Love Me Like You Do

by Sasha Clinton

  It was no longer plain lust that he felt when he looked at her. It was something warmer, deeper. He didn’t want something more with her.

  “The wine’s messing with your head.” He craned his neck.

  “No it isn’t. I know what I’m saying.”

  “What day is it?”

  “Saturday. The tenth.”

  She’d gotten that right. Still, he wasn’t convinced that she was ready. That he was ready. “You have a headache.”

  “I feel better now.” Her syllables fell out lazy and uncoordinated. “If you miss this chance, you might never get it again.”

  “Sleep.” Grant extricated himself from her grasp and laid a kiss on her head. “Good night, baby.”

  Then he did the unthinkable—he turned off the lights and left her alone.

  *

  Bella’s date with Mr. Hotshot Banker crashed and burned sooner than she’d anticipated.

  The guy was seriously an egomaniac. All he could talk about was himself. He yapped on about his brilliant career, his bonus last year, his Harvard MBA and the daily grind of his job. Repeatedly, she yawned, hoping it would shut him up, but he threw in more complicated words, until she was snoozing with her eyes open.

  “This year’s not been the strongest for the Stock Exchange.” He tapped on his receding hairline.

  She shook her head on autopilot. “Uh-huh.”

  And he was boring. Not hot, either. If she married him, she would be trapping herself with a self-absorbed bonehead whose entire vocabulary consisted of jargon and numbers.

  Plus, he was over forty and divorced. Now, she had nothing against divorcees, but he’d told her that he had a heavy child support burden and his old house now belonged to his wife. In her language, that translated to ‘I’m borderline broke and will remain so until my son gets through college.’

  Still, she sat through the date and heard him drone on about equity portfolios, market risk, and the like.

  “Isn’t the soup too salty?” she butted in politely, when she couldn’t take it anymore.

  He tasted the soup, then carried on like she’d never spoken. “If you were to invest in the fund, you could double your money in five years....”

  At some point, around the time she forked vinegary kale into her mouth, Bella forgot whether she was here to buy stocks or to find a husband. Through it all, she cursed herself for not having agreed to meet Kelly. An evening with Jamie would never have ended up like this.

  Jamie listened to her. He laughed at her. He made her laugh.

  “That’s great.” Doing her best not to fall asleep, Bella sprinkled pepper into her soup. “Do you go out on weekends?”

  “I don’t have the time.” He locked his arms over his chest, a gesture that her questions weren’t welcome.

  “I usually go out with my friends on weekends—”

  “Isn’t the beef overcooked?” He held up a chunk of beef that was stuck to his fork, cutting her sentence short. “This is not how it should be. My mother makes the perfect beef and broccoli stir fry. The trick is to stir-fry it.”

  “Oh.”

  Ugh. A mama’s boy.

  “Do you want to ask the manager—”

  “No need to make a scene.” He didn’t let her finish.

  Every time she interrupted, he became more impatient. By the end of the second course, she’d made up her mind to not stay for dessert. If she did, she might end up smearing cake on his face and becoming a living cliché.

  But the thought of the rest of the night alone at her studio wasn’t appealing, either. Spending Friday nights by herself made her feel twice as lonely.

  You could go to Grant Star’s house, her inner voice suggested.

  Too late for that now. She wasn’t dressed in the right clothes, and she didn’t own any party-appropriate clothes. Anyway, she wasn’t going to go, because that’d be like telling Jamie she was willing to hook up with him just for fun, which she wasn’t. Even if Mr. Financial-jargon had failed her, there were other men in the world.

  By the time the check came around, her ears were bleeding, and she wanted to disappear to a place where words like ‘financial’ and ‘return’ wouldn’t bother her.

  Tossing him the well-worn, “I don’t feel any chemistry between us,” dialogue, she waved him goodbye.

  Honestly, he seemed quite relieved, too.

  The jargon he’d smothered her with all night was ringing in her ears when she made a call.

  To Jamie.

