Always on My Mind (The Dawson Brothers, #1)

by Jessica Mills

  "Oh, yeah. I completely forgot that I sort of kidnapped you last night."

  "No, I came willingly."

  "Yes, you did," I said, wagging my eyebrows playfully at her.

  Sarah gave a gasp of mock horror at my innuendo and caught my face in her hands to kiss me. It was a moment I never wanted to forget; kissing her in my truck as the sun came up right outside the windshield. All too soon, though, I heard the hum of a tractor in the near distance and had to get out of the field as quickly as possible before the farmer found us.

  *

  A few minutes later we pulled up in front of the hotel.

  "Do you want to just wait here and I'll go in and grab everything and follow you back?" she asked.

  "Let me help you. It’ll be faster." I squeezed her shoulder as my eyes moved across her. I could fall in love with her so easily.

  We crossed the lobby and raced up the stairs to her room, hoping we wouldn't encounter any of the staff on the way. Fortunately it seemed like she had been living out of her suitcase for the most part so it wasn't difficult getting everything gathered up and ready to go. As I had suggested, she traded her dress for her jeans, and then swept her hair up into a ponytail and did a quick reconstruction on her makeup so it didn't look quite like she’d just had sex in the middle of a cornfield, which she had. I stifled a groan at the remembrance of how good she’d felt beneath me.

  She just had to drop off her key at the front desk and we could be gone.

  As luck would have it, when the sun came up, so did Norm, and he seemed particularly gleeful to see Sarah approaching the desk until he noticed me. The smile on his face dropped and was quickly replaced by a glare when he noticed our hands intertwined between us.

  "I guess the night receptionist didn't review our policy on overnight guests with you," he said tersely.

  Sarah started to reply, but I took a step forward, taking the key out of her hand and holding it out to him. "We didn't sleep here last night, and she won't be staying here any other night, either. Thank you."

  I dropped the key into his extended palm and started to guide her around the desk toward the door to the parking lot.

  "I guess that's one way to get on top of your singing career. Start by getting on top of an agent,” he grumbled.

  I turned back to Norm. "Excuse me?"

  He glanced up at me with a fake-innocent smile that made me sick and I lunged at him, dropping Sarah's luggage to the floor. She screamed as she grabbed at my back. Norm ducked out of the way as I tried to dive over the desk at him and Sarah yanked me back toward her.

  "Stop that!" she shouted. "I don't need you to defend my honor, especially to him. He's just bent out of shape because he's never going to get his hands on me and you did. Your hands, your lips, and everything else.” She pulled me out of the way and stepped up to the desk. "Yes, Norm, you are absolutely correct. He did get on top of me and I was very happy to let him. He fucked me on his truck, I'm hoping he's going to fuck me at some point later today, and then I'm bringing him back to Tennessee with me to start his career. I fully intend on him fucking me there, too, multiple times over and over. Please enjoy that image next time you are sitting alone at Kinsey's."

  Sarah followed me home, her compact car taking a nice beating on the dusty roads. I watched her in the rear view, thinking of how assertive she’d been. Though I usually regarded her as having the temper of a scrappy kitten, she’d shown me her claws. And I was thankful they weren’t pointed in my direction. As we pulled up to the house and parked, I motioned her over to my truck before anyone else showed up to witness our walk of shame. She jumped in and I drove us out to the barn at the back of the ranch. I couldn’t wait to get my hands and mouth on her again.

  I parked behind the barn and led her inside.

  She gasped as I shoved her up against the wall, but I met the sound with a crushing kiss, plunging my tongue into her mouth. My hands tore at the fastenings at the front of her pants and as soon as I loosened them, I dropped to my knees so that I could pull them off of her. I shoved her thighs apart and dove in, flicking my tongue across her clit until I could feel her shaking in my hands.

  Standing up, I worked at my own belt, and brought my mouth to hers again, biting at her bottom lip.

  "That was so damn sexy," I growled before pulling my shirt over my head and tossing it onto a bale of hay behind me. I pulled a condom from my back pocket and dropped my jeans before reaching for her.

