No One Is Awake To See and Other Revealing Tales

by Jessica Tang Von Harper

  Her own image appeared on the screen. It was the photo Ben took of her from the night before. She was looking right at the camera, and Ben was next to her, smiling, with his head at an angle leaning against the top of her head. Her naked body was clearly visible, as was the black collar around her neck. And of course, the McDonalds sign glowing just above her left shoulder, in case there was any doubt that she was outside.

  Below the picture, Ben had left a message. “Thanks for the adventure. It was incredible. Here’s a reminder. xoxo Ben.”

  Chloe gazed at the picture for a few minutes. Then she closed the picture and went back to the message list. She selected the new phone number and added it to her contact list. Under first name, she put “Ben”. She wasn’t sure what his last name was.

  Chloe walked downstairs wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants. Her father sat at the kitchen table, drinking a cup of coffee. “Good morning, sleepyhead,” he said to her. “You must have been tired.”

  “Yeah…” Chloe walked to the cabinet and pulled out a box of granola. She poured it into a bowl.

  “Your brother’s gone already. They got up early this morning.”

  “Oh, yeah,” she said. “I guess I missed them. Did they get off okay?”

  “Yeah. Your mother drove them.”

  Chloe sat down at the table with her cereal. “Did they seem tired?”

  “They both seemed pretty out of it, yeah. Ben said he had trouble sleeping last night. But he seemed like he was in a pretty good mood. He said he’d just catch up on his sleep on the plane.”

  Chloe looked to her left, at Petey’s old collar and leash, hanging on a peg. “I always have trouble sleeping on planes,” she said.

  “You do?”

  “Yeah. They’re not quiet enough.” Chloe leaned over her bowl and ate a spoonful of granola.

  ***

  After she had cleared her empty dish to the sink, Chloe went to the living room. Before she could turn on the TV, her phone buzzed. She checked it and saw a new message from Marianne.

  “U still asleep?”

  Chloe sent, “Awake now.”

  Marianne sent back, “Finally!” Then: “Ur brother and his cute friend left?”

  Chloe typed, “Yes. They’re on their way to NZ.” She turned on the TV and started to flip through the channels.

  Her phone buzzed. Marianne sent, “Did u get his pic, I hope?”

  Chloe hesitated. She leaned over her phone and navigated to the list of messages, looking for the one that now had Ben’s name on it. She selected his name and instantly that picture appeared on her screen again. Ben leaning over her while she gazed insolently at the camera, naked except for the black collar around her neck, Addison Drive clearly visible behind her. She made the image bigger and moved the window so only Ben’s face was visible on the screen.

  Is that how he had looked? Yes. That cute grin. She would never forget that grin.

  Chloe reduced the image so that she could see herself again. It seemed like a dream now. Had she really walked around the neighborhood like that? Had she really been that bold?

  Chloe went to her messages and found Marianne. She read Marianne’s last message again. “Did you get his pic?”

  She pressed respond. No message, only that picture of herself and Ben. She pressed send.

  Two minutes passed before her phone buzzed with a new message. Then another message, and another, and another. Finally, her phone started to ring, with Marianne’s name on the caller id.

  Chloe didn’t answer. She giggled to herself as she continued to flip through the channels on the TV.

  MADELINE’S BIRTHDAY SUIT

  Madeline woke at seven, as she did every morning, only this day she burst from the covers without any reluctance and stood in front of the calendar hung on the wall, where a particular day was circled in gold glitter pen. It was her birthday! Today she turned twenty-six, and that evening her two best friends Anna and Vanessa had reserved the banquet hall at Martino’s Restaurant downtown for a birthday bash. All of her friends had been invited and they would have a glorious time drinking wine and dancing. Madeline couldn’t wait!

  Her phone rang. Madeline answered, and of course it was Anna. “Happy birthday, Madeline!” Anna chirped. “Would you like me to sing you the birthday song?”

  “Oh, if you like,” Madeline replied, and she stood smiling while Anna sang the song from beginning to end.

  “Are you excited about tonight?” Anna asked.

  “Oh, you have no idea! I can’t wait.”

  “Well, if you check your door… I’ve received a confirmation from the shipping company that one of your birthday presents should be sitting out there right now.”

