Always on My Mind (The Dawson Brothers, #1)

by Jessica Mills

  “My brother is a good man; he’s got big dreams. I’m just not sure how our parents feel about it. Our dad is kind of tough. David’s been through a lot.” He gulped down more water and placed the glass in the sink. “You love him?” His eyes met mine.

  I didn’t know how to answer that. I wanted to love him. I’d given him a huge piece of my heart and then we’d had that awful misunderstanding. For a moment I couldn’t find my words, but then I finally responded, “I think I could...in time. It’s all so new.”

  “Look, it’s not my place to say, but I’m going to say it anyway, be careful with his heart. It’s been dragged through hell a time or two, and the last time, well, it left a mark. I thought we’d lost him.” He pushed off the counter and headed for the door.

  “Lost him?” I turned from the stove and leaned against the island to close the distance between us.

  “Yeah, after Ella, he shut down completely. It was a lot of drama and he couldn’t deal. They were a month out from their wedding. It’s kind of a sore spot.”

  “I promise, I’m not here to hurt him. I want to help. I care a lot about him.”

  He glanced over my shoulder toward the stove and then gave me a nod. “I can see that.” He disappeared around the corner and I listened to his footsteps as he climbed the stairs.

  *

  Twenty minutes later the back door opened. I remembered Ted from before and having met Luke, I deduced that the other dark-haired brother had to be Mason. David had a gorgeous family, and I peeked out the kitchen door as they gathered in the living room with David finally entering behind his brothers.

  Ted leaned over and pulled up his pants leg to kick off his boots. “What a day.”

  Mason did the same, kicking off his boots before peeling his shirt and wiping his face with it. “Is that my imagination or is Mama home?”

  I stepped into the wide doorway that separated the two rooms. “Dinner is almost ready.” My eyes met David’s and he stood there slack-jawed looking at me as if in awe. My face burned, but I felt good, especially when he hurried out of his mucky boots, crossed the room, and gave me a deep kiss, keeping me at arm’s length to not get me too dirty.

  “You made us dinner?” He whispered the words and I nodded, trying to keep the ridiculous smile off my face. He walked past me to the stove and smelled the aroma in the air.

  I glanced around when Ted and Mason entered the kitchen and though Mason smiled, Ted gave me a hard glare.

  David’s voice pulled my attention back to him. “Let me go shower and I’ll be down to help you set the table.” He shooed his brothers along with him and once again I found myself alone in the kitchen.

  I gathered the dishes for the table setting and decided to go ahead and bring them to the dining room. On my way, the doorbell rang. Glancing around, I gave a shrug and hurried to answer it.

  I opened the door to a wide-eyed stare. The girl was simply gorgeous with long red hair and bright blue eyes and I could tell by their expression she was surprised to see me. She was dressed casually in jeans and a button-down and held a casserole dish.

  “Hi, I’m Lauralee Langston from next door.” Her chest heaved with an intake of breath and she seemed to force a smile. “Who are you?” Her sharp tone took me aback.

  I hesitated, concerned she might be there to see David. “I’m Sarah, I’m David’s friend.”

  She let out a long breath and smiled. “Oh, I see. Well, then here.” She passed me the casserole. “I thought with Mrs. Dawson falling ill, the boys might need something to eat. She glanced behind me and sniffed the air. “Smells like you’ve got that under control.” She glanced down at her feet.

  “This will be great. Would you like to stay for dinner? I’m just about to set the table.” The question seemed to make her nervous as she shifted from foot to foot and wrung her hands.

  “Is Ted home?” she asked with a shrug.

  “Yes, he’s just upstairs. I can get him.”

  She shook her head nervously and stepped back as if she were ready to run. “No, that’s fine. No need. I have to get back home.” She turned and hurried down the steps and walked across the field.

  “Who was that?” David’s voice sounded behind me and I turned to see him and Ted washed up and ready for dinner.

  “Your neighbor, Lauralee, she brought this.” I gestured to the dish as David glanced over his shoulder to his brother who looked like someone had just ripped his heart out and stomped on it.

