Antithesis

by Allison Crews

  We walked into the little town and found a pub not far from where I was staying. Griffen ordered us lemon icebox pie and chocolate cake. Both were delicious.

  “So, where are you staying?” I asked.

  “Tonight I’m in a little hotel down the street from you,” he said. “Tomorrow, who knows?”

  “How long will you be here?” I asked.

  “Three days,” he said. “Unless you send me away earlier.”

  “But what about Argentina?”

  “Delayed it a week,” he said. “My friend understood. I told him I had some important business I needed to address.”

  We finished the desserts and wandered the streets for some time, admiring the stone, and inhaling the cool, misty moisture. It was so comfortable and so natural being together at last. He walked me back to the hotel and to my room.

  “Elliott,” he whispered into my neck. “I had a great time.”

  “Mmm.” I said, leaning my head against the wall and relishing his lips beneath my ear.

  “What time can I spring you tomorrow?” he asked.

  “I’m yours all day,” I said, his lips tickling my jaw and fingers playing through my hair.

  “Seven, then,” he said. “We’ll make a day of it.”

  “It better be good,” I said. “I’m not sure you can top dessert in Scotland for a second date.”

  He tilted my chin and looked at me, testing my reaction and holding the suspense of his kiss over me until I could hardly stand. My knees began to wobble, but I tried to stay focused on his deep, green, searching, longing eyes. He leaned in slowly, closed his eyes, and kissed me ever so softly on the lips. My whole body stiffened; I felt coiled like a spring wanting to crush him to me and pull him so close he could never leave – could never worry again that he was too dangerous to love. He pulled away, and I felt like I would drown in his dark, complaisant eyes.

  “Tomorrow,” he whispered. He turned, looked back at me, smiled once more, and was gone.

  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

  Chapter 18 - My Gift

  Horses, dear horses! Tornados in your manes!

  Such sensitive sensations, alert to the world – who guides your souls?

  Hooves lift you as wings – you charge on the green

  Inspired by God entertaining His heart...all of you rush to the sun.

  Daddy was asleep when I returned to the room. I, however, was not to be so lucky. Sleep evaded me for hours, for my mind was frantically trying to organize its thoughts about the evening’s revelations.

  At last, around 2:00 am, I slept. When I woke, there was a note from my father on the desk.

  Elliott,

  Enjoy your day with Griffen. Do not worry about me.Be in by 10:30 tonight.

  Love,

  Daddy

  I have got to know what Griffen said to him. Astounding.

  I got up, put on my jeans, boots, a turtleneck, and a sweater, packed my purse with mints, and grabbed my Barbour jacket. I had no idea what the weather nor Griffen’s moods would hold, but I was prepared. What an adventure we would have today!

  The concierge rang at 7:00 letting me know I had a guest, and I met him in the lobby. Griffen wore jeans and a Barbour, too, and I smiled to myself that we were thinking along the same lines.

  “Breakfast?” he asked.

  “Is all you think about food?” I asked, but smiled at him nonetheless. “Good morning to you, Griffen.”

  “I’m always hungry,” he said, smiling back at me. “Let’s eat here and talk about what you’d like to do today.”

  “Go ahead, feed me,” I said. “You pick what we’re having for breakfast. I like everything.”

  We had strawberries and toast for our first course. Then eggs, bacon, potatoes, juice, and hot tea to top it off. By the time we had finished the feast, I was not sure we’d be able to go anywhere.

  “So, Miss Marks,” he said. “What would you like to do today in Scotland? Today you pick, tomorrow’s my choice. If, of course, that’s all right with you.”

  “Sounds like a challenge to me,” I smiled. “Let’s find some horses. After all, we are in Scotland. Is there any way we could hunt?”

  “I don’t know where or how they foxhunt in Scotland now, but I’m sure I can find us some horses,” he said and disappeared to pay for our breakfast and make arrangements.

