Dead Radiance

by Ayer, T. G.

  Just like that. A blink and they were gone.

  Very soon, Fenrir and I were the last two left.

  "Do not be nervous," he said. "Clear your mind and think of Craven or a person in the town you want to see. We shall be in Craven before you know it." A smile laced Fen's voice and at once I understood. Perhaps I wasn't allocated a Warrior because of my request to Odin and Frigga.

  I felt the slight twist of disappointment, but I shook it off. I was going to see my foster mom, which was the only thing that mattered.

  Chapter 23

  No strange burst of light or sparks of fire or thunderclaps heralded our arrival in Craven. One moment we were beside the great fire in Asgard and the next, Fenrir and I appeared beside Sigrun and the rest of the Craven contingent. Apart from a few short seconds of mild nausea, I remained unaffected. I recognized the area. An abandoned stretch of land behind the Craven Cemetery. Appropriate.

  The Valkyries' chain armor gleamed in the murky light of a distant lamp, one of those fake lamps along the curved pathway that bisected the cemetery, made to look old but lit by a modern electric bulb. The Ulfr, still in full human form, were resplendent in red-bronze body armor.

  We made a magnificent sight, but nobody would be able to see us. We came in the night, to retrieve our charges. We would leave in the darkness too, unbeknownst to parents and friends and family of the deceased. People who would never know the glory of what their sons and daughters would soon become. Once life was breathed into the chosen Warriors, they would rise to fight for Odin and Freya, to win the Great War and save the world from eternal destruction.

  Craven itself hardly looked worthy of such greatness. It was just as unremarkable as always. The only difference from when I left was the weather. It was colder now; a blustery wind chased around the last of the autumn leaves. The sky hung low, dark and heavy, promising snow. I eyed the other Valkyries and their Ulfr, wishing I could go with them to see my friends saved.

  A glance over the fence and a stone angel caught my eye, watching like a sentinel over a child's grave. It sent a little shudder crawling down my spine. What would the procedure be? Would they dig up the caskets and remove the bodies? I shivered; the thought of it was detestable. And wrong. Did the end really justify the means of Retrieval?

  The others moved away, disappearing through the darkness of the trees, their minds already concentrating on the task they faced. For the briefest second, the Ulfr shimmered, shadows veiling them, until they resembled wolves. I blinked, and they were gone before I could get a second look.

  In the very next breath, a symphony of howls ripped the silent night air apart, and I shivered despite my warm cloak.

  Beside me, Fen's eyes glittered in the bland light. I hadn't yet seen an Ulfr up close and personal, but I knew they were responsible for those blood-chilling howls. And Fen's blood was answering to the call of his kin.

  "Fenrir?" I would have placed an arm on his shoulder if he hadn't moved away. Not the smartest thing to do. He shook his arms out, as if the simple action would clear the calling from his blood.

  "Come. We do not have much time." Back to business.

  We hurried through the darkened streets, arriving at Ms. Custer's house with preternatural speed. At the front door, Fenrir paused and said, "Go. I will stand guard. I'll warn you if there is danger or if we run out of time." Arms folded, he leaned against the wall beside the bell, beyond the circle of brightness from the porch light. The shadows swallowed him. I squinted to try to see him.

  "Go!"

  I jumped at his whispered growl, redirected my attention to the door.

  White paint peeled from the deeper grooves of the paneling. It still needed a new coat of paint, but I had always liked it just the way it was. It had character. My fingers brushed the frame and released a small cloud of paint flecks, and I smiled. More character. I peered through the drapes beside the door. The lights were on inside, but it was quiet. My heart thumped against my ribs as I stabbed the bell, hoping I wouldn't scare the living daylights out of Ms. Custer with my Valkyrie getup.

  Looking down to smooth the chainmail along my neckline, I gasped. My armor and headpiece were gone, replaced by the jeans and jacket I'd worn when I'd last stood outside this house. To the eye, I looked like an ordinary teenager. But when I touched my clothing, my fingers brushed armor.

  A grunt came from the shadows. "It is an illusion. You do not want to frighten your mother do you?"

