Coming Home

by Stacy Hawkins Adams

  Dayna wanted to give her friend a hug, but she knew that would make Audrey feel pitied.

  “I say good riddance to Raymond and to your old flame Oscar,” Dayna said. “Oscar may have been a jerk, but there are other good guys out there, Audrey. And not all of them ditch their fiancée the week of the wedding.”

  “You’re right,” Audrey said. “I must have a knack for choosing duds, huh? Oscar should be contacting me to apologize for calling it quits three days before our ceremony. It has been four years and I haven’t heard a peep from him. Probably somewhere convincing another woman how wonderful he is.”

  Dayna sighed and stared ahead. “Yeah, he probably is. Just let it go.”

  The women finally settled into their cars and parted ways. Before she drove off, Dayna sent a text to Warren, knowing she probably wouldn’t get a reply since he was out sailing.

  Hey, babe. Thinking of you. Attended Chas Carter’s church with Audrey today and service was awesome.

  Tell Michael and Mason I said hi. Headed to Duchess’s place.

  Hope to see you later today, as planned. xoxo

  Then Dayna called Duchess to let her special friend know she was on the way. By the time she arrived, Duchess should be ready to eat and share a few stories about her “good church folk.”

  “Hi, Duchess — almost there!” she said into the answering machine Duchess still insisted on using because it worked well and there was no danger of getting cancer from holding a phone too close to one’s ear “tryin’ to hear too much.”

  Dayna called Vanora next and wound up leaving her a message too. “Hey, V, just touching base to say hi. I’m heading over to your aunt’s house for a Sunday afternoon visit. Duchess keeps insisting that you’re overdue for a visit. Call me when you get a chance, so we can catch up and plan your trip to town.”

  Dayna placed the cell phone in its holder on her dashboard and cranked up the volume on her radio. Kirk Franklin’s latest filled the air, and she bobbed her head to the beat while the lyrics reminded her that fear and faith can’t occupy the same space. When would she finally get this, especially when it came to matters of the heart?

  Wait until she told Duchess about Brent’s surprise visit last month and all that had transpired. Dayna couldn’t wait to hear Duchess’s perspective. Her spunky, seventy-five-year-old wisdom always rang true, even when it was hard to hear. Dayna wasn’t sure what Duchess would say about the responsibilities she had allowed herself to be sucked into in recent weeks, but she was certain she would leave Duchess’s presence with a better understanding of what to do going forward and whether that path was pleasing to God. It was actually refreshing to care again.

  forty-five

  Duchess had been hard-headed again.

  “Didn’t I make it clear when I called yesterday that I was treating you to lunch?” Dayna tried to remain respectful but couldn’t hide her annoyance.

  The elderly woman, whose beauty defied her age, brushed off Dayna’s comments with her customary cackle. “Come on in here, child, and take off your shoes. The dumplings and cornbread will be ready in fifteen minutes. No need for you to go to all of that trouble when my cooking is better than any Calero restaurant you would have taken me to.”

  She left Dayna standing on the porch and hustled back to the kitchen to check a pot on the stove.

  Dayna shook her head in disbelief before relenting and opening the screened door that led to Duchess’s cozy living room, which equaled the size of Dayna’s master bedroom walk-in closet. The modest rancher was just half an hour away from Dayna’s magazine-cover beautiful neighborhood of manicured lawns and mini-mansions, but driving from one section of Calero to the other was like entering a new state. Even so, walking into Duchess’s home was like wrapping oneself in a cozy, comfortable blanket.

  “It wasn’t about the caliber of the food, Duchess,” Dayna said. “It was about giving you a break and allowing me to do something nice for you. That’s a good thing every once in a while, you know?”

  Duchess shuffled into the room in her stockinged feet and bedroom slippers and opened her arms wide for a hug. Dayna bent low so the tiny woman could wrap her thin brown arms around her neck.