  "What I said to Norm?" she asked breathlessly, her pretty cheeks pink. She moved from the wall and reached out, stealing the rubber from me. There was nothing hotter than listening to the sound of her breath hitching as she rolled the tight little bastard over my cock.

  "Uh huh," I said, sitting down on my shirt and yanking her forward into my lap. "Now why don't you show me how I taught you to ride a horse?"

  Sarah crawled onto my lap and lifted her hips as I slammed into her, pulling her down hard. I held her in place with one hand pressed to her lower back and the other gripping her ponytail tightly. She was beyond fine. Everything I wanted in a woman and then some.

  She moaned and started rolling her hips, leaning back slightly to brace herself on my legs. I met her hips with mine and within seconds she crashed around me. She gave a gasping cry and collapsed forward into my arms. I impaled her one last time and buried my face in the curve of her neck to muffle my scream as I came even harder than the night before.

  We stayed in that position, panting and nuzzling each other for a few minutes, until our bodies cooled. We relaxed enough to unfurl and reluctantly dress again.

  "I should probably let you work," she said, looping her arms around my neck and kissing me softly.

  "I'd rather spend the day doing this," I told her, cupping her ass with both hands and pulling her close.

  She giggled and I felt a sense of privilege knowing that I was probably one of the very few people who she relaxed with enough to giggle like that in front of them. "But who would take care of the cows?"

  I gave a dramatic sigh and squeezed her. "All right. I give up. Go up to the house and tell my mom I said you could take a nap in my room. She'll fuss, but just start heading up the stairs as soon as you get that out of your mouth. She's not fast enough to catch you. Mine is the room all the way at the end on the left. There's a bathroom attached if you want to take a shower."

  She sighed. "That sounds wonderful."

  "Make it more wonderful and think about me while you're in there," I murmured against her ear and she turned to bite my neck playfully.

  I watched her walk out of the barn, admiring the little bit of extra swish she seemed to have in her hips. As tired as I was after a night of not sleeping, I knew that thoughts of her would power me through the day.

  *

  I was just about to head up to the house for dinner that evening when I saw my brother Ted walking toward me. His face was dark and his posture looked uncomfortable.

  "What's up?" I asked.

  "You need to get up to the house," he told me. "Mom has Ella up there."

  "Oh, shit," I said and took off running toward the house.

  When I got there I saw my mother and my ex-fiancée standing on the front porch.

  "David..." Ella started as I approached, but I pushed past her toward my mother.

  "What is she doing here?" I demanded.

  "I invited her," she said.

  "Why?"

  "I just wanted to remind you of the type of nice, good girls you have available to you right here."

  "She is not a nice, good girl, Mom," I said, pointing back at Ella. "She's a whore who slept with every guy who walked within a twenty-foot radius of her, including, I might add, Ted."

  Mom gasped and covered her mouth with her hand. "I'm so sorry, honey, I just didn't want to see you running off to Tennessee without thinking it all the way through."

  “That’s not true,” Ella tried to defend herself, but we ignored the bitch.

  "Oh, god. Where'
s Sarah?" I barked angrily, never having allowed my voice to be so sharp with my mother.

  She hesitated, not wanting to answer me.

  "Where is she?" I shouted.

  “I don’t know. She stormed out and drove off.” She brushed her fingers by her lips.

  "I can't believe you. I can't believe you. How could you do this to me?" Devastation rushed through me.

  "I'm worried about you, Davey. You're getting so wrapped up in this idea of having an agent and starting some career that you are forgetting about your family."

  "You don't know anything about family, Mom."

  "How could you say that?"

  "In all the time I've been singing up at Kinsey's, how many times have you come up to listen to me?" My mother shifted uncomfortably. "Exactly. None. You, Dad, all of my brothers. None of you have come to listen to me sing even once, so don't lecture me about family."

