The Goddesses Throne

by A. Kingsley

  A gasp erupted from Maximus, his eyes darkened with sadness.

  “I knew that this wasn’t true. I went up the stairs and she was,” the last word barely left his throat, his voice was vibrating, cracking, “gone.”

  Before he could stop himself, the tears returned to his eyes and he sobbed, burying his head into his stained fingers.

  Maximus hesitated, before moving forward and wrapping his arms around Cassius.

  Eventually, the prince of Excidium quieted.

  There was a comforting silence between them, but Cassius quickly broke it as he wiped his tears and pulled away from the king’s embrace. “She would not have done that to herself. It was my father, he practically admitted it. And as an added bonus when I got here, I was told that my cousin is dead, but I’m not sure that’s true because I haven’t seen it with my own eyes,” his lip was quivering, his eyes started to fill with tears, he couldn’t keep numb for as long as he wanted to.

  Maximus debated for a moment. After a few seconds of hesitation, he opened his arms once more to invite Cassius in for a second hug. The prince fell into the young king's arms, he shivered and let a few more tears fall onto the others lap.

  “I am so sorry Cassius. Losing three people in the span of a few hours must not be easy to handle or process. I remember what I felt when my parents died. Well, when my mum died. Her body disappeared so I can never be sure, but she hasn’t come back, so we assumed she died and the invaders took her away out of spite. Like you, I wasn’t fond of my father, his death didn’t affect me in an emotional sense. My mother on the other hand, she was kind and gentle. Her and Adria always got along well.” He placed a hand on the other's back and sighed. “I’m sorry for treating you poorly. You were not responsible for her death. I know this because if you were truly like your father, you wouldn’t have come here, you wouldn’t have helped Clare, you wouldn’t have tried to stop what they did to Antoine. I’ve killed, Cassius, it is a part of life. Something we don’t want to do, but sometimes we must and though there were other ways to relieve your anger, I’ve made the same mistake. I’ve killed in my fury.”

  Cassius didn’t bother to look up. Maximus’s kind words had melted him. Maximus didn’t blame him anymore, he was nice to him, he too had been in a similar situation. Cassius was curious if his mother’s death had provoked his killings as well, but he didn’t ask him. “I wanted to apologize as well. I’m sorry about your mother, she didn’t deserve that,” Cassius said as he sat up again.

  “Neither did yours. I still feel my mother with me, if you pray, maybe it’ll be the same for you.” Maximus tilted his chin up and then looked back down. “I better go check on Julius and tell him that you’ve arrived. Will you let me show you to a bath? That’s the most blood that I’ve ever seen on any person who’s still alive,” Maximus said.

  Cassius awkwardly lifted himself up from the floor and wiped his eyes with his stained fingers. His head hung in shame at how vulnerable he had been.

  He felt Maximus’s long arm brush his shoulder. “Chin up, it's okay to cry.”

  That was all the two of them had said. Cassius was quiet as Maximus walked him to somewhere that he could bathe. Maximus brought him to a guest bedroom with a bath inside. He set down Cassius’s bag and stepped out of the room. “I’m going to have the servants prepare you a meal. Would you like someone to assist you?”

  “No, it’s okay,” he whispered, “thank you Maximus.”

  The king nodded and headed out the door, gently closing it behind him.

  After he had helped Cassius fix a bath, Maximus headed over to Julius’s room and opened the door. His twin brother’s face was stuffed into a pillow, the fabric hid his tears. Maximus sat on the edge of the bed, his face solemn. The anger had faded and sadness took its place. “Julius,” he whispered softly.

  His twin brother took his face out of his pillow and pouted, his eyes were red. Julius leaned into his brother who held him close to his chest, Maximus’s clothes reeked of death, they smelt like Cassius. “I promise that I’ll get back at Erebus for what he did. I’m going to declare war on Excidium soon. It is about time that Erebus pays for his actions. He wants a war and I’m going to give it to him. Except, we are going to win this war. I promise that Antoine will not have died in vain.”

