Beautiful Life

by Bruce Thomas

  22

  The day went by quickly. My classes were mostly empty and the teachers were just as tired as the students. It being close to the end of the semester made everything more stressful along with the thoughts in my head.

  Fred hasn't gotten a hold of me. I shouldn't be surprised, but I am. I know I was nothing special to him but I at least thought he would swing by the apartment this week to see that I got home okay instead of being kidnapped out of his own apartment. That was a stupid thought, I know, but I was becoming crazy.

  I felt dirty. I felt used. I felt stupid for putting myself in this sort of situation. I felt like an idiot because he didn't even tell me to do it, I did it myself. And what made me sick to my stomach was that I wanted to do it again. I wanted to hear him gasp my name and pull my hair like he did a few days ago.

  I walked quickly up the steps to my dorm, just wanting to eat a sandwich and take a nap. I was mentally and physically drained from school work and my brain working in overload.

  When I opened the door I stopped dead in my tracks at the sight of two males sitting with their backs to me on the couch. Beside them was Janet and on the floor was Bruce and Anne rummaging through the tv stand for what looked to be a movie to watch.

  "Hey girl!" Janet greeted getting up from the couch and prancing over to me. At the sound of her introduction, all heads turned in my direction. But one pair of eyes stuck out to me more than the others.

  I smiled the fakest smile I could muster up and turned to head down the hall towards my room. My backpack felt a thousand times more heavy on my shoulder then it did minutes prior but then again that certain pair of eyes added most of the weight on me. Janet followed me to my room and stood in the doorway while I unpacked my things. I tried my hardest to not rudely ignore her but I was trying to play it cool seeing Fred after the last time I saw him was in a more intimate situation.

  "I hope you don't mind the gang hanging here. They will be gone before late, I promise," Janet explained nicely. "I know you had a busy week but everyone's leaving for the week later today." I smiled lightly at her, now giving her my full attention instead of acting like I was occupying myself with my books. She was such a nice person knowing that I was stressed out and I'm sure she received the vibe from me the last couple of days that I wasn't in my best mood.

  "It's not a problem, Becs," I assured her. I was used to Elmer popping in whenever he felt like it now that he and my roommate were officially together. And I loved it when Anne came over because she was so quirky and sweet, it was hard not to like her around.

  "I figured you would want to look over your notes and stuff even though we're off for a week but just know you are welcomed to join us. Anne and Bruce are fighting over Legally Blonde or Kung Fu Panda," she laughed shaking her black sleeked head.

  I assured her I would come out when I was ready for a break from studying but I knew I wouldn't. She smiled and saluted two fingers before shutting my door, leaving me be.

  My stomach growled from missing lunch

  because of my class schedule and the fact that the number one person that I didn't want to see at this point in time was sitting out there inches from the fridge.

  Before I could even talk up the courage of walking out there and grab something real fast just to make it back in here without being seen, the sound of my doorknob twisted.

  No other than the person I was avoiding slinked his way through my bedroom door. His eyes flashed to mine as I sat bent over my books and scribbling into my notebook.

  "Why aren't you joining everyone out there for the movie?" Fred asked turning back around after clicking the door shut silently. It was strange that I didn't feel speechless or anything. It was like my mind knew all along that he would find a way to see me. I wasn't sure if that was crazy to think.

  "What are you doing?" I asked ignoring his question. "Aren't you at all concerned that they are going to know you are in here?"

  Not only did he care about people knowing that him and I were sort of fooling around but I cared too. I knew what people would think of me if they found out that I was just another one of Fred Montgomery's play toys.

  "I told them I was going to the bathroom," he said shrugging his shoulders and stepping closer to the bed.

  I sat my pencil down and watched him wearily as he sat down beside me on the bed. He reached over and looked down at my textbook.

  "Aw the human body. I know it well." His words sent an instant blush to my face that he wickedly grinned at. I could feel my blood pounding in my ears in sync with my heartbeat.

