introduced to Rebecca like she was twelve and wearing braids and braces.

  But then Conrad’s arm circled her waist while discussing the weather in England this time of year. He glanced down at her and the look of love glimmering in his honey brown eyes reminded her of her stature. She was a were-lynx in love with and loved back by a wonderful were-lynx and her best friend. The rest of it was all huff and puff.

  “Well, if you’ll excuse us, Rebecca, Asia and I were just preparing to join in the dance.”

  “Enjoy your evening, Rebecca.” Asia smiled, then turned to Conrad. “Like I said, let’s dance.”

  She walked at his side into the middle of the nearly empty dance floor. The chamber orchestra played a slow, sweet Viennese waltz. Her eyes were only for him.

  “Have I told you today I love you?”

  She smiled. “No, I don’t believe you have. Of course, you were working all day. And I was busy.”

  “I love you.”

  He pulled her closer and nuzzled under her ear. His sultry eyes made her almost dizzy. “I feel like Cinderella.”

  “Oh, you’re much more than a Cinderella. Didn’t you know I love you for your brain, your wit, your spunk? Your beauty, of course, comes from inside you.” He dragged his gaze slowly down her body and up again. “But you are stunning.”

  Suddenly she was aware of many eyes on them. “We’re being watched,” she whispered.

  “Then let’s give
them something to watch. Remember when you made me take tango lessons with you? Let’s put them to use.” He trotted up to the orchestra leader and whispered in his ear.

  “Here we go.” He smiled warmly at Asia and pulled her very close and set a frame, their backs very straight, their heads erect, their expressions dominating. With her right hand on his shoulder, his hand on her back, and their other hands lightly touching held high, they began the dance of two people moving in relationship with each other, in and out of dominance and submission.

  To the sound of the strings, Asia moved with Conrad in a box step, her feet mirroring his as he stepped forward, sideways, then backward. As they glided to the ancient moves of the tango, Asia’s heart thudded in her chest, exhilaration flaming her senses.

  Conrad slowly leaned her backward, and paused. Then pulled her abruptly up close, and instantly released her, sending her away, but pulling her quickly back into the frame. His gaze, burning and excited, held hers and she shot him a sultry look. Quick steps made her insides laugh, then cheek to cheek, their bodies so close, they slid slowly across the floor, sensuality oozing between them.

  Intensity between them built as the dynamic of balance between partners shifted with each move. Asia let the fury and sweetness of the dance thrum through her. She felt so alive.

  Conrad twirled her away and back to him again, her back tight against his chest as she slid slowly to the floor and paused. With a quick jerk, Conrad pulled her up and swirled her to face him, just as they began pivoting in serial steps.

  His arms supporting her, Asia leaned backward to the floor, submitting to the dominio of love. He pulled her up and they faced each other, backs straight and stubborn. He lifted her off her feet and set her against his side, her legs curled behind her for a brief pose. He shifted her off and in the same motion let her down to face him up close, as she wrapped one leg around his body for a final pose.

  She brought her feet together on the floor, still mesmerized by the dance. They remained there, face to face and breath coming fast, for a stretch of eternity. Asia knew outside of this moment with Conrad stood a room full of people. But right now they stood as two people, alone, in relationship to each other.