Antithesis

by Allison Crews

  “Carolyn and her husband are coming over for dinner tonight and so are some other neighbors. If you want, you and Griffen can join us,” she said. “What are you doing today?”

  “I’m giving him my Christmas present,” I said. “I’m taking him on a picnic at the barn. He’s coming over later this morning around 11:00.”

  “What did you get him?” she asked.

  “I bought the coolest picnic backpack for him that we can take on the horses, and am going to make the things we had in Scotland at our first picnic,” I said, leaving out the hour alone part.

  “He’ll love that,” she smiled. “What horses are you going to use?”

  “Robin’s renting me two for the afternoon,” I said as my cell phone buzzed. I looked down – text from Griffen.

  Good morning, Elliott. May I come over now?

  “Mother, he wants to come over – now!” I said.

  “I’m sure that hotel room is choking him,” Mother smiled. “Tell him I’ll have breakfast ready in 30 minutes.”

  “He won’t be able to resist your breakfast,” I said. “I’ve got to get everything ready for lunch – I wanted it to be sort of a surprise.”

  “Let him come over, Elliott,” she said. “I’d like a little time to talk to him, too. Your father’s had all the fun.”

  Give us 30 minutes. Mother wants to cook you breakfast, so come hungry.

  “Does he know you’re taking him riding today?” she asked.

  “Oh! I forgot,” I said and amended my message.

  Wear riding clothes. Jeans are fine.

  I ran to my room and got dressed. Most of the food for our picnic I had packed, but I needed to warm the soup and drinks. All the items fit neatly in the little backpack, and the picnic blanket folded into a saddle pad. I returned to the kitchen. In no time, Griffen was at the door.

  “Good morning, Little Vixen,” he said under his breath. My heart skipped a beat.

  “You’ll be useless after Mother’s breakfast,” I said. “Forget our lunch plans!”

  “Good morning, Griffen,” Mother said and she walked over and gave him a casual, one arm hug and patted his shoulder. “Sit down and let me feed you.”

  Griffen was helpless under her spell. He watched everything she did cautiously, like he couldn’t believe someone could be so relaxed in her element. Was he remembering his own mother? Mine had him transfixed, and I caught myself staring as he followed her every move.

  She was peppering him with questions that had him chatting away with her like they had known each other for years. His initial formal cautious demeanor was gone, and I couldn’t believe how much he was talking. She’s a witch, casting her spell over him like that. He’s as helpless as Hansel. She’s going to fatten him then slaughter him, and he doesn’t even mind.

  I smiled at the bizarre thought, but loved hearing him talk without the pressure of his eyes on mine. I could watch him relatively unobserved while we ate. An overwhelming urge to protect him and care for him rose in me unexpectedly. I wanted more than just to kiss him – I wanted to care for him, and watching my mother soothe him with her words made me realize what power she had over people, and most of all, her family. Impressive. I wonder if I will be able to do that, too, some day?

  Daddy returned from his morning walk and was pleasantly surprised to find Griffen in the kitchen. He strode over to give my mother and me a kiss, then extended his hand to Griffen.

  “Good morning, son,” he said. “I see she’s already poisoning you with her cooking.”

  “Hardly poison, sir,” Griffen said.

  “Not the bad kind, Griffen, just the kind that makes you want nothing other than hers!” he said with a grin.

  We talked and laughed, and Griffen fit in like he had known our family for years. I had rarely seen him so comfortable, but then again, we had not really spent much time together, and certainly not much time around other people.

  “We’re having the neighbors over this evening for dinner, Griffen,” Mother said. “You’re welcome to join us if you like.”

  “I have to get back to Memphis this afternoon, Mrs. Marks,” he   said. “But I really would like to do that another time.”

  Memphis was news to me, and I did what I could to keep the disappointment from showing on my face. I was hoping to have him to myself for at least a few more days.

  “I’m going to the office for a little while, dear,” Daddy said as he gave Mother a peck on the cheek. “Griffen, it was good seeing you again.”

  “You, too, sir,” Griffen said.

