More than Scars

by Brocious, Sarah

  “The house. I came over to see the girls…and was hoping you too…friend. Instead I find you have high tailed it out for the day and you never even called to see if I wanted to grab coffee or anything! I am hurt! I thought friends did that sort of thing!”

  My laugh couldn’t be helped. “I didn’t high tail it out. It was a sudden decision and I went to see my Mom and brother. I just went clothes shopping, which I have heard men are not exactly fond of and now I am starving! Besides…no dating.”

  “I am your friend,” he growled.

  “Ian.”

  “Nerissa,” he mimicked my tone.

  “What is everyone doing?” I asked softly.

  “Well, the two piano geniuses have been playing all day. Amelia is painting her little heart out…the little one has talent…and me? I may be starving right now. Do you know anyone who might be heading to lunch?”

  The music had stopped in the background and I wondered if Ian’s conversation had been detected.

  “I will make a deal with you,” I agreed.

  “Anything!”

  “If I let you come to lunch with me, no more covering. You have to tell me the rest of the story! You have to tell me what everyone is covering up Ian. I am tired of all the surprises. I love this family…yes, love! And I need to know why it ticks so I can take care of all of you thoroughly! Do I make myself clear?”

  “You love me?”

  I laughed. “Stop being such a boy!”

  “You will let me pay for your lunch?”

  “Even better…I will let your brother pay for our lunch!”

  His laugh was so sweet and so happy it made me smile even bigger.

  “I think I can agree to those terms. It’s a date?”

  “No date! I made a promise to Liam…and he can hear you now can’t he? You are playing with him…Ian Byrne…you be kind!”

  “Nerissa you are making me blush.”

  “Ian!”

  “You can’t talk to a man like that and expect him to be on his best behavior when he sees you!”

  “I swear…I will call this deal off if you do not behave,” I laughed, my cheeks were flames.

  “I’m sorry,” he laughed. “Okay, okay…no, please, I’m done with the teasing. We will lunch as friends and I will be the one watching my tongue.” He chuckled into the phone. “My brother is throwing daggers with his eyes anyway…if I don’t amend my motives I will not be leaving this house!” He gave a short laugh. “Oh come on Liam…I am only playing no need to get all jealous! It is just lunch! Nerissa text me the address…I will see you soon, friend!” He ended the call.

  My tummy was dancing. Liam Byrne jealous over lunch with me? Now that just made my Sunday!

  Ian showed up at the little restaurant a half hour later, looking very dapper. He wore a blue sweater under his coat, which did all kinds of crazy to his blue eyes. He also greeted with a warm hug…it comforted. I hadn’t realized how much I needed comfort from someone who truly understood the situation.

  We were seated quickly and looked over the menus.

  “So...it was a screaming night,” he said softly, when the waitress took our orders.

  “I’ve never heard a child so terrified,” I agreed. “I never want to see it on Brianne again.”

  Ian shook his head. “The night I found them…she was curled in a ball in the bush. We couldn’t get her to speak for days afterward. When she finally did make a sound it was when she woke up one night in the middle of a dream. Liam was still in the hospital. I was staying at the mansion for the girls. I was helping prepare for Jade’s funeral in my brothers place. It scared the hell out of me. It took me hours to quiet her. All she wanted was Liam. She needed to see him! I dressed her up and took her to the hospital. They made up a bed for her in his room…and she slept like the dead.”

  Tears pricked my eyes. “Last night, he sang to her. She calmed…fell asleep as he sang.”

  He smiled sadly. “He’s been trying to calm her that way, make her fall asleep in bed now…he use to just let her sleep in his room, but she has to grow up.”

  I nodded.

  “She dropped off eventually, the poor thing.”

  Ian smiled. “I heard you and Liam had a moment together.”

  I blushed. “Excuse me?”

  He chuckled. “We are brothers Nerissa. We share a lot. He is worried he crossed a line and you will be angry with him.”

  I could feel the warmth flow through me now at the memory. “I am not angry with him,” I said softly.

  “I told him you wouldn’t be,” he sighed. “I told him you are the type, you would have punched him in the throat if his actions had been unwanted…employer or not!” His blue eyes twinkled.