  “What did they do with Antoine’s body and why do you smell like that?” Julius hiccuped, ignoring his brother’s previous statement.

  “They took his body back to the Pax palace and I think it’s best that you head there. Go see Sage and grieve with him near. They’ll probably have the funeral in their kingdom as long as it’s alright with his family. I’ll send a letter to his family at once to inform them of the news and I shall provide them with monthly payments. As much as I want to be there for you, you need to be there, with the Pax’s. I’ll be too busy here to help you grieve. And there’s something else that I need to tell you. Cassius is here right now, it explains the smell.”

  Julius shot up from where he was laying and wiped his tears, “what? Why would he come here and show his face?”

  Maximus exhaled, “he was never a part of this. You know that his father did this, his mother and him were not a part of Antoine’s death. Cassius is here because he’s alone. His mother died tonight. Erebus, that cruel man, killed her. He thinks that his cousin died tonight too, but he’s not positive. Cassius was covered in blood when he arrived. His mother’s blood. He’s washing up right now, but he wanted to apologize to you. Really we should all be apologizing for how harshly we have treated one another.”

  “You’re right. We have all witnessed death, we should be cheering for one another, not tearing one another down. You’re right, him and I have to go to the Pax family at once even if we don’t want to.”

  Maximus adjusted his position, “I hope you don’t blame Clare or yourself for any part of Antoine’s death.”

  “Why would I do that?”

  “Because I can sense it. You know in your heart that if you never let Antoine travel with Clare and Clare had never been engaged to Cassius, that Antoine would still be here. I don’t want you to think that way. He loved her, he did not regret traveling with her.”

  “How do you know that?” Julius asked.

  “Because he wrote poems about her. When we change out his quarters, you can take his book, I think he would be okay with you reading it.”

  “Right,” Julius said, “must we leave now?”

  “I think you should. Pack a bag. I’ll see you soon, you should come back home when you feel a bit better.”

  It was the longest bath that Cassius had taken in a long time and he had cried through every moment of it. He hadn’t remembered the last time that he had shed so many tears. He had to scrub every inch of his body with the sponge, some places harder than others in attempts to get all the blood off. He felt sick watching the once clear water turn a murky red. As soon as he had got all of the blood off of his skin and cleaned himself with a bar of soap, he washed his hair and then got out of the bath. His tears seemed to stop and he hoped he had emptied himself of them so that he could finally breathe. He was quick to dry himself off with a towel and pull on a pair of loose pants and a big, clean shirt. He had a feeling sleep wouldn’t come tonight or the night after and he doubted he’d be staying here. He had to go see Clare. It would be hard to face her, but he had to go. He slipped on the pair of slippers he had brought and stared at himself in the mirror, his lips curled in disgust. He felt the most human that he had felt in the past few months, so vulnerable and so full of emotions. He felt wicked and vile, just like how he believed humans were at their core. ‘I won’t do it again,’ he thought as he stared at himself in the mirror. He ripped his face away from the glass, unable to look at himself any longer.

  He met Julius at the front of the castle, they were both in comfortable clothes and held small bags.

  “I’m sorry,” Cassius said loudly, attempting to make up for all his years of silence.

  Julius sh
ook his head. “I’m sorry as well. I hope we can mend our feud now, if that’s alright. It was wrong of us to treat you poorly when you had already been hurting so much.”

  “I returned the same hatred, I wasn’t any better, but yes, maybe we will be good mates someday.” Cassius turned to Maximus, who shook his hand and then gave his brother a hug.

  “The carriage is ready for you two. You’ll arrive late in the night, so remember your manners,” he joked.

  “I’m sure no one will be sleeping soundly,” Cassius mumbled.

  “Right,” Julius agreed. “If you’d like to eat before we head out, there is a plate waiting for you.”