  It was pure reflex. She didn’t consciously tap on his name. It just happened. And then she didn’t feel like hanging up.

  She could give him a chance. Who knew, he might end up committing and marrying her.

  Ha—how naïve was it to think that? Even if, by some miraculous stroke of luck, he wanted to make things long term, he couldn’t because he’d have to move to LA. And no fucking way was she moving to LA for a man again.

  But what if she didn’t expect anything from him? No ring, no commitment, no sacrifices. What if she just explored the connection they had and hoped it’d lead somewhere? What if?

  You’ll end up forty, alone, and depressed. Unsettling visions of her enviously looking at Ashley’s children and Kat and Alex’s vacation pictures floated by.

  She didn’t want to be that woman. There were women who were comfortable being alone, but she wasn’t one of them. Being with someone, being loved by someone had been the only thing she’d ever wanted in life.

  “Hey.” Jamie’s cocky tone rippled through her, sending every other thought flying. “Changed your mind?”

  “Maybe. You still at the party?” she hollered, because she wasn’t sure he could hear her over the deafening beat behind him otherwise.

  She’d taken three months off dating already. Might as well take the rest of the year off.

  “Yeah. But don’t come. Kelly already left.” The music in the background gradually grew softer as Jamie moved away.

  “That’s okay. It’s you I wanna meet. Can I come to your apartment right now?”

  “My apartment.” There was no missing the underlying question.

  Defensive, Bella said, “What’s the big deal? You’ve watched a movie at my place before.”

  I’ve slept over at yours before.

  “So we’re going to watch a movie?” There was clear derision in the way he asked it. Like he didn’t believe for a second that she’d want to watch a movie with him.

  And he was mostly right. There were a million possibilities racing in her mind, but all of them were more physically intensive than watching a movie. After weeks and weeks of longing for more sex with him, dreaming up scenarios, fingering herself while thinking of him, she couldn’t let her desperation wear down her willpower.

  “Why not? We’ll eat some snacks and watch a movie.”

  “Okay.” He drew out the ‘ay.’ “I’ll pick up something to eat on the way. Any preferences?”

  “Condoms. Banana flavored.”

  Oh fuck.

  I didn’t actually say that, did I?

  Wait...had she actually said that? She’d been thinking about it, but...

  “Can you repeat that? I thought I heard condoms,” he emptily echoed.

  She couldn’t see him, but she imagined the smirk on his face died then.

  She kept going, mostly because there was no way to backpedal out of this. She’d trapped herself.

  At least my bikini wax won’t go to waste.

  “Yeah. I said condoms. And if they don’t have banana flavored, get orange. But not chocolate.”

  Jamie’s silky laugh ran up her ears. “I swear; this is the most interesting conversation I’ve had with anyone over the phone. So tell me, what are you planning to do with all these condoms?”

  “Put them on your cock and suck you, what else?” Yeah, she was totally in over her head.

  She’d never been so crazy with a man before. She’d never told anyone her unfiltered, weird thoughts. But with Jamie, she could just d
o all these strange things. Because what did it matter? At the end of three months, he’d be gone.

  “Crap.” He coughed. “Do you know how sexy you sound right now? I can’t believe you were hiding this kinky side from me.”

  “I didn’t freak you out?” She wouldn’t get her hopes up too much.

  “Believe me, it takes a lot to freak me out.” He chuckled softly. “So I’m seeing you in a bit?”

  “Count on it.”

  Chapter 11

  This time, they at least made it to the bedroom.

  “I’m so, so gonna regret this,” she said, sandwiched between his body and the mattress as Jamie fitted his mouth against hers.

  In a matter of moments, they were ripping hot, hungry kisses from each other’s lips. Throwing one thigh over his legs, she straddled him, unbuttoning his shirt and raining her hands down his tight muscles.

  “Bella...” he grunted her name, as a buzz overtook his groin and testosterone blocked all rational thought.