  I sat in the breakfast parlor overlooking the ruins alongside the ancient castle where we were staying. The day looked inviting…a little misty, but not enough to keep us inside. The gray sky looked as if it would change its mood at any moment, and I considered how similar to the Griffen I knew so far this country seemed.

  “All arranged,” he said. “We’ll just need to make a quick stop by the tack shop in the village beforehand. I am sure you wouldn’t mind a shopping excursion.”

  “Tack store! In Scotland! That’s almost as wonderful as finding horses,” I said and gave him a huge hug and a peck on the cheek.

  “So easy to please, I see,” he grinned.

  Our driver, Fìonan, filled us in on the town, the castle in which I was staying, and the history of the area. Most fascinating to me was how very very old this country was. Even the streets were old, and there were absolutely no power lines. It felt like we were driving through endless coffee table books – every view was a portrait.

  The tack shop had great hats, so of course, I made my first purchase. It was a dark brown waxed cotton hat that would serve double duty as something cute to cover my hat hair after the ride and keep me warm.

  “Try this on, too, Elliott,” Griffen said and handed me a hard hat.

  “I have one of these already,” I said.

  “You’ll want your own for the ride today,” he said. “Trust me.”

  I chose one in brown velvet, since I already had black, and found the wool and leather gloves I had hoped to get while I was here. We both bought some picture books about riding in Scotland. My boots would work for riding, so I bought some half chaps to wear over my jeans. The shop had everything a girl like me could want, and I could have stayed all day. Finally, Griffen pulled me away.

  “Time to go find the horses,” he said.

  Fìonan filled us in on the barn and their customs. He said he had known this family for years and that the scenery on the farm was beautiful. I could hardly wait to see this country from the back of a horse.

  At the barn, we met the owners, Barclay and Una Stewart, who presented us with two sturdy gray horses with long manes and enormous feet. I was glad to see they were wearing English saddles, but surprised that they had saddled only two.

  “Your horses, sir,” Mr. Stewart said as he handed them to Griffen.

  “What are their names?” he asked.

  “Yours is Wallace, and this one is Knox,” he said.

  “Do we have a guide?” I asked.

  “Not today, lass,” Mr. Stewart said. “It seems that Mr. Case is confident that you will be comfortable on your own.”

  “What if I’m not comfortable being alone with him?” I smiled.

  “Well, lass, I can offer you a shotgun, for hire, of course!” he laughed in his lilting, booming manner.

  “That won’t be necessary,” Griffen blushed. “If you will be kind enough, Mr. Stewart, to let me know the general lay of the property, we will return your horses within the next three hours.”

  We mounted our horses, and I was delighted that Griffen had suggested we acquire our own helmets, for the ones they rented to the riders were much less than flattering. They had a white skunk stripe across the top and were certainly not something I would have felt at all elegant wearing.

  As we left the barn at a walk, I could not help but think how amazing this day was, here, with him, in this place. Once we were out on the moor, he cantered up a trail leading over purple-brown fields that stretched for miles.

  The view was breathtaking. Shining silver rivers trickled through the stony hills and bright green valleys. Over one hill we could see an enormous castle i
n the distance. The anthracite gray sky reluctantly allowed the sun to point a few errant rays to the earth, and the resulting images were magnificent. I felt like I was floating across the top of the world.

  At the top of the hill, Griffen slid off Wallace and held Knox’s bridle so I could dismount. With the horses, his fluid motions never stopped as he secured their reins to some saplings, slipped a pair of hobbles onto Wallace just in case, and ran up their stirrups. Every move he made around them was always with purpose. His movement calmed them and settled them as if he were lulling them to sleep. All the confidence he had from years with horses transcended the continents. He was in his element.

  I knew he was not raised in my kind of world, so I longed to know more about him. What were his mysteries, and why did he have to look so fabulous on a horse? On any horse? He was such a gentleman, yet, why was he so afraid of recapturing that close relationship that he said he treasured with his mother? He can’t have just written off women altogether because of his father’s drunken rages. How could he think he could possibly be like him?