  There was a knock on the door, then a deep, familiar voice.

  “Mrs. Marks?” Ben said. “Mom sent over some stuff for you.”

  “In the kitchen!” she called. “Come on in, we’re just finishing breakfast.”

  He greeted everyone but stopped short when he saw Griffen.

  “Hello Ben,” Griffen said. Not unfriendly, but a little too amused.

  “Griffen,” Ben answered, no pleasantries. “I didn’t see your… truck.”

  “Rental car,” he said, all aloof and arrogant towards him, like Ben was a fly that just buzzed into the room. I would swear he was baiting him with his attitude, but I didn’t want to wait around and see how this would end.

  “We were just on our way to the barn,” I chirped, hoping Ben would get the signal.

  “Ben, would you like some breakfast?” Mother asked. I shot her an exasperated look – behind Ben’s back of course.

  “No, ma’am, thanks though,” he said. “See you later this afternoon.”

  “Tell your mom ‘thanks’, Ben. I owe her big for this,” Mother said.

  “I will.”

  He disappeared with Daddy leaving the three of us in the kitchen.

  “I have a few more things to put together, Griffen, then I’ll be ready to go,” I said.

  Most everything was already in my truck. The last bits of picnic gear packed, we left for the barn.

  “What’s this about leaving for Memphis, today?” I asked.

  “If we’re going to duck hunt and foxhunt this weekend, I have a lot of things to get ready,” he said. “But I still want my Christmas present.”

  “You have no idea how hard this has been to arrange,” I said. He was reaching over on my side of the car and stroking his fingers along my neck.

  “Stop that, Griffen, or we won’t get to the barn,” I said, hardly able to concentrate on driving. “You’re not playing fair.”

  “Just making sure you know I’m here,” he smiled. “I’m making the most of every minute I have alone with you in person.”

  “Quit or I’ll start the hour now,” I joked.

  “Fine.” He transferred his attention to the radio and searched for something. He settled on the local rock station since my truck did not have satellite radio, and he had left his iPod in his room.

  “I really like your parents,” he said after a while. “They know how to make a person feel at home.”

  I could tell he was reflecting on this morning, and I wasn’t sure where he wanted to take this conversation. So, I listened and kept my attention on the road.

  “I hope I can be like…like your Dad is with your Mom,” he said. “They’re so, easy, so relaxed with each other. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen that before. If I have, I haven’t noticed it. She’s not afraid…of him…you know.”

  “They love each other,” I said. “Why would Mother be afraid of him? She’s his whole world.”

  “My mother said she loved my…father, but she was always scared of him,” he said.

  “I’m sorry,” I said, not really knowing what to say. “I’m certainly not scared of you, if that makes you feel any better.”

  “Aren’t you?” he asked, leaning in a little more. My breath started getting shallow again, and I focused on the road.

  “No, Griffen,” I said. “But you should fear me because I have the power to start counting that hour now – get back on your side!”

  He r
eached over and poked me in the ribs, tickling me.

  “Stop that!”

  He did it again.

  “Griffen!”

  He gently ran his fingers through my hair, and I gave up. That was better than assault and actually relaxing. If he had to touch me, well….

  We finally reached the barn. Since we were early, we were going to have to catch the horses ourselves. I handed him two buckets and put some food in each one. We grabbed two halters and lead ropes and went to the paddock where our horses, Sonny and Shade, waited under a big oak tree. The weather was brisk, not cold, and the blue sky glowed through the leaves.

  The horses knew we came with presents, so they made their way toward us, trotting briskly to ensure they would get treats before the others noticed our approach. Sonny, the buckskin gelding Christopher hunted, would be Griffen’s, and I was riding Shade, a dark bay gelding with a white blaze. They met us eagerly like puppies, and we rewarded them with treats as we placed the halters over their ears.

  Hand in hand, we led them back to the barn. From the looks of things, we were still almost alone, so Griffen leaned over for a quick kiss.

  “We’re going to start that hour now if you don’t behave,” I smiled, and kissed him back.

