Off Limits

by Jules Barnard

  I’m not a virgin, but I’m loyal, and despite what Jaeger might think of me after I let Drake drive me home, I don’t sleep around. Make out, for sure, but not sex. That I reserve for relationships. It’s my one prim and proper rule, if you can call it that.

  Gen opens the screen door. “There you are. Hey, Jaeger. I didn’t know you were coming over.” She looks at the lounge chair I’m sitting on and the bent legs. “You eat too much tonight, Cali?”

  “Shut up!” I toss a pine cone at her head, but she’s farther away than Jaeger and my aim is not exactly accurate. Gen doesn’t bother deflecting because the pine cone lands wide. Okay, it lands in the next county.

  Jaeger shakes his head and stands, holding the warm hibachi by the handles, the paper bag stuffed under his arm. “We’re going to need to work on that.”

  “I thought you said I’m never to throw anything ever again.”

  “And did you listen?”

  Shit. He has me there.

  Jaeger walks to the back gate. “Later, Gen. Cali, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  Tomorrow?

  “Eleven a.m.,” he calls from the driveway.

  I trust what Jaeger said about him and Gen, so if he isn’t hooking up with her, what is going on? There’s something Gen isn’t telling me.

  Chapter Seventeen

  The next morning, Gen growls. “Friggin’ hell.” She spilled about a thousand Cheerios onto the kitchen floor.

  A few roll out of the kitchen and I kick them back inside. “Better clean that up.”

  She squints across the counter, her eyes half-lidded, a lock of hair sticking straight up on one side. “Why are you up? You’re jobless. Shouldn’t you be sleeping until two or three, or job-hunting?”

  I deserved that. “Touché. Jaeger told me to be ready at eleven, remember?”

  She grumbles a response. Something about noisy roommates and waking too early.

  Oopsie, I might have made a little noise in my eagerness to get ready for my date.

  The coffee maker pours a stream of deliciousness into the pot. It’s almost done, but… screw it. Gen’s grumpiness is in top form and requires evasive action.

  I pull out the carafe—it’s one of those auto-stop ones—and pour her a cup. “Here.”

  She takes a sip, dustpan in hand. “Ahhh, gracias.”

  My cell phone rings. I grab my purse from the counter and toss everything out until I locate my phone at the very bottom.

  “Hey, sis.”

  “Tyler?” This is weird. He must be back in Boulder, but I don’t usually hear from him for a few weeks after a visit. “What are you up to?”

  “Still out and about,” he says.

  “What does that mean?”

  “Well—um—I’m hanging with Mom.”

  Tyler visits in the summertime, but never for more than a couple of weeks.

  “Did you lose your job?” I say in a panicked rush. Great. Friggin’ great. Both Morgan kids can’t screw up their futures. It’ll crush Mom.

  “Relax. I didn’t lose my job. Just needed a break from Boulder.”

  Tyler loves Boulder. “Okaaay. What’s your plan?”

  “Well, I was thinking I could come back out there for a bit. I’m bored in Carson. Mom’s new place is nice, but it’s too flat here. Nothing to do. My buddy in the Keys wants to show me new bike trails. I could crash with him, but he’s got a girlfriend, and… you know.”

  “Crowded.”

  “Right, so what do you think? Can I camp in your loft? I’ll stay out of your hair. Promise.”

  “Stay for as long as you like. You don’t have to pretend to be invisible. I like having you around—but don’t tell anyone I said that.”

  He laughs. “Your secret is safe with me. But you might change your tune if I see any guys sniffing around your place. I’m still your big brother.”

  And he’s friends with Jaeger. That could get complicated. What would Tyler think of us, and whatever it is we’re doing? “I’m twenty-one, Tyler. You can lock the big brother protective crap away. I’m not a virgin.”

  He lets out a deep breath. “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that. And you can tell Gen I’ve got my eye out for her too. Any guys entering the abode will have to pass the Tyler Detector.”

  “This should be fun,” I say flatly.

  “I knew you’d agree.”

  Jaeger picks me up right on time and he cometh bearing gifts.