  “Elliott…” he said.

  He let my name hang in the air and hearing him say it like that stirred a waterfall of emotions. I watched his green eyes sparkle with mischief as he recognized my transparent reaction to his voice, to him speaking my name. His dark hair and smooth skin – perfectly proportioned muscles – all there – Tall, so confident – yet so unsure. What was it about his uncertainty and arrogance that made him so very appealing?

  He produced some white cheese, Ritz crackers, and bottles of fruit juice from his pockets and laid all these down on a spot overlooking the countryside. After arranging the snacks, he leaned back to admire his handiwork.

  “Hungry?” he asked.

  Was I? For him. His casual elegance and aloof eyes were driving me crazy. If he did not want me to attack him, or wasn’t planning on attacking me himself, then why did he bring me here? Alone? And why again is my own father ok with this?

  “I can always eat. You weren’t kidding about having it all arranged,” I said, as I selected a cheese and cracker sampling from his presentation. The food was great, and it gave me something to think about beside his shoulders. And what I would do if this moved along faster than I was willing. No shotgun.

  “What can I get you?” he asked. “Cheese? More bread?”

  “Food. Is that all that you think about?” I batted my dark eyes playfully at him.

  “Stop that now or we’ll not get to enjoy this,” he smiled indicating the spectacular view. “You’re making it difficult for me to behave.”

  “Am I, now?” I smiled. Would I even want to use that shotgun? Where are you, Grand?

  Both incidents at once were revelations, Grand’s silence, and his difficulty in behaving. I thought he only had that effect on me.

  “So what did you think about Knox?” he asked, leaning in just enough for me to catch his smell.

  “He’s lovely, and ever so responsive – for something so, large,” I said. It amazed me to find that the chunky horse was as comfortable in a heavy, but secure way, as Viva. He was certainly more sure-footed on this rocky terrain.

  He was quiet for a moment, and I studied his face while he looked over the hills. “Attraction,” I could hear Grand saying, thank goodness she was on duty. “Honey, you remember it’s not the same as love!” Oh, but I was all so very caught up in him for sure.

  My mind knew to stay away – too experienced with life’s dark side – too perfect – too cool – too totally unacceptable to my parents, or he was before yesterday – but who is he, really? I imagined his arms reaching over and wrapping themselves around me, pulling me closer to him, his smell blanketing me, as he lay beside me in the cool grass.

  “I’m glad you like him,” he said, and I jumped out of my reverie when I heard his voice.

  “By the way, Griffen,” I said. “Whatever did you say to convince my father that you were safe for me to date?” I could not wait to hear this and had almost forgotten to ask, so captivated I had been by this majestic place.

  “I’m not sure I’m ready to tell you,” he said, folding his arms behind his head and lying back on the grass.

  Holy heavens! I’m not going to be able to control myself. Please, Lord, send some restraining angels!

  I shrugged my shoulders and looked away, slightly turning my back to him. “Well, let me know when you are, because I’m certainly not convinced you’re so safe.”

  “And if I don’t?” he said in that low, fabulous grumble I found so ridiculously hard to resist.

  “You’ll have a long lonely day tomorrow,” I said and gave him an impish grin. “I’m the one that needs convincing, remember?”

  He reached up, pulled me down beside him, and wrapped me in his arms. His lips were on mine, and I could find nothing in me to resist. My whole body ached to be attached to him, to be close to every part of him. Where are those angels! Grand? Dear Lord, this has to stop. But, no – I don’t want this to end – we can’t be doing this – this is about to get way out of hand. Stop – help – Oh, just a minute more…

  Griffen’s embrace had synonymously provoked fireworks and alarms that I had never imagined could coexist within me – let alone between two people – and what I could distantly hear in my mind was a raging battle between longing and leaving, passion and principles, now feelings and forever commitments flashing fighting furiously to dominate this moment.

