The Perception

by Adriana Locke

  I wiped a hand down my face, unsure as to how in the hell we got to this point. I never looked at Sam like that and I sure as shit didn’t lead her on to believe I did. What the hell?

  “Sam, I’m sorry if you think–”

  “You’re sorry? You’re sorry that you leave me every time I need you? Well thanks a lot, asshole.”

  Her insinuation started to piss me off. “I would give anything to take back what happened to you that night. I’ve bent over backwards ever since to make sure that nothing happened to you again. But I’ll be damned if you are going to somehow try to think you have some say in my life! It’s none of your business.”

  “It is my business! I love you!” As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she realized her mistake. She covered her mouth with her hand and let out a small shriek. “Max, I . . .”

  Did she really just say that?

  She looked like she was going to get sick.

  Yeah, she just said that.

  “I had no idea.” I took off my hat, pretty much speechless. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings, but I wasn’t about to let her get between me and Kari, either. “Had I known, I would’ve done things differently. But I love Kari, Sam.” I turned to look at her, the sadness on her face making me nervous. I hated knowing I was the one that caused her pain.

  Again.

  I tried to change tactics. “You’re like my little sister. I just . . . I could never see you like that.”

  “You can. I know you can! Just give me a chance. Please!” She raced forward towards me, but I kept her at arm’s length. Her eyes were wide, pleading with me to listen to her. “Give me six weeks. You’ve never given me a chance to show you who I am, what I can be to you. I’m always there for you when you need me. Look at how much I’m helping at work! Look at who came and got you when Kari left you! Me! I deserve a fair shot, don’t I? It’s the least you can do for me and it won’t cost you anything, besides saving yourself from making a mistake.”

  She took a step forward and ran her hands down my chest. I wrapped my hands around her wrists and removed them from my body, wincing. “No, Sam. There’s nothing between us to give a chance. I’m sorry.”

  “Fuck you,” she seethed, her demeanor turning on a dime. “Everyone thinks you’re this gentleman, this amazing guy and really, all you care about is yourself!”

  “I hate that you think that, but it isn’t going to change anything.” I turned towards the door. “I’m leaving now.”

  “But . . .” I heard her behind me as I walked to the door. “Max! You can’t leave! This isn’t over!”

  I grabbed the handle and opened the door, turning to look at her briefly. “It’s over Sam.”

  KARI

  I woke up lazily the next morning in a guest room at Cane’s cabin in Payson. We had arrived late, snuggled on the couch, and watched movies in front of the fireplace. I wasn’t even sure how I got into bed.

  Cane’s cabin wasn’t the “cabin” I had expected. I expected a mountain cabin with four walls and a bear skin on the wall, a wood-burning stove that you had to heat water up on. But it was anything but that.

  It was a beautiful, 2-story structure with three bedrooms. It had everything you could want but not a thing more and it was perfect. If I was Jada, even with Alexander House, I’d want to live here. The smell of the pine when you walked outside, the fresh air, the sound of the frogs in the pond out back—it was perfect.

  There was a large, wrap-around porch and I could imagine sitting out there with some of Max’s tea, watching a dog chase a ball or a lightening bug. I was more than a little surprised at how much I loved the place, being a city girl and all.

  Max had taken me to a late dinner at a little bar and grill downtown. It was a hole-in-the-wall and I never would’ve known it even existed if he hadn’t walked me through the wooden door. He said that he and Cane always ate there—it was tradition.

  We spent the night cuddling and talking and making love—just finding our mojo again. Just being away from everyone and everything was amazing; I hadn’t even realized how much I’d needed it. Max had gotten annoyed with his phone and turned it completely off, sticking it in the glove compartment of his truck. It had been going off over and over again and I knew it was really frustrating him. He wouldn’t say what it was, only that it didn’t matter and he wasn’t dealing with it.

