Who Do You Love?: Trapped in Love with a Thug

by Tatyana Jhane'

  “Yes, it’s time to start pushing,” the doctor said. “On the count of three, I need you to push as hard as you can until you can’t anymore.”

  “One, two, three, push.”

  I pushed as hard as I could and two more pushes later, Baby Kaleb was born. They cut the cord, cleaned him up, and handed him to me. My baby boy was the cutest baby I had ever seen and I was not saying that because he was my baby. He had light brown eyes and dimples like his daddy, but he had my auburn hair and cinnamon skin tone. I was in love.

  It was a love that I never experienced before, the love of my first child. I will do anything to protect my baby boy. He will always come first in my life.

  “Mommy loves you,” I said, and he looked up at me and smiled and instantly melted my heart.

  The door opened and we all stared waiting for whoever it was to come in. We all were in for the shock of our lives when DeShon walked in.

  “I’m here to see my baby,” he said.

  “Nigga, this is not your fucking baby now get the fuck out of my room. My son don’t even look anything like you. You better hide too, because you know that they are looking for you. You lucky I want my man here with me right now because if I didn’t then you would not be standing right here much longer,” I yelled at him.

  Kaleb started crying. It was like he knew something was wrong with his mommy. I rocked him to calm him down and stared at DeShon until he left the room. I had a feeling that he would be making another pop up before I got out the hospital.

  Chapter 19

  Ace

  I knew that Kaleb was mine as soon as he came out. He looked like a perfect mixture of Tanesha and I. He had my dimples and eye and T’s hair and skin color. I knew my son was going to be a heartbreaker once he got older. I just didn’t need him bringing in any babies until he was out my house.

  As soon as I saw him, it was like relief flooded all throughout my body. My baby just gave me my first child and it’s like I found a whole new type of love for her than I had before.

  When that nigga DeShon walked in, anger consumed my entire presence. I could’ve killed him right then and there and that’s when my baby went off on his ass. I loved seeing this side of her because she never really came out of character. She had my dick hard, but too bad we had to wait for six weeks before we could get it in again.

  I snapped out of my thoughts though because this nigga still had me fucked up. He could live today though, because my son and my baby was more important and I couldn’t leave them right now. But best believe I had some of my niggas following him.

  “Damn baby, you got a nigga’s dick hard, going off on that nigga like that,” I told her.

  “Well, for six weeks you gone have blue balls my nigga,” she said to me and started cracking up like she just said the funniest shit to mankind.

  “You mean you gone have a sore throat and jaws for six weeks,” I told her, and I was serious as shit. I couldn’t hold out that much. Shit, I can’t even hold out right now because she really had a nigga ready to fuck. I knew that she was not about to suck my dick right now but I needed something.

  Congratulations daddy!

  I looked down at my phone and saw that this hoe I used to smash back before T and I got together texted me. I read it and put my phone back in my pocket before another text came through.

  I know you, and I know that you can’t wait those six weeks so don’t worry daddy, I got you. You know where I stay.

  I felt like my dick grew a couple more inches at that text. I know it’s wrong but shit, T and I fuck literally every day. How can I go from every day to not at all for six weeks? A nigga don’t believe in jacking off when there were plenty of bitches ready to fuck whenever.

  I know it was fucked up, but I was going to take her up on her offer. I just really could not wait that long. I love T with all my heart but sex is also a major part of a relationship. I know y’all thinking I sound stupid but hey, to each his own. What T doesn’t know will not kill her.

  I’ll be there in 15 minutes.

  I shook away the guilty feeling that was brewing and made my way over there to get what I needed.

  Mo

  I was outside the hospital trying to get my mind right. I was still feeling some type of way about the whole situation with Tae. I didn’t want to act too weird about it though, because I didn’t want Brandon to start to get suspicious about me and him.

  After everything that Tae told me, I started to feel what I used to feel for him and I hated that. He always had a way of pulling me back in. I didn’t want to ruin everything that Brandon and I had going on because truth be told, I was very happy with him but part of me still wondered ‘what if’.

  “Damn, watch where you going!” I yelled until I realized who it was that bumped me.

  “Oh shit, my bad Mo. Damn, you was about to beat the shit out of a real nigga,” Ace laughed.

  “Shit, you right! And you need to watch where you walking for real too! But I’ma let you pass. Where the hell you going in such a hurry anyways, nigga? You just had a damn baby, y’all can get DeShon’s ass later,” I told him now starting to wonder where he was off to.

  “I’m going to handle some business right now, but I will be back before you know it, sis. Peace,” he said then continued to rush off.

  “Mm hmm, let me find out,” I said as I watched him run to his car. While watching him, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I, too, was being watched and it was starting to make me feel some type of way.

  Just as I was about to go back in the hospital to check on my girl, I saw Tae talking to a nigga that looked real familiar before he went inside, then Tae came heading over to me. I checked my phone and saw a text from Brandon.

  Baby, I will be back there later to come and get you, okay?

  Okay baby.

  When I looked up Tae was staring in my face.

  “Nigga, why are you all in my damn face being nosey and shit?” I asked Tae with a smile.

