W.H.O. Files: Potions in the Pizza

by Mikey Brooks

Ethan grabbed his sleeve, pulling him inside. They shut the door and turned back around to look at Emmy, their faces completely serious. Emmy was beginning to think it was best they not tell her anything. The less she knew the better.

  Ethan cleared his throat before speaking. “Have you noticed how strange everyone is acting about the new school lunch?”

  Whoa! That was out of left field. “What are you talking about? I thought you were going to tell me about exploding Mom’s kitchen.”

  “We’ll get to that,” Ethan said. “Just first answer the question.”

  Emmy rolled her eyes and thought back over the past couple days. She’d been eating lunch with Miss LeBeau since Wednesday so she really hadn’t noticed anything other than everyone excited to eat. That wasn’t really anything strange though, it was more excitement over getting away from class for a while. She shook her head. “No.”

  “What?” They both said in unison.

  “To be honest, I haven’t been in the lunchroom. Miss LeBeau lets me eat with her.”

  Ethan’s eyebrows scrunched together. “Emmy, that’s gross. Kids don’t eat their lunch with their teacher. Are you four years old?”

  “If you just came in here to insult me then you’re wasting my time,” Emmy snapped. “For your information Madam LeBeau thinks I am a very intelligent young lady who offers a lot to a conversation.”

  “Whoa—Madam LeBeau?” Jax repeated.

  Emmy harrumphed. She didn’t have time for this. Boys can be so stupid. She got up and opened the door. “You two may leave.”

  “But we haven’t told you about the experiment,” Ethan complained.

  “And I don’t want to know. I have better things to do with my time.”

  “Em, this is important. We think the lunch ladies are putting bad chemicals into the school lunch.”

  Emmy gave a forced laugh. “And you think I’m crazy for wanting to eat my lunch with a brilliant, sophisticated teacher? You two are the crazy ones. I need to get back to dancing.”

  “Come on, Em,” Ethan pleaded.

  “Boys,” Mama J called from downstairs. “I need you to go back over to the Orion house and close up the windows. I think it might rain later.”

  Emmy gave them a smile. Finally she could be rid of them. “It sounds to me like you have something else to do. We’ll chat later.”

  “Yeah, thanks for nothing,” Ethan said. He closed the door and Emmy couldn’t help but stare at it. His big blue eyes always made her feel so guilty when she was trying to do something that didn’t involve him. She sighed, shaking it off. In an instant she had her dance book open once more.

  Chapter Seven: Secret in the Basement

  The house still smelled like rotten eggs and overcooked cabbage. Ethan wondered if the smell would ever go away. As Jax closed the windows, Ethan scrubbed again at the stain on the countertop. No matter how much cleanser he used, that mark was going nowhere. It was like a billboard announcing him being grounded for life.

  “If my parents kick me out of the house, I can come live with you, right?”

  Jax laughed. “Dude, they’re not going to kick you out. Now if it was Emmy, that might be a different story.”

  Maybe Jax was right. Maybe he’d just confess and they’d be so happy to be back home they’d forget it. At least he hoped so. He wrung out the sponge he’d been using in the sink then grabbed the cleanser to return to the hall cupboard. He nodded his head toward the broom leaning against the kitchen wall. “Hey, Jax, can you grab the broom for me?”

  “Sure thing.”

  Ethan suddenly tripped forward. “What the heck?” He looked down to see remains of the smoke detector. He’d forgotten about destroying that too. Great, another thing to add to my list of things gone wrong.

  He reached down to pick it up at the exact time Jax bent forward. Their foreheads met with a smack and they both tumbled back. Ethan dropped the cleanser. Jax dropped the broom. It tipped back and slammed into the wall. A beep sounded and the wall popped out about an inch.

  Shaking the slight pain from his head, Ethan moved in closer to the wall, inspecting where the broom had hit. There was a small panel he’d always mistaken for a light socket. “What in the world . . . ?”

  “Dude, it’s a door!” Jax pulled the wall back. Behind it, a flight of stairs went down. They looked at each other in bafflement. Ethan didn’t know what to say. He’d never even thought something like this could be hidden in his house. “I didn’t know you had a basement.”