  And then it was over – he stopped kissing me – he had pushed me gently back and was looking deep into my eyes. I was so disoriented that I had no idea where we were or how we arrived. I concentrated on the light green streaks in his clear eyes and tried to regulate my breathing. He traced his fingers along my chin tilting it ever so slightly as if he wanted to make sure I was paying attention. As if I could see anything else…be anywhere else…

  “I promised your father,” he said, “that I would treasure you like the priceless rarity that you are. I told him that he could trust me completely with you and your honor. My intentions are to marry you, some day, if you will have me. And that if, at any moment, you decided I was not the person with whom you would consider spending the rest of your life, I would promptly leave you alone.”

  “So you’re the restraining angel?” I whispered under my breath, still delirious.

  “Your, what?” he asked.

  “Nothing. You are amazing,” I said and laid my head against his chest and closed my eyes against my swirling sights.

  We stayed just like that for a long while, resting in the comfort of each other’s presence. I could feel him breathing, his magnificent chest rising and falling – and hear his steady heartbeat. The cool, damp air had cleared my head, somewhat, and soon we were ready to continue our ride.

  We sat up, grabbed the last bites of cheese, collected our helmets, and walked over to the sleeping horses.

  “One more, please?” he asked as he tilted my chin to his face.

  “So, now you’re asking?” I said. “Such the gentleman.”

  He kissed me softly and my knees buckled. Thankfully, I was leaning against Knox’s sturdy frame, so it went unnoticed, I think.

  “We have about another two hours on this property,” he said. “Let’s take in all of it!”

  We galloped the gorgeous land covering every inch possible. The two horses were as excited as we were to be free to pick their speeds and paths over the countryside in the now misty afternoon. Their manes were long, and Knox’s stung my face as we galloped. I loved taking in this wonderland between his twitching, but confident ears while Griffen galloped alongside, slightly ahead of us. This ride should never end. Being here, with him – in this unforgettable place – I would treasure the moments forever.

  Back at the stables, Mr. Stewart’s son collected Wallace and Knox while we waited for Fionan to escort us to our next adventure. We wandered around the yard noticing that everything was made of stone and even the stalls had concrete floors. A peacock strutted by be
gging for handouts, and Mrs. Stewart gave us some peanuts to toss to him.

  Fionan arrived shortly and it was my turn, again, to choose the next adventure.

  “Where to, now?” Griffen asked.

  “Fionan, I am sure this beast beside me is hungry...as usual. Would you mind finding us a place to eat?” I said, smiling at Griffen. “Anything is fine with us, just surprise us.”

  “Ay!” he said. “I’ll know of just the place for you.”

  Griffen and I peppered poor Fionan with questions just to keep him talking. Scottish radio babbled in the background as we whizzed way too quickly around way too many dangerous corners for me to watch the road. I elected to listen to Fionan speak and look out the windows – way out the windows – and relish the scenery.

  At last, we arrived at a little pub and in keeping with our new traditions, I let Griffen determine what we would eat. He placed our order, leaned back in his chair, and eyed me across the table.

  “So, what time am I to return Cinderella?” he asked.

  “Not until 10:30, as usual,” I said. “What do you have in mind to occupy us now?”

  “Oh no, we are still on you today. Tomorrow, you’re mine,” he growled and leaned in close enough to make me want to run back to our hillside…

  “Well, then,” I said, blinking to clear my head. “After this, let’s just go back to where we are staying and wander around the village. I’ll leave Daddy a note checking in. No plans, let’s just do whatever the mood hits.”

  “For me, then, we’d not leave the hotel,” he said.

  “I’m shocked, Griffen! You are supposed to be watching my honor!” I said. “You made that gallant promise to my dear father, remember?”

  “Yes, there is that,” he snapped, but his eyes were twinkling.

  “Now that you mention it, though,” I said, “that was incredible of you to say that to him. The more I learn about you the more irresistible you become.”

  He was quiet and dropped his eyes. He may have blushed, but I couldn’t be sure.

  “I meant that, Elliott,” he said.