  “You do something nice for me every time you come and see me, young lady. You could be off on that boat with that handsome man you’re dating or spending time with friends your age. When Vanora told me you were moving to the area almost four years ago, I knew I’d meet you, but I didn’t know I’d get a chance to love on you.”

  She cackled again before heading back to the kitchen, which Dayna had decided was the room in the house where Duchess must feel most at home.

  Dayna trailed behind her. “You’re so sweet, Duchess. I’m glad we’ve gotten to know each other too. I’ve loved Vanora since we met at freshman orientation at Alabama U. Having her great-aunt in my life is an extra blessing. But Ms. Mary ‘Duchess’ Miller was not supposed to be cooking me a meal today. Did you go to church this morning?”

  Duchess pulled a pound cake from the oven with two elbow-length pot holders and placed the Bundt pan on top of another pot holder waiting on the kitchen counter. She stood to her full five feet and put her hands on her slender hips.

  “You know I did, and that choir sure did sing. I wish you’d visit me on a third Sunday, when the young adults are up there rocking the place. Whenever you come, you always happen to hear the seasoned citizens dragging through their old tunes.”

  “Duchess!”

  “What?” She peered at Dayna with childlike innocence over the rims of her large, round eyeglasses.

  If Duchess were one of her own aunts or her grandmother, Dayna would have reminded her that she fit into the “seasoned citizen” category herself. But as much as Duchess loved her like family, Dayna decided she best not go there. If this little lady believed she was more fly than her peers, so be it.

  By the time the two women sat down to eat a few minutes later, they had already traded highlights from the Sunday sermons they’d heard, and Dayna had begun giving Duchess blow-by-blow details of the hospital fundraiser she attended with Warren last month. Duchess loved hearing about Dayna’s job and all of the excitement and stress that came with it.

  “Now, what did you wear?”

  “A stunning red dress, if I say so myself,” Dayna said, and laughed. “You would have been proud. Warren was quite happy to be my escort.”

  Duchess smiled and finished chewing a bite of food.

  “Good girl. You keep that up after you marry him, you hear? Don’t start letting yourself go just because you get the ring.”

  Dayna shook her head. “Why is it that every time Warren comes up in a conversation you wind up talking about marriage and a ring?”

  “Your eggs are getting old, girl. You better stop playing and move on if that man isn’t thinking about giving you a ring. When will you be forty?”

  Dayna sighed and took a sip of sweet tea. Usually she drank it unsweetened, but when Duchess took the time to make it special for her, she made sure to oblige.

  “In two years, but I’m sure my eggs are fine.” She decided not to get into a discussion about how she didn’t feel giving birth was necessary for her to become a mom.

  Duchess raised an eyebrow and took a bite of cornbread. “So what did Mister Warren have to say when everyone else saw you in that dress?”

  Dayna was glad the conversation was shifting; this would be a good time to get Duchess’s feedback on everything else that had transpired since that foundation ball.

  “Actually, he wasn’t too happy with the person who saw me in the dress before he did. My ex-husband showed up at my house that night, just before the ball.”

  Duchess stopped mid-chew. “What you say?”

  Dayna sat back in the chair and folded her arms. When Duchess lapsed into slang, Dayna knew she had her rapt attention.

  “Yep. I was stunned too. I hadn’t talked to Brent since we left that Alabama courthouse, after the judge declared us divorced. I co
uldn’t believe it. But there he was, in flesh and blood, on my doorstep, bearing a bouquet of roses and an apology.”

  Duchess shook her head. “You never know what the wind will blow your way, baby; you’ve just got to be prepared to dance to the music God provides.”

  Dayna let that wisdom marinate.

  “Hmph, I never thought about it like that; that’s deep.”

  Duchess shrugged. “It’s the truth, honey. Live long enough and you’ll find out just how much. When my first husband left, he came back a year and a half later, but it was much later than he expected. Husband number two was on board, and he was prepared to honor the vows he made before God. Those clichés always have some truth to them — you don’t miss your water ‘til your well run dry! Ha!”