  We lay on the couch, my cheek pressed into his chest, and watched the Discovery Channel. It always made me laugh when he watched shows like that. When I first met him, I saw total man candy. I still saw man candy, felt man candy as I ran my fingers down his chest, but I also saw something else. The intelligence. The spirit that wanted to make other people better. The man that wanted to figure out how everything worked.

  Max ran his fingers through the length of my hair and I closed my eyes and just enjoyed the feeling of him touching me. A part of me kept looking for something to worry about, something to push him away about . . . but there was nothing. He knew my secrets and had come back to me when I had given him the chance to walk away. For once in my life, there was nothing to be scared of. Nothing to fight against. Nothing to worry about.

  The peace that settled over my soul was bliss. It was something I never thought I’d find, something I hadn’t even bothered to go looking for, really.

  “Wanna go fishin’?” Max asked out of nowhere.

  “Really?” I wasn’t sure I heard him right.

  Me? Fishing?

  “Yeah. Have you ever been?”

  I snorted. “Um, no. I’m a city girl. We don’t fish.”

  “Aw, hell. You have to fish, Kar. Come on.” He moved me off of him and onto my feet, standing up himself. “Meet me at the pond.”

  “You weren’t kidding?”

  “Sweetheart,” he said, amused, “fishin’ is no joking matter.” He headed to the garage, leaving me standing there, watching the door shut behind him.

  I had no idea what I was getting myself into. The closest to fishing I’d ever gotten was the little goldfish named Pepper I’d won at a fair before my mom died. It had jumped out of the bowl onto the kitchen floor and our dog had eaten it. Talk about traumatic. Now Max wanted me to stab a little worm in the gut and throw it out in a pond of water to be eaten alive?

  Maybe I’ll just watch.

  I slipped on my shoes and a hoodie and stepped outside. I stood on the deck, the view of the hills beyond Cane’s property was breathtaking. The air was still, cool, and absolutely quiet. You could smell the pine and a wood stove burning somewhere. It was everything Phoenix was not and while I never imagined I’d like the country, I really liked it here in the woods.

  I walked to the lake below, my sneakers pressing into the soft grass. I could hear frogs jumping into the water as I approached, crickets chirping my arrival. I gazed out across the water, reveling in the fact at being able to be present. My mind wasn’t wandering like usual, I didn’t have a sick feeling in my stomach. I felt whole. At peace. Right where I was supposed to be.

  I felt it for the first time ever.

  I turned at the sound of a tackle box jangling behind me. Max walked down the hill, the rip in the knee of his jeans and his tight blue shirt making me shiver.

  So gorgeous.

  His hat was on backwards and a pair of dirty rubber boots were on his feet.

  “Ready for this?” he asked, setting everything down. He attached a green spinning piece onto the end of one line and handed it to me.

  “Um, we’re using an ornament instead of a worm?”

  Max tossed his head back and laughed. “It’s called a lure and yes, we are. Go ahead and cast out.”

  I held the pole in my hand and just looked at him. “And I do that how?”

  “For heaven’s sake,” he grumbled with a smile on his lips. He stood behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, grabbing the pole.

  “We could just go back inside,” I said, half kidding.

  He ignored me. “You just draw it back like thi
s, pull it forward and press this button,” he said, doing it for me. “That’s all there is to it. Now you wait for something to bite or you can reel it in and toss it out again. Up to you.”

  He left me standing there and got his own pole ready. His muscles rippled through his shirt, his skin peeking from under the hemline as he reached and bent. I sat down in the cool grass and watched the show.

  Max cast his line in the water a few yards away from mine. The moon began to peek through the clouds, the light making my man look even sexier.

  He cast his line out again, looking completely content.

  “I don’t think anything’s gonna bite,” I said, starting to reel mine in.

  “That’s not the point,” he said, laughing softly.

  “Getting a fish to bite isn’t the point? What am I missing?”

  “Fishing is an art. You can sit here forever and not get a bite. But unless you’re feeding your family on it, it doesn’t matter.”

  I looked at him like he was crazy. “Okay. So the point is to waste time?”

