To Have and to Hold (Cactus Creek Cowboys)
Page 28
“You have to see Elizabeth and your child. I can’t marry you until you do.”
***
Naomi had endured two days of misery such as she’d never known. It was made worse because she couldn’t confide in anyone. She hadn’t heard from Colby since he left her hotel room. She didn’t know if he was in jail, still camped out on the mountain, or if he’d mounted up and ridden away. She had punished herself emotionally for insisting she wouldn’t marry him until he’d seen Elizabeth, but she couldn’t have done anything else. She couldn’t commit to being his unless he could do the same. She couldn’t imagine how she could just forget a child of hers, so she couldn’t believe Colby could.
“What’s wrong with you?” Cassie asked. “You’ve been looking like you were somewhere else ever since you got back from that hotel.”
Naomi had been eager to get back to the wagon train and her friends. The night spent with Colby remained too vividly in her mind, was associated too closely with the hotel. Being back restored some sense of order in her life, helped steady her emotions. There were times it felt like she’d dreamed that night in his arms.
“I’m worried about where we’re going, what we’re going to do when we get there.”
She had volunteered to watch Little Abe for the afternoon, but Cassie had said she wanted company more than help. They were sitting under the shade of a tree that didn’t look like any tree Naomi had seen back in Kentucky. The women and children were enjoying a sunny day made pleasant by a cool breeze from the Sangre de Cristo Mountains while the men were in town trying to find a guide.
“There’s no point in worrying,” Cassie said. “We’ll do whatever the men decide.”
“Doesn’t that bother you?”
“What?”
“Doing what men decide without having any say in what happens to you or your children?”
“I don’t want to decide what happens to everybody else. Do you?”
“No, but I’d like to be asked what I think.”
Cassie laughed. “Men don’t care what women think. Besides, we have enough to do taking care of children and running the house. Why would you want more work?”
Cassie would never understand. She had accepted her place in the world and was happy with it. The other women in Spencer’s Clearing had done the same. Why was she different? Had being different cost her Colby? Why hadn’t she heard from him?
“Do you ever think of Colby? I thought you liked him.”
Naomi looked down at the baby who had gone to sleep in her arms. “Everybody did. Even you.”
Cassie laughed again. “You know what I mean.”
Naomi decided it was useless to pretend. “I liked him very much.”
“I wonder where he is.”
Naomi was almost bursting to tell somebody what had happened, but she held her tongue.
“Are you tired of staying with the wagons doing nothing?” Cassie asked. “I want to go into the town, go in the shops, eat at a restaurant, hear some music, go dancing.”
“I’d rather they found a guide so we could be on our way. I can’t wait until we have a house again.”
“Ethan says we won’t have houses like we’re used to. He says we’ll have cabins with dirt floors. He says—”
“Ethan doesn’t know any more than the rest of us.”
“He’s been into town and talked to people. He says they don’t have sawmills where we’re going.”
“Are you going with us?” Naomi hadn’t given much thought to Cassie lately, but she hadn’t forgotten the girl’s intention of marrying the first man to ask her.
“Ethan says I can’t marry just anybody. He said he’ll take care of me until I can find a good husband.”
At that moment, the paragon of thoughtfulness came riding up. Naomi wasn’t surprised when he headed toward them. She was surprised when he turned to her rather than Cassie.
“Colby is in jail. He says he needs you to do something for him.”
***
“Are you sure you should do this?”
Ethan had tried to persuade her to wait for their father, but Naomi had insisted on leaving at once. “Colby wouldn’t have asked me to come to him if it weren’t important.” She hadn’t expected the prison would be the military barracks.
“You don’t even know why he’s in jail. Maybe he got in a fight and killed someone.”
“He wouldn’t do that.”
“How do you know?”
Naomi didn’t answer. They had reached the courtrooms that were part of the governor’s palace.
Once they were inside, Ethan said, “Wait here.” Then he disappeared.
The stern and disapproving faces of the men in the room did nothing to calm Naomi’s nerves. However, once they sensed she wasn’t going to interrupt their various activities or require anything of them, they ignored her. Naomi had never been so happy to be considered of no consequence. After what seemed like an unreasonably long time, Ethan returned accompanied by a soldier.
“They weren’t going to let you see Colby,” Ethan said. “I talked them into it, but this soldier has to accompany you.”
Naomi wished the soldier would smile rather than look as though he’d rather be facing combat.
“He’s in the barracks jail,” the soldier said. “It’s not a place for a woman.”
“I’m sure I’ll be perfectly safe as long as you’re with me.”
“I’ll be there too,” Ethan said. When she looked surprised, he said, “You don’t think I’d let my sister go into such a place without me or my father, do you?”
It seemed that being responsible for Cassie had matured Ethan. He’d never worried about her safety before.
