Thor Is Locked in My Garage!

by Robert J. Harris

  They kicked off their skis next to the entrance. The gate itself was unlocked. Pushing it open, they came to an abrupt halt.

  Greg said sourly, “This is new.”

  The flat open turf of the football pitch had disappeared. In its place was a network of paths surrounded by high walls of murky green. The frozen path that stretched before them glistened like a sheet of glass.

  “A maze!” Susie exclaimed.

  Lewis turned to Thor. “Why would Loki go to the bother of making such a thing?”

  “Yeah,” said Greg. “If the signal’s a challenge like you said, why call us out, then put an obstacle course in our way?

  The god of thunder shrugged his broad shoulders. “It is another of his infernal games.”

  Susie shook herself like a football player coming off the bench to take the field. “Then let’s get in there and win it!”

  Lewis was still musing. “Why here?” he persisted. “What’s so special about the St Andrews United ground?”

  Susie paid no attention. “We’d better get a move on if we’re going to grab the treasure off him! Just give me a minute to get myself sorted.”

  Shrugging off her backpack, she sat down on the ground and hauled out a set of brightly polished ice-skating blades. She briskly slotted them into a set of grooves on the soles of her boots and secured them with metal clamps.

  “I had a notion these would come in handy,” she said.

  She glided out onto the ice-covered path and did a double pirouette.

  “That’s enough showing off, Spinny,” said Greg. “Don’t you skate off on your own and get lost.”

  “Mjolnir will be our guide,” Thor announced, “so I will go in front.”

  Susie slid aside to let him pass, then waved the brothers forward. Gripping each other by the shoulder, they shuffled forward, not daring to lift their feet from the ice.

  The path proved as slippery as it looked. Three steps from the entrance, Lewis’ feet almost shot out from under him and only Greg’s tight grasp kept him from a tumble. Twenty paces further on the path brought them to a T-junction. Clasping the haft of Mjolnir before him in both hands, Thor paused and shut his eyes.

  A moment later he opened them and pointed left. “That is the way we must go.”

  Each time they came to a branching path, Thor paused to choose the route. They were approaching a four-way crossing when there came a sudden rush of footsteps. A familiar figure in a fur coat and fedora hat flashed past in front of them, right through the crossroads.

  “Loki!” Greg and Lewis exclaimed together as the man in the hat vanished round a corner.

  Thor spat out an angry Nordic curse and launched himself after his enemy. In his warlike haste he lost his footing and went down with a heavy thud. As the god skidded helplessly across the ice on his belly, Greg and Lewis hurried forward to help him but slipped and fell right on top of him.

  “One side, you lot!” cried Susie. “Skater coming though!”

  She skated past them in a whoosh of cold air and swerved round the corner after Loki.

  “She can’t take on Loki by herself,” said Greg as he and Lewis struggled up and hoisted Thor to his feet.

  They took the same route Loki and Susie had, but almost at once they were faced with more choices. Every few metres a fresh path branched off.

  “This place is impossible,” said Greg.

  “But if there isn’t another treasure here,” said Lewis, “what is going on? Why is he leading us on this chase?”

  “Because he’s a Nordic nutcase,” said Greg. “This is his idea of a good time. Maybe if his mum had bought him an Xbox that would have kept him out of trouble.”

  “We must split up and block off as many routes as we can to make sure he doesn’t get away,” said Thor, laying a hand on his hammer. “Once we have him penned, I’ll take care of the rest.”

  “You’re right,” Greg agreed, “As soon as somebody gets hold of him, shout out and we’ll all come rushing.”

  “If we can find each other again,” said Lewis.

  “You should be a natural at this,” said Greg. “You’re always playing that Crabbyrinth game, the one with the giant crabs in the maze.”

  “I’ve not played that since I was seven,” Lewis objected.

  “It’s like riding a bike, though,” said Greg. “You don’t forget how it’s done.”

  “Good luck, boys,” said Thor as they cautiously let go of each other and set out along separate paths.

