by Claire Adams
John and Sammy kept the conversation flowing seamlessly. They asked Marissa questions about her schoolwork and quizzed Josie on Spanish words. Josie laughed and recited everything perfectly, making John and Sammy burst into applause over and over again.
“I miss Noah,” Sammy sighed.
“It’s good for you to have a break,” Marissa said seriously.
“It is,” Sammy agreed. “But, if you could see his little face. Ugh, my heart.”
Marissa smiled and looked over at Josie. She brushed her hand gently over Josie’s hair. There was a look in her eyes that I hadn’t seen before. It made my stomach clench nervously and my heart race.
“We should get the kids together,” John said suddenly. “I mean, I’m in New York all the time for business. I could bring Sammy and Noah along with me. Josie and Noah would get along so well.”
“They really would!” Sammy said with excitement.
“I like play dates,” Josie said simply.
John and Sammy chuckled, but I could barely force a smile to my lips. I was still thinking about that look Marissa had given Josie.
“What do you think?” John asked. “Dirk?”
“What?” I asked blankly. “Oh! Um, yeah. That would be great.”
John frowned but didn’t question me. We’d only just become friends, but he could tell something was weighing on my mind. I only hoped he would refrain from asking me about it in front of Marissa or Josie. Neither of them needed to know the confusing thoughts spinning through my mind.
“Dessert!” Sammy announced with a clap of his hands. “Anyone?”
“Yes!” Josie cheered. She bounced up and down in her chair.
“Please,” Marissa said with a laugh.
Sammy left the table to retrieve the dessert from the little kitchen area. I watched him go, grateful for anything that would pull my attention away from Marissa.
I was finding it harder and harder to not stare at her. She was dressed casually that night, just wearing a simple dress and sandals. Still, her lips kept drawing my eyes. I couldn’t look at anything else for longer than a few seconds. And when our eyes met, I felt my palms begin to sweat beneath the table.
Sammy returned with a large ornate cake and five little plates. He passed out the plates and began to cut the cake, making Josie’s eyes widen with excitement.
“It looks so pretty,” she said in a hushed tone. “Are you sure it’s a cake?”
Sammy laughed and nodded. “It’s a cake,” he said. “I swear.”
He plopped a big piece on Josie’s plate and then handed her a fork. She just stared at the mound of chocolate heaven sitting before her.
“Go ahead,” Marissa said. “Dig in.”
Josie didn’t need to be told twice. She shoved her fork into the cake and took a huge bite. Her eyes closed as she chewed and mumbled “mmm” under her breath.
“I think she likes it,” Marissa said to Sammy.
“That was the goal,” he said.
He finished serving the cake and then sat down. Marissa kept up her end of the conversation flawlessly, but I still couldn’t speak. Every time John or Sammy asked me a question, I blinked blankly.
“Are you okay?” John finally asked. “You’ve been preoccupied all night.”
“Is it work?” Sammy asked sympathetically.
“No,” I shook my head. I paused, searching frantically for an excuse that would satisfy everyone. “I guess I’m just a little nervous about the move.”
“The move?” John asked.
“Josie and I are thinking about moving out here,” I said simply. “If only for a few months out of the year. We looked at houses and offices yesterday. We haven’t found anything yet, but hopefully, we will.”
I ended it there with a shrug. John and Sammy exchanged a look, and I worried they didn’t buy my story. It was the truth, but not at all the reason for my preoccupation.
“That’s so crazy,” Sammy laughed. “We’re thinking about the same thing.”
“What?” I blinked.
“That’s why we’re out here,” John said with a nod. “Sammy has always loved California. Chicago winters are becoming a bit too much for us to handle.”
“A bit?” Sammy scoffed. “I refuse to endure one more. I refuse.”
I laughed and nodded. “It’s amazing out here.”
“I love it!” Josie said.
“We do, too,” Sammy said. “We haven’t found any houses yet, either, but we’ve been looking since we arrived.”
“I’ll get to have play dates with Noah all the time,” Josie said.