  Ted breezed past me to the door and stuck his head out to see her. “Did she say anything?” His eyes were hard and I held my hands up and shook my head.

  David approached behind me and wrapped me in his arms. “Go after her, you’ll catch her before she hits the gate.”

  “I’m not chasing after her.” He continued to watch out the door.

  I glanced over my shoulder at David. “Are they a couple?”

  Ted threw me a hard glance. “Mind your own damned business.”

  David stepped around me and nudged me behind him. “Hey, watch it. She doesn’t know, so don’t talk to her like that.”

  I kept walking and left the two to work it out as I brought the casserole to the kitchen and picked up where I left off. I could hear David shouting at his brother. “Quit being a stubborn ass. You know you want that girl. Hell, everybody knows it but her.”

  Ted’s boomed louder as Mason and Luke came down the stairs. “That’s because she don’t want me. Now mind your own damned business. Shit.”

  The younger Dawson studs peeked in at me, both shaking their heads like they didn’t know what to think of me. I flashed a warm smile as David pushed past them.

  “Sorry about that. Lauralee is a sore subject.” He helped me set the table and followed me back into the kitchen to fetch the food.

  Once we had the table set, with the food steaming and ready to serve, he called his brothers and pulled out a chair for me. “This looks and smells amazing. Thank you.”

  “Don’t thank me until you taste it. It’s my grandmother’s recipe and I know every woman on earth makes dumplings different from the next.”

  Mason walked in and pulled out a chair first. “No one makes them like my mama. But I won’t look a gift horse in the mouth.” He gave me a warm smile and ladled the steaming entrée onto his dish.

  “I won’t be offended if you are partial. I haven’t quite gotten them like hers, but then, I only watched Gram make them, I never got to help.” I smiled as the others entered the room and without any ado, filled their plates and made quick work of filling their stomachs.

  They made a little small talk now and then, but the subject of Lauralee never resurfaced. Ted stayed quiet and I wondered if he was thinking about the beautiful redhead. I got up and brought out dessert and placed it in the middle of the table.

  Luke’s eyes widened. “Peach cobbler?” I nodded. “If you ever get sick of my brother, I’m available.” He reached across Mason to grab the pan and shoveled himself a nice serving, as the others laughed. All but Ted.

  Chapter 19

  David

  Sarah sure surprised me. I had no idea she’d cook a big dinner, but considering my day had overlapped into the evening, and I was growing sick of cold cuts, I was thankful she did. She cleared the table as my brothers went to the living room to watch sports. I stacked up our plates and followed her to the kitchen. “You sure better be careful.” I drew in my lips and shook my head.

  Sarah stacked the dishes in the sink and ran some water to rinse them. “What do you mean, be careful?” Her eyes were full of concern but softened when I smiled and pulled her into my arms and pinned her against the counter.

  “A sexy little city girl that cooks the way you do, well, I just might fall in love.” I took her mouth with mine, teasing my tongue across her lips and mingling it with hers.

  She pulled away. “Oh yeah? Right.” She rolled her pretty green eyes to the ceiling and giggled.

  “I’m serious, Sarah.” I ran my hand up
her arm and into her hair and then I caressed her cheek. She stared back at me wide-eyed and smiled.

  Before I could lean in and kiss her again, she pulled away, and then before I could figure out why, Luke entered the room.

  He carried more of the dishes from the table and stacked them on the counter. “You two should get out of here. I’ll clean up.”

  Mason came in with his arms full too and placed the near empty pot of dumplings on the stove. “I’ll help. That sure was some good cookin’. You should probably get off your feet a bit.” My younger brothers exchanged a glance and then busied themselves around us. I didn’t think they were going to take no for an answer.

  I shrugged. “Want to take a ride down to the creek?”

  She glanced at my brothers as they made busy and nodded. “Sure.” I tucked her close to my side and walked her to my truck. She stopped and then covered her face. “Are my panties still in the glovebox?”