  Lewis carefully slid one foot forward then the other, all the while keeping one gloved hand pressed against the glassy wall of the maze. He was sure he had read that some mazes are easily solved, but he couldn’t remember if you were meant to always take the left hand or the right hand path. And then he wasn’t sure if that led you to the way out or to the centre.

  As he was pondering this, he realised he had come to a dead end. The ice was so smooth he could make out a distorted reflection of his own face in it, staring back at him as if challenging him to solve the puzzle. Why had Loki gone to all the trouble of creating this maze in the first place?

  He doubled back and took a left branch. There was a long stretch of path ahead of him now, so he moved carefully along it, hoping that it might lead somewhere.

  He was halfway down the path when he heard the slap of running feet on the slick surface behind him. He caught the barest glimpse of a figure in a fur coat before the running man bashed him aside with his elbow and sent him sprawling across the ice.

  Lewis lay there for a moment, cursing Loki and his tricks. Then he got onto his hands and knees and tried to stand.

  “Get down, Lewis!” cried a voice.

  It was Susie, racing towards him on her skates in pursuit of the fleeing man. She crouched forward for extra speed. Lewis dropped flat with a yelp as Susie leapt over him. The blades of her skates sliced the air above him, missing him by inches. She shot off down the passage and vanished round a corner.

  From far off he heard Thor bellow and guessed that he’d been knocked flat too. Loki was leading them all on a merry chase, though why he was bothering to do it was a mystery.

  The control Loki had over the winter weather allowed him to run across the ice without slipping while the rest of them floundered around as helpless as fish. It was then that Lewis recalled Loki wasn’t the only one with a magical treasure. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the Ring Draupnir. Removing the glove from his left hand, he slipped the ring onto his middle finger.

  All at once he knew – he just knew – the layout of the maze. It was as clear to him as if it were spread out on a computer screen. Actually, it wasn’t especially complicated, with many paths criss-crossing each other and only a few dead ends. He supposed that Loki must have been wary of getting lost in it himself.

  He was aware also of exactly where he was located, and everyone else as well. He could tell that Loki was bounding along confidently, never missing his footing on the ice. Susie was skating at high speed all around the maze searching for him. Thor was stomping along and falling flat on his face every third step. Greg was taking one tentative step after another while trying to look confident, as if anybody could see him.

  Lewis began to move purposefully. He had a picture in his mind of an intersection where, if he timed it right, he would be able to intercept Loki as he passed.

  He had a clear sense, almost like radar, that Loki was jogging down a passage to his right, on his way toward him. He tensed up all over and caught his breath as he reached the corner, ready to spring. He could hear the footfalls rushing closer, then there was his target, running past energetically as though out for a morning jog.

  Lewis flung himself forward, but lost his footing and went sprawling. Clutching desperately, he managed to catch hold of the hem of Loki’s fur coat as he went past. Clinging tightly, he was dragged along like a sledge being pulled by a team of huskies. Loki let out a wild laugh and hardly even slowed, so sure was his footing on the ice.
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br />   “I’ve got him!” Lewis shouted to the others.

  They swerved this way and that around tight bends, Lewis’ legs whipping behind him. Gradually Loki began to slow and Lewis could hear him fighting for breath.

  “Hang on, Lewis, I’ve got him in my sights!”

  It was Susie’s voice. Lewis looked up to see her racing towards him from the opposite direction. Loki skidded to a halt as she came flying at him on her skates and launched herself into the air. She threw herself at Loki, slamming him flat with Lewis trapped beneath.

  “Susie, take it easy!” Lewis gasped.

  “Sven! Greg! We’ve got him!” Susie yelled.

  She kept Loki pinned down while Lewis wriggled out from beneath the prisoner.

  There was an ear splitting crash as Thor smashed through the nearest ice wall with his hammer. Stepping over the frozen debris, he scowled down at his fellow god. “Now you pay the price for your misdeeds, Loki.”

  “You tell him, Sven,” said Greg, stepping through the hole behind him.

  The prisoner’s fedora had slipped over his face so that all they could see of it was a tuft of red beard. Thor crushed the crown of the hat in his powerful fingers and lifted it up.

  “By the beard of Odin!” he gasped when he saw the face beneath.