  Moaning, she sunk her hands lower, rubbing over the bulge in his pants until his arousal was digging into her, hard and powerful. Jamie had her stop to get his clothes off, because the scrape of his cock against his briefs was way too painful. Then, she got onto her fours, lifted up her dress over her waist, dropped her panties, and stuck her ass in the air, grinding her butt against his erect penis.

  Leading him downwards, she closed her thighs around his him and smeared the moist heat between her legs all over his cock. “This is how damp my panties feel when you’re around. You make me so wet, Jamie.”

  She squeezed her inner thighs around his length, and he lost his breath. “Fuck...”

  Being embedded between her hot vagina and her cool flesh was heavenly. He’d never experienced something like it before.

  “I’m never again sleeping with a woman who doesn’t have big thighs.” His husky whisper rode over her neck. “This is the best damn feeling in the world.”

  “Oh yeah?” she challenged, bringing her hands into the mix.

  She teased circles around the tip of his cock that was already dripping with her wetness. Ecstasy hummed in his blood and with every clench of her thighs, every little swipe of her finger. The muscles around his groin tightened in anticipation of his inevitable climax.

  But he didn’t want to come yet. It was too soon. There was so much more to see and do.

  Jerking himself away from her, he spread her dripping folds and rubbed her swollen clit. Crying, she lifted her butt up. “Lighter.”

  “Sorry, baby.”

  Switching his touch to a tease, Jamie played over her clit with gentle, playful movements.

  Warm honey poured from between her legs and drenched his fingers. Bending down, he licked her sweet wetness. A ragged gasp drifted out of her.

  “Take me now.” It was a desperate command.

  “What about the blowjob you promised?” Mocking her with a twist of his lips, he continued playing her with his fingers.

  “Later,” Bella said, voice quivering. Her impending climax must already be getting to her. “I’ll return the favor with interest.”

  “Okey-dokey.”

  He was glad to finish what he’d started. Going down on her again, Jamie kept to a steady rhythm with his tongue until she was screaming in release. And then he tasted the last drop of her and wiped his mouth.

  Mission accomplished.

  “Uh...” Her chest rose and fell with fast exhales as she sunk into the full beauty of her orgasm. He put his hand over hers, and enjoyed the moments of stillness with her. Having some peace in the midst of sex was great.

  “Okay. Now it’s my turn.” Tossing, Bella forced herself up from bed.

  Sometimes he envied how quickly women could recover.

  “Did you get what I asked you to get?”

  “Right here.” He had a condom ready for her.

  Tearing the packet, she wiped away the fluid on his penis with a tissue before rolling it on. Then she knelt on the floor so the height difference was ideal and steered the aroused flesh in her hand to her mouth. Swiping her tongue over his aroused length, she lightly brushed over his balls, too, before taking all of him into her mouth. Deep.

  And then she sucked it hard enough that he came.

  “Jesus.” Jamie’s voice was cut up by heavy breaths, as strong currents shook his body.

  The wet, slurping sounds she made became erotic background music as he succumbed to the heady high of an orgasm and spilled—thankfully not in her throat. He wasn’t sure Bella would have liked that.

  She freed him from her mouth. Laying back, he enjoyed his orgasm to the fullest, screwing his eyes shut and letting every muscle bathe in the glorious release.

  “You’re something,” he said, when he was normal again, dangling his fingers between strands of her hair. “Do you think you could do that again someday?”

  “I could do it again right now.” She slapped her lips together.

  “Could you?” With a giant grin, he slid his arm under her waist and scooped up her body. “Then do it.”

  *

  “Mmmm,” Bella moaned, resting her cheek against cotton sheets as the last traces of her climax evaporated from her sated body.

  Jamie’s low, even breaths alternated with hers.

  He stroked her hair gently, murmuring, “That was something.”

  “I know,” she whispered, crawling closer to him under the sheets. “I can’t believe what we just did.”

  “Yeah.” His eyelids rolled up, and he shook off some of his post-orgasmic inertia.