Sammy and John launched into stories about their real estate ventures. They gave me the name of their agent and asked if I was looking for something close by or if I wanted to live further north. We went back and forth about the pros and cons until finally, I felt my stress begin to melt away.
Talking about the move was exactly the distraction I needed. Plus, knowing John and Sammy would be living in the area was enough to solidify my decision. I knew Josie would love living in California, but having friends nearby would be even better for her.
“I’ve interviewed at a few restaurants in the area,” Sammy continued. “But, I’m not totally sure I want to start working again right away. Noah will be in school, so I’ll have more time, but I don’t know.”
“You have time to decide,” John said. “There’s no rush.”
While we spoke, I noticed that Marissa had suddenly become quiet. She was sitting between Josie and me, staring down at her cake. I tried to catch her eye, but she wasn’t paying attention. I couldn’t tell if she was avoiding the conversation because her job would end in a couple weeks or because of what Josie called her.
“Is Marissa moving with us?” Josie asked suddenly.
That was the last question I expected to come flying out of my three-year-old’s mouth. I stared at her blankly, blinking like an idiot while I tried to think of something to say.
It wasn’t crazy that Josie would ask. After all, she and Marissa had become so close over the past couple weeks that it only made sense. Still, I didn’t know what to say. If I said no, then Josie would get upset. If I said yes, I would be lying.
“We haven’t really talked about that yet,” Marissa said kindly. “But, we’ll let you know as soon as we do.”
“Okay,” Josie shrugged and went back to eating her cake.
Finally, Marissa met my gaze. I mouthed a silent “thank you” to her and took her hand under the table. I squeezed her fingers between mine, and she held on tightly.
John and Sammy were gracious enough to gloss over the subject. They started talking about all the neighborhoods they’d seen. They told me where the good schools were and which private schools were the most prestigious. By the end of the night, I felt better about the move, but even more confused about Marissa.
After I took her hand, I never let it go. We held onto each other beneath the table until it was time to leave. My palm was sweaty, but she didn’t seem to mind. She interlocked her fingers with mine and let me rub my thumb over her soft skin.
She had saved me with Josie. Even hours later, I still didn’t know how I would have answered my daughter’s question.
Of course, Marissa wasn’t going to move with us, I told myself. I mean, she had a life in New York. A job and school. She was in the process of getting her degree. She couldn’t just leave all of that behind. Besides, this job was going to end for her. Soon.
That thought, more than anything, kept my hand glued to hers. The knowledge that she would be gone from my life in just two weeks was enough to make me never want to let her go. When she reached over to help Josie wipe her face, I gripped her hand tighter, unwilling to let her stray too far from me. I would lose her soon enough.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Marissa
By the time midnight rolled around, I knew I wouldn’t sleep that night. Dinner with John and Sammy had been nice. Sammy’s food was delicious, and I would be drea
ming about his cake for days, but that didn’t save me from yet another awkward encounter with Dirk.
Josie’s question had been innocent. I knew our situation was complicated for a three-year-old. She couldn’t possibly understand why Dirk had hesitated to answer her. To her, the idea of me moving to California with them only made sense. She and I had become close over the past couple of weeks. Dirk and I held hands often and hugged in front of his friends. Josie didn’t know it was pretend. She didn’t know her father was paying me to act like his girlfriend.
Even worse was that I was beginning to forget Dirk was paying me. Lately, our little act didn’t feel pretend. Everything about my feelings for him was real — more real than anything I’d felt for a long time. As much as I tried to deny it, I couldn’t.
When Josie had asked that very innocent question, I felt my heart drop into my stomach. My eyes found Dirk’s face, and I knew he felt the same way I did. He was frozen at the moment, unable to find the right words. Josie needed an answer, and Dirk couldn’t give one. So, I spoke up and prayed the conversation would change course.
Luckily, it did. John and Sammy were gracious enough to steer things away from the move. We talked about the kids and more things to do around the resort. Before long, it was time to say goodnight. Josie was wide awake after her nap and refused to lie down. Instead, Dirk took her for a late-night walk on the beach.
