Of Love

by Sean Michael

  Kent was buzzing, face pale as milk, eyes bruised.

  “It’s going to be okay,” Dex said again. Maybe if he said it enough, they would both believe it.

  “Uh-huh. Those are our babies,” Kent told him.

  Dex had to help Kent put his clothes on, and then he dragged the man out the door to the elevator. He held on, squeezing Kent’s hand. They had this.

  It felt like forever before the cab showed up but in reality was less than ten minutes. The trip to the hospital felt the same. The entire time Kent never said a word, eyes squeezed tight, pulse throbbing in his neck.

  “We’re here, sweet.” He paid the driver, and they got out, went into the hospital. “What floor is she on?”

  “Maternity. Three.”

  They took the stairs, and Elizabeth’s husband met them as they passed the elevator door, his face drawn. “They’re alive. All three. They’re in distress, but they’re all alive.”

  Dex grabbed Kent’s hand, squeezed tight. “See? I told you they were going to be okay.” He took a breath. “What does in distress mean?”

  “They’re running a bunch of tests. I’m worried about her. She swelled up.” Hank’s eyes filled with tears.

  Kent grabbed Hank and hugged him tight. “She’s going to be fine, damn it.”

  “They all are.” Dex nodded, making shit up because he had no idea if they were or not.

  “Can I see her?” Kent asked.

  Hank shook his head. “Not right now. She’s spread and naked.”

  Dex tried not to gag.

  “Can we get you some coffee or something, Hank?” Kent asked.

  “No. No, but I hear congratulations are in order?”

  Kent nodded, made an effort to smile.

  Dex took Kent’s hand again. “Today.”

  “That’s amazing. I’m so sorry to interrupt your honeymoon, but….” Hank waved his hand at their surroundings.

  “It’s okay. This was important. We wanted to be here. Needed to,” Dex said, realizing it was true.

  Kent nodded, holding his hand tight. “This is our family too, huh?”

  “Where should we wait?” Dex asked. He wished Hank had wanted coffee. He hated waiting around uselessly, and that would have given him and Kent something to do.

  “We…. Come on.” Hank headed down the hall.

  “The babies… are they going to be able to stay cooking?” Kent asked.

  “I don’t know, Kent. They don’t know anything yet,” Hank told them.

  Kent held onto Dex’s hand, thumb rubbing restlessly. Hank led them to a little waiting room that was currently empty, and Dex sat, pulling Kent down with him, keeping tight hold of Kent’s hand. God, this sucked. And there wasn’t a damn thing they could do to help.

  The doctor came out and went to Hank. “Mr. Rogers? She’s stabilized, but she’s going to be admitted. Her blood pressure is dangerously high.”

  Dex and Kent stood but hung back, letting the doctor talk to Hank. He knew they both wanted to know how the babies were, but it felt wrong to just blurt it out.

  “…all three babies are still safe now that her blood pressure is lower. The twins are surprisingly healthy and a good size. The other one has a low weight.”

  The babies weren’t all twins. Triplets—whatever it was called. Dex was learning something new every day. “Is that dangerous?” Dex asked, unable to keep his question in. He had no clue about babies and pregnancies.

  “If they’re all delivered now, the chances for complications for the smallest infant are high, yes. The boys are in good shape,” the doctor told them.

  Their little girl was in trouble. Dex clutched Kent’s hand, his heart beating hard in his chest. This was a terrible, terrible feeling.

  Kent squeezed his fingers. “What can we do?”

  Hank shook his head. “I don’t know. The kids….”

  “Can we arrange for a nanny or someone so you don’t have to worry about them while you’re here with Elizabeth?” Dex asked.

  “You’d do that?”

  Kent nodded. “We’re family, right? All of us?”

  “Yeah, you don’t want to have to worry about the rest of your family while Elizabeth is here,” Dex said.

  The expression on Hank’s face told him that was the right thing.

  “You are good guys. I’m glad the babies are going to have dads like you.”

  Dex wasn’t sure what to say to that, but he knew Kent deserved these babies and wanted them so badly, so he just nodded.