  “Neither did I.”

  Ethan grabbed the broom for protection. Jax snatched a frying pan from the pot rack, and they descended the steps into the dark basement. The stairs seemed to go on for some time and Ethan was beginning to wonder where they were being led. When they came to the bottom of the shaft, another door awaited them. It had a keypad next to the handle.

  “Dude! Your parents are secret agents. Look at that. This lock is all high tech.”

  Ethan tried the handle, but it was locked. He ran his fingers over the keypad, trying to think of a password to punch in. He tried his parents’ anniversary. The key pad blared a warning at him. “Not that.”

  “What did you try?”

  “Their wedding date.”

  “Try your mom’s birthday.”

  Ethan entered the date and again the keypad angrily beeped at them. He tried his dad’s birthday—another angry beep. What else would they use?

  “Try your birthday!” Jax said.

  Ethan wasn’t too sure it would work. His parents hadn’t even bothered to call them. Right now, Ethan and Emmy seemed to be the lowest thing on their parents’ lists, why would they use their birthday as a password? He sighed and typed it in.

  “Welcome, Orion family,” a robotic female voice said. The handle clicked.

  Ethan looked to Jax for confirmation before turning the handle. His best friend gave a nod and together they opened the door. Cool air blew out from the room, and Ethan watched as dim lights flickered to life. They saw a massive room with shelves upon shelves of books and binders. Along the far wall was a large glass case filled with what looked like futuristic guns and other strange gadgets. A long glass desk rested on the opposite wall. It held six big computer screens, all with a rotating logo of something that resembled an arrow, the acronym W.H.O. written boldly above it.

  “Dude, we just discovered your parents’ secret lair!”

  “Lair? You make it sound like they’re superheroes.” Or evil masterminds. Ethan had always wondered what his parents did for a living. The strange voice at the door had said what this room was—obviously the family business.

  “Check out these books.” Jax ran a hand along the shelf of books to his right. “These are nuts! Witch Covens of Europe 1800-1900, The Real Account of the Salem Trials, The Witches of OZ, Magic in the Wrong Hands. Dude, this stuff is crazy!”

  Ethan sat at the desk and tapped on the spacebar. A prompt for a password opened. Ethan typed in his birthday and the dark screen cleared. The logo still remained in the background but numerous file folders appeared on the desktop. Some of them read similar things to the book titles. One file was named “East Coast Witch Coven Directory, USA.” Ethan clicked it.

  Hundreds of names appeared in the file. He clicked on one, and a mug shot of a lady with cropped blonde hair appeared. She would have been pretty except for the sneer she was giving the photographer. Ethan read aloud the information under the picture.

  “Name: Primrose Blancaflor. Age: estimated 150-175—yeah, right. Coven: Olc. Last known whereabouts: Westchester County, New York. Last sighting: Bedford Hills Elementary School.” Ethan stared at the next line of information: Imposter janitorial attendant. “What the heck!”

  “Ethan, why would your parents have a bunch of junk on witches and files with mug shots?” Jax sat down next to him and Ethan minimized the file on Primrose. He scanned through the desktop files and clicked on one labeled “Missions.” It opened, re
vealing another long list of files, all of them with names of cities all over the world. Most had bold typing next to them that read “CLOSED,” while others read “ACTIVE.” The one at the top of the list caught Ethan’s interest right away: “Transylvania.”

  Ethan moved the mouse to click open the Transylvania file when a security warning popped up. One of the computer screens had the image of Mama J walking up the driveway. “Crap, your mom is coming!”

  Ethan and Jax sprung from their chairs and sped toward the stairs. They heard the door give a beep and a click as they made their way back to the kitchen. They pushed the hidden door back behind the wall just as Mama J’s voice sounded in the front room. “You boys all finished up? Papa Washington wants to play a round of Monopoly.”

  She rounded the corner of the kitchen and eyed Ethan and Jax. “What are you two up to now?”

  Ethan followed her eyes to the broom in his hands and the frying pan in Jax’s. He tried to come up with something to say but his mind was still reeling from the secret they found in the basement. Luckily, Jax came to the rescue.