  “Yeah, about that, my brother’s kind of found them.”

  Her eyes widened and she covered her mouth. “You didn’t tell them what we did on the hood, did you?”

  “A gentleman never tells, but I think they figured that out when they pulled your skivvies from my glovebox.” I chuckled as I opened the passenger door and she climbed inside.

  I slid into my truck and started the engine as she sat quiet. “What’s the matter?”

  “Nothing.” She stared out the window away from me.

  “There’s something you should know about us country boys, Sarah. We can smell bullshit a mile away.” I headed out toward the creek and kept my eyes forward as she stirred next to me.

  “You said you could fall in love with me.” The laughter in her voice didn’t help my confidence so I let out a long breath while she continued. “It’s not a terrible thing, but with everything that’s happened I didn’t expect that.”

  “I meant it, you know. I didn’t say it on a whim.” I glanced over to see her smiling at me with that same uncertainty in her eyes. I continued to the creek and when I pulled in and parked the truck, I sat waiting on her to talk.

  “So what now,” she adjusted herself to face me, “hot sex on the hood of your truck... or more?”

  Confused, I met her eyes and stayed silent.

  She covered her face and groaned. “I’m sorry.”

  Aggravation set my pulse racing. “No, I’m sorry, Sarah. I guess I made it weird. I was just trying to thank you for a wonderful dinner and let you know how impressed I was, but I guess talking about love this soon was stupid.”

  She hopped across the seat and took my hand. “No, it wasn’t. I just suck at commitments. They always blow up in my face and I’m always so scared when starting something new that... I don’t want it to be weird.”

  “What’s weird is that we had such a good time when you were here before and I thought you knew how I felt, I thought you came here for us and to try and make something more.” For a moment, I felt like a stranger, but then I realized the problem. “It’s too much too soon, right?”

  “I guess in some ways it is. I didn’t expect to fall so hard and so fast for you. I mean, we’re still getting to know one another, yet we know each other in such a personal way. I guess I just want you to fall in love with me for more than what we did on your hood before.” She faced forward and leaned her head on my shoulder.

  “And in the barn.” I put my arm around her and lay my cheek to her hair.

  She nudged me. “Yes, and in the barn. Did you mean it?” She held her hand up and turned to look at me. “I only ask because I see big things for us and I have hopes for both of our careers that I don’t want to damage by doing this. I have feelings for you too, and I want you in my life, but for more than just incredible sex.”

  My chest swelled with pride and I pulled her into my lap. “Incredible, huh?”

  “Yes. I’m tired of being alone, but honestly, I don’t want another failed relationship. We should have taken things slower. I realized that when I left here the last time.”

  “I thought you peeled out of here because of the drama, but it hurt thinking that you could go so easily. Now I understand, but man, that was a hard feeling.” I opened my door and took her hand. The sun was setting and all the night critters were singing the songs of their kind, and I wanted to welcome the stars with her down by the water on the sand. “Let’s go finish this conversation down on the bank. This is one of my favorite places.”

  “Just talking?” She raised a brow as if she didn’t believe me.

  “Yes, but I can’t promise I won’t kiss you.”

  “Kissing isn’t optional. I like kissing you.” She rose up on her toes and I leaned down to meet her lips with mine.

  We walked down to the bank as the last part of the sun slid down the horizon and the sky was lit red and orange above us. I sat in the sand and pulled her down beside me. I wanted to kiss her again, but in the spirit of getting to know her, I opted for a different approach. “So, tell me all about yourself. Something I don’t know.”

  She shrugged and then stared off to the sky that was starting to show the first sparkle of starlight. “Well, I grew up with a single mother and because my dad left when I was a baby, I never knew him. She went from one relationship to the other and because of that I spent most weekends with my grandmother, who taught me how to cook. I watched my mother go through tough times and we struggled because of her failed relationships. I guess that’s why I try to be self-sufficient. My career is important to me and I refuse to go without in life. That’s why as bad as I want you, I don’t want to lose hold of my dreams. I guess I’m selfish that I want both.” She searched my eyes as I stroked her back.