  “Oh, Anna! You didn’t have to!”

  “Call me back after you’ve opened it.” Anna hung up.

  Madeline rushed to the door of her apartment and looked outside. A box sat on the front mat. She carried the box in and immediately cut the tape and peeked inside. “Oh my goodness! It’s perfect!” she gasped as she pulled out a crisp navy blue jacket and pencil skirt, the same outfit she’d been admiring just a week before at the store.

  She called Anna. “Oh, my dear! You’re too much! Is this the same suit I wanted from Bloomingdales last week, only I thought it was too expensive?”

  “Do you like it?” asked Anna.

  “I love it! I can’t believe you bought this for me!”

  “Happy birthday! I can’t wait to see you in it. I’m sure it will look amazing on you!”

  “Oh, Anna!” Madeline was genuinely touched by the gift. “Why, I’ll wear it tonight to the party! That’s how much I love it!”

  Anna didn’t answer at first. Then she asked, “You’ll wear it tonight?” Her voice had an odd neutral tone.

  “Yes! I really want to.”

  “So… you’re going to the party in your… birthday suit?” Again, Anna spoke in that careful way.

  “Yes! It’s perfect. I’d love people to see me in this suit tonight. I really, truly love it, Anna.”

  “You want people to see you in your birthday suit. Tonight, at the party.”

  “Yes! Don’t you think?” Madeline was confused by Anna’s strange reaction.

  “I think that would be great. Madeline, would it be okay if I sent out an e-mail to the other guests? To let them know you’ll be attending the party in your… ah… birthday suit?”

  “Well, yes, if you want to. You’re the one who gave me this present, after all. You’re certainly welcome to share the credit when I show up at the party looking absolutely amazing.”

  Anna made an odd choking noise, as if she was struggling to breathe. But when she spoke, her voice was slow and deliberate. “Okay. I’ll inform the guests. Happy birthday! I’m glad you like your first present… I have a few others for you, you know!”

  “Oh, you didn’t have to! You spoil me.”

  “It’s your day. Talk to you in a bit.”

  “Okay. Thanks again!”

  Madeline ate a banana and some cottage cheese for breakfast, then took a quick shower. Clad in her bathrobe, she sat at her computer and checked her e-mail. She saw an e-mail from Anna and read it. It was a reminder that the party was that night, and at the end, mentioned that Madeline would be celebrating the occasion by attending the party in her birthday suit.

  “It really is a lovely suit,” Madeline murmured.

  Her phone rang. Madeline picked it up. “Hello?”

  It was Vanessa. “Hi, Madeline! Happy birthday!”

  “Thank you! I can’t wait for tonight.”

  “Me, too. But… did you see the e-mail that Anna just sent out?”

  “Yes, I just read it,” Madeline said.

  “She says that you’re going to the party in your birthday suit? She’s joking, right?”

  “She’s not joking. I spoke to her this morning. I told her I was excited to be at the party and to have everyone see me in my lovely birthday suit!”

  Vanessa giggled. “Are
you serious? My gosh, Mads… you really are intending to have a wild time tonight, aren’t you?”

  “I absolutely am!” Madeline confirmed. “You only turn 26 once, right?”

  “Well… I’ll definitely respect your courage… if you go through with it.”

  “Oh, I will. Why wouldn’t I?”

  Vanessa giggled again. “Okaaaay. See you tonight, Mads.”

  “See you tonight!”

  Madeline had barely put the phone down when it rang again. “Hello?”

  It was Max, who sat a few cubicles down from her at work. “Hey… Madeline? It’s Max.”

  “Oh, hi, Max!”

  “Hi! Um… happy birthday, right? Is today your actual birthday?”

  “It is! Thank you. You won’t see me at work today, I have the day off!”

  “Right, right. Um… Madeline… I’m coming to your party tonight… but I just got an e-mail from your friend Anna. She says you’re going to be there in your birthday suit? Is that really true?”

  “Yes, it is.”

  “Okay… but I mean… really?”

  “Yes, really! When you see it, you’ll understand why. I promise you, you’ll think that I look so nice.”