  “True,” I agreed.

  “Would you have let him kiss you?”

  Again my cheeks flamed.

  “That’s what I thought,” he said with a smile. “Attraction is a funny thing, isn’t it? You have never looked my brother in the eye, but you are drawn to him. He doesn’t get it. He doesn’t want to admit that the draw is there because it is so unbelievably ridiculous to him that a pretty sweet girl like yourself with all the options in the world would choose him.”

  I took a sip from my water to wet my throat.

  “I can help you convince him Nerissa! He has had so many things happen to him to make him believe people are going to turn on him…but you aren’t one of those people.”

  I laughed and shook my head at him. “What are you saying?”

  “I want to set you up with my brother!”

  The water I was sipping went down the wrong pipe and I was choking on it now. “What?” I sputtered. “Ian be serious!”

  “I am…I love my brother…I love my nieces…you are good for both!”

  I reached over and touched his hand. “You are sweet Ian, but I don’t need set up.” My heart hammered. The idea of being with Liam was attractive, but silly. I wasn’t even allowed to look at him for goodness sake!

  He sighed. “You are so good Nerissa! It should have been you that caught him first…not Jade.”

  “Don’t speak ill of the dead Ian,” I whispered.

  “She was cheating on him,” he bit out.

  I gasped. “No…why?”

  Ian rolled his eyes in disgust. “She said Liam loved the children more.”

  I shook my head, not understanding.

  “I told you she pulled away from the children…she didn’t want to be a Mom…Liam loved being a Dad. He invested in them. He made up for the time she did not spend with them. She grew jealous of the little ones. She wanted all of his attention. When he didn’t give her everything, she went looking elsewhere for it. He has all these issues with trusting that people really care about him…and it stems from this. Add the scars on top and you have one hell of a complex.”

  Who could do that to Liam? To Brianne? To little Amelia?

  “Did Liam know?”

  Ian nodded. “He found out and it almost broke him. He forgave her though and took her back. He loved her…unconditionally. They were actually just trying to work things out before the murder. He should have just let her go…she was never going to change.”

  My mind was still trying to wrap around the idea of cheating on Liam. “Did she keep cheating?”

  His blue eyes were troubled. “Yeah, she did. Up to the day before she died. I never told Liam that I knew that. She planned on leaving him. She had told me that morning. She apparently hadn’t told her lover though. It looked all reconciliation on the outside. It looked really convincing. She should have told her lover her real plans.”

  My adrenaline went up a level. “What do you mean?”

  Ian’s eyes darkened and his face grew stormy. “The one that attacked Liam…killed Jade? It was the lover.”

  I shook my head. “That’s horrible.”

  “That’s the truth Nerissa.”

  I shook my head. “Poor Liam.”

  He smiled gently. “Now do you see why he needs
your love so much? He needs healing Nerissa…and you are just the girl for the job!”

  My cheeks warmed. “No set ups Ian.”

  He grinned. “No promises, friend.”

  Chapter 11 A Ride

  Arms full, I juggled to punch in the code to the servant’s door and pushed through. The warmth of the kitchen hit my cooled cheeks. “I’m back Mary,” I called as I bustled in. Only I was not greeted by Mary.

  “Rissa!”

  I was crushed by a pair of tiny arms. My bags fell to the ground and I lifted Brianne into my arms. She clung to my neck as though her life depended on it. My heart thudded with concern.

  “What are you doing in the kitchen?” I laughed, and looked to the counter where Amelia sat perched with a cup of hot-chocolate.

  “You came back!” Brianne nearly sobbed.

  My heart sunk. She had truly thought I left? In the weeks I had been here though…even on my free days, I had remained here. The poor girl! “Of course I did,” I said softly. “Don’t you remember our talk this morning?”

  Her blue eyes blinked tears and I wiped them.

  “Bri wanted to wait here for you…she knew you would be coming in this way.”

  I knew the voice at the first syllable. He was off to the side, near the kitchen entrance. My heart stumbled but I kept my eyes on the little one in my arms.

  “I wanted to make sure you came home okay,” she insisted. “I want you to be safe always!”