The soldier led them out of the courtroom, through two smaller rooms, then out into a courtyard. They crossed a street and entered a low adobe building of no beauty or redeeming aspects. The inside was like a rabbit warren. She was lost after the third turn. They stopped before a door that was reinforced by iron straps.
“This is the jail,” the soldier said. “If anyone speaks to you, act as though you didn’t hear them.”
“There’s nothing but drunks, thieves, and cutthroats in here,” Ethan said. “I tried to get him to let you meet Colby in one of the empty rooms, but he wouldn’t agree.”
“When we reach his cell, you’ve got five minutes,” the soldier told Naomi. “Don’t waste it.”
The moment Naomi passed through the doorway, the man in the cell opposite leapt to his feet with a shouted profanity that caused Naomi to flinch. “I don’t know whether I’ve gone to heaven or hell, but that’s a woman I see, and a pretty one at that.”
Every man in the jail started shouting or banging on something. After hearing what the next man said—something she didn’t understand and didn’t want explained—she hummed to herself to block out the din. Colby was standing at his door when she arrived.
“Thank god you’re here,” he hollered so she could hear. “I was afraid they wouldn’t let you come.”
“Tell her what you want,” Ethan shouted. “I want to get her out of here as soon as possible.”
“I tried to do what you asked,” Colby yelled to her, “but Elizabeth’s father still has a guard posted at night. It took me a full day to convince the guard to get a message to you. It cost me every cent I had with me.”
“Can you shut them up?” Ethan yelled to the guard. “She can’t hear what he’s saying.”
“It’s not my concern,” the guard replied.
Naomi turned on the man. “Colby paid you for these five minutes. That may be a common practice here, but I doubt you’d like me to complain to one of the judges that you took a prisoner’s money then cheated him of what he’d paid for.”
The guard gave her a furious look, then turned and started down the hall that fronted the cells.
Apparently both threats had been made good in the past because the noise stopped almost immediately. There was some low grumbling, then silence.
“Get on with it,” he said to Naomi when he came back. “Your time’s almost up.”
“I’ll ask Papa for the money to get you out,” Naomi said to Colby.
“I don’t want your money. I want you to go to Elizabeth.”
“I can’t do that.”
“You must. It’s the only way I’ll get out of here or see my child.”
“I don’t know her. I don’t know what to say. I don’t even know where she lives.”
“Time’s up,” the guard said. “You have to leave now.”
“I haven’t finished.”
“You leave, or he gets no supper and rats to keep him company.”
“She lives on San Francisco,” Colby said. “Anyone can show you her house.”
Ethan was already pulling her away from the cell.
“She married an American named Haman Stuart,” Colby shouted after her.
***
Naomi stared at the white-washed adobe wall that surrounded the home of Elizabeth Stuart, a woman she didn’t know, had never seen, and yet had to convince to help the man she jilted. She not only didn’t know what to say, she didn’t know what she wanted to say, but she had to think of something. At any moment, Colby could be brought before a judge. She had no idea what punishment he might receive.
She pulled the rope and heard a bell ring in the distance.
She wished she had brought her father with her, but she felt certain a strange man would have been denied a meeting with Elizabeth unless her husband or father was present. Naomi was certain of only one thing: The success of her mission depended on meeting Elizabeth alone.
The gate swung open to reveal a young woman. “May I help you?”
Naomi was relieved she spoke English. “My name is Naomi Kessling. I wish to speak with Mrs. Elizabeth Stuart.”
“She is expecting you?”
“No, but tell her it’s urgent I speak with her on behalf of Colby Blaine. He’s in jail and needs her help to avoid serious punishment.”
“You may wait in the courtyard while I take your message.”
From the outside, the adobe building appeared little different from others. However, once inside the courtyard, it was obvious this was the home of a wealthy woman. The ground was covered in paving stones. Benches lined the walls decorated with mosaic designs. Comfortable chairs were grouped in the shade of a low tree with spreading branches. In a sunny corner, clothes had been hung out to dry. The house itself was made of adobe that had been white washed recently so that it was almost blinding in its whiteness. Naomi had made several circuits of the courtyard before the door opened.
“Mrs. Stuart says she will see you.”
Naomi entered a wide hall that extended the length of the house and was interrupted only by a staircase. Though clearly the home of an American, Naomi could see the Spanish influence in the heavily carved chairs and tables as well as pictures in gilt frames. Rugs scattered along the hall showed patterns unfamiliar to her. She was ushered into a room immediately to the right.
She didn’t know what she had expected Elizabeth to look like—Colby had never described her—but the woman seated on an embroidered settee couldn’t be the woman Colby knew. The signs of youthful loveliness were still present, but she looked more than forty. Her skin appeared dry and taut over the bones of her face, her hands almost skeletal. Her meticulously groomed hair was streaked with gray. Her extreme thinness gave her the appearance of one who was recovering from a grave illness.