  Max cleared his throat. “Well, yeah. I mean, I’ve always thought… that you probably look really good… like that…”

  Madeline walked into her bedroom, where she had the blue suit draped across her bedspread. She ran her finger over the fabric. “It feels really nice, too.”

  “It… does?”

  “Yes. You can touch it tonight if you want. It feels so soft and silky. You’ll really like how it feels.”

  “Wow, Madeline… really?”

  “Yes. I’m touching it right now and it feels incredible.” Madeline pinched the collar of the suit and rubbed it between her fingers.

  Max laughed nervously. “Wow. Just… wow.”

  “Well, you know, it’s very high quality.”

  “Yeah! Oh, yeah, definitely!”

  Madeline picked up the suit jacket and held it in front of her, smiling at her reflection in the mirror. “Thanks for calling, Max… thanks for remembering my birthday. I can’t wait to see you tonight!”

  “Oh, yeah! I definitely can’t wait to see you!”

  Madeline disconnected. She’d never heard Max sound so excited before.

  As she spent a slow morning getting herself ready to go out, she answered three more calls, which all seemed to follow the same pattern. They wished her a happy birthday. Then they asked if she’d seen Anna’s e-mail. Did she really intend to be in her birthday suit for the party? Yes, she answered each time, that was her plan. She was puzzled by their reactions; all of them seemed very astonished that she would wear the suit for her party, and more than one complimented her on her daring.

  “It’s really not that daring,” she murmured, holding the suit up to the mirror. “It looks very professional, actually.”

  The phone rang again. It was Diane, her friend from college. Diane was already laughing when Madeline put her phone to her ear.

  “Diane!” Madeline said. “Now what’s so funny?”

  “I can’t believe this e-mail Anna sent! She says you’re going to your birthday party wearing nothing but your birthday suit? Madeline… that’s a joke, right?”

  “Now why is everyone so surprised that I’m going to wear this outfit?” Madeline burst out, shaking the suit in her hand. “If you just saw it… it’s the loveliest blue and it really is quite sharp!”

  “What is?” Diane asked.

  “This suit! The blue suit that Anna gave me for my birthday! It arrived at my front door just this morning!”

  Now Diane really started to laugh.

  “What’s so funny?” Madeline snapped irritably.

  Diane could barely stop laughing long enough to speak. “Anna’s e-mail!” she gasped. “She said you were going to the party in your birthday suit! But she only meant the suit that she gave you for your birthday!” Diane laughed merrily. “It’s so funny, Mads! No wonder everyone is asking about it!”

  “But I don’t understand?” Madeline was completely confused.

  Diane calmed down. “Madeline… have you really never heard the expression ‘birthday suit’ before?”

  “No…?”

  “It means naked! You know, like the ‘suit’ you were wearing on your first birthday? The day you were born?”

  Madeline could feel the color draining from her face. “That’s what birthday suit means?”

  “Yes! That’s why everyone is calling you to ask about it! They think you’re going to show up at the party naked!”

  “Oh my god.” Madeline sat on the bed. “People have been calling all morning. Everyone’s been asking about the birthday suit.”

  “And I suppose you’ve assured every one of them that Anna’s e-mail is the truth?”

  “Yes. Oh my god. I’m going to kill Anna.”

  “But it is funny, isn’t it?” Diane couldn’t stop giggling. “Birthday suit. Anna loves her pranks, doesn’t she?”

  “I’m sorry, Diane… I need to call her right away.”

  “Okay! Don’t be too upset, Mads. It’s just a bit of harmless fun.”

  But Madeline was most certainly upset. She ended the call with Diane and dialed Anna.

  Anna answered after the first ring. “Hi, Madeline!” she sang merrily

  “I’m so furious with you right now!” Madeline snapped.

  Anna burst out laughing. It took a moment before she could talk. “Have people been asking you about your birthday suit?”

  “Yes! All these phone calls, all morning, asking about your e-mail! And every single one, I’ve told them that I absolutely positively will be at the party in my ‘birthday suit’! Anna! I can’t believe you sent that e-mail!”