  "What

  are you doing in here, Fred?" I asked again. My mind was reeling with thoughts of what the people outside were thinking of him spending so much time in the room across the hall where he claimed to be. His eyes snapped up from my textbook to meet mine. He angled his body towards me and shrugged his shoulders.

  "Just wanting to see for myself if you were avoiding me or not."

  Oh he was good. But then again he read me like an open book which he commented on before just minutes after meeting me. I picked up my pencil and turned my attention back to my studies. "Well, I'm not so you can go back to the living room before they start to wonder what's wrong with you. Might want to sneak across the hall and flush the toilet to make your excuse more authentic." I scribbled down a few more words in my notes before my notebook was flung across my room.

  "Hey!" I cried out watching it hit the wall and land feet from me on my bed.

  Fred grabbed my wrists and pinned me down to the bed. His body hovered over mine and he peered down at me with amusement in his eyes.

  "Shhh," he shushed me, brushing his lips lightly over mine. "Do you want them to hear you?" I was stunned underneath him. Completely lost for words at what was happening. His warm breath fanned across my face as he watched my reaction to him, pressing his hips firmer against mine. I gasped when he did so. A low groan vibrated from Fred's chest.

  "I thought I would return the favor," he said, his voice low, sending shivers throughout my body. "Since you left my place before I could do so the

  other night. Which, by the way, not cool." I swallowed hard at the memory. "I thought I should give you a taste of you own medicine. You know, for all the girls you have done that too." Including me.

  "Are you really talking about other women I have banged while I'm on top of you, Raine?" He scoffed grinding his hips down harder against me. I whimpered at the contact and this received another growl from Fred. "You're kinkier than I thought you'd be."

  Just to shut him up and so he wouldn't see the red tinge on my cheeks from him forwardly twisting my words, I pulled his lips to mine, hooking my hand behind his neck and forcing him down to me. I pulled back quickly disconnecting his mouth from mine though. We shouldn't be doing this with our friends just mere feet away from us on the other side of the wall.

  I started to slide my way out from underneath him but his hand placed on my hip stopped me. "Let me do this for you," he grounded out, his eyes flicking back and forth between the both of mine. I didn't have to ask what this was to know what he was talking about. He was returning the favor after all. Did he come into my room just to do this? Of course he did, he's Fred.

  "They will hear us," I whispered harshly back at him. My body had started to hum at just the thought of his mouth on me. I would be lying to myself if I said I wasn't curious.

  "Then I guess you'll have to be quiet, now, won't you." A wicked smile pulled up his lips and he slid his body down me and off the bed. Falling helplessly against my pillow, I closed my eyes to get my

  barrings. This was not happening...

  "Scoot down to the edge of the bed, Anna," Fred commanding, alreading kneeling at the end of the bed.

  I seemed to have blacked out as I moved my body to the very edge of the bed in front of Fred. My blood was running through my veins with the anticipation of getting caught and the fact that I was doing this with Fred in the first place. I could tell him no but I didn't want to
.

  Fred stood back up and gripped the waistband of the black leggings that I was wearing and smirked down at me, fingers digging into my flesh as he did so.

  "Wipe that smirk off your face Montgomery," I snapped.

  This only made the smile spread further across his sharp jaw. He looked like he hasn't shaved in a day or two and the extra scruff on his jawline made him look older and much, much, sexier. "You remember that name baby because in a couple seconds you won't remember anyone else's." He was so sure of himself and the observation made my stomach clench and unclench in anticipation. Oh Lord.

  He dragged my yoga pants down my backside slowly and stopped to Annang a finger to the ridge of my panties. "You like lace," he noted grazing the front. My body visibly spasmed under the simple, light touch. It was strange, I wasn't necessarily nervous about him seeing me half naked. I was extremely self conscience about my body but he seemed to have his eyes on one thing and one thing only.

  Pulling the rest of my leggings off, he tossed them somewhere on the floor not bothering to take his eyes away from the lace covering the most sensitive

  part of me. His eyes noticeably darkened from where I could see on my back and my breathing picked up just knowing that look. He reached for the stringy faAnnac on my hips and hooked his fingers around them. Snapping his eyes to meet mine, he held them as he slid my underwear down my legs then tossed them to the floor like he did my pants.