  “I appreciate it, but I feel too sick to eat right now,” Cassius said.

  Inside of the carriage, Julius ended up falling asleep. Cassius wasn’t sure how, but he didn’t want to judge, perhaps this was his way of burying his emotions. Cassius on the other hand was rehearsing what he was going to say to Clare. Each sentence was awkward and he scrapped about a dozen of them. He wanted to know if she was okay, but that was a stupid question in itself, of course she wasn’t okay and neither was he. He wanted to protect her. She was now a wanted woman and there would be people storming the outside of the palace in hopes to catch a glimpse of magic. He wanted to run away with her, but she was a princess who couldn’t run forever. Nonetheless, he was the prince who fled. Surely they could work something out. He thought he might be able to avoid her, but Clare would never avoid him, so that plan would not work. Pondering the situation was beginning to stress him out. His fingers picked at the edges of his shirt.

  He didn’t have any more time to think because the carriage arrived at the palace and a hundred people stood outside with torches and angry stares. He couldn’t even believe that he thought of avoiding her after seeing this. A small, almost non existent portion of him wanted to slaughter all of those people and give into the monster that he was becoming, but no they didn’t deserve that and he truly didn’t want to kill them. He just wanted them all gone. He wanted to shout at them and scream, but Clare wouldn’t want that.

  Julius had opened his eyes, he peered out the window and murmured, “oh my.”

  “I know,” Cassius mumbled.

  The two of them had to push their way through the crowds. There were people yelling at them, telling them that it was unsafe to go inside. They were yelling questions at Cassius, wondering whether he knew if Clare truly had magic. He ignored them all. He wasn’t wearing his crown and he wished that for one second, they could treat him like a human being and not some royal doll. The door was pulled open by the guards who had been expecting him.

  Cassius barely got a chance to step inside the door, Cisily ran towards him with her arms open. He embraced her and she inhaled the sweet scent of his usual cologne that he had put on before he got in the carriage.

  “How is Theo? Did he come with you?”

  Cassius bit down on his lip. ‘How was he supposed to greet her?’ He couldn’t say that her brother might be dead, right in front of everyone. He refused to deliver the news that way. “I think he’s alright, we will talk about him soon. I just need a minute.”

  “Right, I’m sure there are much more pressing matters,” Cisily said.

  Cassius shook his head. “A little, but only selfishly so. I need to see Clare and Gracielle and make sure that they are alive and well. I hate to brush you off Cis, but I am engaged to Clare and I have a duty to make sure that she is alright.”

  “I understand. They’re all in the dining area drinking tea. Go ahead and go see them,” she said.

  Cassius let his eyes flicker to Julius who was already heading that way. “No, I’m not going without you. Why aren’t you in there with them Cis? You’re a guest. Is it because they excluded you?”

  “Oh no, of course not, I was waiting here for you,” she linked her arm with his and he led her down the hallway. “It’s been a bonkers day, but I knew you’d be here soon and I didn’t want to leave you without a greeting from your cousin.”

  Cassius walked with her down the hall. Cisily seemed to be holding up well. She didn’t know Antoine so she wasn’t aching, but she had to watch a murder and though it wasn’t her first, they never got easier. He didn’t want his uncertain news to ruin her calm aura, but it would have to, not now, but later, in private. He’d never publicly humiliate her, she didn’t deserve that. Cassius sucked in a breath as they rounded the corner to the dining area. Clare was the first thing on his mind. Sure he was hurting, but Clare was too and he cared more about her than he did himself. He had learned to love her, his heart grew for her, it burned for her. Cisily let go of his arm just before they entered the room. Cassius kicked off his slippers and then stepped into the room, suddenly in view, on display for the grieving family. Julius had already joined Sage, they were leaning up against one another, their eyes closed. Gracielle had a comforting hand on Clare’s shoulder. Clare looked defeated, there were tear streaks on her red face, her clothes were the same as they had been earlier and her eyes were sunken. She opened her mouth to speak to him, but no words came out. ‘Could she tell he was upset? Could she see Adria’s ghost? What had she felt? Was there nothing to say? Did she know it all already?’