  “We were just trying to clean up a little better,” Jax lied.

  “Well, it looks like you’ve done a nice job, except for that.” Mama J crossed over to the countertop and ran her hand over the brown and black stain. She hummed to herself and gave a nod. “I think I have something that will take that off. I call it my magic sponge.”

  Magic . . . the word had suddenly taken on a new meaning. The thought of what Ethan had found downstairs didn’t seem real. None of it did.

  “Well, don’t just stand there. Put those away and let’s get this party started. And promise me no matter what, you don’t give in to Papa Washington. He’s slicker than a car salesmen when it comes to Monopoly.”

  Ethan returned the broom to the closet in the hall then followed behind Mama J. Jax stepped in next to him and whispered in his ear. “Dude, we have to get back down there.”

  Ethan nodded. Jax was right. Questions raced through his mind. He needed to know more about that secret room, what his parents were doing with a bunch of stuff about witches, and what were they up to in Transylvania. And the most important question of all: what exactly was the family business?

  Chapter Eight: The Family Business

  All morning long Ethan had been giving Emmy his big blue, puppy dog eye routine. She was starting to feel guiltier by the minute. She shouldn’t have kicked him out of her room yesterday. Obviously he was concerned about something. Last night he barely paid attention to their Monopoly game. He was the first one to declare bankruptcy and acted like he didn’t care. As a math genius Ethan should have beaten their socks off.

  Once breakfast was over she cornered him in the upstairs hallway. “Look, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have kicked you out. If you want, you can tell me now.”

  “It’s not the same,” he mumbled.

  “What do you mean? It’s only been a day. Not that much has changed since then.”

  He gave an exaggerated sigh and went to push past her. She grabbed hold of his elbow and yanked him back. “Look, I said I was sorry. Cut me some slack okay? Twinroos?”

  Ethan paused then nodded his head. He looked around the hallway then motioned for them to go upstairs. “I don’t want to be overheard.”

  “Why not?”

  His voice was so low she could barely hear him. “I don’t want Jax’s parents to know. Anyway it’s better that I show you.”

  “Show me what?”

  “Shh!”

  A trickle of annoyance was starting to seep into her. She didn’t like playing games but it seemed Ethan was all about them. “Fine, then show me,” she whispered.

  “We need to go home. Can you think of some reason to sneak over to the house? I don’t want Mama J or Papa Washington knowing we’re there.”

  Emmy sighed and looked at the clock. It was only 9 a.m. She could give up a little of her dance time. Maybe she could come up with something. Ethan was horrible at lying, so it would be up to her. “Fine, but whatever I say, you and Jax go along with it, okay?”

  Ethan nodded.

  Ten minutes later, Emmy was downstairs with her dance book stowed away in her backpack. Jax’s parents were sitting in the living room watching an old black-and-white movie. “I was hoping I could go over to Madison’s to practice our routine for the talent show next month. She just lives down the street, so I can walk.”

  “That’s fine, sugar,” Mama J said.

  “I guess we’ll see you in a few hours then.” Emmy turned to leave.

  Mama J looked up with a surprised expression. “We? Are the boys going?”

  Emmy smiled. “Oh, I thought you knew. Maddie and Abby talked them into being our backup dancers. We thought it added more to the routine to have boys and girls in the dance number.”

  “Well, this is something I’ve got to see,” Papa Washington said with a chuckle. “Jaxson can’t even dance the funky chicken.”

  “With practice, he’ll be dancing in the Hamburg Ballet,” Emmy lied.

  “The Hamburg Ballet?” Papa Washington sounded even more skeptical.

  “I’m just kidding.” Emmy tried to pull herself away from the cliff she was heading toward. “You’re so right. He can’t dance worth a darn, but he makes us look that much better. Please don’t tell him I said that.”

  “Said what?” Jax said, entering the room with Ethan in tow.

  “Now you just never mind.” Papa Washington winked at Emmy. She felt a pang of guilt, but kept her smile intact. “You boys have a good time. Be respectful to the girls and make sure you’re back in time for lunch. I don’t want to have to go hunting for you.”