“Do you want to come with us?” he had asked, but I politely declined. Much to Josie’s disappointment, I needed a break.
Instead of joining them, I retreated into my bedroom and hid for the rest of the night. I heard Dirk and Josie come back around ten o’clock. Dirk got Josie bathed and ready for bed before he put on a movie for them to watch. It wasn’t long before I heard the familiar sound of Dirk’s footsteps padding across the living room floor. I assumed he laid Josie down in her bed and then found his way back to the couch.
I strained my ears for a sign that he was still awake. It was midnight, and my eyes refused to close. I stared at the ceiling and waited patiently, hoping Dirk would go to sleep soon. I longed to sneak out of my room and take refuge on the patio. I was sure that the fresh air would help me wrap my head around everything.
It was almost one o’clock when I finally pushed myself out of bed. I wrapped my robe tightly around me and tiptoed through the living room. It was pitch black, but I knew my way. I hurried outside, pulling the sliding door closed behind me.
When I sat in my usual chair, I sighed loudly and leaned back. The ocean breeze blew across my face, but the night was so thick that I could barely see the water. I closed my eyes and listened, trying to relax after the stressful events of the day.
It wasn’t long before my peace was interrupted. The door creaked open behind me. I jumped and spun around to see Dirk tiptoeing outside to join me.
“What are you doing up?” he asked kindly. He sat down beside me with a frown.
“I couldn’t sleep,” I said simply. He nodded, but didn’t push me to explain.
Instead, we sat in silence for what felt like hours. The night air felt amazing on my skin, and soon, Dirk’s presence wasn’t so easy to ignore.
“I’m so confused,” I said softly. “This thing we’re doing… I can’t make sense of it anymore.”
“I know,” he sighed. “I’m sorry. I can tell how attached you are to Josie, and I know she’s really starting to love you.”
I closed my eyes and tried to fight back the tears that threatened to pour. I loved Josie so much more than I had ever thought I could.
“It’s not just her,” I said.
His eyes met mine, and we both froze. For the hundredth time, I felt a fire ignite inside my chest. It boiled down to my stomach and made me squirm with desire. Just staring at Dirk was enough to make me want him. I couldn’t fight it anymore.
Without thinking, I pushed myself out of my chair and took a step forward. I leaned down, and before he could move, I was kissing him. My lips worked quickly against his, softening his mouth with my tongue. He groaned and tangled his hand in my hair, pulling me closer to him.
By the time we pulled apart, I was breathless. I needed more. One kiss wasn’t enough. It wasn’t enough to just taste Dirk for a few seconds. I needed to feel his body against mine.
I reached down to take his hand firmly in mine. Gently, I pulled him to his feet and took a few steps toward the door.
“Where are we going?” His voice was gruff with desire.
“To bed,” I said simply.
Dirk stopped, keeping hold of my hand. I spun around to face him. His eyes roamed over my face, searching for a sign that I might not be sure about this.
“I don’t want to break your rule,” he said quietly. “You’ve been amazing and trust me; I want this. God, I want this. But, Marissa, if you aren’t sure, if you don’t want to do this-”
I took a step closer to him. My hand flew to the back of his head, and suddenly, we were kissing again. This time, the kiss was harder and more urgent. Our tongues met, and a hungry moan escaped me. The sound made Dirk tighten his grip on my waist. He dug his fingers into my hips and pulled me closer to his body. I could feel his dick twitch inside his pajama pants.
“I’m sure,” I said, breaking our kiss for a split second. “Can’t you tell?”
He nodded and quickly led me inside. We hurried across the living room, slipping inside my bedroom as quietly as possible. The door was barely closed before Dirk’s lips were back on mine.
I stood on my tiptoes and wrapped my arms around his neck. He trailed his hands down my sides, squeezing my hips and yanking me closer. Our lips never slowed — not for a single second. Dirk kissed me with a fervor I’d never felt before. When he finally slid his hands up to push my robe off my shoulders, a chill ran down my spine.
