Dead Radiance

by Ayer, T. G.

  Easy? You mean that horrifically painful, mind-blowingly agonizing experience I had in front of Odin and the gathered Valkyries could have been worse?

  I shuddered and asked, "So what would've happened if I really didn't have her DNA in me at all? Would I still have become a Valkyrie?"

  "No. You would have died. The Mead and the pain would have killed you." Fenrir kept his voice flat, so matter of fact about the possibility of my death. "The only way you would have survived is to receive the Anointing of the Valkyrie. It is a rite in which Odin chooses the woman who will become a Valkyrie. The process is different from what you experienced."

  I wanted to gasp for breath, but I pushed the hysteria away, using my anger to claw it back out of my throat. I turned and met Sigrun's apologetic, sad eyes. I should have been angry with her, but she'd been my constant companion, teacher and friend. And her bright cheer had helped me get through this strange transition. Seeing her eyes flat and her smile gone hit me hard.

  "So I survived that test, and you think I'll survive this one too." I glared at the sword while I spoke to Fenrir.

  "Yes."

  I waited a moment, but he said no more.

  Well, I suppose one can't argue in the face of such confidence.

  I tugged the box closer and flitted my fingers over the seductive silk. The sword gleamed and glittered in the dancing firelight. I ignored the scabbard and slipped my fingers beneath the cool metal. I'd expected the sword to be heavy, but it felt as if it were a mere extension to my hand.

  "It's so light. And really well balanced."

  Three pent-up breaths released behind me. Fenrir broke the silence first. "It is your own strength that bears the sword. In fact, the sword itself is really heavy, even for a master swordsmith like Njall."

  Frowning, I remembered that Njall had grunted with effort as he released the box onto the table. I glanced at Njall, who nodded vigorously, meeting my gaze with glowing pride.

  "I guess I'm not dead yet." I faced the three of them, holding the sword flat on my palms. "So . . ."

  I didn't need to hear their answer. The fact that I was still alive, still healthy after touching the sword, meant one thing and one thing only.

  I really was the Great Valkyrie Brunhilde.

  Chapter 22

  Fenrir had this strange idea that my survival after touching Brunhilde's sword meant I now possessed all the knowledge, power and skill she'd had when she'd been alive. So the ferocity of his training session the next morning didn't surprise me.

  I struggled to catch my breath. We sparred alone on the empty field, and Fenrir kept me too busy to ask where everyone else had gone. Despite the inordinate amount of energy and strength I'd been awarded with since receiving my wings, Fenrir's onslaught of thrusts, parries and jabs left me pretty winded. Bruises purpled my arms below the armor, and my ribs ached from a stray shot he'd landed.

  "Now rest. I will be back." He patted my shoulder and walked off.

  Did that mean he was satisfied with my performance? Fat chance. I sat on the low wall of stones, drawing the breath back into my lungs, waiting for my thunderous heartbeat to return to something like normal. My stomach burned for lack of breakfast. My pre-training nerves had ruined my appetite, and Turi had hurried away after leaving my tray of fruits and breads. So there'd been no one to force or cajole me to break my fast.

  I regretted it now, as my stomach complained. Fenrir returned, a round shield in one hand, large enough to cover him from mid-thigh to chin, and painted with snaking, twisting emblems. He tossed it to me, giving me a split second to think about how to catch this much-too-large Frisbee.

  I snatched it from the air, holding onto opposite ends of the circle of wood. I'd heard the thwack-thwack of metal meeting wood during yesterday's and today's practices and now it made sense. Despite the shield's heavy, bulky appearance, it was light and easy to move around.

  "Let us try some defensive moves."

  Fenrir lowered his body, bending his knees to find his center of gravity. I'd learned to do that during yesterday's practice, after falling a good few times on my rear end. He swung his blade at me, and I deflected the shot easily. But although my instinctive reaction with the shield was a success, a wave of energy from the blow reverberated through the shield and all the way into my arm, right to my bones.

  Did I just hear my teeth rattle?

