Sean's Reckoning

by Sherryl Woods

  As soon as Kevin was out of the room, Ruby frowned at her. “Okay, you want to tell me what’s going on?”

  “Nothing. I’m fine. Really.”

  “And I’m first lady of the United States,” Ruby retorted in a tone heavily laced with sarcasm.

  “Okay, it’s Sean,” Deanna admitted reluctantly. “He just took off. One minute he was there watching me with that worried frown on his face. The next he was gone.” She noticed that Ruby didn’t even try to deny that there was anything odd about Sean’s behavior. Evidently she’d noticed it, too. “Did you see him go? Was he upset?”

  “A woman he cares about keeled over while serving spaghetti, what do you think? Of course he was upset,” Ruby retorted impatiently. “When he walked into Joey’s and spotted you on the floor, I thought he was going to pass out right beside you.”

  Deanna recalled the gentle, coaxing tone in his voice as he’d tried to draw her back to consciousness. She also recalled something else, the quick glimpse of a totally bleak expression on his face when she was holding Kevin. Then she’d been concentrating on reassuring her son, and by the time she looked Sean’s way again, he’d gone.

  She was still puzzling over that memory when the doorbell rang.

  “Eat your dinner while I get the door,” Ruby said. “Unless it’s a tall, handsome man, I’m sending whoever it is away.” She regarded Deanna with a stern expression and added, “As for you, drink the juice when Kevin brings it.”

  “Yes, ma’am,” Deanna said with a salute that mocked her drill sergeant manner.

  After Ruby had gone, she toyed with the now totally unappetizing eggs, then sighed. She couldn’t seem to shake the feeling that something just wasn’t right about the way Sean had disappeared.

  “That’s no way to get back on your feet,” a disapproving voice chided her.

  Deanna’s gaze shot to the doorway, where Sean stood regarding her uneasily.

  “I’m not hungry.”

  “Isn’t that how you landed in bed in the first place?” He crossed the room, took a look at the plate of cold, congealed eggs and dry toast, and made a face. “Give it to me.”

  She held tight to the tray. “Why?”

  He rolled his eyes. “Do you have to argue about everything?”

  “Pretty much. Otherwise, people tend to steamroll right over me.”

  “This could be one instance when you should let them,” he said, gently disengaging her fingers and taking the tray. “I’ll be right back.”

  She stared after him, more confused than ever. He didn’t seem angry or even upset, just a little sad.

  It was twenty minutes before he returned, carrying the same tray with a plate of steaming French toast with a dusting of sugar and cinnamon. He set the tray across her knees, then stood scowling down at her.

  “Now, there are two ways we can do this,” he said. “You can eat that like the intelligent woman we both know you are.”

  Deanna had to fight to hide a smile. “Or?”

  He grinned, looking surprisingly eager for her to test him. “Or I feed it to you.”

  “I’d like to see you try,” she muttered, but she picked up the fork and began to eat. After a couple of bites she stared at him in surprise. “This is really good. You made it?”

  “With my own two hands,” he acknowledged. “When you live on your own, you learn a thing or two about cooking or you live on frozen dinners. And at the station, we all have to take a turn at kitchen duty. Believe me, none of us are slackers. Hungry men take no prisoners.”

  She grinned at the image. “What else can you cook?”

  “Give me a cookbook, and I’ll try anything.”

  “You’re going to make some lucky woman a wonderful husband.” She’d expected the teasing remark to draw a smile, but instead, that bleak expression darkened his eyes again before he turned away to stare out the window.

  “Sean?”

  “Yeah?” He turned back slowly.

  “Thanks for coming to Joey’s tonight. I know it wasn’t your call.”

  “No big deal.”

  “It was a big deal to me,” she insisted. “I heard you.”

  He turned to face her. “What?”

  “When I was still pretty much out of it, I heard your voice. I think it pulled me back to reality.”

  He shrugged, looking uncomfortable. “You said something like that at the time.” A smile tugged at his lips. “You said that was why you wouldn’t open your eyes, ’cause you didn’t want to have to face me when I said I told you so.”

