Indulgence

by Liz Crowe

  “First door,” he said.

  That was easier than I had expected. I rolled to my feet, but my knees gave way, and I caught myself on the couch arm. Kirk moved toward me, but I willed my legs to work before he got close enough to touch me.

  “Leave the door open,” he called after me.

  “Right because where am I going to go?”

  He raised an eyebrow.

  I flipped on the bathroom light—it wasn’t as if there were even any windows for me to escape through, so I wasn’t sure what the hell he didn’t want me doing in here behind closed doors.

  Not in any particular hurry to get back to the living room when I was done, I stood in front of the mirror, taking in the bruises that circled my wrists and shoulders, and the massive purple spot that covered my right side.

  I turned on the sink and scrubbed my hands, digging out all of the grime from under my fingernails. It was the most of their filth I could get rid of at the moment.

  I cupped my hands and splashed the water over my face, then reached blindly for the hand towel.

  I jumped when it landed on my shoulder.

  “I take it I’m not allowed to wash my face without your permission either.”

  Kirk grabbed my chin, yanking my head back. “Washing your face is fine, but your smug taunts are only going to lead to pain.”

  He released me, and I rubbed the towel over my face before catching the stray droplets that had run down my neck and chest. I wished he’d stop looking at me. Even with my face covered, I could feel his eyes on me. I’d been alone with him and naked for—I didn’t even know how long.

  My stomach grumbled, and I dropped the towel to stare down at the traitor. I had much higher priorities than food. Not to mention I still felt a little nauseous.

  “Do you think you can eat?” Kirk asked.

  I rubbed my eyes and shrugged. I did, but I wasn’t telling him that, and I wasn’t going to ask him for food.

  He walked me back to the couch, apparently suspicious that I’d somehow disappear through the floor or a wall, and left me there as he went into the kitchen. I leaned against the arm of the couch, listening to the sound of his footsteps as he moved around. Now that he and I were alone, the odds had evened out.

  Aside from the fact that he was still bigger, stronger, and even if I managed to get away from him, there were eight floors and who knows how many people between me and freedom, unless I could find a fire escape.

  And clothes.

  I squinted at the door—it had a double cylinder deadbolt, so it required a key to get in and out. Yet another inconvenience that didn’t bode well for me.

  Kirk handed me two more pills and sat down a new bottle of water, and a sandwich wrapped in a napkin. Either he didn’t do dishes or he didn’t trust me with a plate. As he leaned over, I noticed the keys dangling from his belt loop. All I had to do was manage to get them off and figure out which one opened the door without him noticing.

  He returned to his desk, giving me a few minutes to eat in silence, but my mind was so busy trying to process everything else, I could have been eating cardboard on rye. And the pounding in my head wasn’t making anything easier. I left the empty napkin on the table and nestled back under the blanket. “You think Gabe drugged me?”

  I heard the squeak of his chair move then the couch shifted as he leaned his arm against it. “I’d guarantee it. Unless you make a habit of taking drugs that make you pass out.”

  “I’ve never even smoked pot.” I met his eyes, barely managing to keep my own open. Whatever I had been given was a stubborn enemy, and now that my stomach was full, it threatened to pull me back into the darkness.

  “Do you remember anything from last night?” he asked.

  I shook my head. Every time I got close to a memory, the thoughts seemed to pull away. “I remember having lunch at a coffee shop to check my email,” I mumbled. I realized the words were coming out, but I wasn’t sure why I was saying them out loud and I couldn’t stop myself. “I think I went home. I had plans to meet some friends for dinner, but I don’t remember if I even made it there. I can remember being on a sidewalk….” Some things were becoming clearer, so I hoped that by the time the drugs wore off I’d at least remember something helpful.

  Although helpful to what effect, I wasn’t sure. Figuring out how I got here probably wasn’t going to get me out.

