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Knots

Page 14

by Chanse Lowell


  She nodded, and her breathing evened out along with her shoulders, relaxing back into the seat.

  He smiled. Good. He said something to alleviate a few more of her fears and worries.

  Hopefully tomorrow they could go over the kink list and contract, and she’d be more open to it.

  They arrived at the club a few minutes later, and for a brief second, he wondered if she’d struggle with him taking control of the simple things like opening doors, pulling out chairs for her, or even guiding her with his hands by touching her.

  That question was put to rest quickly when he helped her out of the car, and she not only thanked him, but stood, waiting graciously for him to take the lead.

  His heart swelled and thumped in his chest.

  Without hesitation, he took the back of her elbow, directed her where to go and made sure she was always at his side.

  They found Marly inside fairly quickly, and he received a text from Tia, stating she and Rodney were on their way.

  A hostess seated them, and as he ordered for Jeanie, this time, Marly’s gaze on him was friendly.

  “I can’t wait to dance with you!” Marly told her.

  “Me, too, though I’m really out of practice. I’m not in horrible shape, but I still worry I won’t be able to keep up with you and your infectious energy.” Jeanie smiled at her with pride.

  “You’re beautiful, and it’s obvious you keep in good shape,” Mark told Jeanie.

  “That’s true,” Marly agreed. “I always wished Pono would start exercising again after he started working. I could tell he was really unhealthy, and I wished he wasn’t. When I’d ask him to dance with me, he stopped accepting. It always bothered me since I knew how much he loved dancing—it was in his blood.” Her eyes were moist. “I really miss him.”

  “We all do,” Mark replied. “He was a good guy and a fabulous friend to have. I’m sure he was the best brother in the world.”

  Marly swiped a few tears away, but her smile remained. “He was. He liked to occasionally email me these dorky jokes, but they always made me laugh.”

  Once the food came, they both let Marly take over the conversation. She talked a lot about school and some guy she was interested in. According to her, he was the best dancer she’d ever seen, and he had a great voice, too.

  Mark listened attentively and asked thoughtful questions. Each time Jeanie would look at him with this soft light in her eyes he’d smile at her, and her breath would hitch like he’d said something that touched her. He’d squeeze her hand under the table, and she’d squirm a little.

  Her reactions were so genuine. God, he couldn’t get enough of her.

  “Where is Tia?” Jeanie finally asked.

  “Text her while I go settle the bill,” he said, excusing himself.

  While he was taking care of the payment, he was approached by Tia and a dark, bulky, short man. He carried himself with confidence.

  “You must be Mark,” he said. “It’s good to finally meet face-to-face.”

  “Yeah, it’s great to meet you, too, Rodney. Especially after talking to each other on the phone a few times,” Mark replied, extending his hand.

  They shook. Mark smiled at Tia.

  “Sorry we didn’t join you for dinner. I decided you needed some time with Jeanie without Tia there as a crutch. We got our own table over in the smoking section,” Rodney said.

  “Thank you. I’m sure Jeanie’ll be happy to have her friend at her side for dancing, though,” Mark said, smiling wider. “If that’s all right with you, Rodney.”

  “Sounds good,” Rodney said. “We’ll follow you back to your table.”

  Mark nodded, finished taking care of the bill and then led them back.

  Jeanie’s face lit up right away, and she was all teeth and sparkling eyes.

  “You came!” Jeanie said, sitting up straighter.

  “Wouldn’t miss the dancing,” Tia said. She did a little shoulder bounce and started dancing on her own.

  Rodney caressed her shoulder and looked at her like he was ready to pounce.

  Mark was pleased she found a Dom that obviously adored her.

  He always felt bad there hadn’t been a deep connection between him and Tia, but there was no way to force chemistry. It wasn’t there. They made great friends, but not much more, even if they did play well together.

  Marly bounced up out of her chair. Mark made introductions to everyone, and before he knew it, Marly was dragging Jeanie by the hand onto the dance floor.

  He followed them out and danced several songs with them. It didn’t take long for Marly, the precocious teen that she was, to find new friends her age on the dance floor and forget all about Jeanie.

  Rodney and Tia were dancing on their own somewhere else far enough away that he wasn’t worried they might overhear them or see anything they shouldn’t if he decided to do more than dance with Jeanie.

  Mark took over in the middle of a dance, pulling his girl into him, keeping their bodies in constant contact. She was misted with sweat but smelled incredible. His mouth was on her every few seconds, and he groped her at will.

  With all the gyrating bodies around, no one noticed, and each time he ground into her, she would stop breathing and her pupils would dilate. She gripped onto his arms like she was anchoring herself to him. It made it hard to control himself when she’d give him a begging look and make these broken gasping moans in his ear. Damn, it made him impossibly harder for her.

  “When you look at me like that and make those soft pleasured sounds, I can barely keep from fucking you on this dance floor,” he whispered in her ear.

  She groaned, tucked her head into his heated chest and fisted his shirt with such force, it was obvious she was feeling the same way.

  “I love the way you dance. It hints at how sensual you are in the bedroom,” she replied, muffled by his chest, but he heard it clearly. “I keep replaying last night in my mind—can’t stop thinking about it.”

  “And you, little girl—when you dance, you let go, and you’re free. You stop thinking and give in to yourself, just like you do when you submit to me. It’s sexy as hell, and I can’t get enough of it. I’ll take you dancing every night if it helps you loosen up and unleash, and I’ll fuck you directly after in the shadows because neither of us can wait to get home,” he said.

  She went rigid.

  He chuckled. “Soft limit?”