  “Well, it is true, isn’t it? You’re going to be there in that blue suit I bought you for your birthday. It’s just not the birthday suit that they’re expecting, but it IS a birthday suit.” Anna giggled. “Can you imagine how everyone’s going to feel when they see you tonight in your blue suit, and they realize they’ve been pranked? I can’t wait to see their expressions. It’s going to be a prank for the ages!”

  “No, it won’t,” Madeline replied coldly. “I’ll have no part in your little prank, Anna. This is my birthday party and these are my guests. I’m not going to use my party as an opportunity to play a trick on everyone.”

  “Oh, Mads, don’t be angry! It’s just a very small prank. No one really expects you to show up at your party naked. They’ll see you in your blue suit, everyone will have a little chuckle, and then we’ll get on with the evening.”

  “Of course they expect me to be at the party naked! Anna, I’ve been confirming all morning to every birthday well-wisher that I’ll be in my quote unquote birthday suit at the party. I’ve really left no doubt about it!”

  “Well, yes… I mean, that’s the prank, right?” Anna was becoming more subdued as she realized how seriously Madeline took this. “It’s just a different definition of birthday suit. So when you’ve been telling everyone you’ll be in your birthday suit, you’ve really been telling the truth, in a way…”

  “In a way?!?” Madeline was so upset. “Anna, I’m not going to trick everyone who’s coming to my birthday party! I’m not going to do that on my birthday!”

  “Madeline…” Anna sounded like she was finally realizing she had gone too far. “What are you saying? You can’t possibly be saying you intend to be naked at your birthday party?!?”

  “You haven’t left me much of a choice, have you?” Madeline snapped. “Goodbye, Anna.” Madeline disconnected the call without waiting for a response.

  She hurled the phone onto her bed. It bounced up next to her pillow and then started to ring, no doubt Anna trying to call again. Madeline didn’t even consider answering; she had to close her eyes and recall her yoga breathing exercises to calm herself down. Her hands were shaking with tension. She closed her eyes. Long breat
h in, long breath out. Calm energy.

  After a moment, she opened her eyes again. “Well,” she said, looking at herself in the bedroom mirror. “If I’m to do this thing, I ought to do it right.” She picked up her phone and found the number for the Lovely Lady Salon & Spa. “Hello? Petra?” she said when her call was answered. “Do you have any waxing appointments available in the afternoon? I’m afraid this is an emergency.”

  ***

  At first, Petra insisted that she was all booked. But after Madeline explained the situation, Petra told her she would move some appointments to make room. “Come in, come in, as fast as you can, my dear,” Petra soothed her over the phone. “You must look like that bride on her wedding day, yes? The one whose husband has not seen her undressed yet, so she must be perfect. Yes, we will make you perfect, I promise, my dear.” Petra seemed eager for the challenge.

  Madeline dropped in to the salon and Petra immediately rushed her into the back. Madeline put herself at the mercy of the wiry blonde woman. She surrendered all of her clothing and lay naked on a cushioned table while Petra waxed and plucked and tweezed her.

  “You must have no hair out of place,” Petra muttered in her Hungarian accent. “But you must also not show that this was done today. You must appear that this is the way you are, always.” Petra worked slowly and methodically, taking care to not leave any red marks.

  Afterwards, Madeline stood in front of the mirror, gazing at her naked body. “I’m going to feel so exposed, aren’t I?” she asked Petra. Her eyes lingered between her legs, an area now completely smooth except for a neatly groomed rectangle above her vulva. Madeline hadn’t realized how much of her sex would be visible.

  Petra shrugged. “Yes. But either you do this thing or you don’t. They will see your secrets, but that is the point, no?” The Hungarian gazed thoughtfully at Madeline’s body. “You may be wearing nothing, but that does not mean you must be plain. I will call a friend. She is a genius with an airbrush. She will add some glow to you, some red carpet glow.”

  Petra spent some time on her phone, and ten minutes later a woman with short black hair and tattooed arms appeared. The woman introduced herself as Krista. For the next half hour, Madeline stood with her arms up and out of the way while Krista and Petra crouched around her, applying make-up and body paint to her nude body. Krista had a lot of suggestions, and Madeline became more and more delighted at the possibilities. She was thrilled by the idea that she would be a living canvas for this art.