  We battled until my arm muscles ached and my hair clung to my face and neck in soggy clumps. At last, he called the end of the session. "You have the basics now. From tomorrow you will spar and practice with the rest of the Valkyries. As you get stronger and more skilled, you will progress to sparring with the Warriors."

  Interesting.

  I battled against stiffening muscles and limped toward the fence. The other Valkyries filed into the field from another practice area beyond the stone wall, and chatted as they moved around, collecting cloaks and cleaning muddy swords and shields. Fen walked off toward the chattering group.

  My ears still rang from the thwack of Fenrir's sword on my shield, so I didn't hear the Valkyrie approach until her voice startled me. "Sigrun says it will not be long before you can go on a Retrieval." Her voice held a bitter edge, and I knew it was Astrid before I turned. The nerve of her, especially after trying to kill me just yesterday! Her eyes rested on the amber pendant. Eyes filled with venom and a strange satisfaction.

  "I guess it's up to Fenrir to decide if I'm ready," I replied.

  She laughed, her eyes cold and mocking. "No, Brynhildr. It is up to Odin to decide when you are ready." She trailed her eyes up and down my body, from helmet to flushed cheeks, armor to bruises. "I am not so sure you are good enough to qualify. Not yet."

  I wished I'd just kept my mouth shut. I'd just given her the means and opportunity to mock my lack of knowledge of the correct procedure. I almost sighed with relief when Fenrir strode back and interrupted us. Almost.

  "She is ready for a Retrieval. Perhaps not for full battle, but Retrievals are simple enough," Fenrir growled, reminding me who and what he really was.

  "But does she not need an Ulfr?"

  "She will need one, but we have not had sufficient time to find Bryn a suitable Ulfr partner," Fenrir replied, the tension in his voice coming off him in waves. When did I develop the ability to read his moods? "Therefore I will be Bryn's Ulfr for this Retrieval."

  Astrid laughed. A bitter, cackling sound that hurt my ears. She gestured toward a bruise on my arm. "This is what you call 'ready for Retrieval'? I see we have lowered our standards. I think I shall be speaking to Freya about this fiasco. I wonder what she will say."

  She turned her back on us and stormed off before either Fenrir or I could answer her.

  "So when do I get my Ulfr?" I raised a questioning brow.

  Fenrir drew his eyes from Astrid's retreating back, clearly distracted. "A Valkyrie rides to Retrieval with a wolf. And they are meant to be a hunting pair. Since we haven't reached that stage of your training, I will substitute for your Ulfr until we get you paired up with one. Of course, Odin may feel you are not ready yet anyway, so let us wait until he makes a decision."

  "And what did she mean about Freya?" I threw a dark glare at the disappearing figure of Astrid.

  "The goddess Freya is due to arrive in Asgard soon. She comes to collect her share of the Warriors you gather."

  "That doesn't sound fair. How does Odin feel about that?"

  Fenrir laughed. "It is their agreement. They are both readying their armies for the Great War. And Freya is the General of the Valkyrie regiment as well. The agreement was they would both share the Warriors equally. Every three moons Freya arrives to meet with Odin. Sometimes there is a family gathering with all the gods. But in the end, half the new batch of Warriors will leave with Freya."

  "When is she meant to arrive?"

  "In a fortnight, on the night of the full moon. Let us hope your Retrieval is completed soon, for then you can concentrate on practicing your skills on the field. Freya h
as no patience for those who do not work hard and work as a team."

  "When do you think Odin will decide?" I asked.

  "Be ready this night after the evening meal. I will speak to Odin now, and if he requests your presence it will be after the meal is over." With that, Fenrir walked away without even a farewell. It would be a while before I got used to his surliness.

  ***

  I'd missed Sigrun that morning on the fields, but dared not ask where she was. I didn't want to appear too reliant on her. She didn't make it to the Bathhouse either, but I spotted her as I entered the dining hall. She'd kept a place for me. I sat, smiled at the meal she'd already fetched for me, then wolfed down fresh baked bread and succulent meat.

  "Odin will see you after dinner." Sigrun drew closer to whisper the words into my ear. Startled, I opened my mouth to reply. But she shushed me. This wasn't something to be discussed where we could be overheard.