  I turned on my heel and ran to my truck. Sarah might have gone back to the Dew Drop Inn. It was a long shot considering she’d told Norm off, but I had to check. Besides, there wasn’t another place to stay in town. I pulled in the parking lot but didn’t see her car. My gut tied up in knots as the lump in my throat threatened to choke me. She was gone...

  Norm stepped out of the lobby and I noticed he had the beginnings of a black eye. I slowed my truck and lowered the window. “If you’re looking for that crazy bitch, I saw her tear ass past about twenty minutes ago.” I wanted to jump out of the car and wail on his ass again, but I had to find her. I headed out on the main road in hopes that I could catch her, but it was no use. I made it to the edge of town and turned around to head back home.

  Up in my room I found a bag with her makeup and her toothbrush, nothing a woman would want to leave behind, but not anything that couldn’t be replaced at a drugstore. She’d come up and showered after all, just like I suggested. Misery set deep as I pictured her there doing the other things I’d suggested. That must have been when my mom called Ella. I looked around my room for the rest of her luggage, but she must have taken it. I had to accept that she was gone, and thanks to my mom and Ella, she wasn’t coming back.

  *

  Later that night, once I’d cleaned up from the long day of misery and work, I walked into Kinsey's and dropped down on my usual barstool, burying my head in my hands. Lucy had a beer in front of me before I even looked at her.

  “I'm sorry, David," she said quietly.

  News in this town travels fast and I was sure by now everybody in Kinsey's knew that Sarah was gone, and not only that – but why she’d left. I downed the beer as fast as I could and gestured for Lucy to bring me another one.

  I had almost forgotten that I was supposed to sing that night, and considered cancelling, but part of me hoped she’d show up to see me sing again. I sat on that barstool listening for the bells above the door, only to be disappointed when she never showed up. When Sam introduced me, I dragged myself up to the microphone, and then glanced back at the band. I pointed out one of the newer songs from our set list and started singing. I could barely bring myself to finish the song, and when I got the last word out, I immediately told everybody in the bar that the rest of the music for the night was going to be instrumental.

  I stepped down off the stage as the air left my lungs. It was time to grow up and stop living a pipe dream. I was a ranch hand, just like my daddy and his daddy before him. Sarah was a nice break, but she deserved far more than I could give or had to offer.

  Chapter 8

  Sarah

  I was halfway to Nashville when I considered turning around. But what would I do? Go back and fight for a man who was going to marry someone else? I felt so used. I was a fool to think that he would be different. After what happened in Texas I should have been more careful, considering my emotions are what stranded me in Oklahoma, far off my beaten path, to begin with. I’d have to remind myself in the future not to drive to blow off steam. A cold gallon of ice-cream, a bottle of wine, and a night of rom-com could do the trick.

  I couldn’t get his mother’s words out of my mind. “Have you met Davey’s fiancée?” I smiled a moment like a fool not realizing what she’d said. And I was sure I’d looked like a proper fool when the realization set in. Ella had stood there with a smug smirk on her perfect face. She was a golden beauty; blond hair, blue eyes and a complexion that could only be described as milk and honey. I was a frazzled lunatic next to her; the crazy agent who’d blown into town on a whim and had thrown myself at a mother’s precious boy. And I had. I’d given in too quickly and now I was paying the price with a broken heart. Silly, foolish girl.

  Before I knew it the last leg of my trip was over and I found myself home. I’d missed my apartment, its warmth, sanctuary. I walked in with my luggage and as I dropped it, I fell to my knees and wept. I heard the words of his mother playing over and over in my mind and had never felt so ashamed.

  “My boy might be easily distracted but make no mistake he’s in love with Ella. She’s a part of our family and I will not have my family disrespected.” I had stood there looking like a fool with damp hair from my long hot shower. I’d done just as he’d suggested and let myself imagine us together.

  His mother was brutal as she continued. “You need to get your ass on the road back to where you came from and find some other singer and another home to wreck.”