  “It was dark and a car came around the corner with bright lights. I put my hand up to block the light. And I think that’s the last thing I remember.” My words started to run together. Whether or not I had anything else to say, my tongue was giving up the battle. I curled against the arm of the couch and felt the blanket brush gently against my skin as Kirk covered my bare shoulders.

  The movement a contrast to the chaos I felt inside, but still a reminder that nothing I knew mattered anymore. Fear was supposed to be completely set apart from anything gentle and comfortable, but here I was lying on a soft couch wrapped in a warm blanket. My brain couldn’t comprehend why, after I’d been kidnapped, and not a single person had shown an ounce of compassion for my well-being, I was currently being treated with gentleness.

  Deep inside my gut, I knew it didn’t bode well, and I still had no idea how to escape the dark fate that threatened to suffocate me within these walls.

  Chapter Three

  Bait and Trap

  I opened my eyes then jerked up to look around the room. It took my brain a few seconds to recognize the surroundings before my shock melted into disappointment. “It wasn’t a dream….”

  “Sorry,” Kirk said.

  My heart thumped in my chest, and I twisted to see him sitting at the desk behind me.

  “You’re feeling better?”

  The fog and nausea had definitely lifted, but I wasn’t sure that made anything better. “I think it wore off, but I still have a headache.”

  I looked around trying to find a clock. I had no idea how long I’d been here, or how long I’d been sleeping.

  “It’s only been about three hours since I gave you the last pain pills, so you’ll have to wait a bit.” He said as if recognizing the questions in my head. “It’s almost seven o’clock and I have to go take care of a few things before we head up to the Outlook tonight.”

  The Outlook. How vague could anyone possibly be? “You wouldn’t happen to be willing to tell me what going to the ‘Outlook’ entails?”

  “Dinner.” His quick and simple answer didn’t seem contrived, but it wasn’t comforting either. I hoped he meant real food and wasn’t using it as a vulgar euphemism.

  “And what’s for dinner?”

  He gave me a sideways glare. “I have no idea, probably steak, maybe chicken. That’s what they normally serve during business dinners.”

  I exhaled and relaxed a little. At least I wasn’t going to be the main course, and hopefully a business dinner meant there would be more talk than paying attention to me.

  Unless I was the business they were attending to. God, I begged my brain to shut up. So far, all of its ideas and conclusions had simply landed me in more trouble.

  “What? You thought on top of everything else that we’re going to cook you for dinner?”

  “No,” I scoffed. “I thought you were just using it as a sexual metaphor.”

  He pressed his lips together. “You haven’t even been cleared yet. You just have to sit, silently, and look pretty. You’ll kneel on your knees at my feet, keep your hands in your lap, and your eyes on the floor in front of you.”

  Now that I was breaking free of whatever had polluted my system, the full reality of the situation set in, tightening in my chest. I pictured myself, at some fancy dinner where everyone at the table wore suits and I sat naked on the floor next to Kirk’s feet. “I can’t do this.”

  “If you want to stay alive you will.” His tone was even, as if my begging didn’t faze him in the least.

  I jumped off the couch and backed away from him. “What you want me to do isn’t living.�
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  He took a quick step toward me, and I stumbled trying to keep my distance, grabbing my hair and slamming me into the opposite wall. With little effort, he pinned me there with only one arm and his bodyweight. “Make your choice.”

  I kneed him in the groin, and as he stooped backward, I jumped toward the door, remembering too late that I needed a key to open it.

  I spun around, but as soon as I did, my back hit the wall beside the front door. He pressed against my body so I couldn’t leverage another attack and pulled the keys off of his belt. “You want out?”

  I bit my tongue, tasting blood. I knew it was a trick question. There was no right answer and even if I did answer, he already seemed set on his path. He slid the key into the lock. I heard every pin slide and click into place, and then it squealed as the bolt released.

  He jerked open the door and shoved me out into the hallway. I stumbled and before I caught my balance, the door closed behind me.

  Oh, fucking hell. I looked up and down the hallway. You got the escape you wanted.