  The rest of the meal passed uneventfully. Astrid stayed away but sent a volley of dagger-like stares at me, which I ignored. I refused to allow her to get to me. It was as if I'd escaped Cherise and North Wood High only to be faced with the same problems, just with different faces.

  Sigrun walked me to the Great Hall and promised to wait for me.

  ***

  I slipped into the expansive space, which could easily have housed the entire school of North Wood High. At the dais, I knelt. Odin sat on his throne in silence. His presence, his power, wound around me, an almost palpable thing. Remembering Sigrun's words of caution at lunch, I kept my head bowed. Silence enveloped me as I waited.

  "Rise, Brynhildr." I swallowed my sigh of relief and stood. "Fenrir has told me many good things about your progress, child. He thinks you are ready for a Retrieval. And I agree."

  "Thank you, my Lord."

  "And you will be happy for Fenrir to be your Ulfr?" When I nodded, he said, "Then it is done. We will speak to the scouts and decide on a location."

  Happiness rose within me, filling me with hope. I would be returning to the world I'd been born in. Would I be able to take a small detour to see Ms. Custer? Did I dare make such a personal request to the all-powerful Odin? "I, um . . . would it . . . ?" I stumbled over my words.

  "Come, Brynhildr, there is no need to be afraid to speak." This new voice was soft, like warm honey on my skin. In fact, I could smell and taste the sweetness as her voice echoed around the hall. Frigga sat beside her husband. I could have sworn she hadn't been there when I'd arrived.

  I bowed, extremely ashamed of my rudeness. She was a goddess for heaven's sake, and I'd just disrespected her. "I'm so sorry, my Lady. Please forgive me."

  Odin laughed, and I risked a glance upward. His single eye twinkled with mirth. "Oh, do not apologize, child. My wife is fond of appearing within the hall amidst a conversation."

  "Dear, leave the child alone and let her speak," said Frigga.

  "As you wish, my fair wife," Odin replied, a cheeky grin on his face.

  "I was taken from my home without telling my . . . mother that I was safe and well." I hesitated, unsure if I was overstepping any boundaries or pushing my luck by making such an audacious request. "Could I return to see her and say goodbye? Just to let her know I am well and not in any danger."

  Frigga nodded her dark head, but Odin remained silent. "I think it is possible. What say you, husband?" She looked at the silent god, who merely grunted.

  I waited, fingers crossed at my back.

  After what seemed like ages, he said, "Very well, Brynhildr. And do not forget this boon. It is not something I grant often."

  "Thank you, my Lord." I was so grateful, I didn't think to ask how this would go down.

  He waved me off and I retreated slowly, filled with the pleasure of such thrilling news. I'd been granted the one wish I'd had since I arrived.

  I was going back home to see my foster mom.

  ***

  I left the hall, still slightly shocked my request had even been entertained. And more than happy it'd been approved.

  "How did it go?" Sigrun whispered urgently as we headed for our rooms.

  "Odin approved my Retrieval. But he didn't say when or where."

  I said nothing to Sigrun about my bold request, thinking I'd better keep it to myself for now. I hadn't thought to clarify the hows and whens of meeting Ms. Custer, so decided it would be safer to wait until I knew where the Retrieval would take place.

  The whole concept of Retrieval fascinated me. Keen to know more, I asked Sigrun, "What happens now?"

  "Well, the scouts will tell Fenrir the general locations of the next batch of Warriors. Then he will gather a group of Valkyries and go to fetch them."

  "How do they know where to go?"

  "The scouts are Valkyries who visit Midgard for periods of time. They travel through countries looking for the ones who glow. In the old days, it used to be easy. Valor was more common among man. It was not difficult to pass through a battlefield after the fighting was done and just pick up the courageous dead. Today, valor and courage are hard to find. People are fickle, angry, resentful and selfish. It stops them from having courage and fighting for something larger than oneself."

  I considered her words. Such sentiments would send social networks spinning with bitter responses. Nobody liked to have their failings pointed out, but Sigrun was right. In many respects, people had become more fickle, less likely to take a stand for what they believed in.