  “I see a nigga still can bring out that beautiful smile in you though, so I know you ain’t tripping about me being in your face,” he said and I can’t even lie, he was right about that. Damn, why was he making me feel this way. I am a happily engaged woman. I don’t know why I can’t get that through my damn head right now.

  “Anyways. Who was that man you were talking to? He looked real familiar like he was somebody that I knew,” I asked him. I just couldn’t pinpoint where it is that I knew him from.

  “Oh yeah, you know him, that’s Jay. Remember, he used to date T?”

  “Oh shit, yeah, I do now. Why is he here? I hope he not here to start no mess like you are trying to do.” I told him because I already knew the game these niggas here tried to play. When they have you, they try and act like they don’t want you but when they can’t have you, they want you. Why is it always on their terms? Shaking my head; these niggas won’t ever act right.

  “I’m not here to stir any mess that does not want to be stirred,” Tae had the nerve to say.

  “I don’t know what you are talking about,” I said and turned to walk away. I do not have time for his shit today. He grabbed my arm and pulled me back to him and started to lead me in the direction of his car.

  “Nigga, what are you doing?” I screamed.

  “Girl, come on, I ain’t gonna do nothing to you. I just wanna sit and talk to you. Don’t act scared of the nigga you still in love with,” he said and I rolled my eyes and against my better judgment, I followed after him to his car.

  He opened the door on the passenger side of the car and let me in. Then, he went around to the driver’s side and started up the car.

  “Tae, I thought you said that we were just going to talk in the car?” I asked him.

  “We are; I am just moving us into the parking garage where there are less cars. I don’t want anyone watching us,” he said, and I agreed because I didn’t want it getting back to Brandon that I was alone with another man in his car, or that I was alone with Tae in hi
s car. I know that he would trip on me as soon as he heard that news. Also, I was glad that he was moving the car in there because I still was having this eerie feeling that someone was watching me.

  We pulled up into the parking garage and he parked the car in a secluded area and turned to face me. We stared at each other for a few moments before either of us uttered a word. I honestly couldn’t hide the fact that there were still strong feelings for this man, despite everything that he has done to me, but I just can’t be a fool for him anymore.

  “So what is it that you wanted to talk to me about?” I broke the silence and asked.

  “Us. I see that you still feeling a nigga and I want you to make a move when you ready. You think that this is the nigga for you but you know that it’s me. It always has been and it always will be,” he said.

  “I don’t know why you think that you even deserve the time of day from me because you don’t,” I said and that’s when it happened. I should’ve known by the way that he was looking at me while I was talking that this was about to happen.

  He leaned into me and said, “You just wasted your breath saying that to me,” and he kissed me so hard and passionate it took my breath away. Once he pulled away, he looked at me and it was on. We went to ripping each other’s clothes off right there in the car.

  He was sucking on my neck but I moved him out of the way. I wasn’t trying to do all that lovey dovey shit, I was just trying to fuck. I didn’t want to get a hicky on me and have to explain that shit to Brandon. He pulled my sundress over my head and pushed my seat all the way back. He started licking all over my titties and I would be lying if said that this wasn’t feeling good.

  He got down on the floor and started sucking my pussy like it was the last supper. He was really doing the damn thing. He pulled out a condom and in one swift motion, he entered me.

  “Damn Mo, your pussy is so tight! I can’t believe that you were holding out on me for so long. I gotta have this shit forever,” he said as I rolled my eyes. Again, I wasn’t trying to hear all the lovey dovey shit—I was trying to fuck.

  He was fucking the shit out of me and I didn’t want to admit it, but his dick was pretty good. He started pumping faster so I knew that he was about to nut and I was glad, because the guilt was starting to settle in. I can’t believe I cheated on a man that has been nothing but good to me from the moment that he met me. I had to get out of his car and get away from him.

  Once he pulled out, I cleaned myself up and I got out of the car. I couldn’t be around him anymore right now.

  "Mo, what’s wrong, where are you going?” he asked.

  “I can’t believe that I just did that with you knowing that I have a good man at home. I just need to clear my head before I go back inside,” I told him and hurried away before he could say anything else to me.

  As I was walking away, I noticed that a car was following me. I didn’t turn around to check it out because I figured that it was just Tae making sure that I got back safely. Boy was I wrong.

  Before I knew it, I was being blindfolded or something was put over my head, and they put something over my mouth that made me start to feel lightheaded. The last thing that I remembered hearing was Tae screaming my name, and then I blacked out.

  Chapter 20

  Tanesha

  I couldn’t believe that I was a mommy! As I looked into my son’s eyes, I felt nothing but joy. I was so happy nothing and could change how I was feeling at the moment. Not even my so called fiancé rushing out of this hospital as soon as his son was born.

  I’m going to fuck him up if I find out he out there hoeing while I was in the hospital from just having his child. Oh yeah, we gone have to have a talk about that.

  As soon as I put my baby back in the little makeshift crib that they had in here, the door opened.

  “Nigga, where the fuck have you been and how you gone leave here right after I just had your damn baby?” I yelled before he even walked in, and boy did I get the shock of my life when I realized who it was that walked through the door.