  The beard had slipped askew and when Lewis gave it a tug it came away easily. “That’s not Loki,” he said.

  “No,” said Susie excitedly, “it’s Garth Makepeace!”

  9. The Actor Factor

  “Garth Makepeace!” Lewis echoed. “What are you doing here?”

  “Makepeace?” said Thor. “Who is this Makepeace?”

  “You’ve been out on the rigs too long,” said Greg. “He’s one of Hollywood’s biggest stars.”

  “And me without my autograph book,” said Susie, getting up off the actor. “Sorry about the knock, Mr Makepeace, but you shouldn’t be running around in that disguise.”

  “Thanks for the tip, hotshot,” Makepeace wheezed. “I’ve got to say, that was pretty fancy stunt work.”

  Lewis tossed the false beard aside and stared at the man on the ground. “If he’s not Loki,” he wondered out loud, “how was he able to run on the ice like that?”

  “Because of these,” growled Thor, grabbing Makepeace by the ankles and yanking up his feet. “The Shoes of Vidar. They have the power of surefootedness.”

  The shoes looked like plain moccasins with leather laces, not like any sort of treasure at all.

  Makepeace caught his breath as Thor let his feet drop. “Larry told me he found them stashed away at the back of a shoe store,” he said. “They sure do grip.”

  Thor seized him by the lapels of his coat and pulled him upright. “Makepeace, what are you doing here?” he demanded.

  Makepeace chuckled. “Larry put me up to it. That guy is a riot! He makes cocktails you’ve never heard of. Have you ever tried a Red Rocket Root Beer?”

  “Mr Makepeace, you’re not explaining yourself very well,” said Lewis.

  “Call me Garth,” said Makepeace good-naturedly.

  He gently eased out of Thor’s grip and smiled. “You see, Larry and I were playing cards for dares, and I lost. Again! So the dare was that I’d come here dressed as him and fool people for as long as I could. I think my performance was pretty hot,” he added. “Worth a Golden Globe at least. Too bad I couldn’t keep it up, but I wasn’t expecting anybody to show up in skates.”

  “How did you get here?” asked Susie.

  “In my limo,” answered Makepeace. “My driver slipped and twisted his ankle, so we left him behind and Larry drove.”

  “What, through all this snow?” said Lewis.

  “It was a crazy ride!” Makepeace enthused. “The snow opened up in front of us like it was being held back by the cops. That Larry, he must be some kind of special effects wizard.”

  “Something like that,” said Greg.

  “Hand over the shoes, Makepeace,” Thor commanded, extending his hand. “They are the property of Asgard.”

  “Sure,” said Makepeace, slipping the shoes off and handing them over. “No need to get sore. Good thing I brought a pair of designer loafers with me.” From an inside pocket of his coat he pulled out a pair of expensive Italian shoes and slipped them on. “Now these have style,” he beamed.

  Thor tucked the Shoes of Vidar into his belt. “So Loki was never here,” he said. “It was all some sort of a trick.”

  “Yeah, what a goof!” Makepeace laughed. “Who are you guys, anyway?”

  “We’re Lewis and Greg McBride,” said Lewis. “You played golf with our dad.”

  “Say, that’s right,” said Makepeace. “Al McBride. He wanted me to sign up for some pro-am celebrity tournament in October.”

  “This is Susie,” said Greg. “And this is Sven. You could say he and Larry are cousins.”

  “Larry’s the black sheep of the family,” Thor added grimly.

  Makepeace cast an interested eye over him. “You know, pal, you look like you really work out. Have you ever thought of hiring yourself out as a personal trainer?”

  Thor ignored him and swung Mjolnir from side to side, scanning the area. “There are definitely no other treasures around here,” he said.

  Makepeace picked up the fedora Thor had discarded and clamped it on his head. “Say, could we go some place warmer? It’s like sitting inside a freezer here.”

  “It’s a long way back to your hotel, Mr Makepeace,” said Lewis.

  “No problem,” said Makepeace. “My limo’s heated and it’s parked right around the corner.”

  “A limo,” said Susie. “Cool!”