  But I knew it couldn’t be that easy. I started for the elevator, waiting for one of the other apartment doors to open. I was already in the fucking cage. No redemption here.

  I would have sworn that anyone on the floor could hear the thumping in my chest as my bare feet slid across the carpeted hallway. I didn’t dare break into a run, because I was just as scared of what was ahead of me as what was behind me.

  The more I thought about it—the more I thought about Gabe—what was ahead of me was far more terrifying. Running for the door was the stupidest idea yet.

  The elevator dinged and I pressed myself against the wall. It wasn’t going to help anything, but at least I didn’t feel exposed on all sides. My useless limbs trembled and my throat tightened as the elevator doors opened and a huge man with chestnut skin stepped off the elevator. He smirked when he saw me.

  “Disobedient slave looking for a home?”

  God, no. I shook my head and slid against the wall, back toward Kirk’s room. I bumped against a man’s chest and jumped away. I hadn’t even realized that Kirk had opened the door, let alone stepped out into the hallway.

  The dark-skinned man reached for me and I ducked backward managing to make it past Kirk, but then I heard the deadbolt of the door next to me release.

  Not another. I dashed back toward Kirk. The enemy you know…. The phrase flashed through my mind. I didn’t know whether it had any weight, but in the current situation I’d take the one who let me sleep relatively unharmed on his couch and gave me food and water instead of trapping me on a table in the dank basement.

  Even if I had just pissed him off.

  As I stumbled away from the opening door, the dark-skinned man caught me and shoved me into the wall.

  “She is a nice addition to the collection.”

  “Please,” I cried, knowing it was useless that anyone around here would care about my requests. I had nothing to bargain with that they wouldn’t take by force either way. Large hands pawed at me, effortlessly blocking all of my attempts at fighting back. His forearms were so big I wasn’t sure my fingers could even wrap half way around.

  His large forearm pressed against my neck, threatening to cut off my airway if he pressed just a bit harder, his hip immobilized my body, and he twisted so that one bent knee rested across my legs, preventing me from kneeing or kicking him.

  He’d obviously done this before. And the position left his other hand free to grope my naked body. I tried to shove his bulky hand away and he pressed harder against my throat.

  My body bucked and jerked, craving more oxygen than it could get through my pinched throat.

  “Behave,” he growled.

  I pushed my strength into the wall, forcing my body to stop fighting him, and he released my throat.

  “I’ll have a turn,” said the blond man from the other side of the hall. He leaned casually against the wall, watching my attack.

  One hallway and I was already up against three men.

  There was no way in hell I’d ever make it nine floors down and out of the lobby. I had to bide my time. Find a back way or some path that wouldn’t cross with half a dozen men on the way out.

  That depended on my ability to survive long enough. Survival, I thought. If I had anything on my side, it was obstinacy—sometimes blind obstinacy that got me in deeper, but I didn’t go out without a fight. The problem was that here, the fighting, kicking, and screaming that I wanted to do was going to get me killed.

  Or worse.

  The third man took another step toward us, and my chest shook until I had to close my eyes and remind myself how to breathe. I was pinned and struggling only made me more exhausted.

  “Want to play?” The dark-skinned man pulled me from the wall, moving me to stand in the middle of the group. He held me against his body with his arm around my neck while his other hand trailed down my naked sternum, over my bellybutton—

  My hands were free but tightened into useless fists at my sides. I was more afraid of what would happen if I fought. Tears burned at my eyes as my body shivered. No matter what I did—if I fought, if I gave in—the pain was going to come.

  His hand moved between my legs, and he smacked my inner thigh, forcing them apart. I bit back a scream and pulled my lower lip between my teeth to keep my mouth closed.

  “Go ahead and scream,” Kirk said. His arms were crossed over his chest. This was my punishment, he’d let whoever showed up do whatever they wanted to me. “Maybe you can get the attention of all the other men on this floor.”

  “And the one below,” the one holding me said and chuckled.