  “I was perfectly safe,” I assured her. “First, I went to my Mom’s house and Al was there! And then I went to the store…safe…and had lunch with your Uncle Ian…again safe! We went to a movie!”

  “Did you have popcorn?” Amelia almost fell off her stool with excitement.

  My eyes turned to her and I nodded. “Yes…and now I am home…safe and sound! No worries.”

  Brianne studied my face. “You could have come home and watched a movie here…even safer.”

  “I just needed some grown up time,” I explained.

  “Daddy is a grown up and he never leaves here.”

  “Sometimes,” Amelia argued. “He’s gone on the plane before…but only for a day. Uncle Ian stayed the night that night!”

  “Enough, girls,” Liam said softly. “Let her settle in. You’ve said hello, now let her take her coat off.”

  I set Brianne down. I undid the belt of my coat, my eyes lowered, but I let them roam in his direction…and my they traveled until they found his form starting at the tips of his black boots peeking from beneath dark jeans. I followed the very long line of his legs, pausing only to admire the fit, to the edge of a soft grey sweater that also fit him very well, it hugged toned arms, and even tugged a bit at the shoulders…he had very broad shoulders. It must be very hard to find clothes that fit a body like his just right. I mean…the sweater did lovely things for those shoulders…or rather the shoulders did a lovely thing for that sweater. And, I was staring. Why hadn’t I admired this morning when his back was to me and he couldn’t see my face turn crimson? Oh yes…I was entranced by his music making magic! Damn you Liam Byrne.

  “Are you okay Miss Meadows?” His voice was rough and lovely.

  I closed my mouth, swallowed, and turned to gather up my scattered bags.

  “Let Stewart take those up.”

  “I-I will be going up anyway,” I stuttered.

  He was moving toward me…I felt him. I literally felt him get closer. His hands at my shoulders tugged gently at my coat. “Take this off and have some hot-chocolate with the girls. I was hoping you could make them a bit to eat? I need to make a call…and then…” he paused and took the coat down my arms gently. “We were going to go on the hay ride.” He brushed past me and set my coat on a hook beside the door, giving me a lovely view from the back. I closed my eyes. Temptation was strong around this one.

  “Miss Meadows?”

  I opened them up, confused for a moment, and then realized I looked silly standing there with my eyes closed. I focused on his chest, wishing for a tie to alter my view. My thoughts were that he was wishing for a tie too because he was reaching for one to straighten and it was not there. He ended up just brushing the front of his sweater.

  “Did you still want to go with us?”

  I filled in the blanks for him. What he wanted to say was…Do you still want to go with me after what happened last night?

  “Yes, of course!” I swallowed.

  He sighed with obvious relief. “I will make that call and then be at the stables later on. We will leave after sun down.”

  I smiled. “Should be fun! I will get the girls dressed warmly.”

  “Take care that you don’t forget about yourself,” he said softly. “You need to stay warm too.”

  Oh, I was plenty warm at the moment!

  “Listen to Nerissa,” he whispered as he gave the girls a kiss and then left the room quickly.

  My heart went double time at my name on his lips.

  “Your cheeks are pink,” Amelia giggled.

  “I was out in the cold,” I explained, blushing deeper to be found out by a child.

  Stewart entered then and went for my bags. He gave me a smile.

  “So much for avoidance,” I mumbled to him.

  He chuckled. “Mr. Ian has a lot of influence over his brother. He may be the less matured younger brother…but he is plenty smart and plenty caring!”

  I smiled. He certainly was! And I was only too proud to call him my friend!

  It was dusk when the children and I walked out to the stables. I figured we would have time to say hello to our favorites before we set off. Liam was not there yet. I made straight for Zosimo. I should have been paying homage to Baxter, who would more than likely end up being my ride when I so chose later this week, but I couldn’t resist. The black beauty called to me.

  I rubbed his beautiful face and ears and listened to his soft mutterings before giving him his carrot. “One day…you and I are going to escape this stable,” I promised. I peeked over to see Amelia offering her gift to Cocoa Princess. The gelding took the carrot gently. Brianne stood watching me timidly and with a bit of awe.