  “No, sweetheart. The point is to let the water and the air and the quiet take you away. Fishing is something you can do alone if you need to clear your head. You can do it with a buddy or your dad if you want to bond. It’s a tradition, I guess.”

  I reeled my line in and cast it out again. “So we’re bonding?”

  He smirked. “This is one of my favorite ways to bond.”

  “Huh. I’d have thought your favorite way to bond included more, you know, bonding. Contact. That kind of thing.” I let my gaze fall to the bulge in his jeans and looked back up again.

  “You better stop looking at me like that, sweetheart,” he warned.

  “Or what?”

  He chuckled and shook his head, reeling in his line a little faster.

  “Where’s the closest neighbor?” I asked with as much innocence as I could feign.

  “Mr. Hickman lives a few hundred yards that way,” he nodded his head. “And there’s nobody, really, that way.”

  I stood up and brought my line in and sat the pole down.

  Max watched me curiously, reeling his line in, too. He chewed his bottom lip, probably to keep from smiling, and placed his pole on the ground beside him.

  He sat down on the grass and leaned back, his hands behind him. “What ‘cha thinking, Ms. Stanley?”

  “Oh,” I said, pretending to consider his question as I walked over to him. “I’m thinking you’re right.” I drew the sweatshirt off over my head and tossed it beside Max’s pole. “We do need to bond.” I unzipped my jeans, my eyes locking with his, as I slowly pushed my pants down my legs. I stepped out of my sneakers and my jeans and stood before him in my bra and panties. I gave myself a split second to panic, to realize I was standing practically naked in the middle of a backyard, neighbors or not, but it never came. All I could feel was Max’s adoring eyes.

  “Is that so?” he asked, not moving a muscle besides the corners of his mouth.

  “Mm hmm,” I replied, straddling his still fully-clothed body. I palmed the back of his head with one hand and drew his mouth to mine. He opened his mouth and allowed my tongue access and it took the opportunity. I melded our mouths together, licking and sucking his tongue gently, hearing him growl into my mouth.

  I pulled back, looked at him, and grinned. I could see his control wavering. “You ready to go inside?”

  “Not happening, sweetheart.” He moved me off to the side and I sat on my knees and watched him move. He slipped his jeans off his long, lean body, taking his boxers with them. He lay back on the grass, his erection long and hard. He stroked it with his hand. “Is this what you want?”

  Before he could react or give me direction, I bent forward and drew his dick into my mouth. I sucked the top, swirling my tongue around the head, and then took it as far down my throat as I could.

  Max growled louder this time as I passed my lips over the velvety length. I sucked the tip again, before licking the length, drawing my tongue slowly up each inch of him. He hissed in a breath and grabbed at the blades of grass on either side of him. Watching and hearing him react to me was such a turn-on.

  I took him in my mouth again, wrapping my hand around the base of his cock and squeezing it just a touch tighter than necessary. He bent his knees and lifted his pelvis and I knew he was craving contact. I stroked him base to tip, my mouth following it, my tongue never stopping.

  He dropped his hips quickly, pulling at my shoulders. “Stop, Kar. I’m gonna come if you don’t quit.”

  “I want you to,” I said, dipping my head again.

  “Not like that. Not tonight.”

  I turned to face him and saw the soft side of Max that was responsible for making me fall in love before I knew it. It was the look in his eye he had when he was trying to fix a problem I had. The look that reassured me that he wouldn’t hurt me. The look he had right before he fell asleep at night and his eyelids were all heavy and his heartbeat was rhythmic.

  He grabbed my arm and guided me over him. I bent down and kissed him tenderly while his thumbs found the hem of my lace panties. He slipped them over my hips and I wiggled my way out of them. Without thinking another thought, I let him guide me over his erection, one knee on each side of him, and felt every blessed inch work its way into my body.

  I pressed my hands on his shoulders and let myself get accustomed to his size. Max brushed a strand of hair out of my eyes and smiled. Something was different this time, some unspoken thing that made it seem almost like the first time, but in a less animalistic way. Maybe it was the air. Maybe it was the fact that we were in the middle of a backyard. Maybe it was the moonlight. Whatever it was, it was welcome.