  I didn't answer because at that moment the door opened, and it would've frightened my foster mom if she found me on the veranda having a conversation with the cold night air.

  I'm not sure how I'd expected Ms. Custer to react, but the bear hug she pulled me into was enough to make me want to sob into her shoulder. Her warm, comforting body smelled of fabric softener and fried chicken and home. She held me as if she thought I'd disappear again if she let go. When she finally released me, her eyes were filled with tears and her cheeks were moist. And I found I'd shared her tears. Mine were perhaps more along the vein of self-pity, though.

  "Come inside, baby. Before anyone sees you," Ms. Custer whispered.

  She hustled me inside, her eyes darting up and down the street as she shut the door. Dragging the drapes closed, she pulled me onto the couch beside her, her hands wrapping around mine again. The house was silent; only the kettle hummed in the kitchen.

  "What happened, child? Where'd you go? I knew you'd leave but you didn't say goodbye and then Aidan called last week to say he'd come see me and that he was worried about me and you and so sorry about what happened. But he never came and I haven't heard from him since his call. Have you been with Aidan?"

  Ms. Custer stopped talking so suddenly I thought she would burst into tears again, and I hated myself for hurting her, for worrying her. Above all, I hated Aidan for giving her false hope and for making her wait and not turning up. Damn that guy. He'd won all our hearts, and what does he do in the end? Fling our hearts back into our faces without so much as a goodbye.

  "I'm so sorry, Mom. I would've contacted you if I could have."

  "I know, honey. You must have been worried our phones were tapped or something." She looked over her shoulder as if expecting one of Aidan's goons to be standing there.

  My heart sank. All this craziness had made her suspicious, made her lose the comfort and security in her life. I ached to find a way to make all of this go away. To give her back the luxury of certainty. I couldn't change the past, but I did know one way to make her feel better.

  I gripped her warm fingers in mine. "I have something to tell you and I don't have much time," I said. Then I paused, staring at our entwined fingers, hers tanned brown and mine pale. Hers still comforting and supporting. Mine still thin and needing her. I hesitated, not sure how to proceed.

  "What is it, child?" She leaned closer to me, trying to see my face.

  "I didn't run away. I was taken."

  Her cheeks darkened, her fingers squeezing hard. "I knew it. Those goddamned thugs. I should have known it was them." Ms. Custer launched herself out of the couch, giving vent to her anger the best way she knew how. By pacing.

  "No. No, it wasn't them. . . ." I rose to my feet. The pacing had touched something inside me. The hysteria I'd tamped down all these days now welled up inside my brain. "In fact, it's something entirely different," I told her. "I don't think you'll believe me, but I'll tell you anyway, and you can feel free to kick me out if you wish. But I hope you don't."

  I smiled as she paused in her pacing, and our eyes met. I prayed this was the right decision and I was not about to jeopardize our safety. "I was taken away, to a place that shouldn't even exist. I'm not sure how to tell you this." Again I paused. Telling her about Asgard was difficult. To be honest I still barely believed it myself.

  "Take it by the horns, child. Deep breath and get it out." She sat me back down and squashed me in a half embrace.

  "You know how you spoke to me about my eating habits, and you thought I was eating
somewhere else?"

  She nodded, concern flaring in her eyes. "You're anorexic. I knew it!"

  "No. I'm not anorexic, but at the time I didn't know what it was. It wasn't only the eating. I hadn't been drinking much either, or sleeping much at all. And I was getting stronger. But now I know why. My body was changing, adapting."

  My hands trembled as I told Ms. Custer how I'd been seeing the auras around people since I was a little kid. I skimmed over my run-ins with the psychiatrist and explained how I realized Joshua was going to die after I'd seen the glow on Aimee. "When I saw Brody glow I couldn't take it, I told Aidan about it. He said he'd help but . . ." My voice trailed off. The less said about Aidan, the better. "When I disappeared I was taken to this place . . . and I became something else."

  Ms. Custer pursed her lips. "Stop this ridiculous nonsense, child. Next you're gonna say you're a vampire or something." She and I both knew she was joking but a smidgen of fear glinted in her eyes. It tripped up my courage. What if she thought I'd just gone crazy?