  “You’re not selfish, and I’d never ask you to jeopardize anything for me. And by the way, I did mean it.”

  “I hope you did. I feel the same way. It’s why I hesitated coming back.” She released a long breath and leaned back on her elbows to stare at the sky.

  “That was you hesitating?” I belted a laugh and she joined in. I loved her laughter. She had such a strong voice that her soft-toned laughter was a nice contrast. It was genuine, and made me want to make her laugh for the rest of her life.

  “So, have you reconsidered living your dreams? I mean, I am a talent agent and you’re a true talent, David. I think we’d make a great team.”

  “It’s not whether I want to, it’s when I should. It doesn’t feel right, not now. I want to see where we can take this, career and everything, but I just can’t abandon my family. Maybe when Mama is out of the hospital and things settle down, we can see where we’re at.”

  “So you’re not quitting? You shouldn’t you know. Even if you don’t play at Kinsey’s you shouldn’t lock your guitar away in the attic.”

  I tried hard to hold back my smile, but I couldn’t help it. “That reminds me, I’ve got a surprise for you.”

  She leaned in close and clutched my arm. “You should know that I hate surprises.” She met my eyes and the pouty set of her lips made me laugh.

  “You keep poking out that lip and I’m going to bite it.” I gnashed my teeth and grinned.

  “Tell me. Please.” She was so hot when she begged. Her lashes batted and she tugged my arm.

  “I don’t know; your begging is turning me on.” She pushed at me playfully and we shared a laugh.

  She shrugged and turned her attention back to the sky.

  I gave her a nudge. “Quitter. You’re giving up so soon?”

  She turned that pretty little nose of hers up to the stars. “Well, if all you’re gonna do is tease me—”

  “Fine, I’ll tell you. Are you ready?” My heart grew light as she clutched my arm again and leaned in. “I got my spot back at Kinsey’s. I decided not to quit, after all.”

  Her jaw slackened and then she lunged at me, throwing her arms around my neck. “That’s wonderful news. I was so upset you’d quit.”

  “Well, doing that demo made me realize how much I love music and it made me think
of you, which is weird, but in a good way.”

  “Weird?” She narrowed her eyes.

  I nodded. “Yeah, because it always made me think of my grandfather before, but now I can’t even see my guitar without seeing you.”

  She closed the space between us and whispered, “Kiss me.”

  I didn’t make her ask twice. I claimed her lips and cupped her face in my hands. She was so dainty and soft in my grip and I hardened as she relaxed against me. I cursed myself for the reaction, it wasn’t the time, but I couldn’t help how she made me feel. I wanted to explore every inch of her again and though I knew she wanted to take things a tad slower this time around, I was content with just her lips for now.

  We kissed until our mouths were raw and she relaxed against me as we stared up at the moon. The bright, waxing orb was nearly full and it illuminated the night with enough light that we had no trouble walking back to my truck.

  As I boosted her into the cab, she covered a big yawn. “I hope I don’t fall asleep on the way home.”

  “I’ll carry you up to my bed and tuck you in if you do. You had a big day, despite that long nap.” Remembering her drive made me feel so guilty. I hated to think of her on that road all alone, though that was how she’d gotten here in the first place.

  She stayed by my side and leaned on me while I started the truck and headed back toward home. “Think your brothers will still be there or do they go out?”

  “I don’t know. They might be out having a beer at Kinsey’s. We might have the house to ourselves.”

  “Do they have girlfriends?” She let out another contagious yawn and I fought the urge as I answered.

  “Mason goes out now and then, but he hasn’t ever had just one special lady. He’s like Ted when it comes to that, but Ted has the bad reputation out of the four of us.” I thought of how he’d done me over Ella and gritted my teeth.

  “What about Luke? You know, in case this doesn’t work out, he wants to date me.” She giggled, but I feigned insult and cut her a glare. Luke wouldn’t do me that way. He wasn’t like Ted.