  It was extremely sexy the way he wouldn't break eye contact with me as he knelt down at the edge of my bed. Hooking his arms around my bent knees, he tugged me closer to his face. I gasped at the sudden movement. Fred kept his eyes on mine even as he leaned forward and placed a puckering kiss on me.

  My hips bucked wildly at the contact surprising me on how such a light touch could cause my nerves to go in a frenzy. The rough sting of his stubble grazing over my skin made me bite my lip to stifle any noises that could get through the four walls surrounding us.

  Fred's grip tightened around my legs and he ducked back down, pressing his tongue flat against me adding more pressure. I gripped at the bed sheets that were already unmade since I was too lazy to make my bed every morning but the sheets were no restraint for me at all.

  Fred spread me open wide, the scruff on his face scraping my soft skin, sending waves of ecstasy through me. The feeling of his hot mouth against me was too much for me to comprehend. In no time, I was shamelessly arching my back and grinding myself against him before it became too much and I was done for.

  I brought my hand up to cover my mouth to muffle the sounds I couldn't help but promote. Stars exploded in front

  of my eyes. My body fell back into the mattress limp and well spent. Fred unhooked his arms from around my thighs and stood up. He shamelessly licked his lips and ran his hand over his mouth to rid my juices from his plump lips. From my angle, I could see the way his jeans stretched tight across the front. He might actually need to go to the bathroom after all to fix that. Just the thought of Fred "fixing" himself in my bathroom sent a hotness from the tip of my toes to my hairline.

  I closed my thighs together as soon as Fred stood up. It now felt strange to be so exposed to him even though my sweatshirt, which now felt like a furnace against my skin, covered most of me. I expected Fred to say something but instead he smirked down at me laying on my mattress and slipped back out my door leaving me panting like a dog in heat. I laid there stunned. This needed to stop. No matter how good it felt. I have never felt such a way in my life with the way Fred makes my body jump to attention but I was getting in over my head. This was bound to blow up in my face. These benefits that came to being Fred's "friend" we're bound to make me feel something that I didn't want to feel towards someone like Fred. Mixing sex in with anything was certain to make you think you have strong feelings for someone even when you didn't. I can't have strong feelings for Fred. I can't.

  Picking myself up off my bed, I bent down and retrieved my underwear and leggings and slipped them back on.

  My mind switched to the people on the other side of the wall. I didn't hear any talking since Fred walked back out there so I think it's safe to say that no one has asked any question for what took him so long in the "bathroom". How could he be so nonchalant about this? I know for sure that I couldn't make a guy feel like that then walk out and finish watching El get her nails done while doing the bend and snap! It worried me how detached Fred was with his emotions.

  I stopped myself right there. That was none of my business and quite frankly I had too much on my plate with exams starting in a few weeks that I didn't have time to overthink every living, breathing thing that involved Fred-freakingMontgomery.

  Trying to focus on my notes a little longer was a bust considering my head was reminiscing other things. I couldn't even remember what my life was like before a few boys started taking interest in me. So instead of remembering terms, I fixed myself in the mirror and sighed.

  My cheeks were still flushed and my curls a mess. I hated wearing my hair up because it just made my face look bigger in my eyes but sighing again I pulled my hair on top of my head and fastened it with a hair tie. Taking off my sweatshirt, I changed into something not as warm and headed into the livingroom.

  No one was even watching the movie but gathered around Janet's iPad. I made eye contact with Fred as I rounded the corner to see he had excluded himself from the group and was lounging comfortably in a chair actually watching the movie which did turn out to be Legally Blonde.

  Cocking an eyebrow at him I peeked over Janet shoulder

  to see Bruce holding the iPad and showing everyone a dragon tattoo that he wanted to get. He explained how he wanted it over his shoulder and have it wrap it around his chest.