He broke our kiss to look at me. His eyes trailed down my body as he groaned with need. I wore nothing but a pair of panties and a matching bra. The robe had hidden every inch of my skin but now, nothing separated me from Dirk’s hungry eyes.
“Fuck,” he said, “You’re gorgeous.”
With a grin, I pushed him backward toward the bed. I kissed him again, harder and faster while I searched frantically for the bottom of his shirt. When I found it, I pulled it over his head and threw it to the floor.
Dirk grabbed me around the waist. His strong arms lifted me easily. As he laid me back on the bed, my eyes trailed down his chest muscles to his abs. I reached up to pull him to me, desperate to feel his lips on mine.
Our bodies melded together seamlessly. I wrapped my legs around his waist while he held me close, kissing my lips and then my neck. I moaned as his stubble tickled my skin, sending shots of fire down to my groin. Within seconds, my panties were soaked and begging to be torn free from my body.
His lips moved lower. He reached his hands around me, lifting me just enough to unhook my bra. He pulled it over my shoulders and took my nipple into his mouth. I gasped and clawed at his naked back.
“Holy shit.” I could barely think as he nibbled and licked my sensitive skin. He took my other tit in his hand and massaged me, making me squirm beneath him.
I pushed my hips into his, rubbing my wet pussy against his dick. I cried out when he bit down on my nipple, but quickly bit my lip to keep from screaming. If I made too much noise, our moment would end. I couldn’t let that happen. Not when I was finally giving in to my needs.
Dirk pulled away from me and stood up. I whined in protest until I saw that he was sliding his pants off. His boxers fell around his ankles, allowing his rock-hard cock to spring free. I couldn’t help but stare as he moved back toward me. I sat up and reached out to him.
“I want you,” I said.
“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this.” His voice was rough, and when he kissed me, it was even rougher.
He yanked my hair back and jammed his lips against mine. I ran my fingers down his stomach, desperate to feel his cock in my hands. I slid my fingers up and down his len
gth, making him tremble with desire.
“Come here,” he demanded, wrenching his lips away from mine.
He lifted me easily and spun us around. He lay back on my bed, letting me straddle him. His hands worked quickly, shoving my panties over my ass. I lifted myself just enough to throw them to the floor before I leaned forward to kiss him again.
His hands were on my hips as I rocked slowly forward, letting my wetness coat his cock. He dug his fingers into my skin with a moan. I pulled away just enough to tease him. He kissed me hard, his tongue desperate and needy.
When I lowered myself back down, I let him finally slide inside of me. He filled me slowly and completely, making me groan and lean into our kiss even more. He was grunting already, lifting his hips to meet mine. I could feel every inch of him inside of me.
I sat up and leaned back, closing my eyes and giving in to the sensations. Dirk reached up to massage my tits, letting me ride him as slowly as I wanted. When our eyes met, he was staring at me in awe. He groaned when I picked up speed, riding him harder than before.
“Fuck,” he moaned. “Oh God, Marissa!”
The sound of my name on his lips was enough to drive me insane. I rocked my hips back and forth harder than ever, pressing my hands against his chest. I was already so close that when he took control, I came completely undone.
Dirk flipped me onto my back. He lifted my legs up onto his shoulders and rammed himself inside of me. The look in his eyes was no longer hungry or needy — it was desperate. He couldn’t hold himself back for another second. He took me as hard as he could, making me come so fast that I stopped breathing.
“Oh my God,” I whimpered. “Dirk, oh fuck.”
His dick twitched inside of me, and I knew he was close. He held onto my legs, his eyes rolling back. With a few final thrusts, he came just hard as I had. He dropped my legs and collapsed against me, his skin sweaty and his body trembling.
We held onto each other for a long time, neither wanting to be the first to let go. A million thoughts ran through my head, but I didn’t say any of them. I’d been waiting for this moment for a long time. Ever since the first time I saw Dirk, I knew I wanted him. But after he kissed me by the pool, this moment had been inevitable.