  “Madison’s parents are all granola so we’ll definitely be back for lunch,” Emmy said.

  “Granola?” Papa Washington asked. “Is that some new word for something?”

  “Don’t worry,” Mama J said, “You kids run along. I’ll explain what granola means.”

  The boys laughed and raced out the door. Emmy followed quickly.

  “Emmy.” Papa Washington stopped her at the door. “When you all get that dance number put together, I’d really like to see it. I used to be something on my feet when I was younger.”

  “You still are, sugar.” Mama J brushed her hands under his chin. Emmy smiled and tried not to barf. Grownups can be so gross sometimes. She turned and headed outside.

  “Come on, boys,” she said loudly. “Time to work on our choreography.”

  Ethan and Jax glared at Emmy.

  “If I heard what I think I heard . . .” Jax warned.

  “What? I said I’d get you out of the house, and I did. So you might have to dance in front of the school at the talent show, but so what? You got out of the house.”

  “You told them we were dancing in front of the school!?” Jax shouted.

  “Shhh! What are you, stupid? You want them to hear you?” Emmy didn’t understand boys sometimes. What’s the big deal? Dancing in front of the school wouldn’t make them look like losers; it would just show how well rounded they were in the arts. Emmy shook her head and stalked towards her house. “So what is it you guys are so ‘top secret’ about, anyway?”

  “I told you, I can’t really explain it,” Ethan said. “It’s easier to show. It has something to do with the family business.”

  “What about it?”

  “Like I said, I need to show you.”

  They entered through the kitchen door, and Emmy plugged her nose. The house reeked of rotten eggs and dying fish. “What did you guys do in here, dissect a sasquatch?”

  “Ha, ha, very funny, Em.” Ethan brushed her hand away from the light switch. “We’re not supposed to be here, remember?”

  Games, more games. “Fine, just show me what you want to show me already.”

  Ethan and Jax went over the wall next to the broom closet. Ethan pushed the light socket in and the wall popped out—it popped out! Jax pulled back the w
all to reveal a set of stairs leading down.

  Emmy stared in shock. “What the heck!”

  “That’s what we said,” Ethan laughed. “But Em, you haven’t seen anything yet.”

  They hurried down the stairs to a door with a keypad. “You know the code to get in?” she asked.

  “Mom and Dad picked our birthday as the password.”

  Emmy couldn’t help but smile. She was sure they would have picked something more to do with them, like their anniversary, or first date, or maybe their first kiss? The door beeped and a voice said, “Welcome, Orion Family.”

  Ethan opened the door.

  “That’s just weird.” Emmy noticed the computer screens right away. They all had a funny-looking symbol on them along with the letters W.H.O. The room was pretty big. It had to be the size of the whole lower floor of the house. Tall bookshelves lined the walls, cushy chairs, and a few doors that led to who knew where—the secret family garage and batmobile?

  “Look at some of these titles, Em.” Jax pointed to the books.

  Emmy glanced over them, noticing they all had something to do with witches. Strange prickles danced up her spine. Hadn’t she wondered about the occult when her dad had given away they were going to Transylvania?

  Ethan sat down at a computer. He pushed the mouse. Screens went to a desktop with a bunch of files. One screen showed their front yard. Mrs. MacAfee’s dog was peeing on one of the maple trees.

  “They have surveillance cameras?” she asked.

  “Oh, yeah. That baby saved our bacon.” Jax pointed to the monitor. “It warned us of a security breach, and then we saw my mom walking up the driveway.”

  “That’s why Mom and Dad were always in the kitchen when we got home.” Emmy pulled a strand of red hair away from her face and tucked it behind her ear. This is freaking nuts! “Here I thought they just always had the munchies, but their security only gave them enough time to get up the stairs. I feel like our parents have been lying to us forever.”

  “I kinda feel the same way, Em,” Ethan shared. “They talk about the family business, but they never tell us what it really is. ‘Wait until you’re older.’ How old do you have to be to know your parents keep a secret lair in the basement?”