by Len Webster
As he gazed down at her, Clara stirred in his hold, and her shallow breathing made his insides stir. There was nothing more right in the world than having her in his arms. But then there was a sense of wrongness to have her also. It wasn’t like Clara had a boyfriend and she was cheating on him. It was the thought of his best friend that gave Noel the feeling of how wrong it all was. He promised Alex he wouldn’t touch Clara, but that was before he saw her, got to know her, and then fell in love with her.
Gently, he removed Clara’s arm off his chest and slid his arms from under her. As he stood up from the bed, he looked at her. To think the woman he’d eventually fall in love with, the woman worthy of moving mountains and draining the seas of its water, had been in front of him all this time.
Bending down, he kissed Clara’s head. She held his life and his heart in her hands. He scanned the room until he found his pants lying on the floor towards the edge of the bed. He picked them up, placed both legs through, and buttoned them. He let them hang loosely off his hips. Turning, he saw Clara still asleep before he made his way to the bedroom door. He gently closed her door behind him and walked to the kitchen to make breakfast.
Noel started to take bites out of his apple as he poured the pancake batter into the buttered pan. A faint ringing sound caught his attention. He turned to find Clara’s phone flashing on the dining table. Noel walked over to see Alex’s picture on the screen as it vibrated. Guilt took a swing right in his gut. The contents of his stomach churned and he felt lightheaded. Noel considered letting it ring out, but he knew Alex would either call the apartment or him to find out why Clara wasn’t answering. Picking up Clara’s phone, he answered it.
“Morning, kiddo!” The cheeriness in Alex’s voice was evident.
“Hey, Alex. It’s Noel,” he responded. He gripped the phone tighter to control his anxiety as he walked back into the kitchen to finish Clara’s pancakes.
“Noel? Where’s Clara? She’s okay, yeah?”
“Of course she is. She just left her phone on the dining table. I saw it was you and thought I’d answer it so you wouldn’t go big brother and wonder where she was,” Noel explained quietly.
“Oh, makes sense. Why are you whispering?”
“I, um, Clara’s door is closed. She must still be asleep. I don’t want to wake her.”
“Oh, she’s been telling me about the new recipes she’s been working on. She must be working pretty late, then. Clara was like that when she made those peach tea ones. She takes those recipes seriously. The last time I was in Melbourne, I got to be her guinea pig and those were the best extra pounds I’ve ever put on!” Alex let out a short laugh.
Noel couldn’t take speaking to Alex about Clara, not after the night they shared together. “How’s the Owens account going?" Noel asked, deflecting the topic of Clara.
“I was on the stand on Thursday. Prosecution thinks we have him good for fraud. Don’t see how he’ll walk. Millions in offshore accounts, and he left shareholders bankrupt for investing in his dud projects. Would have gotten away with it if I hadn’t noticed the inconsistencies in his accounts and balances. Mercer’s just happy that the reputation of G&MC is still intact. He’s letting me take my eight-week annual the moment this trial finishes instead of when I was meant to take it with you.”
“Mercer’s a good man. Better to work with than Gregson, but you’re a damn good accountant, Alex. You should have been given the promotion in Boston not me,” Noel said truthfully.
“You’re the one that brought in the ten-million-dollar Billson account. You got the promotion for a reason, Nolan, so stop thinking I deserved it. You worked harder than I did and well, I’m good here in New York. Plus you make a better boss than I would. You know that,” Alex said reassuringly. It wasn’t that Noel didn’t like being a boss. He’d rather be working on accounts than reading reports about them and signing them off for people like Mercer and Gregson. Noel sighed as he placed the cooked pancakes on a plate and looked at his half-eaten apple on the counter.
“Noel, I found a reason to stay. Even if I was offered the Boston job, I would have to refuse it. I can’t leave New York. The only time I’m leaving this place is to see Clara. I’m not like my father. I won’t sacrifice my family, and right now Clara is my family. I’m never going to turn my back on her,” Alex said. Noel understood the underlying message to Alex’s comment.