  I had wasted no time, running upstairs and gathering my things. Ella followed me and hovered. “Just like a city girl coming down here with your wiles and talks of big dreams, trying to steal my man. We’ve made plans, we have dreams of our own of family and children and running this ranch.” I didn’t slow down. I wasn’t sure I had even grabbed everything, but it didn’t matter. I just wanted out of there. My temper was so hot I thought I’d burst into flames before I got to my car. They’d made me the villain, but David was the liar.

  I picked myself up off the floor and left my luggage where it lay as I headed to the kitchen for something to drink. The bottle of wine was a welcome sight on the top shelf of the fridge and I grabbed it and pulled the cork with my teeth, spitting it to the floor. I wouldn’t need that again. Housekeeping could wait. I’d finish this bottle and sleep, but first, I’d wash the hours of driving, and all the nastiness of Ella’s harsh glares, off of me.

  After using all the hot water, I came to the conclusion that no amount of washing would end the feeling I had blanketing me. I’d allowed myself to be used like some second-string whore, and maybe it was what I deserved. I’d set out to Texas with the intent of sleeping with my old boss, only to find that he was married and the client was a complete fraud. I’d so hoped that trip would change my life, instead, I’m right back here where I started, with a broken heart, no hot water, and a half a bottle of wine.

  I lay on my bed numb, not caring that my wet hair was soaking into my pillow. My life was a mess. My career was worse. Just months ago I’d changed firms after losing a big client to my competition, and I was lucky to find another that would give me a chance. I’d been trying to pick up the pieces and prove myself since, but it seems I failed at every turn. Why would I think David would be so different? Because he had the talent. There was no doubt about that. If I’d only kept things professional, I could be setting up studio time instead of feeling sorry for myself. I gave my misery to the sandman and woke up the next morning not feeling any better.

  *

  My phone woke me the next morning and I ran from my bed to the living room hoping to catch it in time. My handbag was buried under the suitcase where I’d dropped everything the night before and I dug inside and found my phone just as it stopped ringing. Three missed calls and all from Jennifer, my best friend, who I forgot to call and let know I’d made it back into town alive. A small part of me hoped it was David, but then I realized I had never given the sexy cowboy my number. He’s engaged. My heart sank all over again and I wanted to crawl back in bed and forget the world, but I knew I better call Jenn instead.

  “Sarah, what the hell?�
� she said.

  “I’m sorry. I got home late and forgot to call.” I braced myself for her tongue lashing. She and I had been so close for years and she’d been worried since I’d left Texas and messaged that I was lost in Oklahoma. I’d left her a frantic message when I left David’s house.

  “I was worried sick, I called all night and almost drove over.” A sigh of relief sounded through the phone and in the silence that followed I could imagine her trying to gather her thoughts. “Have you eaten yet?”

  My stomach growled in response before I could speak. “No, I don’t feel like eating, but I guess I’m hungry.”

  “Well, I want to know everything and I have a feeling it’s going to take a while.” Jennifer had always wanted to know every detail when an incident occurred and wouldn’t say her peace until she had all the facts. “Meet you at Dixie’s across town?”

  “Yeah, I’ll be there in half an hour.” I was torn between wanting to forget every second of Oklahoma and wanting to tell her all about it, but as I went to find my toiletry bag, I realized that I didn’t have any makeup or a toothbrush for that matter. I hadn’t cared the night before. I’d let the wine cleanse my palate, but it would take more than a breath mint to make it better.

  I dug through my cabinets until I found a new packaged toothbrush and used baking soda for my paste. It would work in a pinch until I could get to the drugstore on the corner and replace everything I’d left in David’s bathroom.

  Once I looked human, I headed out toward Dixie’s Café. The place had once been a small mom and pop diner, but it had grown into a thirty-year business for the owners who still worked their shifts cooking and waiting tables. I entered the quaint, but charming diner with its teal blue floors and red and white booths and spotted Jenn waiting at the bar. She smiled and grabbed her coffee and motioned me to a corner booth in back. “I figured you and I could use a little privacy for this heart to heart.” Concern plagued her expression as we slid into our seats across from one another.