  "Annaanna," he called motioning me over to their little huddle. "What do you think of this tattoo? Pretty cool, right."

  Stepping closer to them sitting on the floor I looked at the extravagant design of a chinese dragon. It was pretty cool and I let him know this. He nodded his head enthusiastically, grinning like a monkey. "How much does one of those things cost?" Anne asked fixing her glasses while she looked at the glowing screen. "Money that you could use for other things like bills and school," Janet scolded clearly not liking the idea of tattoos.

  "That one is probably too much for what you can afford right now," Elmer said patting his large friend on the back in sympathy.

  "Maybe if you chose something else that wasn't so big or had so much detail you could get one, Bruce," I suggested sitting on the couch away from Fred and just as far as the rest of them. "You can get them as cheap as $60," I added.

  "How would you know?" Fred asked with a short laugh.

  "That's as much as mine cost," I stated. "But then again, I went to small town parler. I'm guessing things are more expensive here." "You have a tattoo?" Janet shouted, disbelief sketched on her face.

  I laughed slightly embarrassed and nodded my head.

  "Where?" Elmer asked

  "Will you show us?" Bruce winked while wiggling his eyebrows in a wave.

  "No, she's not going to show you," Fred snapped,

  his jaw clenched shut and his eyes pierced Bruce on the floor.

  I chose to ignore him though. I was confused by his angered expression and everyone else seemed to ignore him too except for Bruce who murmured something under his breath in Fred's direction. "It's just a sparrow the size of a quarter on my hip. It's nothing extravagant." I explained. It was sort of a whim that Katy talked me into on my eighteenth birthday. Since I was almost a whole year older than everyone in my grade, she thought it would be cool for me have a tattoo while everyone else couldn't. I agreed and was all for it since I've always wanted one but no one really knows about it. It was always covered.

  Bruce high fived me from where he was sitting and turned his attention back to the iPad. Feeling Fred's eyes on me from across the room, I looked up. His eyes were narrow and his jaw was clenching and unclenching as his eyes were locked with mine.

&
nbsp; I looked away quickly, feeling my cheeks heat. He had this way of seeing right through me as if he was looking into my soul.

  I wasn't willing to bare my soul if he wasn't willing to bare his.

  I got up from my spot on the couch and walked over to the kitchen to find some food. Grabbing a box of cereal, I poured some into a bowl and rummaged through the draw for a clean spoon. "I never noticed a tattoo, Raine," Fred said from behind me, the surprise of coldness making me jolt as his breath fanned over my exposed neck. Everyone was too caught up in pictures on the rectangular screen to pay any attention to us. I could feel part of

  him pressed against me but not fully as that would give too much away. I was almost disappointed. "Why would you, it's covered," I said a little too short. I put the spoon in my mouth and chewed my cereal before more word vomit spilled out.

  "I guess I was a little too preoccupied to notice. Guess I'll just have to check some other time. How about tonight?"

  I stopped chewing and set my bowl down on the counter.

  "I don't think that's a good idea," I said in a hushed voice so it wouldn't look suspicious to be talking to Fred privately.

  "And why is that?" Fred stepped back as if he was slapped by my rejection. "This," I said motioning between us. "I don't think this is a good idea. I'm not this girl, Fred, and I don't want to be made into this girl. Yeah it's fun, maybe for you, but I'm too sensitive for this. This is too much and I don't want to continue the pattern we have going on here."

  Fred looked at me as if I grew another head. "Did you not like it?" He asked a little too loud. I shushed him and stepped closer so we didn't have to talk too loud. Peeking over his shoulder I noticed how none of our friends were even looking our way. I took a deep breath. "Yes, Fred, I did. But I can't. I shouldn't. Please tell me you don't actually want to continue whatever we got going on between us. Which, as you've said, is nothing. So it's not anything you'll miss, right? You can get anyone-- you have others that are more than willing to knock it out of the ballpark. I'm not one of them because I want to have a relationship with someone not just to fool around." I watched his face closely, semi-hoping that he would reject. But his expression was passive and blank, well practiced if you ask me.