Unbreak Me

by Julieanne Lynch

  She sighed and sipped her coffee as she looked out of her window, taking in the beauty of the sun shining down on the little cluster of crystal chimes Aggie had placed outside the kitchen window. The luminous colors of the rainbow danced in through the window, making everything pretty and radiant. Another piece of Aggie firmly attached to the small apartment.

  Regina was busy stacking books on a shelf, smiling over at Molly. “You okay, honey?”

  “Yes,” Molly replied.

  Molly finished off her coffee and set the cup down before she began writing in her journal. It was a coping mechanism that Aggie had encouraged from the first day she had begun her long road to recovery.

  Molly had written in several over the past six years, but not once did she ever read through them. She firmly believed that if she read anything she’d penned, then it would be like opening up a can of worms, and Molly didn’t like worms—or snakes, or spiders, or anything that reminded her of the pain from her past.

  She sat at the kitchen table, biting on the tip of the pen before she closed her eyes. It was another ritual—silent prayer before she unleashed her thoughts onto paper.

  Saving someone’s life comes with a whole other level of responsibility. I had to stop, I mean, it was only natural to step in, but I didn’t realize I’d be seeing him again, or sleeping with him for that matter. Connor is everything I thought I’d never like, or want, or need. I know that sounds cold and harsh, as though I am judging him, but can two people—two very different people—truly find each other like we did and be happy?

  The way he made me feel, that is something I’ve never experienced in my entire life. Not when I was a child, and certainly not when I was a teen. He made me feel beautiful, but that also made me feel vulnerable. If I am to allow my heart to let him in, I am leaving myself in danger of being hurt, and I don’t know if I can handle being damaged—not like that.

  But everyone is right. If I don’t at least try, then what kind of life am I really going to have? I want to settle down. I want to have children—I want a home. Could Connor really be the one? Could he truly be that person who can salvage everything that I’ve lost?

  Dear God, if it’s him, please give me the strength to trust and believe. I could really use your guidance and love.

  Molly

  Closing the journal, Molly picked it up, placed it at the top of her bookshelf, deciding on a long soak in the tub before embarking on whatever would happen that afternoon.

  * * * *

  Dressed in a white fitted shirt and cutoff jeans, Molly slipped her feet into her silver flats as she brushed her hair.

  “Way too much,” she said, staring at her reflection. She decided on no makeup. She didn’t want to pretend to be something she wasn’t. So she settled for the less is more look.

  The slight knock at the front door caused a swarm of butterflies to begin their dance. She was nervous but knew it was only natural, considering how she practically threw him out earlier in the week.

  “I’ll get it,” she shouted to Regina, who peeped out from the kitchen.

  Pausing before she opened the door, she trembled as she inhaled deeply. You got this, she thought to herself as she reached for the handle and opened slowly.

  Connor’s face lit up when he saw her. “Hey.”

  “Hey there, yourself.”

  Moving out of the way, she let him in. As she closed the door, the familiar feeling of wanting to be lost in his arms scratched the surface, but she did well as she quashed the desire, replacing it with a more composed manner.

  “You look lovely,” Connor remarked as he stood with his hands in his pockets, looking more afraid than ever before.

  “Thank you. Not sure I scrub up as well as you, but this is me.”

  “Well, I think you’re beautiful,” he said as he gazed at her. “I figured a day at the beach would be a nice place to start.”

  Smiling, Molly looked at him, surprised. His gorgeous green eyes glistened as he watched her move over to where her purse sat “I’d really like that. It’s been a while.”

  “You ready?”

  “Sure… Should I make us up some food or something?”

  “Already taken care of.” He winked at her.

  As they were about to leave, Regina appeared, her dark eyes inspecting Connor.

  “Connor, this is Regina. She’s kinda like my surrogate mother,” Molly said. “Gina, this is Connor, my friend.”

  Regina walked down and shook his hand. “Good to meet you, Connor. Have you something nice planned today?”

  “A day at the beach,” he replied.

  “Molly sure loves the ocean,” she said, smiling. “Go have a wonderful time.”

  As they walked out of the door, Molly looked back, seeing Regina giving her the thumbs-up, winking at her. Giggling, Molly closed the door.

  Connor was already on course to woo her. Molly knew he was going to go all out for her, but never expected the things he had planned.

  Chapter Eleven

  With a heart that refused to stop galloping, Connor opened the passenger side of his black BMW convertible and smiled as he waited for Molly to get comfortable. God, she smelled good. A light floral scent swept through him, enticing him, tempting him to break his own promise and kiss her hard. Shaking the thought out of his head, he closed the door and walked around to his side.

  “Nice car,” she said as he slipped behind the steering wheel.

  “I like nice things,” he replied then instantly regretted sounding so materialistic. “Sorry, I meant—”

  Molly laughed and touched the back of his hand. “You’re so silly. I knew what you meant.”

  Letting out a sigh of relief, Connor started the ignition and drove. Soft music played from the stereo as they traveled down the 101, passing Bair Island and Redwood City on the way.

  The conversation was flowing and their awkwardness had been replaced by a newfound confidence.