  “We’re going to be fabulous dads. Fabulous.” Kent had what Dex thought of as his brave face on.

  Dex took control. “We’ll go and set up the nanny. You have our number. Call it the minute you hear anything, okay? Anything at all, and we’ll be back first thing in the morning.”

  Hank nodded. “Sounds good.”

  “Do you have someone there with them now? My mom can probably spend the night,” Kent offered.

  Hank shook his head. “The neighbor is a good friend. She’s there with them.”

  “Okay. Okay, good. Tell Liz we love her and we’re praying, huh?” Kent looked like he was going to hurl.

  Hank nodded. “I will. I need to get back to her.”

  “Of course. Of course.” Dex tugged on Kent’s hand. “Come on. Let’s find the coffee shop in here first.” Then they could get to dealing with everything else.

  “I’m sorry,” Kent whispered.

  He blinked at Kent. “For what?”

  “Ruining everything.”

  He tugged Kent to stand near the wall so they were out of the way. “What did you ruin?” Kent was hardly responsible for what had happened to Elizabeth.

  “Our wedding night. Your life.” Kent was more than a little hysterical.

  “Just shut up. I know you’re not responsible for what’s going on here. Besides, our balls were about to fall off from overuse.”

  Kent looked at him, blinked, and then they both started to laugh together, cackling madly.

  He kissed Kent hard and rested their foreheads together once they’d stopped chortling. “It’s going to be okay. Okay?”

  “I’m scared.”

  “I know.” He was, too. Way more scared than when it was just about being a parent. Now he was scared he wasn’t going to get the chance to be one. “Come on. Coffee. Nanny for Elizabeth and Hank’s kids. Let’s keep busy.”

  “Right. I should tell the folks too.”

  “No. Wait until we have more news. You don’t want to worry them unnecessarily.” Especially in the middle of the night.

  “Yeah?”

  God, the last thing they needed was the kind of hysteria that would come from telling Kent’s family.

  “Yeah.” Dex nodded. And if they bitched about it later, he’d take the blame because it was his decision.

  He got them moving again, heading downstairs to where the coffee shop and stores would be. They’d get some flowers or something for Elizabeth while they were there. They were going to get through this. Together.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  KENT SPENT the next two weeks in an utter daze. He went from computer to house to hospital to computer to bed where he slept an hour and then got up and did it again. He’d forgotten how to smile.

  He grabbed dinner—a handful of candy corn and a Coke—and headed back in to work in the office—which was really just boxes and a computer. He’d sent Dex back to his old condo—they were renting both spaces out and Dex had his bed set up still—and Kent was just working.

  He didn’t know how long he’d been at it when he heard someone come in. “Kent? Sweet? I brought dinner.”

  “Dex?” Kent stood, swaying a little with exhaustion. “That you?”

  “Yeah.” Dex came in and wrapped around him. “Any news?”

  “Babies still cooking. The master is done, the master bath isn’t. I had candy corns for supper.”

  “That expression disturbs me,” Dex admitted. “The baby cooking one. And candy corns a
re not supper. Luckily, I brought real supper with me.”

  Kent could smell something now, maybe hot wings and onion rings. He sniffed. “Oh. Yum.”

  “Come on. There’s some pillows by the fireplace we can sit on.”

  Kent followed, completely on autopilot. Dex tugged him down and opened up the food containers, grabbing an onion ring and passing it beneath his nose.

  “Oh God.” Kent opened up.

  Dex popped it into his mouth. “Good?”

  “Uhn.” That was close to a yes, right?

  Dex chuckled. “You need a break, Kent.”

  “Uh-huh.” He pushed over to get a hug.

  Dex pulled Kent right into his lap and wrapped around him, giving him a gentle kiss.

  “No more working crazy hours.” Dex sounded insistent.

  “Huh?” He settled, needing this so bad.

  “It’s not like we need the money, love. You’re wearing yourself thin trying to keep busy and not have to think.”

  “I just… I’m scared.” Kent nuzzled in. “I don’t want to sleep apart anymore.”