  As she often did when she spent time with Duchess, Dayna felt like she was talking to a wiser, more seasoned version of Vanora.

  Duchess sat back and folded her arms. With her salt-and-pepper hair pulled back into a bun and her flawless caramel complexion, she could pass for the sister of actress Diahann Carroll. “You mean he lives less than an hour away? Tell me again, how long have you two been divorced?”

  “Seven years. And he married his current wife six months after our divorce.”

  “My Lawd,” Duchess said. “Sounds to me like he’s playing with fire. Aren’t you two about the same age? He’s at that midlife crisis stage where men begin to lose their minds. Don’t let him pull you into his foolishness.”

  She pushed her chair away from the table and returned with two dessert plates and the pound cake, which was now cool enough to slice. The aroma tempted Dayna, but she tried not to let it distract her.

  “You could be right,” she said, and waited for Duchess to settle into her seat again. “It turns out that Brent is dying of cancer. He tracked me down and rang my doorbell that night to ask my forgiveness for cheating on me and divorcing me.”

  “Oh, my,” Duchess said. “Well, bless him.”

  “There’s more.”

  Duchess peered over her eyeglasses and waited.

  “I went to dinner with him and his wife, Tamara — who is the woman he cheated with — and I told him that while it had taken a while, all was forgiven. I didn’t mention my years in therapy or the thousands it cost me, but I told him I no longer hold a grudge and haven’t for a long time. Well, it should have ended there, but then he kept talking and landed on the topic of a long-held dream to establish a scholarship fund for college athletes who suffer injuries and lose their way. His goal is to hook them up with mentors and with guidance that can help them thrive in school and build a solid career, even if their sports dream has faded.”

  Duchess nodded. “Sounds like he has a big heart. But what does this have to do with you?”

  “Well, when I described to him what I do on staff at Chesdin Medical, as one of the hospital’s executives, he got the great idea that I need to be on his planning team, to help establish his foundation before he passes away.”

  Dayna filled her in on all that had happened with his visits to Calero, with his wife’s trepidation, and most recently, with Brent summoning her to his hospital bedside.

  “Not only that, he had the nerve to tell me that he loves Tamara but he still loves me too.”

  “I believe it.” Duchess shook her head.

  Dayna frowned. “Which part — that he had the nerve to say that, or that he actually loves us both?”

  “I believe that he had the nerve to say it, and that he wants to have his cake and eat it too.”

  With that, Duchess sliced the pound cake and slid a piece of the still-warm dessert in front of Dayna, who smirked.

  “Very funny, Duchess,” she said, and picked up her fork to dig in. She took a bite of the melt-in-your-mouth dessert and sighed. “Oh, my goodness. Will you please move in with me and cook like this for me all the time?” She pleaded verbally and with her eyes.

  Duchess grinned. “How about I just deliver the meals? You can keep that ritzy part of town for you and those other corporate-type folk. I been here for nearly forty years, and I’m staying in this place until the Lord says otherwise. Now, back to what we were discussing. What are you going to do about this old flame, your former husband … what’s his name?”

  “Brent. Brent Davidson. He was a football star at our alma mater until a serious injury sidelined him. He could have gone pro. Thankfully he was smart too, so he turned his focus to his engineering degree and now he works for NASA.

  “Seriously, though, how should I handle this going forward?” Dayna continued. “I mean, I’m committed to helping him get the foundation established, and I have several friends from work helping too, but I’m not sure how fast we can move this along. We already meet weekly, but it’s going to require more frequent meetings, and I don’t think Brent will be up to traveling.

  “Then there’s the issue of me traveling to his place to work on the project, even though his wife resents it. And here’s the kicker: he told me when I visited him at the hospital that he wants me to lead the foundation board instead of Tamara.”

  “We’re going to have to pray about this one, baby.” Duchess shook her head and clasped her palms. “There’s no way you can do that to his wife. I know what she did years ago was wrong, but two wrongs don’t make a right. This might be his project, but he can’t step on people like that, especially the person he’s married to. If you can’t convince him to give up that idea, you may just have to leave this alone.”