  “I was such a dork at school. I swear, my mother made me stand out like a sore thumb—and the braces didn’t help.”

  “And there was me thinking you were the school hottie.” Molly giggled.

  “Are you serious?” Connor laughed. “I was a complete moron. God, I was this awful little shit. I had this complex about entitlement.”

  Molly gave him a curious glare.

  “I kid you not. Until I was fifteen, I was a complete ass. I’m the baby of the family, so, in a way, I was ruined from a young age. It wasn’t until I started dating, moving away from the circle of friends I associated with, that I realized that there was no way I could go through life walking on people, expecting others to pick my shit up after me.”

  Connor wanted to be honest. But he didn’t want to ruin the day by bringing up too much of the past. Bad memories were bad omens.

  “So what changed? I mean, your family is a big deal, right?” Molly asked.

  “Yes, they are.” He sighed. “Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had a privileged upbringing, but that meant love, or the kind of love a parent showers their child with, was missing. Instead of a kiss or hug, it was a new gadget or toy, or trip abroad. I missed out on a lot of things.”

  “That makes two of us,” Molly mused.

  Connor could tell from the way she had said that that there was a deeper understanding of how hard childhood could be. But he didn’t want to rock the boat too much and scare her off, or, even worse, be rejected again.

  “When I have kids, I’m gonna tell them every day how much I love them,” he said, his face lighting up at the prospect of being a father. “They’ll be sick of hearing it, but they’ll have felt love.”

  “You will make a great father one day.”

  Connor’s cheeks burned at hearing Molly’s compliment. As he glanced over at her, she smiled, just a little grin at first, but as it grew, it pressed her blushing cheeks upward. When the smile reached her eyes, they sparkled, causing them to crease at the corners. It was at that moment she became everything he had ever h
oped for. Molly was all he needed. “Why, thank you.” His own smile said it all.

  “Don’t mention it.”

  After a smooth ninety-minute drive, they reached Capitola, and Molly’s eyes lit up when she saw the ocean. They could see it from a mile away, looking like a giant azure mass. It was a rising enormity that seemed to obscure the horizon, which was lost in the shimmer of the far reaches of it. It was a sight that both Molly and Connor appreciated.

  “It’s been forever since I stood in the sand,” Molly remarked. She stared at the beauty ahead of her and glanced at Connor, smiling. “I feel like a child on Christmas morning.”

  Connor was content knowing that he’d made the right choice.

  “Ah, but this isn’t quite it.” He winked at her.

  “Connor, what have you done?”

  “You’ll see.”

  A nervous smile and arched brows told Connor that Molly wasn’t the type to take surprises very well. But he knew that she’d appreciate what he had in store for her. “Don’t look so worried. I’ve got this covered.”

  “O-kay.” Molly held her hands together tight, swallowing hard as she looked out of the window.

  Connor turned the car onto a small, steep slope, driving toward a private gated lane.

  “I thought we were going to the beach?” Molly asked, her eyes scanning the area.

  “We are.”

  The gate opened slowly, allowing Connor access to the well-maintained driveway. The garden was bursting with life with trees, flowers and a small fountain. Molly’s jaw dropped.

  “Are you sure?” she asked as she turned to face him.

  “Honestly, don’t worry about this,” Connor replied as he parked the car in the driveway, close to a two-story villa. “This is just private access, that’s all.”

  “To what?”

  “Follow me.”

  Getting out of the car, Connor stood by the hood and waited for an anxious Molly, who held on to her purse for dear life as she walked slowly over to him.

  Holding out his hand, he waited for her to take it before gesturing to continue his little mission. “Shall we?”

  “Do I have a choice?”

  “Molly, you always have a choice.”

  Molly squeezed his hand tight. She didn’t reply. Instead, they walked around to the side of the property, which led to a huge terraced garden. The view was impressive and the scent from the flowers and fruit trees was unbelievable.

  “Is this your house?”

  “Would it be a problem if it was?”

  “Well, no, but… It’s gorgeous.”

  Giving her hand a gentle tug, he pulled her in a little closer to him. “You’re gorgeous.”

  “You’re a dork.”

  They both laughed as Connor led her to some steps that took them down to a beach—a private beach that was beautiful, perfect and peaceful. Molly slipped off her shoes as she walked onto the warm sand and looked over at Connor who stood gazing at her, smiling.

  “We won’t be disturbed here,” Connor started. “And lunch has been taken care of.”

  “What have I done to deserve this, huh?” Molly winked at him playfully. “I’m joking. This is just lovely, thank you.”

  Molly turned to face him. She stood on her toes and kissed his cheek. Her warm smile mirrored his happiness. “You are most welcome,” he whispered. “Now come on, time to chill and soak up the sun.”

  Connor lifted Molly over his shoulder. She squealed, giggling as he marched across the sand, setting her down on a blanket that had been laid out especially for them.

  Connor wanted to make the right impression, and at that precise moment, he knew that Molly wasn’t the kind of woman to be bought, and he didn’t want that. There was more to her. She had an air of something about her that made him want to strip back the layers, healing any of the pain that still haunted her.

  “I could get used to this,” she whispered.

  “That could be arranged.”