  I laughed, tamping down my fear. "No. Not a vampire. I'm a Valkyrie."

  Her arm fell away and she just stared at my face, her mouth half-open. My heart plunged. I contemplated taking it all back, pretending I'd just been kidding all along. But I couldn’t back out now. Taking a deep breath I said, "I was taken to Asgard. That's where I got my wings. I've been training, and when I knew I'd be coming to Craven, I asked if I could see you. It's why I don't have much time."

  Would I even need more time? The look on her face said she was more likely to toss me out on my behind than believe me.

  "I know it's hard to believe," I said. Then I remembered Fen hiding in the shadows. Before I'd figured out a plan I was on my feet and pulling the door open, whispering to the shadows, "Fenrir, how do I show her my wings?"

  Fen growled. "You want to do what? Have you lost your senses?"

  "Is somebody out there, Bryn?" Ms. Custer's voice floated to me. Although concerned, she still gave me privacy.

  "How?" I whispered insistently through gritted teeth.

  "Just believe."

  "What?" That was the most ridiculous thing I'd heard.

  "Tell her and she will see," Fenrir said. "And be quick. We still have your Retrieval to complete."

  I stared at the shadows. What Retrieval? He hadn't read out a name. I opened my mouth to ask him about it, then clenched it shut. Time to think about that later. Ms. Custer was waiting inside.

  I shut the door but didn't return to the living room. By the door was probably the best place to be in case she came at me with her broom. Best place to make a quick getaway. "Bryn?" Her footsteps padded across the floor and she squinted at me.

  "Mom, I'm a Valkyrie," I said. "From the Norse legends. The women with the wings who take the dead Warriors to Valhalla. Look at me. Closely." I stared at her, willing her to see me in my true form. Not knowing if it would work at all.

  When her eyes widened, darkening from rich brown to deep black, I suspected trouble. She stepped closer, and then the door was at my back. Maybe this had not been such a good idea.

  "Oh my Lord. Oh my Lord," she whispered over and over, almost under her breath, like a prayer. Her eyes ran over me, head to toe then toe to head and back again. She reached out and touched my chest where the chain armor lay curved to my body. Her fingers traced the threaded links.

  She gaped at the armor, the helmet, my face. When her eyes rounded even further, I knew she'd seen my wings. She gasped and whispered. "Let me see." I turned around, allowing her to examine them. They fluttered in tandem with my nerves.

  "Now you see?" I said. "This is what I've been trying to tell you. It's what Aidan knew, too." I turned back to face her.

  "Is that why they were looking for you? Did he tell them?" Her eyes hardened, still harboring a deep hatred for the thugs.

  "No, I don't think so. But he was sent here to find me." His betrayal still tore at my heart. "The book they were looking for had a bunch of information on my father and the experiments he was involved in."

  "Experiments?" Ms. Custer's eyebrows shot up.

  "About eighteen years ago a burial site was uncovered in Sweden. When they examined the grave, they found wings like mine, something they were unable to explain. Some of the archaeologists swore they'd found a Valkyrie and took samples of the DNA to verify it. My father was the head geneticist. He performed the DNA tests and told them it was normal human DNA."

  "And he lied?"

  "Yes. He knew what he had. My mother was on the clinic list for IVF, and he spliced the DNA with her fertilized embryos. The Valkyrie DNA took over. When I was taken to Asgard, I had to go through a process, like a transformation, where my wings grew. I wouldn't have received my wings at all if I weren't a real Valkyrie."

  "So who took you to . . . Asgard?"

  "A Valkyrie who was sent to fetch me." I smiled, needing to reassure her that everything was okay. "Her name is Sigrun. I wish you could meet her, but she's busy, on a mission right now. There's something else I wanted to tell you. It's Brody."

  "What about him? Did they take him? Oh heavens, they took him?" Grief filled her face again. Instantly she looked twenty years older, the lines of her face deeper, more pronounced.

  "Yes, they did take him. The golden aura was a sign, telling me I was looking at a Warrior of Valhalla. Only a Valkyrie can see the golden glows. He's safe and well, and he'll live forever as a Warrior in Valhalla."