  That thought startled Dayna. She hadn’t considered that completely stepping back from the project was an option. What if she handed the reins to her hospital colleague Carmen and let her work directly with Tamara? That would take Dayna out of the fray and maybe lessen the tension she was feeling between herself, Tamara, and Brent.

  “Duchess, you might just be on to something.”

  She’d call Carmen first thing in the morning to ask if she’d be willing to play a larger role in launching the foundation.

  “But what do I do if Brent calls me to come visit him again? Drop everything and get to his bedside?”

  “Let me pray about that too,” Duchess said. “My first thought is yes, go. Because you don’t know why he’s calling you and what he needs to tell you to give him peace as he prepares to make this transition. You need to make yourself available to him as much as you feel comfortable, without disrespecting his wife or yourself; that’s what forgiving someone is about. But at the same time, you can’t let his needs interfere with your job or with your relationship with Warren. Brent is no longer your husband. So while you definitely want to be supportive and caring, you must remember, and possibly remind him, that he made choices that don’t give him permission to dictate your comings and goings.”

  Dayna’s head was spinning just thinking about it all. Duchess was right; why had she felt guilty for reaching a similar conclusion on her own? She was so glad she had opened up to her friend. But as usual, that gratitude was tinged with sadness over the fact that she couldn’t have talks like this with Mama. In the short time she had known Duchess, this kind lady knew her heart and her life circumstances more intimately than Mama ever would.

  Dayna scooted her chair back from the table and gathered the dishes. She carried them to the sink so she could begin rinsing them. “How is Warren handling all of this?”

  Dayna shrugged and peered into the backyard through the small window over the sink.

  “He doesn’t say much. I keep him informed about where I’m going and what I’m doing with regard to Brent, but he’s pretty tight-lipped about it.”

  “That’s not a good sign. Be careful.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “It sounds like he may resent all of the attention you’re giving Brent, but he isn’t going to say anything because Brent is dying. Just be mindful to stay on top of things, and don’t neglect Warren if you can help it. He’s a good man and he loves you. I can tell from the few times I’ve met him. Don’t let him get away.”<
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  Dayna’s thoughts turned to the concern she’d a few days ago when Lily was at his house on her day off, helping with the boys, and again today when he’d announced he was going sailing and didn’t invite Dayna to join him. Duchess was right; she needed to be more attentive and watchful.

  Until recently, Brent had been a tucked-away part of her past. Warren represented her future, and it was one she was looking forward to cultivating.

  forty-six

  The warm sand slid through Tamara’s toes with an ease that intrigued her. Over and over again, she dipped her bare foot in the warm, grainy sand, and as she pulled it back to the surface, tiny granules slid in between and over her toes like water. The exercise was hypnotizing in its simplicity, and with all of the things going on in her life right now, it was also soothing.

  Mom had convinced her to leave the house for just an hour to relax and get her mind off Brent, who was still in the hospital. When Mom had stopped by after church today and found Tamara sitting in a pile of laundry, looking too weary to sort or fold it, she had pushed her out the door.

  Tamara kept a beach-ready bag in the trunk of her car, so when she set off from the house, she knew exactly where she’d go. Living in Cocoa Beach had its advantages. In ten minutes, she had reached her destination.

  She sat here now, looking past young and old couples, kids creating sand castles, and women with perfect and imperfect bodies, to take in the beauty of the ocean. The waves and the wind soothed her, slowing her heart to a steady, comforting beat.

  Tamara adjusted her shades and pulled her oversized, floppy yellow sunhat lower on her head. Mom would have a fit if she knew she had come to the beach midday when the sun was its hottest and in the best position to tan one’s skin. Never mind that Tamara had slathered herself with sunblock, and never mind her honey complexion; if she wanted to keep it that way, Mom, like so many other sisters of color, was convinced that the sun was to be avoided at all times.