“She must be one amazing woman to understand your love for Clara.”
“She’s pretty amazing, and she completely understands why I do what I do for my sister. Clara only has me at the end of the day. She doesn’t have our father’s attention or our mother’s love. It’s how it’s always been, and if I don’t protect Clara then I’ll be just like my parents, and Clara never deserved that.” The hurt was clear in Alex’s voice, and that broke Noel’s heart. He wanted to know what happened between Clara and her parents, but Noel knew that was a secret he couldn’t pry open. She had to willingly express it.
“She’s a keeper?” Noel asked curiously.
“Forever worthy, Nolan,” Alex replied, and Noel smiled at Alex’s prospect of forever.
“Well, treat her good. Don’t let her get away like Tori did.”
“I won’t. When you know, you know!” Alex’s voice sounded cheerful, and Noel knew his best friend was happy.
“Then I guess you know.” Noel laughed.
“Don’t be a dick. You’ll know, too. She’ll make you question everything you ever knew about life and love, and even yourself. Don’t think you can just live life from bed to bed because when you least expect it, it will hit you, and it’ll never leave you.” Alex’s words pierced Noel, and he shook his head.
“I’ll let you tell Clara when you get here. I better run,” Noel said. Alex said goodbye before they both hung up. Noel sensed that there was more to the conversation than Alex was letting on.
He took the plate of pancakes and the cupcake from the bench before walking over to Clara’s room. He paused outside of her closed bedroom door for a second, breathed in, and opened it.
All attempts of breathing were futile as Clara sat in the middle of the bed, the blanket wrapped around her body as she looked at the locket, the sun hitting her skin perfectly. What he witnessed made him weak to the knees. Clara’s messy curls cascaded down her blanket-hidden body. There was never another woman as beautiful as she was. Clara looked up and sweetly smiled at him, delivering with it a clench to his heart; she made him unbelievably weak.
“You have no idea how beautiful you are,” Noel breathed out as he approached the bed. Clara frowned at him.
“What?" he asked.
“You’ve never called me beautiful before. I’ve always been ugly and annoying to you,” Clara huffed.
“Clara, there is nothing ugly about you. You are so beyond beautiful that no one has ever come close. Your beauty alone leaves me breathless. While everything else about you makes it difficult to take in air: your laugh and your smile. It’s a struggle to be around you. As for annoying, well, that frown of yours is annoyingly adorable. Now stop that and eat,” he demanded as he placed the plate of pancakes and the cupcake in her hands.
“I made that cupcake,” he announced. The smile on her face told him she was proud of his efforts.
“You did?” Clara took a bite out of the cupcake and her smile deepened once she swallowed.
“It’s really good, Noel. I’m very impressed. Thank you for making it.” The gleam in her eyes had his heart expanding.
“I’m glad you like my first cupcake. It was meant to be dessert last night, but we were…”
“Tangled in the sheets?” Clara offered. Noel closed his eyes and images of them together flashed through his thoughts. When he opened them back up, Clara’s head was titled at him. He sat next to her on the bed. He wanted to correct her and tell her it was more than sex for him, but he left it.
“Clara, how do you feel? I didn’t hurt you, did I? Please be honest with me,” he begged as he ran his han
d through her curls. With it being her first time, he knew she would be sore. She looked up at him and placed the cupcake on the plate.
“No, trust me, you didn’t hurt me. You were gentle and kind. You weren’t rough or demanding, and well, you made me feel cherished last night. I don’t know how to really explain it, but I felt connected to you. When I looked into your eyes, I knew you wouldn’t hurt me. I trusted you with every piece of me, and I don’t regret anything we did last night.” Her eyes never left his.
His heart expanded; it was an ache he had never felt before, telling him that Clara definitely, without a doubt, owned his heart. They sat in silence for a moment as Clara ate her pancakes; she was about to put a forkful in her mouth when she stopped and placed it back on her plate.
“Noel, was it, umm, good for you? You can be honest. I’m a big girl. If it sucked for you, then I completely understand,” Clara said as she looked down and picked at the cupcake.