  “Behave, you dork.” She hit him playfully. “But seriously, this is just heaven.” Cocking her head to the side, she looked over at Connor, who lay beside her, staring back at her. “Just don’t break my heart.”

  Molly ran her fingers over his cheek. Connor leaned in, kissing her softly. “I could say the same thing.”

  Chapter Twelve

  Molly couldn’t believe it. There wasn’t another soul on the beach, just the two of them, the sun kissing their skin and the sound of the waves lapping as they walked along the shoreline, talking, hugging and falling for each other.

  Walking hand in hand, Molly and Connor were lost in deep conversation. A gentle breeze blew Molly’s hair as she talked a little about herself. “I like giving back to the community. It helps me sleep a little better at night.”

  “But aren’t you be afraid of being alone with…them?”

  “Them?” Molly asked, raising her eyebrows. Molly had a thing about getting on the defensive when people dared to look down their noses on the weak and vulnerable.

  “The homeless… Not that I mean anything bad by saying that.”

  Molly stood still and sighed. Looking up at Connor, she could see that he was genuinely interested. “They pose no risk to me,” she said. “I’ve never felt exposed when in their company. They are no different than you or me. You wouldn’t believe some of the stories. Businessmen, kids, military veterans—they all lost something and ended up alone, solely depending on the grace of man.” She turned her face away, gazing out at the endless sea. “I was in their shoes once.”

  Connor’s expression said it all. He was stunned by her revelation. Molly defended her job by highlighting her own experience—it was proof that no one should be judged.

  “Wow… I wouldn’t have guessed.” Connor shook his head.

  “But how would you?” she asked. “You really don’t know anything about me, or what I’ve been through. Only what I’ve allowed you to see.”

  “Molly, I’m not about to let you disappear from my life because of your past. Remember, it was you who saved me more than once… You’re too special.” Pulling her by the arm, he gently coaxed her against his chest, embracing her in his warm arms. “You can tell me anything and I’ll still be standing here, falling for you.”

  “Are you sure about that? Because my story is dark.”

  Connor kissed her on the head and brushed his nose against her forehead. Molly could feel him inhale deeply.

  “You have my word.”

  Connor swept the hair back from her face and held on to her cheeks as he bent, kissing her gently at first. Their lips moved lightly together as they breathed in each other’s souls. Hard, yet soft. Heated with raw passion. A moment in their lives, lost in a memory that would last forever. In that one moment, there would be no going back, and it made their newfound feelings grow into something they had never believed possible.

  They stood still, holding on to each other. There was an explosion of total peace and tranquility, which besieged them both. Their worlds had come crashing together in the most unlikely of circumstances, and though a week had passed, they had come to understand the true meaning of life. The desire for love—to be loved. Knowing that for both of them, this may be the one time in their lives to prove that they were entitled to the freedom of falling in love, they grabbed it with both hands and refused to let it slip away.

  “I think I’m falling for you in a big way,” Connor whispered as he rubbed the tip of his nose against Molly’s.

  Molly gazed up into his green eyes, melting into him. How could she not? Connor had fast become the only man to ever get in under her skin. To see the vulnerable, yet strong woman hiding under those layers. She had exposed her very core to him and there was no turning back now.

  Molly took a quick glance around and smirked as she broke from their embrace. Lifting the white shirt over her head, she threw it aside before taking off her jeans, standing in front of Connor in her underwear.

  Molly knew Connor couldn’t hi
de his arousal. She loved taking control. Unhooking her bra, Molly dangled it midair before she threw it at him, laughing as he caught it mid-air, only for him to drop it onto the sand before pulling off his shirt, revealing his toned chest.

  Molly stood almost naked in front of him and enjoyed the risk of exposure, which was beginning to turn her on more than she thought it would.

  Connor dropped his slacks onto the sand, with only his briefs shielding his now-evident excitement. Molly smiled when she saw the desire burning in his eyes. Finally, after a little hesitation, she removed her panties, gazing over at him looking coy, yet sexy.

  “What are you doing to me?” Connor muttered as he too removed the last remaining piece of clothing. Both of them were naked, standing mere inches apart, staring as if they were only seeing each other for the first time. But before Connor could touch her, Molly turned her back on him and ran into the water, diving down into the warm crispness of the sea.

  Connor followed her in but stood waist high in the water, waiting for her to resurface. A smile spread across his face as her hand brushed against his thigh. His eyes glistened as she emerged from below the surface, her gaze intense. Grabbing him, Molly kissed him. She threaded her wet fingers through his hair, pressing her breasts against his chest.

  Connor didn’t waste any time in responding. Connor squeezed her breasts hard. Molly let out a little moan before gently biting into his shoulder, her breath ragged against him as her nipples hardened under his touch. Moving her hand down to cup his erection, she kissed him, sliding her tongue inside his mouth, letting him taste her desire. Connor moaned into her mouth as she began stroking him, making his hips jerk forward from the touch of her hand.

  Molly ached for him with a need she couldn’t quite get her head around. She let all her inhibitions go when she wrapped a leg around his waist, never breaking the momentum between strokes as Connor cupped her buttocks, supporting her.