“There must be some confusion,” Naomi said. “I asked to see the Elizabeth Stuart who knew Colby Blaine.”
“I understand your confusion, but I am indeed the Elizabeth who knew Colby.” She pointed to a chair next to the settee. “Won’t you have a seat and tell me what I can do to help him?”
Despite her physical appearance, her voice sounded young and vibrant. Her eyes were steel gray and brimmed with the energy that seemed to have deserted the rest of her body.
“I’m not entirely sure where to begin.”
“Why don’t you start when Colby left Santa Fe?”
“The last time Colby was released from jail, he was told to leave Santa Fe and not come back or he might be shot.”
Her gaze didn’t falter. “My father is very unforgiving. We were both imprisoned for what we did.”
Her meaning couldn’t be misunderstood yet Naomi felt no sympathy for her. “Colby served in the Union Army during the war. He was on his way to visit his parents’ graves when he kept our small wagon train from being massacred in an Indian attack.”
“Now tell me why you’re here. I can see you’re in love with him, but you don’t need my help with that.”
“Actually I do.” All the words she’d rehearsed went out of her mind. “Colby has asked me to marry him. I very much want to be his wife, but he has to settle with his past before he can be the husband and father I know he can be. He can’t forget you bore his child, a child he’s never seen.”
Elizabeth seemed to turn to ice. “What does he want from me?”
“Ask your father to see he’s released then grant him one interview. After that, he’ll never bother you again.”
Elizabeth thawed perceptibly. “How can you promise that?”
“Because I will be the wife he needs and provide him with the family and sense of belonging he’s never had.”
After several moments during which Elizabeth neither moved nor spoke, she reached for a small bell on the table next to the settee. When a servant answered her summons, she said something to the woman in Spanish after which the woman withdrew.
“I’d never met anyone like Colby.” Elizabeth seemed to be remembering out loud rather than talking to Naomi. “He was so handsome, so full of energy, practically bursting with life. I was swept away by him.” She met Naomi’s gaze with a faint smile. “I expect you understand that.”
“I was determined not to like him.”
“I don’t think it’s possible for any young woman to dislike Colby when he makes up his mind to be attractive.”
“I think he thought of me as a challenge. Before we knew it, both of us were lost.”
“But you don’t feel lost now, do you?”
“No. I don’t understand anything about this country, but I’m never worried when I’m with Colby.”
“That’s how I felt when I was with him. Unfortunately, I wasn’t with him when I learned I was going to have a child. My father gave me an ultimatum. Either I marry a man of his choice, or I would go into a convent and give up the baby. I’m not a strong person, but I couldn’t give up my baby. My husband is a good man, but I don’t love him and he doesn’t love me. Nor does he love my children.”
Before Naomi could ask for an explanation, the door opened and two children entered. The girl went straight to their mother, but the boy stopped to stare at Naomi. She didn’t need anyone to tell her Colby was the father of both children. She could see him in the face of each child.
It was morning and they hadn’t been expecting a guest, but both children were formally dressed. The boy wore long pants, a white shirt with a tie and a coat. The child looked like a miniature man. He couldn’t play in those clothes.
Elizabeth spoke to the servant. “Caroline, tell Louis I need him immediately.” She then turned back to Naomi. “This is Peter and Esther. They’re twins. Children, I’d like you to meet Miss Naomi Kessling.”
Naomi’s heart melted. She could see the youthful Colby in this child. “How old are you?” It sounded stupid to ask that of a child she’d just met, but her thoughts were in chaos.
“We are four,” Peter said, including his sister. “We had a nice birthday party.”
He sounded so grown-up. She wondered what Colby was like at that age, what he would have been like if he’d been in a good home with loving parents. Maybe he would have been like this little boy, bright, confident, and secure in his mother’s love.
“Did you have cake and get lots of presents?”
“Grandpapa said we got too many presents.”
Naomi glanced at Elizabeth, expecting her to comment, but a male servant had entered the room and she was speaking to him in Spanish.
“I don’t think it’s possible to get too many presents,” Naomi told Peter. “Did you have fun opening them all at once?”
“Grandpapa said I could open only one each day.”
“That’s like having a birthday every day.”
“Esther cried.”
All was not well in this house despite the money and the servants. This little boy acted like an adult, not a child of four. His sister depended on the protective presence of her mother.
“Peter, come here and sit down,” Elizabeth said to her son. “You’ll tire our guest.”
“Not at all,” Naomi hastened to assure Elizabeth. “I think he’s a charming little boy. I would love to have one just like him.”
A strange look came over Elizabeth’s face, almost like she’d discovered the answer to some problem and was relieved yet fearful.
Peter settled himself on the settee next to his mother. “Grandpapa says I’m a young man. He says I must not act like a little boy.”
“Are you very busy today?” Elizabeth asked Naomi.
“I have nothing to do except get Colby released from prison.”