  “We still have to find a way out of this maze,” Greg pointed out.

  “I’ve got that covered,” said Lewis. He took off his glove and displayed the ring.

  “The data ring,” said Susie. “So that’s how you zeroed in on Garth.”

  Guided by the ring, Lewis led them all out of the football ground. By then his head was throbbing with the knowledge being fed into it. Once they were out in the street, he took the ring off and put it back in his pocket.

  “So you guys and Larry are all buddies, right?” said Makepeace. “That’s why he’s joking around with you.”

  “He is our bitter foe,” growled Thor, brandishing a clenched fist, “as are any who align with him.”

  “Hey, it was just a bit of fun,” said the actor, raising his hands defensively. “No need to start a war over it.”

  As Makepeace had said, there was a long silver car parked around the corner. Makepeace took out the key and pushed a button to unlock the doors. They had to dig away some of the snow before they could open them and get inside. Makepeace took the driver’s seat with Thor on the passenger side, while Greg, Lewis and Susie climbed in behind them.

  “It’s as big as a bus in here!” Susie declared.

  The floor was covered in plush carpeting and there was a state of the art entertainment system with a TV screen and speakers. Makepeace flicked on the heat and soon it was warm enough for everybody to take off their hats.

  “I’ve got a flask of hot coffee here,” said Makepeace, opening the glove compartment. “Just pass it around.”

  The coffee was so strong and sweet Lewis could hardly swallow it, but Greg and Susie took a couple of big gulps each.

  “I can’t get my head around this,” said Greg, handing back the flask. “Why would Loki send this guy here instead of coming himself?”

  “He wouldn’t,” said Lewis, “if there was a treasure hidden here. But there isn’t.”

  “Then what has all this running about been in aid of?” Susie wondered.

  Thor laid a fist on the dashboard. “Makepeace, what do you know about this?”

  “It’s like I said,” the star answered. “Larry wanted me to lead you on a chase. Like that scene in my movie Danger Agent, where I lead the killers down through the Paris sewers. We filmed that in a real sewer, you know. I was taking showers for a week.”r />
  “So Loki wanted to keep us occupied,” said Lewis, “while he was somewhere else.”

  “But where?” said Susie. “And why?”

  “Look, Sven says there’s a whole load of these treasures,” said Greg. “It’s bound to take Loki at least a couple of days to track them all down. So what good does it do him to have us tied up here for an hour or two?”

  “Maybe he’s not after them all,” said Lewis.

  “What do you mean?” said Thor, raising an eyebrow.

  “Well, it seems to me that he wasn’t that bothered about hanging on to the ring. He acted more like he wanted to get out of the cathedral and go somewhere else.”

  “I think Lewis is on to something,” said Greg. “Suppose Loki doesn’t want all the treasures. Suppose there’s only one he’s really trying to find.”

  “Ja, that could be right,” said Thor, rubbing his beard thoughtfully.

  “Sven, is one of the treasures more important than the others?” Lewis asked.

  Thor frowned. “That’s hard to say. They’re all so different from each other.”

  “What are you guys talking about?” Makepeace interrupted. “Is it some kind of movie script, like Searchers Of The Lost Temple?”

  “Quiet, Makepeace!” Thor ordered.

  The star went back to drinking his coffee in silence.

  “Let’s think it through logically,” said Lewis. “What does Loki want more than anything else?”

  “To annoy everybody and cause trouble?” Greg suggested.

  “More than that,” said Lewis. “Last time we ran into him, he’d conjured up a special day that gave him all his godlike powers back, and he was planning to make it last forever.”

  “Well, he can’t do that again,” said Greg. “We saw to that.”

  “But is there another way he could regain the powers of a god?” Lewis persisted.

  “Not even with all the treasures could he do that,” said Thor. “And in time the powers of the treasures again will fade.”

  “So how could he get back to being a god?” asked Lewis.

  “To do that,” said Thor, “he’d have to return to Asgard. But that is impossible since the Bifrost was destroyed. Without the Bifrost connecting Asgard to Earth, we are all cut off from the source of our power.”