  “We don’t have to. I never wanted to; you just seemed… like you wanted to be on your own.”

  “No. I… I feel like I’ve disrupted your whole life,” Kent admitted. Ruined things.

  “Kent… we’re married. I know things kind of blew up that night, but don’t you remember the vows? In sickness and in health, for richer and poorer, wherever your path might lead, I’ll walk it with you. I remember saying it.”

  “I meant every word.” Every word and more.

  “Then stop with the feeling like you’ve disrupted my life crap and trying to, I don’t know, stay out of my way? Jesus, that’s crazy. I want to be with you and support you, always, but especially when you really need it!”

  Kent met Dex’s gaze, needing to hear this right now, so much. “I really need you. Really.”

  “I’m right here. When we finish eating, I want you to power down your computer, and we’ll go to my place. You know we could move into the new house even though the master bathroom isn’t done yet. There are other bathrooms in the place. Several in fact.”

  “I…. Okay? What do you think is best for us?” Them. Both of them.

  “I think we should go see what’s up and move right into the master if we can. Get everything else moved in and set up. I don’t mind having to go down to one of the bathrooms on the second floor for now.”

  “I’d like that. To be home. Together.” He leaned into Dex, letting the steady strength support him. “I can pee anywhere.”

  “Not in the bed, you can’t.” Dex chuckled and kissed the top of his head, then fed him another onion ring.

  “Butthead.” Kent ate the onion ring, then another one, the food helping.

  “I’m going to love you into oblivion tonight, and I bet things look easier in the morning,” Dex informed him.

  “I bet sleeping with you tonight will make a huge difference.”

  “Of course it will. I’m like magical and shit.” Dex gave him a wink, clearly trying to keep the mood light.

  “You know it. And you snuggle like a champion.”

  “Thanks, sweet, that means a lot.” Dex pushed a wing at him. “More food. In you.”

  “Mmm. I love wings.” He ate slowly at first, then more eagerly as his belly welcomed the food.

  Dex looked more pleased the longer he ate, and when the wings and onion rings had been demolished, Dex grabbed the bag and pulled out another little container. “Two slices of chocolate mousse cake.”

  “Oh God….” He might have moaned.

  Chuckling, Dex opened the box and offered him a fork. “You deserve it; you ate all your dinner.”

  “I did. It was perfect. Thank you.”

  “That’s what I’m here for, hmm? Making things better.” Dex kissed him, then took a forkful of his own cake. “Oh, that’s good. Even if I shouldn’t. Maybe especially because I shouldn’t.”

  “You worry so much, love.”

  “I haven’t finished a race in the top five yet this year. I need to stay focused as much as I can.”

  “Is that my fault?” Was he ruining Dex’s career?

  “What? No! No, not your fault at all. I know how to focus, and I just haven’t been. I mean, it isn’t easy because you’re so sexy, but I do have willpower. I keep it in my back pocket.”

  “And all this time I thought that was your ass.”

  Dex started laughing. “Oh God. You always make me so happy.”

  “Do I? I want to. I totally want to be the best thing for you.”

  “You are, Kent. That’s why we got married and bought a house together and are having a family. Figures, though, that we threw them all in at once, eh?”

  “Yeah. Nothing halfway for us, huh?”

  “Nope. We jumped in with both feet. Hell, I’m blaming you for that—you wanted a kid and wound up with three. You’re the obvious overachiever.” Dex didn’t sound angry, though.

  “Totally. Always. Weird, huh? Find the perfect man, have the perfect babies.”

  “Oh, sweet, I’m not perfect,” Dex told him.

  Kent knew that. He also knew Dex was as close to it as anyone he’d met. In fact, Dex was better than perfect. Dex was his.

  Leaning toward him, Dex kissed him, rubbing their noses together when he was done.

  “I love you.” And that was that, wasn’t it?

  Dex nodded. “Good. I love you too.”

  “Can we go home?”

  “Please. My place tonight, but tomorrow, we’re hiring some guys to get everything we need into the house and tomorrow night that’s where we’re sleeping.”

  “Yes. Yes, please.” He nodded. “I’ll bring some clothes and my laptop.”