  "Okay," I said, "so once they know who the Warriors are the scouts come to Asgard, reveal their locations and the Valkyries go to fetch them. How is it done? Do we bring them back to life?"

  "No. We just carry them to Valhalla. Once the bodies arrive there, they recover with the Mead and regain their strength. When they are ready they begin to train and await Freya's visit."

  "And when do you think we'll have the next Retrieval?" I was eager to get on with my mission.

  "I suspect it will be soon. Fenrir is preparing and I think the scouts came back today." I wondered if that was the reason Fenrir had been so adamant that I was ready for a Retrieval. Because he knew the Valkyries would be going again soon? Sigrun continued, "You do need to get some rest. Your first Retrieval will not be easy."

  I stopped at my door and was about to enter when I remembered Turi."Sigrun, wait."

  "Mmhh?" She paused and turned. Firelight flickered from the torches dotting the passageway. Cold fingers of night air crept through the halls and my warm room beckoned.

  "Turi? My . . . helper?" I couldn't bring myself to say the words maid or servant. "What is she?"

  "What do you mean?"

  "Sigrun, she has a tail!" My voice pitched a little too high.

  "Oh, yes. I should have told you earlier." She smiled and shook her head. "Turi is a Huldra, a forest sprite. On Earth they are full of mischief, but the ones who make it to Asgard are happy to serve Odin."

  "Are they servants?"

  "Yes and no. They work because they want to. We cannot make them do anything. And we cannot stop their naughty ways either."

  I frowned. "What do you mean?"

  Sigrun blushed, trying to find the right words. "Huldra are . . . they . . . they like the men."

  "Ah, I see." I suppressed a giggle. For all her years of life, Sigrun was still shy. She nodded farewell. "Goodnight," I said.

  That night I was too anxious to sleep. I tossed and turned, searching in vain for a comfortable position, what with the wings constantly getting in the way. The fire crackled noisily and threw leaping shadows along the wall. Even the furs on the bed were too warm. I stared off into the dark corners. There were too many questions of how I would fit my visit in with the Retrieval.

  ***

  The next morning, Fenrir collected all the Valkyries and confirmed Sigrun's suspicions. The scouts had arrived the previous night, providing the location of at least twenty-five Warriors. Fenrir didn't waste any time, quickly naming those Valkyries who would go and herding them off to the deserted dining hall to dis
cuss the details.

  A thrill ran through me when he called my name. He left Astrid off the list, which sent sparks of satisfaction and relief through me. Her scowl and cold sneer proclaimed her feelings, but nobody paid her any attention.

  In the dining hall I sat with Sigrun, listening to Fenrir read from a list of international locations. Dartmoor, Cape Town, Brisbane, Bangladesh, Toulouse. I'd never actually thought about where Asgard's Warriors would come from, but the multinational list came as a surprise.

  Only when the name Craven came up did I pay closer attention. Fen's process was to call out the name of the town, the name of the dead Warrior and then the name of the Valkyrie assigned to that Retrieval. I wasn't surprised when he named Aimee Graham, Joshua O'Connell and Brody Stevens. What was strange was how he allocated four Valkyries to the town and not three. I just assumed I was along for the ride, as he didn't link me with any of the other dead Warriors. My shoulders sagged with disappointment, but I still felt thankful I'd get to go.

  A surge of emotion swept through me. Three people who'd meant so much to me would soon be in Asgard. With me. I'd barely known Aimee, but she'd played a significant part in my understanding of what the glow meant. Now they would all get a second chance.

  We were scheduled to head out as soon as all the Valkyries and Ulfr gathered their stuff together. As everyone was already dressed for the battlefield in full training gear, we followed Fenrir to the palace.

  At first, I thought he was leading us to Odin's Hall, but he soon took a passage before the hall and entered a different room. A large, open fire occupied the center of the room, throwing comforting warmth around us. The number of people who'd arrived startled me. Each Valkyrie paired off with one other man or woman, leaving only me and Fenrir unmatched.

  Slowly, each pair held hands and flicked out of existence.