  She vaguely remembered saying that. “But you didn’t say it, did you?”

  “Nope. I figured you’d gotten the message anyway.”

  “Why did you take off without saying anything?”

  “You were in good hands. You didn’t need me around anymore,”

  Deanna heard the casually spoken words, but she was also almost certain that she heard something more, something that sounded an awful lot like pain.

  “Sean?”

  “Look, I’ve got to get out of here,” he said abruptly. “I shouldn’t have left the station, but I wanted to check on you.” He bent down and brushed a quick kiss across her forehead. “Finish every bite of that food. If you don’t, I’ll hear about it.”

  “You’ve got Ruby tattling on me again?”

  He grinned. “Ruby and Kevin. You’re not going to get anything past me.”

  There was something oddly comforting about that, Deanna thought as she finished her meal and slowly drifted off to sleep. Not that she’d ever tell him that.

  Something had changed between them, Sean concluded on his way back to the station. He couldn’t quite put his finger on it, but he’d left Ruby’s with the sense that he and Deanna had a new understanding. He wasn’t sure yet whether that was a good thing. He wasn’t crazy about the distinct possibility that she was starting to see through his defenses.

  Nor was he nuts about this need he had to check up on her, to reassure himself that she was all right. Hadn’t he learned anything from that moment at Joey’s when he’d been an outsider looking onto the tight-knit world of Deanna and Kevin? Apparently not, because just a couple of hours later, he hadn’t been able to stop himself from going back for more.

  As it had turned out, he’d been right to go. Deanna evidently hadn’t learned a thing from that fainting episode. She hadn’t touched the food that Ruby had fixed for her. The woman needed a keeper.

  Was he prepared to be that? An image of Kevin flashed through his head. If ever a boy needed a dad, it was Kevin. But he deserved one who was going to be around for the long haul. Sean wasn’t convinced that he was that guy. Maybe if it were just Deanna and him, he could take that leap of faith his brother had talked about when he’d married Maggie, but not with a kid involved, a kid who didn’t deserve to be let down if things didn’t work out.

  Sean sighed heavily. Things were getting too damned complicated. He was almost relieved when a call came in not ten minutes after he got back to the station. He dragged on his gear and headed out, eager for the distraction, eager to be doing something he knew he was good at.

  Of course, a fire could be just as unpredictable as a woman, no question about that. What should have been a quick run turned into an all-nighter with two more companies involved. A fire that had started on a kitchen stove spread to nearby curtains before the old lady living there realized anything was amiss. She’d run screaming from the apartment rather than calling 911, which gave the fire a few extra minutes to blaze out of control in the old wooden structure.

  “What the hell happened?” Hank muttered when they arrived to find flames shooting from several windows on the third floor. “I thought somebody’s dinner caught on fire.”

  Sean latched on to one of the residents. “Is everybody out of the building?”

  The man was clearly shaken. “I’m not sure. I just moved in last week. Second floor.”

  “How many apartments are there altogether?” Sean asked.
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  “Six, two on each floor.”

  “Okay, your apartment’s accounted for.”

  “And Mrs. McGinty, it started in her place,” he said. “She’s right over there. And that’s her third-floor neighbor with her.”

  “That leaves us with three more apartments we don’t know about,” Sean said, looking at Hank. “One on the second floor, two on the first.”

  He saw their lieutenant trying to get similar information from the weeping old lady and her neighbor. “What do we have, Jack?” he hollered as he hauled hoses toward the front of the building where the flames were beginning to shoot through the roof.

  “Everyone’s accounted for except an old man who lived on the second floor. He’s hard of hearing. Neighbors tried beating on the door on their way down, but they couldn’t wait. It was too hot.”

  “I’m on it,” Sean said at once.

  “You can’t go in there,” Jack protested. “The third floor’s engulfed. It could cave in any second. You’d be trapped.”

  “I’m not leaving the man in there to die,” Sean said, not waiting for permission before scrambling over equipment to head inside.

  The heat came at him in waves, accompanied by thick smoke that blurred his vision and made him choke.