  “I mean it, I’m hiring movers for both our places. I’d rather be stumbling over boxes at our home than in our own little ivory towers.” Dex gave him a kiss. “Come on, get your stuff together.”

  “Yes, boss.” He grinned, winked, letting Dex know he was playing. He’d needed this. A direction.

  “Don’t you forget it.” Dex laughed and grabbed Kent’s backpack. “I’ll get your clothes?”

  “Please, love. Thank you.”

  “You got it.” Dex started throwing his clothes in the backpack, managing to stuff it rather full and putting his toiletries on top.

  Kent grabbed his watch, his laptop, his electronics, filling another bag. “Let’s get the stuff from the safe, love.”

  “Sure. Have you got room in your bag for it? This one is full, but I have all your drawers in here.”

  “I’ll just grab the inner box, huh?”

  “Sounds good.” Dex smiled. “Our marriage license is in there, isn’t it?”

  “Yes, love. My most important document.”

  “Yeah, mine too.” Dex gathered him up and kissed him, pushing everything else out of the way.

  Suddenly life seemed clearer, like he could handle this. Like it was real life.

  Dex’s fingers slid around his waist, holding on, keeping them together. They ended up grinning at each other, forehead to forehead.

  “Okay, sweet. Let’s go find our bed.” Dex gave him another kiss and grabbed his bags, leading him out.

  It was time to go.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  DEX HAD just started the running leg of his race when his phone went off, letting him know he’d received a text. The tone was Kent’s, who was waiting for him at the finish line, so he pulled his phone out, checking the text, and promptly stopped running.

  babies coming now

  Oh fuck. Oh fuck, oh fuck. He ran off the course, looking for the closest road that hadn’t been closed.

  He texted Kent. At Fourth and Bank. Come get me.

  on my way

  Oh fuck. Oh fuck. He paced about ten yards up the road, then turned and paced back, cooling down, his heart beating like it was trying to get out of his chest. He wasn’t convinced it was because of the exercise.

 
; Babies. Christ. The master bathroom was done, at least, and there were cribs and stuff, but…. Babies. He didn’t think he was ready. He didn’t know how to be a dad. Kent had a zillion books, and he’d read them all and practiced all the time on his nieces. He’d wanted this for ages.

  Dex had just come on board a little while ago. What if he was horrible at it? What if he broke them? Oh fuck.

  The urge to start running and not stop was huge. Huge.

  Kent pulled up, the man’s face the color of milk. Oh Jesus. Kent needed him.

  Dex took a breath—this he knew, this he could handle. He got Kent; he loved supporting the man, making him feel good. Climbing into the car, he gave Kent a hard kiss. “Thanks, sweet. Okay now. Let’s go get our babies.”

  “Yeah? We can do this, right? Together?”

  “Of course we can.” His own doubts had no place here. Besides, he totally had faith that Kent could do it, and he was going to do his dead level best not to screw anything up for his husband.

  “I’m so glad you’re with me. I… I wanted a family. I just didn’t realize that you were the biggest part of that.”

  Oh. Oh damn. Dex slid his hand onto Kent’s thigh and squeezed gently. “Thank you, Kent.” His voice was thick, and his belly was warm.

  “Love you, Dex.”

  “And I love you.” They were on the highway now, zooming toward the hospital. “Good thing we got the cribs set up in our bedroom on Wednesday.” They figured with three it made more sense for them to all be in the same room at night. They’d move them to the nursery on the second floor eventually.

  “Yeah. I think Danica is going to work out too.” Kent slowed down as the roads got busier.

  Danica was a lovely lady in her early fifties, and Kent’s mom was well on her way to becoming fast friends with her.

  “I guess we should let her know the babies are coming, eh?” he suggested. “So she knows we’ll need her really soon.”

  “Yeah. Yeah, once we know how they are.”

  “Yeah, okay. Does Hank know we’re coming?” Dex wanted to do something.

  “Yeah. Can you call Mom?”

  “Of course! Are you sure you don’t want the honors?” He knew Mom was going to be unbearably excited.