  The third man who had been mostly silent rubbed at his own growing erection through his pants.

  My vision darkened, but I held on to one last hope. Maybe I could at least delay the inevitable. As the grasp around my neck loosened, I grabbed at my last chance, throwing myself at Kirk’s feet.

  “Please, I’ll do what you want.” The operative word being ‘you’. One man I could possibly handle. Three would leave me ripped apart—body and soul.

  I expected the other two men to grab me. To drag me back into the middle of the hallway and have their way, but everyone went still.

  Horrifyingly still.

  I kept my head down, my fingers wrapped in the hem of his dark jeans. I waited for the order. Waited for him to tell them to haul me off and give them the go ahead to rip me apart.

  But he crouched in front of me, snapping my head back with a fistful of my hair. “You wanted out.”

  “No. I was stupid. I shouldn’t have.” The only way you survive is if he keeps you. It wasn’t a guarantee, but it was better than the alternative. One quiet piranha was better than an entire lake full.

  He yanked and twisted me before releasing my hair, and I toppled to the floor on my side. My arm and hip burned from rubbing against the carpet, but my attention to the pain was quickly replaced, by the images flashing through my mind. Laying sprawled on the floor with three men glaring down at me was too similar to waking up in the basement.

  There were fewer men, but now I was completely naked. Exposed for them to do as they pleased. A new wave of nausea pounded at my gut and it took some effort to swallow it down. Pulling myself back to my knees, I grasped at Kirk’s leg.

  Just take me back in the apartment. Please. My mind begged, shouting the words, that wouldn’t break free from my mouth.

  A foot against my ass knocked me forward into Kirk’s legs.

  They snickered and jeered as I tried to regain my balance.

  I was nothing to them.

  Just a toy, like Suit said. And they were like a bunch of bratty rich kids who knew that every toy was replaceable.

  My sobs vibrated through my chest, but not a single tear came. My gaze fluttered up to meet Kirk’s.

  “Please,” I whispered through my tight throat.

  As I pulled myself to my knees, the muscular arm of the man behind me tightened around my throat
again, pulling me backward as he lowered his mouth to my ear. “I think you’ll have to do better than that if you want your Master to keep you. But if you like, we can find you different accommodations.”

  He pinched my nipple, then rubbed his palm over it and gave my breast a hard squeeze. The blond who’d been waiting for a turn cleared his throat, and Kirk shot him a scowling glance waving him off.

  It was my first bit of hope. Maybe Kirk wouldn’t throw me to any of the others.

  “I am sorry,” my voice cracked.

  The arm tightened around my neck, then released again. It couldn’t have been a coincidence that the man holding me had stepped off the elevator while I was in the hallway and proceeded to play into Kirk’s interest.

  “I’m sorry, M-Master.” I was on my knees begging the man who saved me from the kidnappers to keep me captive. My brain tried futilely to come up with another solution, weighing how many people in this building could be like Kirk, against how many could be like Gabe. “Please, let me stay with you, Master.”

  Kirk flipped his hand at the man behind me, and I was released. Not even my pulse pounding through my veins was enough to make me feel alive. I was a pile of flesh and bone that happened to have a heartbeat.

  Kirk pulled me to my feet then shoved me through the open door to his apartment. I landed on my hands and knees, adding another set of carpet burns to my list of injuries. Then, a stinging impact came across my ass. I bit my bottom lip to keep in the scream and scurried farther into the apartment.

  After a second, the door slammed behind me and an arm came around my stomach lifting me up and carrying me under his arm into the bathroom. “I don’t have time for this shit. If you want to live, don’t be an idiot and we’ll get along fine.”

  He turned on the shower then dropped me to my feet and with the sudden impact, my stomach decided that it had enough.

  “I’m gonna puke,” I slapped my hand over my mouth and rushed to the toilet, heaving a few times before my nerves calmed enough for my stomach to settle. My body shook as I lay back against the cold porcelain tile.