  “Dammit, Sean, are you crazy?” Hank said, on his heels.

  “It’s one flight of steps. I can make it,” he insisted, dropping down to feel his way up the stairs. “You go back.”

  “No way. I’m not living with guilt for the rest of my life if something happens to you while I’m standing around in the fresh air twiddling my thumbs. Now, stop arguing and move. Let’s get in and out while we still can.”

  When Sean reached the second-floor landing, the smoke was so thick he couldn’t see his hand in front of his face. He heard the crackling of flames just over head and the sizzle of the water trying to douse them.

  “Come on, guys. Five minutes. Ten, tops. That’s all I need,” he muttered to himself. Thank God there were only two apartments. The door to the one on the right was ajar. More than likely that was the one the man outside had fled. That meant the old man was probably trapped in the apartment on the left.

  He crawled across the landing, reached up and twisted the doorknob. The metal was hot to the touch, but not unbearable. No flames inside the apartment, not yet, anyway. Unfortunately, though, the door was locked.

  Sean muttered a curse. “Hank, we’re going to have to knock it down.”

  “Stand back. I’ll do it. You be ready to go inside. On the count of three. Ready?”

  “Ready.” Sean stood up as Hank counted rapidly, then slammed his foot into the door just below the lock. It shattered on its hinges and he was inside, shouting, feeling his way through the thick smoke, coughing despite the gear meant to protect them from smoke inhalation.

  He found the old man in the bedroom, next to the window. He’d passed out before he could get it open to call for help. Sean scooped him up and was about to turn around and head back the way he’d come, when wood splintered overhead and flaming beams crashed down around him, blocking his intended route of escape.

  “Hank?” he shouted.

  “I’m okay, but we’re not going out the easy way. Open the window. I’m right behind you.”

  Despite the confidence of Hank’s words, Sean knew his partner better than anyone on earth. He heard the faint hitch in his voice that no one else would have been able to discern.

  “Dammit, Hank, what’s wrong? Now’s no time to lie to me!”

  “Just get out of here,” Hank shouted back.

  He wasn’t nearly as close as Sean would have liked. He put the old man down long enough to get the window open. In seconds there was a ladder against the side of the building, and he was able to hand the victim to one of the other firefighters. Still there was no sign of Hank.

  Sean looked back through the flames, wincing at the sting of smoke that blurred his vision. Hank was on the far side of the burning beam, on the floor, not moving. Sean had to fight against the wave of panic that crawled up his spine. He was not leaving Hank in here to die, and that was that.

  He met the gaze of the firefighter at the top of the ladder. “I’m going back for Hank.”

  “Dammit, Devaney, there’s no time.”

  “I want you out of there now,” the lieutenant shouted up at him.

  “No way in hell am I leaving Hank in here.” He glanced at the firefighter at the top of the ladder. “Move it. Buy me some time. Two minutes. That’s all I need.”

  The man seemed about to argue, but then he was moving, shouting at the firefighters down below. Water began to splatter down through the destroyed roof. Flames sizzled and sputtered, but didn’t die. The smoke grew even thicker and more acrid, the way a doused campfire did just before it died out.

  Sean dodged another falling beam engulfed with flames to reach Hank’s side. He didn’t waste time on questions about his friend’s injuries. Hell, he wasn’t even sure if Hank was conscious. Sean just picked Hank up as if he weighed nothing and pushed his way back toward the window, oblivious to the heat, just totally focused on getting his partner to safety.

  He handed Hank’s limp body through the window to another waiting firefighter, then crawled out behind them. On the top rung, he ripped off his gear and sucked in a lungful of fresh air, coughed, then gasped for more.

  Not until he was on solid ground again did the rush of adrenaline fade. He barely made it to where the paramedics were working on Hank before collapsing.

  “He going to be okay?” Sean demanded, his voice hoarse.

  “Looks as if he might have broken an ankle,” Cal Watkins replied. “Smoke inhalation, too, but he’ll make it.” He looked over at Sean. “What about you?”

  “I’m fine,” Sean insisted.