  “How did you know I like lattes?”

  He smiles from the driver’s seat. “Green olives I deduced. The latte was a lucky guess.”

  “You have good taste.”

  This time I get the full effect of his gaze. “Yes, I do.”

  My face grows warm and I peer out the window, hiding the flush I know is there. Being strawberry blond doesn’t exempt me from everything that comes with being a redhead. But at least I narrowly missed freckles.

  “So what are we doing?” We’ve passed Stateline. Wherever we’re going it isn’t in town.

  “I’m taking you to my house. I’d like to show you what I do.”

  We talked a little about ourselves last night, but showing is always better. I have a good idea of what he does for a living—I’ve seen the woodcarvings by local artisans littering the side of Highway 89 my entire life—but if he wants to show me, I’m game.

  A few minutes later, Jaeger pulls into a long gravel driveway, tall pines towering majestically along the sides. A clearing at the end opens to a house next to a square building with a similar pitched roof. Beyond the two structures, the lake peeks through more pines. Most people with this real estate would have clear-cut and widened the view of the lake, but the owner has kept it fairly natural.

  It’s a nice house. Really nice. I didn’t think Jaeger lived with his parents, but I figured he rented an apartment like Mason. How much does a bear and totem pole carver actually make?

  Jaeger steps out of the truck and walks around the front, closing the passenger door behind me. “Let’s take a look inside first. I’ve got lunch ready.” He moves toward the house.

  What is happening? Lattes and green olives, the home-delivered meals—that’s all A-game material.

  Is he wooing me?

  My memories of early dating rituals are hazy. Eric didn’t make much of an effort in that department. Both Gen and Jaeger have denied there’s anything between them, so that’s no longer a barrier. Jaeger is Tyler’s friend, and I will for sure receive shit for that, but I can deal with my brother. Eric and I are history, and I’ve mostly recovered from being dumped. By all accounts, I should be jumping all over Jaeger with my normal abandon, yet something still holds me back.

  I don’t want Jaeger to be a rebound, that’s true, and I worry about it some, but not as much as before. Jaeger’s different. We’re different. If I allow it, I think this could be something serious. But life is confusing right now. I don’t know what I want to do about school, but I also don’t want to mess up what’s between me and Jaeger. Because I like it. I like it a lot.

  Jaeger walks up the steps to a small covered porch with logs for support beams and a wide stone chimney with a built-in outdoor grill. Picture windows off the porch face the lake. He unlocks the door and we step inside the house.

  It’s not what I expected.

  The exterior was spectacular, but anyone can rent a place that looks good from the outside. The interior and what you do with it is something else entirely, especially when it comes to men.

  There isn’t a hint of guy-shabby chic anywhere inside Jaeger’s place, not even your token crooked wall hanging. A modern, comfortable-looking sable sectional faces the hearth, a massive TV to the side of the fireplace. The art around the room is the real deal, colorful, but masculine to match the decor. There’s a dining table like the trestle table inside Jaeger’s parents’ house, only this one is carved with Mission-style accents.

  Jaeger strides past the kitchen island and opens a stainless steel refrigerator. “Can I get you
anything to drink?”

  My mouth is parched, but not from thirst. Nerves are getting to me. Who is this person with the beautiful home, wooing me like I’ve never been wooed before? And am I ready for him?

  He’s everything I never knew I wanted.

  I thought I was self-confident to a fault, and that was how I ended up with Eric. We fell into a committed relationship, because I persisted and determined we would. I was at the top of my class, destined for a great career. A guy’s not sure? You charm him into being sure. I made it easy for Eric to be with me. I didn’t complain about him going out with his friends. Didn’t ask why he never introduced me to his family. He didn’t have to work for us. I made it happen.

  But this thing with Jaeger is different. We’re on equal ground emotionally and intellectually, and it makes me nervous. What have I to offer? I have no job, an uncertain future… it was all fun and games when I thought I had a leg up professionally, but I’m beginning to wonder about his totem pole business.

  “Just water, thanks.”