  “Suits me,” he grinned.

  “Keep walking…we’ve got to tack up. I have a place I want to show you,” I said. “The sooner we get there, the sooner the hour will start!”

  Now he was all business. I gathered the saddles and bridles we were renting and put them outside the stalls. He started tacking up the horses while I retrieved the picnic gear and our helmets from the car.

  “Use this as a saddle pad on Shade,” I said. “And see if the bridle you made me fits him. I want to see what it looks like on a horse.”

  “Yes, ma’am,” he smiled and continued his work.

  “This is part of your Christmas present,” I said, showing him the picnic backpack. “I just took the liberty of filling it up with our lunch supplies today. Hope you don’t mind. I guess it’s not a surprise, really, any more.”

  “Thank you, Elliott,” he said. “This is a perfect way for us to have some time to ourselves – I’m impressed! How do you like your bridle?”

  He brought Shade to me, and I gasped. “Griffen, it’s beautiful! I can’t wait to see it on Viva!”

  “I’m glad you like it,” he said. “This extra rein is actually a lead rope that you can use to tie him when we stop to…eat.” His eyes   sparkled, and I was ready to get there – with him – right now.

  “We’re not there yet,” I said. “Hopefully no one else has the same idea, and we have company.”

  “Not likely,” he said. “But I’ll deal with them if we do.”

  Griffen carried the backpack and swung up easily on Sonny. As always, he and his horse made a magnificent pair. Sonny pranced a little for effect like he knew he was carrying royalty. Shade, too, was ready to go and caught Sonny’s infectious mood. Eager to ride, but also to be alone with Griffen, I decided to gallop the pasture then head to the woodland trail.

  Shade was a delight and responded to my wishes with effortless grace and balance. Sonny, too, was relishing the pace, and both horses lifted us as if with wings to our favorite places. I felt so alive – their energy and strength surging through us – and we floated with them across the pasture and into the woods.

  At the woods’ edge, we slowed to a canter. Gliding along the wide trails, we flew through he trees. The cool air stung our faces and watered our eyes. Being together like this with him was magnificent.

  At the end of the trail, we walked the horses deeper into the woods. The December woods were quite open, and I had no problem finding the little hidden pond. There was a tiny clearing at the edge that made a perfect spot for a picnic. We slid off our horses, tied them to saplings, and removed our helmets and gloves. Griffen untacked Shade so I could get to the blanket while I laid out our picnic.

  I took great pains to make everything look like Scotland from the tartan napkins to silverware, down to the same cheeses – or the best I could find at the Piggly Wiggly. Unfortunately, we were still a long way from lunch, but the picnic looked great.

  “Merry Christmas,” I said waving my hand over the spread and beaming.

  He walked over to me, swept me up in his arms, and kissed me solidly on the lips. The sensation of being lifted completely took me off guard, and I clung to his neck for fear that he would fling me or stumble. He lifted my 100 lbs with ease, and once I realized he was taking me somewhere, I gripped a little tighter. He carried me to a huge pine tree and set me down gently in the soft needles. Being here, alone, with him, like this…able to trust him completely…I knew there was no way I would ever be able to live without this man in my life.

  “Start the clock,” he whispered into my turtleneck as he brushed his lips along my jaw and down my neck.

  “Who’s keeping time?” I said closing my eyes and drinking in his smell – all the smells – pine needles, waxed cotton, horses, him, I wanted to stay here forever by him – held prisoner physically and mentally – I wanted him to hold me here forever.

  “Griffen?” I said, as he laid his head next to mine.

  “This was supposed to be my present to you,” I said. “You’re not playing fair…again.”

  He leaned over to kiss me, and I stopped him. “My turn,” I said, and kissed his neck, his ears, his mouth, and pulled myself as close as I could feeling his perfect muscles tense as he let me kiss him.

  Gently, he pushed me back. “Whoa a minute, Elliott,” he said huskily. “Be still.” He held me tightly in his arms, and I lay motionless next to him, every muscle in my body tense with awareness. He was so warm, so solid, so safe, so mine.