  I began working myself up and down, swiveling my hips at the bottom for the friction that I loved. I closed my eyes as we found our rhythm, his large, calloused hands finding my breasts. He squeezed them, the tenderness in such contrast to the hardness of his skin making my senses go into over drive. I picked up the pace, bouncing up and down. He worked his hips, meeting me stroke for orgasmic stroke.

  I tossed my head back towards the sky, the cool air making my nipples go hard. Max rolled one between his fingers, his other hand finding my clit. It was too much.

  “Max . . .” I warned, sucking in a breath, preparing myself for the sensory burst that was coming.

  He grabbed my hips and dug his fingers into my skin, his eyes squeezing shut. I felt the building of my orgasm coming fast and hard. The feeling of his cock hitting the back of my body, the roughness of his fingertips, and the coolness of the air all added up quickly.

  “Kari, if you don’t stop, it’s gonna be over for me,” he said through clenched teeth.

  “It’s okay,” I said through staggered breaths, letting myself fall over the edge. “Max!” I sat down hard, rolling my hips, his size preventing much movement, but every flicker sent yet another spike to my climax, another hit to my high.

  He squeezed his hands into my hips, his cock painting the walls of my body with its own orgasm. He groaned roughly, his voice as jagged as my own breath. As my body began to calm, the colors fading and my muscles calming, I laid forward onto his chest.

  He stroked my back and I nuzzled into him, his touch coupled with the temperature sending chills down my back. “We better get you inside,” he whispered, kissing my forehead.

  “I don’t wanna move,” I said, my voice devoid of energy.

  “I know, babe. But we can’t lay out here all night.”

  I listened to the wind whirl around the trees, the crickets singing their happy tune, and regardless of what Max said, I could’ve stayed out there all night.

  I could’ve stayed out there forever.

  MAX

  Kari came out of the bedroom wrapped up in a big green robe. The color of it made her eyes look like gemstones, all sparkly and clear. The trip to Payson had done exactly what I wanted it to—it made her relax. It cut through the shit that drove her crazy, it took away all the triggers
that made her think for whatever reason that things would go south between us.

  It showed her that she and I were right together.

  While she took a long bubble bath to warm back up, I jumped in the shower in Cane’s bedroom. I dressed quickly in a pair of black athletic pants and a white t-shirt. Not what I had planned, but I was panicking a little.

  How am I gonna convince her when she says no? How am I gonna make her see that this is gonna happen?

  I had grabbed the two boxes out of my suitcase and tucked them behind the boxes of Fruity Pebbles Cane had in the pantry. I lit a couple of candles and sat them on the edge of the fireplace, along with some wine in my new 180 red plastic cups. I was standing at the fireplace, trying to convince myself not to blow my plan to smithereens. I tried to talk myself out of grabbing her and just getting to the point.

  She deserves more than that. Calm the fuck down. This will work out.

  Dear God, please let this work out.

  She took in the scene around her as she walked towards me, a grin on her face. Her hair was wet and brushed back off her face and she didn’t have a spec of makeup on.

  “You’re so damn beautiful,” I said, holding her face in my hands. I stroked her cheeks with my thumbs, the smoothness of her skin gliding beneath mine.

  “Have you looked in the mirror lately?” She stood on her tiptoes and kissed me sweetly on the lips. “I love it here. If I was Jada, I’d have Cane just move here.” She turned and sat on the sofa. I picked up a cup and handed it to her. “In a red cup. Why am I not surprised?” she giggled.

  “Cane doesn’t have any wine glasses up here. I wish it were in a real glass-”

  “No, you don’t,” she laughed.

  I shrugged and took a sip, the pink liquid tasting overly sweet. “How do you feel?”

  She leaned her head against the cushion, a look of contentment on her face. “I feel great. Relaxed.” She raised her head and smiled at me. “Happy.”