  Jaeger hands me a glass and pulls out a blue ceramic bowl from the refrigerator, containing a fluffy green salad with sliced strawberries on top. A plate of raw meat joins the salad on the counter.

  He turns on a grill in the cooktop and spreads out slices of meat. “Make yourself comfortable,” he says over his shoulder. “This will take about ten minutes. We’ll eat, and then I’ll show you around.”

  I glance at his immaculate home. It makes the cottage Gen and I live in look like a shanty. “Do you mind if I go outside? I’d like to take a look at the lake.” And gulp in air.

  Jaeger gazes at me, his expression approving. “That’s why I picked this place. For the view.” He smiles and wipes his hands on a dishtowel, his shoulders tense. I wonder if he’s nervous too. “I’ll come get you when it’s ready.”

  I walk to the edge of the yard and the familiar scent of pines fills my lungs, grounding me. I pass the workshop, curious about it—really curious—but I don’t peek inside.

  A log swing with plush cushions faces the lake above the stony shore. I take a seat and tuck my legs beneath me, clenching my hands together.

  Being with Jaeger is easy. I don’t have to strategize to get him to want to spend time with me. He makes it happen. I’ve never had anything I didn’t have to work for. School was easier for me than for most people, but I still put in time and energy. This thing with Jaeger is natural, and it scares the shit out of me.

  I’m not sure how much time has passed when the swing moves of its own volition. I glance up, and Jaeger slides in beside me, placing his hand lightly on my ankle. We gaze at the lake together without talking. I’ve never felt this kind of calm and peace with another person.

  He leans close, his chin above my shoulder, nose nuzzling the lobe of my ear. “What do you think?”

  I gather he’s talking about the view and not his hand on my leg, which is very distracting. “I love it.”

  He shifts and lifts me onto his lap, his arms a protective enclosure. “I want you to be happy here.”

  I tense. This is so much. He’s so much. I have nothing to offer.

  His brow furrows as though he senses my thoughts. He kisses my cheek and then my mouth, his hands running up and down my arms in a soothing manner. I lean into him, my body going slack. Tingles spread from my core as he deepens the kiss. I wrap my arms around his neck, running my fingers through his short, soft hair.

  Jaeger breaks the kiss first, but he doesn’t pull away, he holds me close. His pulse pounds against my lips at his throat. “We’d better go in or I’ll want to stay here for a while. Our lunch will go bad.” He lifts my chin and pecks my lips. “To be continued,” he says with a knowing look, and leads me into the house, his hand wrapped around mine.

  The tri-tip salad is delicious. The guy seriously knows how to cook, while I’ve been keeping the frozen meal section of the grocery store in business. We finish our food with a glass of red wine, and he gives me the tour of the house.

  I’ve already seen the great room, which includes the dining area, kitchen, and living room. Down the hall, the master bedroom faces the lake, while on the other end of the house sits a second bedroom and a large office that holds a couch, a pinball machine, and another massive TV. In other words, a man-cave.

  The man-cave is more in line with what I expected from the home of a twenty-four-year-old. Medals and a few trophies are piled haphazardly in a glass case, along with other odd guy curios, like signed baseballs—and a pair of boxers with a woman’s lipstick mark.

  “Nice boxers.”

  “Oh—yeahhh… That’s from a while ago.”

  “Yours, I assume?”

  He nods, a sheepish smile crossing his face.

  “But someone else’s lipstick, I hope?”

  Jaeger grabs my hand and pulls me to his chest. “One of the random celebs that came through town.”

  I frown, imagining the female vacationers looking for hookups, and spotting Jaeger. No one could pass him up.

  He kisses my mouth, my lips stiff and unyielding. “I’m not proud of some of the choices I’ve made in the past, but that’s all behind me now,” he says.

  What choices? And what does that mean? This entire date feels serious, like he’s trying to tell me something.

  “Come on. I’ll show you my woodshop.”

  Jaeger pulls me out a back door, across stone pavers, and into a huge, open indoor space filled with machinery and some type of ductwork sprouting from a table in the center. There’s a comfortable-looking leather couch to the side, and a couple of doors at the back of the building.