  Cal frowned at him. “Yeah, you sound fine, like you’ve been smoking for about a hundred years and have no lung capacity left.” He slapped an oxygen mask over Sean’s face, then peered at him more intently. “A couple of minor burns on that handsome face, too. Don’t worry, though, they’ll just give you a little character. You can hitch a ride to the hospital in the same ambulance with Hank.”

  Sean hadn’t even felt the burns. Now, though, with the adrenaline wearing off and relief coursing through him that Hank was going to be okay, he was beginning to feel the pain. It wasn’t the knock-you-on-your-butt pain some of the other guys had described after burn injuries, but it was bad enough to keep him from arguing about the ride to the hospital. Besides, one glance at his lieutenant’s fierce expression told him he’d be better off in the emergency room than facing the storm that was brewing over his decision to go into that burning structure not just once, but twice, in direct defiance of orders.

  Thanks to plenty of repeat visits to various fallen firefighters, Sean had a passing acquaintance with most of the burn specialists at the hospital. It was the first time, though, that he’d been on the receiving end of their attention. They were like a bunch of mother hens. He kept explaining that he could go home, but before he knew it he was upstairs in a room with a grumbling Hank in the bed next to his and a male nurse who looked like a linebacker for the New England Patriots stationed at the door.

  He tried the phone, but calls were blocked. He turned to the nurse. “I don’t suppose you could get this phone turned on, could you?” he asked. He really needed to call Ryan in case word leaked out about his injuries. He debated a call to Deanna, but decided it could wait until after daybreak. She needed her sleep.

  “I’ll have a phone hooked up in here in the morning,” the nurse said.

  Sean tried his best smile. “It’s almost morning now. What difference will a couple of hours make?”

  “The orders are on your chart. No calls. No visitors till morning. You both need some rest.”

  “What about the old man we pulled out of that building? How’s he doing?”

  The nurse shrugged. “Haven’t heard.”

  “Couldn’t you find out?
” he coaxed. “After all, we risked our lives to save him. I’d sleep better knowing he’s going to be okay.”

  The man scowled, but finally relented. “I’ll check. You stay put.”

  As soon as he was gone, Sean slid out of bed, cursing the indignity of the hospital gown that was flapping around him. He made it as far as the door, opened it and peeked out, when a familiar scent caught his attention. He looked up straight into Deanna’s worried face. Ruby was right on her heels.

  “Going somewhere?” Deanna inquired lightly.

  “Looking for a phone that works,” he admitted, surprised by how glad he was to see her.

  “Not to call me, though, right? It wouldn’t occur to you that Ruby and I might hear about the fire and panic.”

  He frowned at her tone. She was clearly angry. “It’s not morning yet. The local news isn’t on, and I doubt this fire was big enough to make CNN.”

  “Actually, your boss called because Hank asked him to,” Ruby said. “He also tried to let Ryan know you were here.”

  Sean didn’t even try to hide his shock. “The lieutenant called you and my brother?”

  “That’s the one,” Deanna said. “Nice man. Seems to understand the importance of keeping friends and family informed.”

  “Of course, the staff has kept us cooling our heels out here in the hall,” Ruby complained. “But now that you’ve tried to make a break for it, I figure we can come inside and prevent any more attempted escapes. Out of my way, handsome. I need to see for myself that Hank’s in one piece.”

  She pushed past Sean and left him standing there to face a still-indignant Deanna.

  “I would have let you know what happened,” he swore. “You weren’t in great shape yourself last night. I didn’t want to worry you.”

  “Nice try, but I’m not buying it. Who were you about to call? And don’t try to pretend it was me.”

  “Ryan, actually.”

  She nodded. “Good choice. Give me the number. I’ll try him again. I’ll tell him to come by in a couple of hours after you’ve had some sleep.”

  For a woman who’d collapsed herself not twelve hours earlier, she sounded amazingly strong. And she didn’t seem inclined to take no for an answer. Sean didn’t know quite what to make of this new, take-charge woman who was facing him down. This woman didn’t look as if she needed anyone to rescue her. She looked more like an avenging angel herself.