  “You like Zosimo?”

  “He’s the most beautiful horse here!” She smiled at him.

  I remembered what Liam said about Zosimo recognizing a survivor and though it was worth a test.

  “Come here,” I whispered to her. “I will watch him. You don’t have to fear.”

  Jack got a little edgy and stepped forward…to which, Zosimo stamped a great hoof. I held up my hand.

  “Brianne, come here,” I said in a gentle voice. I held my hand to her and she came without fear. Zosimo did not even flinch. I removed my hand from him and he grew agitated and nervous. I quickly laid my hand on his neck and whispered to him. “Touch him,” I insisted to her.

  She hesitated.

  “He will not hurt you with me here,” I promised her.

  She reached out a small hand and touched his glossy fur.

  Zosimo trembled, but at my soft words, he remained still and allowed the little girls touch. “She needs this,” I told him gently. The horse murmured in his throat but stood still, not a muscle flinching. “Good boy,” I praised and then smiled down at Brianne. “See? He’s as gentle as a lamb!”

  Brianne was holding her breath as she stroked him. “He’s so pretty!” Once she got her fill, she stepped back, smiling up at me. I patted Zosimo, telling him again that he was a good boy. He tossed his head a bit, seeming well pleased.

  Jack breathed a sigh of relief, and I patted his shoulder, as I passed him to kneel before Brianne. Amelia came to join into our little powwow. She gave Zosimo a curious glance.

  “Don’t ever do that without me,” I pleaded with them.

  “It’s okay,” Amelia spoke up, shaking her head. “I like Cocoa Princess better. He doesn’t growl like Zos does.”

  I smiled at Brianne. “How was that?”

  “It was awesome Rissa!”

  I gave her a q
uick hug. “Go see if your Daddy is coming!”

  My heart felt like it was overflowing at the sparkle in Brianne’s eyes. After last night she needed something special. I turned to Zosimo and hugged the horse’s great neck. ”You gorgeous beast!” He almost sounded like he was purring, as I scratched him between his eyes and then he gave out a sudden and a familiar whinny. I knew what it meant. Liam had arrived!. I lowered my gaze and moved to give a quick offering to Baxter. The sweet natured horse accepted his gift and the well-meant pats. He would remember my scent and the gifts for next time!

  Brianne was at his heels and crowing about the recent event. “Rissa kept me safe Daddy,” Brianne laughed. “And Zosimo has the softest silkiest fur ever! But I can’t pet him without her”

  “And you will listen to her? You don’t go near him unless she says?”

  “Oh yes Daddy!”

  “Go on out to the wagon,” he commanded softly, ushering her toward me. He couldn’t resist saying hello to his Zosimo either.

  “After I say goodbye to Cocoa Princess!”

  I smiled to myself as I made my way outside to the wagon. I hefted Amelia up into the softness of the blankets and the hay. I was glad I had put her in thermals when the cold breeze blew through. I turned to Brianne as she exited the stable and swung her up beside her sister.

  “You ready?” I asked them, watching their excited faces. I went to step up myself, when my waist was grasped firmly and I was lifted without effort over the side. I didn’t even have time to react or gasp. I didn’t have to ask who’s strong arms had placed me here. Jack was already at the helm.

  Liam Byrne was climbing in right behind me, and if I wasn’t mistaken, he was chuckling at the fact that I was flustered.

  “Daddy is so strong,” Amelia sang.

  I blushed. “Indeed he is,” I played along with her hero worship.

  He settled himself at the back of the wagon, where the end was higher and made for a good back rest. He was wearing a hoodie under his jacket and pulled his hood on now against the cold and also for further coverage. It was substantially dark, so not necessary, but it made him feel more comfortable.

  I glanced his way, also feeling more comfortable that he was hiding behind the hood. All I could make out was a pair of smiling lips. Lips I had observed last night for a moment in the moonlight. Lips that had been dangerously close to touching mine. They had touched me…I knew their softness…their firmness as they brushed my cheek. They would feel lovely against mine. I drew in a breath now, focused now on that thought. The mouth tilted further at the corners and I knew he read my thoughts.