Noel placed his finger under her chin and brought her up to face him. “You’re joking, right? Clara, last night was incredible. I have never made love to a woman before, and last night was new and mind blowing. I have never felt or experienced what I had with you. Last night wasn’t tangling in the sheets or having sex, it was more than that. That connection you felt, I felt it. You are the best I’ve ever had, Clara; that’s never going to change,” he confessed.
Clara placed both her hands on Noel’s face and brought his lips to hers, not caring about her plate of food. Clara’s lips soft pressed against his, and he never wanted to know another pair. She was an addiction he couldn’t fix. No amount of treatments or any form of rehabilitation could erase her from his system. His life needed her—correction—she was his life.
Noel tasted the blueberry pancakes as his tongue swept the bottom of Clara’s lip. Clara’s approving moan vibrated against him, causing his desires to intensify as he explored the inside of her mouth. Each stroke of her tongue had him groaning, needing more. Their kiss turning frantic like she was his lifeline and he needed to hold on. Clara’s hands were in his hair, deepening their kiss as his heart raced and his breathing heaved. The moment he brought her down and hovered over her, the sound of his phone rang through the bedroom. Noel let out a growl of frustration as Clara laughed at him. Digging his phone out of his pocket, he answered it.
“What?" he yelled into the speaker.
“Where the hell are you?” Rob asked, frustrated. The sound of people talking loudly could be heard in the background.
“I’m at the apartment, why?”
He looked down at Clara, who only continued to caress his face before letting her hands run along his chest. Noel tensed under her distracting touch and watched Clara bite her bottom lip.
Damn! She had to do that!
“You promised to be my partner for the annual charity race. But you said you’d come to PJ’s before the race and help me out with ‘Jewel the runner!’”
“Why can’t you just call her Jewel instead of ‘Jewel the runner’?” Noel asked as Clara raised her eyebrow at him.
“Look, I didn’t spend forever with those lights to get left behind! I’ve got to destroy Petenski this year. Get your ass here now! I need you, Noel!” Distress was clear in his voice. Rob was either desperate to finally beat Petenski, or to finally speak to Jewel. Noel had a feeling that Jewel was the leading factor to his call.
“Fine, I’ll be there!”
He sighed in defeat and hung up. Looking at Clara, there was no anger on her beautiful face, and that made him sigh again. He had planned for them to stay in bed together, to talk.
“'Jewel the runner,’ hey?” Clara teased as she poked his solid chest. He groaned at just the touch of her alone.
“I only have eyes for you, Clara,” he explained.
“But she’s ‘Jewel the runner!’” she emphasised and Noel couldn’t help but plant kisses on her nose, forehead, and cheeks as Clara giggled at his playfulness.
“You know about Jewel?” he questioned once he finished showering her with kisses. Noel brushed the hair out of her face and ran his fingers along her locket.
“Everyone knows about Jewel. But Rob can do so much better. You tell him that when you see him,” Clara said as he moved off her body and sat on the edge of the bed. He wished he’d never made those promises to Rob; he’d much rather stay in bed with Clara.
“You take a shower and go see Rob. I’ll stop by the race a little later,” Clara promised as she placed a kiss on his bare shoulder. Her lips on his body brought back the flashes of last night.
“Next time, Clara, I want that shower with you,” Noel said. He stood up from the bed and faced Clara. He loved the way her cheeks went red. He kissed the top of her head and winked before walking out of Clara’s room and towards his.
Noel looked through the crowd at PJ’s to find Rob sitting on his own with two beers in his hands. PJ’s was busy for ten in the morning, but Noel knew it was a tradition for the row club. The charity row let all rowers race the 10k race at any speed they wanted, but some had their own personal competitions with others, just like Rob. But the real tradition was that they all would have a pint at the nearest pub. He remembered Rob telling him that it was only an excuse for them to drink so early in the morning. Noel weaved through the crowded pub and took the empty stool to Rob’s right.