  We lay there together in each other’s arms completely absorbed   in being alone like this. The horses nipped at twigs and jingled their bridles. Birds called in the trees, and something splashed in the little pond in spite of the cold air. I could hear and feel Griffen’s heart beating steadily…solidly…so safe I felt with him…here in his magnificent arms.

  The hour went by, then two. The morning had to come to an end, but we were certainly not going to rush it. I could not get enough of his kisses, hearing him talk, watching him watch me – the time went by all too rapidly. My fears vanished, and I knew I could trust him completely. He knew when to kiss, when to stop, perfectly balancing passion and principles – and I began to relax. Grand never spoke a word in my head all afternoon.

  Back in my driveway, I was thankful to see no neighbors had arrived yet for our dinner party. We had made plans for the upcoming New Year’s weekend, which was only two days away. I was going to meet his family, duck hunt, and fox hunt. Butterflies were already landing in my stomach. Griffen walked me to my door, and it took all the composure I had not to cling to him.

  “See you Friday at noon, then?” he asked.

  “I’ll be counting the hours.”

  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

  Chapter 23 - Panzer

  The horse is God’s gift to mankind. With retrievers He’s just showing off.

  The alarm buzzed at an insanely early hour. It was cold in the room, but I had someone else’s blankets piled over my head keeping me warm. 5:00 am’s red glow pierced the otherwise absolute darkness.

  I sat up, disoriented. Then I remembered. Duck camp. I’m at the Hale’s camp with their rowdy wonderful family, and Griffen’s camp is next door. Along with the Hale family, I had met Griffen’s uncle and cousins and their families, and all their dogs last night and been introduced to a whole new world – the world of the maniacal duck hunter.

  After settling the horses into their weekend paddocks, we ate like royalty, played all kinds of card games (actually, I watched), told stories, and laughed until way past midnight when Mr. Hinton, Griffen’s uncle, forced us to go to bed. The Hale’s had a guest bedroom for me that I was to use for the weekend. It was decorated with pictures of their family in all sorts of outdoor poses displaying t
heir various   conquests in every kind of pose possible. The bedroom had its own bathroom and was not at all what I expected from a hunting camp.

  The weather was rainy and cold, so I pulled on a layer of long underwear beneath my riding pants. Griffen suggested we wear our formal hunting clothes under the duck clothes to ensure that we would make the 10:00 fox hunt on time. William knew his plans and had given us a pass to arrive on time today rather than the customary hour earlier that was expected of staff.

  Riding pants next, then my tall, warm socks. I buttoned my white shirt, wrapped on my stock tie, and covered it all with a dark green turtleneck and a borrowed green wool sweater. I was beginning to feel like a tick and still had my Barbour to go. I fixed my face, tamed my dark hair into a barrette, pocketed some peppermints and colored chap stick, and headed down stairs to wait for Griffen.

  The Hales were deer hunters, so they were not awake yet. I quietly stepped to the mudroom and closed the door behind me trying my best not to wake their labs. Rummaging through the piles of gear Griffen left for me, I collected my hat, a dark silk scarf, and some wool gloves. The waders, however, intimidated me, so I decided to wait for help with them.

  Last night, the whole crew had amused themselves watching me attempt to pull on the neoprene monstrosities, so the thought of trying that alone was out of the question if I didn’t want to wake the dead. Griffen pulled up outside, and I motioned him to come in and help.

  “Good morning, Little Vixen,” he said, and leaned down to give me an oh-so-welcome kiss. We had had very little privacy the evening before, and I was starving for him. Unfortunately for me, however, he was on a mission that must have involved a tight schedule.

  “Let’s get you into these,” he smiled, gently leaning away and helping me step into the boots.

  As I held the wader racks, he pulled the neoprene over my hips and up to my armpits. In spite of his tight time frame he caved when I wriggled under his touch, so he spun me around for another kiss. If I had wanted to collapse, I would not have been able, for the clothes made me stiff as a board. I felt ridiculous, and we burst into a fit of silent giggles.