  He spoke first. “Clare,” he whispered, his eyes locked on her as if she were the only one in the room.

  She stood from her chair and gravitated towards him like a moth to a flame. Before he knew it, she was in his arms, a ball of sweet warmth.

  “How are you holding up?” he choked out. The smell of fresh roses was gone, she was withering, her heart slowly breaking. She placed her hand over his heart, she was scared that his would stop beating too. She rested her head on top of his chest where his heart lay and took in his scent like she always did. ‘Was her love for Antoine suddenly gone, or had she always loved him too?’ “Antoine told me about Adria,” her voice was soft and hushed, broken and damaged, the sweetness that normally consumed it was replaced by tiredness.

  He bit his lip and felt his eyes cloud. “Antoine is here?”

  “He is, I can speak to his ghost. He knows that we still need him.”

  “Where is he now?” Cassius asked quietly.

  “In the corner.” She looked over her shoulder and smiled softly, then she turned back to Cassius. “He wants us to be happy, but that’s beside the point. What happened to your mum? All he knows is that she’s not living because someone, he won’t tell me who, told him that she entered the spirit world.

  ‘How could he tell her without crying in front of everyone?’ Surely Sage was still judgmental and he didn’t want Gracielle, to lose the image of the strong boy that she had envisioned in her head. Luckily Julius got the hint, he must have been in this same situation before. Normally someone speaking for him would have bothered him, but it did not bother him now.

  “Erebus killed Adria,” there was a new anger in his voice. Clare looked up to Cassius’s face, about to burst into tears for him. She was upset for him, no one had ever been this upset for him before. He gently stroked her hair.

  “Is it true?” she whispered against his chest.

  He felt her wet tear roll down his shirt. He nodded and screwed his eyes tight, refusing to break down again.

  Sage straightened, for the first time, she felt as if he were worth her sympathy, “I’m so sorry Cassius,” she said.

  He didn’t want to push Clare away, but the attention was starting to get to him and his cheeks went hot. He gently stepped back from her and her hands fell. “Can we talk later?” he whispered. She nodded. They would talk later, but for now, they sat at the table.

  “The preparations for Antoine must be expensive, let me pay for them. I am sorry for my father's stupidity,” Cassius said.

  “We will split the cost with the Demetrias’s, do not worry about pitching in. It’s getting late, it’s been a long day. Why doesn’t everyone just try and head to bed,” Gracielle said.

  Cassius could feel the emotional exhaustion creeping over him,
but he refused to let himself fall into sleep. “Thank you, Gracielle. I’ll be with you in a second Clare, I need to talk to Cisily.”

  Clare made it hard for him to leave, but he did. He walked to Cisily who was waiting for him in the corner, her eyes were wet with tears, her aunt had just passed away. “Let’s go to the gardens,” he suggested. He walked with her to the gardens and together they sat on the bench surrounded by nature. The smell of Earth filled the crisp, clean air.

  “What was it that you wanted to talk to me about? Was it about Aunt Adria? I’m so sorry for your loss, Cass.”

  He gulped, shaking his head, “It is your loss too, but no, that’s not it. Before I came here, I went to the Demetrias’s. When I got out of the carriage, the coachman told me that,” he stopped. ‘How was he going to break this to her, he didn’t even know if it was true or if it was just some scheme that was made in order to get into his head.’ “Theo had passed, but I’m not sure if it’s true so please don’t panic until we know!”

  Cisily’s lips parted. Oddly enough, she wasn’t crying, she didn’t crumble and break down, she didn’t even panic. She re adjusted the way that she had been sitting and instead cleared her throat. There was worry in her eyes, but beyond that, she was cool and calm, calmer then she should have been.