  Shooting his hand to the bedside, he passed her a bottle of water, along with a box of Ferrero Rocher he must have gotten at Duane Reade with the condoms. “Listen. I know you said you hate chocolate, but I just had to get some.”

  Unwrapping the golden foil, she dunked one round, caloric ball into her mouth. Sugar coated her tongue, delicious and heady, almost as heady as the orgasms she’d had.

  “You could change my mind about chocolate,” she said.

  “Oh, I just remembered...how was your date with the banker? Did he propose to you? Have you booked a wedding planner yet? I hear they book out quickly.” He poked her nose.

  “Shut up,” Bella sneered, slapping away his teasing grin.

  This was not the ideal conversation to be having after an orgasm, but it was better than murmuring ‘I love you’ or ‘This was the best orgasm of my life,’ neither of which meant anything.

  “Really, was he so bad that you had to call me and beg me for sex?” His chest pressed against hers.

  “I did not beg you. I seduced you.” Wriggling, she stole another delicious little Fererro Rocher. The rustling of the wrapper tearing echoed loudly. “I’m sorry. You don’t mind, do you?”

  Expecting him to judge her, click his tongue, make fun of her binging, she almost put the chocolate back, but instead, he handed her the box. “Not at all. It’s all for you. I bought another box, too, just in case.”

  “I’m going to get fat if I eat all that,” she chided, swallowing.

  “Don’t worry. You’ve already burned your calories during sex.” He trailed his hand over her thighs. “And since I love your curves, it’s in my interest to ensure you don’t lose them.”

  She shivered when he fed her another piece.

  Tears almost wet her eyelashes. For crying out loud, why was she getting so emotional over him feeding her chocolates? It was a perfectly normal and legitimate thing for a man to do. Even sweet.

  And that was the problem. She didn’t want him to be sweet. She didn’t want him showing her everything she’d lose in three months.

  Dragging the edge of the bedsheet over her cheeks, she dried her face and succumbed to temptation again when he fed her another chocolate. But when the flavors melted on her tongue, she tasted longing rather than hazelnut.

  Pushing the box towards him, she said, “Your turn now. I don’t want to be a greedy pig.”

  He put the box next to the lampsha
de. “Don’t be so harsh on yourself. Everyone has the right to the pursuit of happiness.”

  “This is not the pursuit of happiness. It’s the pursuit of obesity.”

  He patted her head. “You need to do something about that self-judgment.”

  “I’m trying to.” To make herself feel better, Bella scooched over to his side and cuddled. “My classes end early on Thursday. Do you think we could do this again? Actually, could we just make this a regular thing?” she whispered against his ear, nibbling his earlobe.

  She had no idea where they were going or what they were doing. All she knew was she was in love with this heady feeling. And she was ready to barter some of her secure future for more of it.

  “Ha. Giving up on your search for your future husband already?” he taunted.

  “Temporarily suspending it,” she replied. “I’ll go back to it in the new year.”

  Three months wouldn’t kill her. Not much, anyway.

  “If that’s what you want.”

  “It’s what you’ve made me want,” Bella shot, mildly bothered that he behaved like this was a foregone conclusion.

  Freeing himself from the tangle of sheets they were lying under, Jamie got to his feet. “I need to take a piss.”

  Jamie’s body moved in the shadows and then light covered his skin.

  She’d never seen him naked before. While she’d felt some muscles under her skin, she could not have been prepared for the gorgeous male body that she was now witnessing.

  Jamie was mind-blowingly handsome. He had no six pack, but his stomach was flat, taut and in.

  “If you want to go, the other bathroom’s down the hall.” Pointing his finger, he shut the door to the bathroom that was attached to his master bedroom.

  Bella didn’t have to pee, but she didn’t want to be here alone where sin, in the form of more chocolates, was close at hand, so she made her way to the other bathroom.

  Her reflection crept up on the mirror as she locked the door behind her. He must be having someone in to clean his place, because in her experience, most men did not clean their own toilets so well.