  I mean, I can’t say that I was really surprised because I knew that it was only a matter of time before he came, but I still was shocked.

  “Well, well, well, look who it is,” I said to him.

  “How you doing, baby? Did you miss me?” he said. I looked him up and down and I couldn’t lie, he looked really good. And I did miss his ass at times but he wouldn’t know that.

  “No, I didn’t miss you. What brings you by?” I said. I mean, it’s not like I have seen him a lot in the past couple of years. If he was acting right, then I would have never even gotten with DeShon in the first place.

  “I heard my woman was having a baby by another nigga and engaged, and I had to come see this shit for myself.”

  “Jay, let’s not even go down this road. I’m not your woman anymore, remember? You left me for no apparent reason and you got another bitch pregnant and I was still going to stay with your ass, but you just up and left one day and now all of a sudden wanna come back and question what I’m doing and who I’m doing it with? Nigga please!” I said.

  I see you still got that stank ass attitude that nobody can deal with except me. That’s probably why that nigga ain’t here right now but good, because I don’t wanna fuck your nigga up on the day that you had my baby. Does he know that this baby is mine?” he said.

  This nigga was tripping. Now he knows that this baby was not his. Shit, if it was anyone else’s, at the most, it would be DeShon’s baby, but we already ruled that out. He got some nerve. When I tried to give him a baby, he wound up getting another bitch pregnant so I ain’t trying to hear anything he saying about that.

  “So where is he?” Jay asked. That’s a good question that I wish I knew the answer to myself, but I was not about to let him know that so he could try and swoop in and ruin my life again?

  “He is minding his business. He is wherever he needs to be,” I told him hoping that he would believe my lie.

  “You think that I am going to believe that little lie that you don’t even believe yourself? Don’t play yourself. You know that I know you better than any nigga out here so come harder than that little stunt that you just tried to pull out on me,” he told me. I can’t believe that he could still to this day—know when I was lying.

  “Okay, I don’t know where he is at. All I know is that I told him that he can’t get none for weeks then he got a text on his phone and then he rushed out of here. There,” I told him and as I thought about what he said, something registered in me about where he could be. This motherfucker thought that I was stupid.

  “I know you not letting niggas get over on you. That’s the most obvious shit in the world. You better check on him because I don’t want you to get hurt. I know that I hurt you before, but I would never do anything like that to you if that is what’s going on,” he said to me and I believed him.

  I didn’t know if it was my hormones because of me just having a baby, or if I was really thinking that a man that did everything for me and that treated me really well could hurt me like this, but nowadays you can’t put anything past anyone. I turned to look at Jay and that’s when I noticed that he was inching closer and closer to me. Before I knew it he kissed me and it felt just like old times. I still got butterflies in my stomach from his touch.

  As our kiss deepened, I felt someone staring at us so I pushed him back to get a good look and see who it was. When I saw who it was I instantly felt like shit. Why did I let this go this far?

  Chapter 21

  Ace

  After I left from talking with Mo, I raced to my car to go fuck with this bitch real quick. I know I’m not shit for it but hey, a man wants what a man wants.

  I drove to Lisa’s house and as soon as she opened the door, it was on. She was standing there butt ass naked, with some red bottoms on. She looked good as fuck and my dick thought so too. I pulled my pants down and took off my shirt and walked over to her stroking my dick.

  She got on her k
nees and crawled to me. This bitch was making my dick harder and harder, especially since I saw that she was about to suck my dick something serious. One thing that I loved about this girl is that her head game is something serious. Not as good as my baby T’s, but she will do for now until T’s six weeks are up.

  Lisa was sucking the skin off my dick and I felt my nut rising but I didn’t want to nut just yet, so I pushed her up and she laid back spread eagle. I think the bitch thought that I was about to eat her out, but I ain’t doing that shit for her; only T gets this tongue.

  I pulled out a condom, slid it on and rubbed my dick at her opening. She was wet as fuck and I didn’t wanna keep her waiting, so I slowly entered her so she could get used to my dick but after a couple of them slow strokes, I started blowing her back out. She was meeting my every stroke trying to act like she could take it, but the scratching and biting that she was doing to me let me know that I was beating that shit up. I was about to nut so I took my dick out, pulled off the condom and she sucked until I came and she swallowed up every drop.

  “Thanks daddy, call me when you want some more,” Lisa said to me as I started putting my clothes back on.

  “Aight. I’ll be seeing you soon, ma,” I said and headed back to the hospital.

  When I walked in, I thought my muthafuckin’ eyes were deceiving me. Tanesha was letting some nigga that I didn’t even know, kiss her. I stared for a little bit because I was just too shocked. I know that I just got back from fucking Lisa but damn, T didn’t see the shit, so what the fuck.

  “Tanesha, what the fuck is this?” I screamed and she jumped back from dude and the nigga turned and looked at me like he had a fucking problem with me; like I was the one who was not supposed to be here.

  “Nigga, don’t yell at her like that. What the fuck does it look like?” this nigga had the nerve to say to me. I see this nigga didn’t know who the fuck he was talking to but he was about to find out.