“You slept with her, didn’t you?” Rob asked forwardly as he handed Noel his pint of Guinness. Rob didn’t look at him. Noel stared at his beer and said nothing. He was glad the pub was crowded and no one could hear what they were be speaking of.
“I’m going to take that as a yes. I should have believed what Max said.”
“What did Max say?” Noel asked as he looked over at Rob.
“Max just told me what I needed to know. We all made a promise that we’d look over Clara for Alex while he was in the States. Didn’t think we’d have to worry about you being interested in Clara. You showed more hate for her than anyone. When I helped you set up the lights for the bakery, I didn’t think I’d be betraying Alex, too.” Rob’s words sent chills down Noel’s spine. He hadn’t thought that he had essentially betrayed Alex. Noel knew he’d hurt Alex and maybe lose him, but betray him? It was a hard pill to swallow.
“He’s not going to be happy with you. He’ll forgive Clara, but once Alex finds out, he won’t forgive you. You shouldn’t have slept with her, Noel. You should have left things uncomplicated. Shit, I probably shouldn’t have encouraged you. What happens when you go back to Boston? You’re going to leave that poor girl heartbroken. She’s a good kid that got dealt some real shit! And you just made it so much worse for her. I’m not real happy about helping you deflower one of my best friend’s little sisters. Yeah… I knew Clara was a virgin; you could see the innocence in her. However, you are also my best friend, and I’m going to stand by you. But I need to know how you feel about her. I need to know that I’m betraying Alex for a good reason.” Rob turned and looked at him.
“Boston, my career, my apartment, and all my possessions mean nothing to me. Not when she’s here, Rob. I’m in love with Clara. That cupcake-loving brunette changed me, and she’s worth what I have to go through with Alex. I didn’t mean to betray him, but it happened, and I’m not sorry for it. I tried to stay away, but I couldn’t fight it anymore. I love Clara, and all I want to do is make her happy,” Noel said with complete honesty. He knew it’d be easier to convince Rob of his love for Clara than Alex. They still had a few weeks together to work it out.
“Then you better be there for her if Alex should ever disown her. He’s done everything to protect her and provide for her. Get ready to face some serious backlash, Noel. But you don’t have to worry about me telling Alex. I said I’d protect her, but Clara has to live her own life; I would never go revealing all her secrets to him.” Rob drained the rest of his beer then placed the empty glass on the dark oak pub counter.
“Do you have any idea how early in the morning it is? You must know. Why am I here?
” Stevie whined as she placed a Gloria Jean’s takeout cup in Clara's hands. “Got you an English Breakfast tea because only old nannas are up this early.” Clara stepped aside and welcomed Stevie into her apartment.
“It’s ten in the morning, Stevie,” Clara stated. Noel had informed her of her brother’s call, and it unnerved her. However, he assured her that Alex didn't know, and that somewhat calmed her nerves.
“Uni’s finished for the year! I didn’t even get up this early to attend my marketing lectures, so you, my friend, are lucky that I’m here. Now where is Saint Annie?”
“Not here.”
“I see that. The only time you’d ever not invite Annie to be with us is if we both hate Annie’s guts. Which I find hard to believe since you like her, so that can’t be it. It must have to do with se—” Stevie paused.
Clara bit her lip in anxiousness.
“I think I need to sit down,” Stevie said before she turned and made her way to the couch, mindlessly sitting down on it. Stevie looked like she was a world away. After Noel left, Clara realised the extent of what had happened. She needed to talk to someone, and Stevie was her answer. Clara breathed out and sat in the armchair next to Stevie. For someone who just woke up, Stevie was unbelievably flawless. She wore little makeup and her blonde hair was straight as paper, blessed with such natural beauty. Clara, however, had to shower out her tangled curls to get them under control.
“You really did have sex with Noel?” Stevie asked, looking up at her.
“Um, well, yes. I did,” Clara said with a hesitant smile. She wasn’t sure what Stevie would think of her for “putting out” on the first date.
I am not a virgin anymore. I really did have sex with Noel last night.