  I didn't want to tell her about Freya and her demands or the impending war. It didn't seem fair to heap sadness on her when she'd been given good news. Her little smile confirmed I'd made the right decision.

  "Will you see him?" She searched my eyes, desperate for an affirmative answer.

  "I'll try my best." And I meant it. One of the first things I planned to do when I returned to Asgard was to find Brody.

  "Good. You must give him our love. Will you come back and visit?" She patted my hand. She seemed to sense that my time was up. Thankfully, I wouldn't have to drag myself away.

  "I'm not sure," I said, shaking my head, deep sadness moistening my eyes. "Just one thing. If Aidan ever calls you or visits, tell him I'm gone forever. Just make sure he never comes back. I wish he'd never come here in the first place."

  "Perhaps it was fate?" Ms. Custer said, but I knew she was only being kind.

  "No. He was sent here to check if I was a Valkyrie." I grimaced. "Our fathers were partners at a genetic science center. His dad wanted to eliminate me. Aidan told him I wasn't a Valkyrie. That the experiment had been a failure. But none of them know what they're in for."

  Poor Ms. Custer. So much for her to process. The dazed look in her eyes told me I'd overwhelmed her. But she threw her shoulders back and drew me into her arms, wings, armor and all. "You go, honey. Do what you have to, and be safe."

  Our farewell was quick, and I got the sense she would head upstairs to her bedroom and have a good cry. I sighed. At least she knew that Brody and I were safe.

  I stepped through the doorway and waited for the lock to click.

  "Let's go," I said to the shadows.

  Chapter 24

  We walked into the dark night. Behind us, the lights went out in Ms. Custer's house. I held back heated tears, unsure if I'd ever see her or Izzy or Simon again. My foster family had been ripped asunder, and I stood helpless in the middle of the turmoil.

  Looking back, maybe for the last time, I studied the porch and the swing, trying to etch them into my memory. Trying to ensure I'd never forget where I came from. Where I'd sat hidden behind the rose bush, eating up Aidan with my eyes the day he rode into my life. The stairs I'd raced down that day he'd thought he could just walk straight out of my life without so much as a goodbye. The bush at the corner of the property behind which I'd hidden to watch Aidan and his goons leave, before I'd been whisked away to a place I'd never dreamed existed. To an unbelievable life.

  I yanked my eyes away.

  Goodbye, Mom.

  Somet
imes I wanted to just give it up, to just go back home, but Asgard made so much sense and gave me a fantastic reason to exist. For the first time, I had a real purpose in life. Maybe I did have something to thank my father for.

  Fen and I passed under the large oak at the foot of the driveway. A movement caught my eye; a curtain swayed in one of the windows across the street. Some things never changed in this neighborhood. Nosy neighbors.

  I glanced at Fen, relieved he blended into the shadows. His presence would definitely cause a stir on this quiet street. Hopefully I hadn't been seen either.

  I had to trot to keep up with Fenrir as he strode ahead. "What did you mean by my Retrieval?" I asked.

  "That is the reason you have come to Craven, Brynhildr. The reason you are here at all."

  "You called out everyone else's names and then told them who they would be retrieving. But you didn't give me a name."

  He didn't even bother to slow down, just walked on, crossing the street, expecting me to run just to catch his words. "So you thought you did not have a Retrieval to complete?"

  "I guess." Now I felt foolish. "So do we have a name?"

  "Wait. Some patience will do you good." Fen sounded strange, his voice tight and emotionless.

  The darkness lay thick and oily around us. Pointless examining his face for clues as to what was bugging him. Even if I waited for the clouds to move and reveal the moonlight, it would probably be of no use. Fenrir was too good at hiding his emotions.

  Despite the darkness, I recognized my surroundings. We passed the park where Aidan had sat on the swing beside me and watched Brody. The wind shoved through the trees and the two lonely swings swayed back and forth. Strange and eerie.

  We drew closer to the pathway where Pete and his friends had attacked me. My heart clanged in my chest, imprisoned in a steel cage with the memories of my near disastrous experience. I tried to think about something else. Like why were we here, and where were we going? Fen had refused to answer my questions. He continued walking into the trees and along the path until we neared the stream.