  He points to the doors. “One of those is a bathroom, the other a drying room with fans.”

  In the corner of his shop stands an eight-foot carved winding trellis. “That’s really pretty.” It’s bigger than anything I imagined him working on, and far more beautiful.

  “Wedding arbor I’m making for a client’s daughter.” He presses gently on the curve of my lower back and guides me forward. “I’ve done cabinetry and other extras, but my bread and butter is over here.”

  Tiered slats built into the lower half of one of the walls are filled with dozens of square and rectangular flat wooden etchings in every size. Next to them, a display shelf with a square black velvet drape hangs from the wall. Jaeger pulls out one of the smaller etchings, about two feet by two feet, and places it on the shelf.

  I stare for a long moment without saying anything, because my throat is tight and I’m not sure words will come out. I’ve seen art in museums and from local artisans—there’s a boatload of shops in town. But I’ve never seen anything like the carving in front of me.

  At first glance, three deer graze in various poses, as if the artist pulled them from a photograph. Upon closer inspection, the grain of the wood is worked into the design, though the only actual carving is of the deer and not their surroundings. The etching isn’t cheesy or cheap. It’s beautiful. Elegant. Nature carved on nature, and I can’t stop staring.

  “Well? What do you think?”

  “I—wow. It’s nothing like what I imagined. It’s real art.” That sounds lame, but it’s the truth, I’m sorry to admit.

  He chuckles and replaces the piece in its slot. “You thought less?”

  “I thought you made totem poles and sold them on the side of the road.”

  He shakes his head. “Cali, so little faith?”

  “Well, how was I supposed to know you did this?” I wave my arms wildly. “I don’t know anyone with this kind of talent.”

  He picks me up and kisses my lips. “You think I’m talented?”

  My toes are a good two feet off the ground. I’d be stupid to argue with him in such a vulnerable position. I twist my mouth. “You know you’re talented.”

  He laughs again and whispers his lips across the sensitive skin at my neck. “I like to hear it coming from you.”

  His mouth on my neck sends a shiver down my arms. I look into his eyes. “Yo
ur work’s beautiful, Jaeger.”

  An hour later, after Jaeger shows me several of his designs, holding my hand and stealing kisses throughout, he drops me off at the cottage with one last hot kiss on the doorstep and the promise of something special tomorrow.

  I walk into our outdated, oversized closet of a rental, my head spinning. So this is what the expression swept off your feet means. I am floating, and without Jaeger to keep me grounded, I feel like I could drift away. What happened to my substance?

  I’m still hovering in the living room when Tyler walks in a few seconds later. He dumps his duffel loudly in the same place as last time—the center of the pathway. He stares out the front window. “What are you doing with Jaeg?”

  I sink onto the couch. “We’re hanging out.”

  His mouth parts and his eyes narrow. “What do you mean, hanging out?”

  “Dating, seeing each other—you know that ritual men and women do?”

  Tyler steps closer. Here it comes, the you-can’t-date-my-friend speech. “Cali, I get it that you’re going through a rough time. I know the feeling.”

  He does? He doesn’t know I lost my job. He must be referring to the breakup, but what does Tyler know about breakups? He hasn’t had a girlfriend since high school.

  “Which is why,” he adds, “I want you to stay away from Jaeger. He’s a good guy. He doesn’t deserve to get fucked over on the rebound. He put up with enough shit from women in his past.”

  I stare, dumbfounded. There it was again, that allusion to Jaeger’s past, which Jaeger said was behind him but that I’m getting the impression had left its mark. “Are you warning Jaeger away from me? What happened to the Tyler Detector and keeping guys away from your innocent sister? And for the record, I am a nice girl.”

  Tyler sits next to me on the couch, the weight of his large body making me bounce on my end of the cushion. “You are, but like I said, you’re”—he flaps his hand—“messed up. Unstable right now.”

  I shake my head in exasperation. “Thanks, Tyler, ’cause I needed my brother to turn on me in my time of need.”