  “I have no idea, but damn . . . I don’t know if I could do that.” She looked up at him, her big doe eyes searching for some sort of reassurance he wasn’t expecting her to be indecent in public right this minute.

  “We’ll work up to it,” he said, stroking her hair. “You’ll love it, and I’ll make sure you’re going out of your mind, ready to explode with passion so you won’t even be concerned about anything other than pleasing me. I’ll take care of you—always.”

  She nodded and tucked herself back into his chest. “Christ—you’d do that in public?” she murmured.

  Even though he knew she was talking to herself, he tipped her chin back. “I do whatever I want to give you what you need, sweetheart, and that’s all you need to know.”

  She blinked and then a lazy smile spread across her mouth. “Okay, Sir.”

  “Okay?”

  “Whatever you say. I’ll try to be more open-minded.” She stroked his chest, and his skin prickled beneath his shirt.

  He smiled, and his heart swelled. “Oh, such a good girl. You have no idea what it does to me when you give me your trust freely like this.” He cupped her chin and caressed it with the pad of his thumb, staring at her lips.

  Her breathing went ragged, and her eyes heavy while she wore a lazy, sated-looking smile.

  “Let me know when you’ve had enough dancing tonight because I’m dying to have you all to myself.” He kissed her forehead. “Especially now—since you’re choosing to be open-minded.”

  She sighed, looked like she was fighting off a shiver, then her expression went to one of
contemplation. “Whenever Marly seems done, we can go. I don’t want to hurt her feelings, Sir.” She glanced around for her sister-in-law.

  This time it was his turn to say okay, but he didn’t. He searched for her, too.

  After several minutes of looking for the teen, they both started to worry. She seemed to be missing.

  Jeanie texted her and a few minutes later received this reply—Got a ride home with a new friend. I had fun with u. Let’s go dancing again… Mar

  “That’s dangerous. She shouldn’t have done that,” Mark said, frowning.

  Jeanie started to shrug but then stopped. Did she think it would aggravate him if she made light of this? “She’s always been kind of reckless. It’s my fault. I should’ve kept a better watch on her.”

  “She’s not a toddler. She has some common sense. Sounds to me like she’s pushing buttons on purpose. If she blames this on you, I’ll be having a word with her parents about how she knew better, acted like a brat and didn’t tell us she was leaving and with whom.” He brushed some of the messy, loose hairs off her face. “Okay.” He kissed the tip of her nose. “Say bye to Tia and Rodney, and then we’re leaving.”

  They both said their farewells, and his chest heated while his heart hammered with anticipation.

  Mark took her hand, and they left in a flurry of quick steps and oozing sexual tension the entire retreat.

  He needed to feel her body up against his, tight and bound by him, even if it was a simple hug. Dancing had him all amped up.

  She needed it, too—he could feel it.

  Tonight he’d be more careful, more tuned into her and her body language so he wouldn’t scare her off.

  She fidgeted a little as he helped her into his car, but then she responded with a relaxed sigh when he joined her in there.

  His body did the opposite, ratcheting up a few notches in his anxiety level. He gripped the steering column when he realized that before he could have her in his hands again, he really needed to go through that paperwork so he could verify they were on the same page.

  Shit. He’d agreed they’d get to know each other for a full week before they did anything physical. But did that still apply after they’d already had sex three times? They hadn’t really said if they wanted to stick with that original plan or not. As far as he was concerned, that was null and void at this point.

  He could keep talking, and keep touching. They’d both get everything they wanted.

  He turned to her. “So, before things go any further, we’ll be going through the kink list and contract when we get home. No more misunderstandings. I want to know if you have any questions,” he said, his heart racing.

  His white knuckles told of hidden turmoil inside as he strangled the steering wheel with his fists. It even creaked a little under the pressure. He rolled down the windows, hoping it would help cool him since he was overheating with concern she was going to ditch him tonight.

  “Mark . . . Are you sure you wanna talk about this right now . . .” She caressed his hand and then his wrist. “We had so much fun tonight. You were a godsend, keeping me laughing and enjoying the atmosphere, helping me to relax and quit worrying. But now you’re doing it. I don’t want that for you.” Her voice was softer than the breezy, perfect night, surrounding them. “Can’t we just enjoy the peace for a little bit?”

  With the windows down, her hair would lift every few seconds and settle when a rush of air would zip through.

  She was mesmerizing. How could he not want more?

  “If you don’t want me to worry, and you want to enjoy the peace, then we need to go through this step. I know it’s foreign to you, but I’ll guide you through the entire thing. And then we can play. That’s always fun and relaxing—even better than dancing.” His voice was playful and light. The right corner of his lips twitched up into a dirty smile.

  He started the car and headed toward the exit of the parking lot.

  “Is that so?” She smirked, and her hands kneaded her thighs.

  Damn, that was seductive. His eyes followed her fingers for a brief second and he wished those were his hands there doing that.

  “Yes, it is, and we’re going to get this done and out of the way for the sake of both our sanities,” he replied.

  “Okay, I’ll do it. I may be in and out of your room tonight though as I adjust, and I’m sure I’ll drive you nuts, but I—”

  He pulled over with a jerk of the steering wheel.

  She stopped talking mid-sentence, and her eyes went wide as she stared at him.

  He parked the car, and his mouth latched viciously onto hers. His breathing was raspy, and he licked across the seam of her lips, commanding that she open to him and allow him inside.

  She did, and he groaned the second his tongue entered. Home—inside some part of her body, where he should always be.

  Ah God, hard and wanting, but finding some sense of calmness and balance.

  “Thank you,” he whispered between sliding strokes of his tongue across hers and tasting her unique flavor. “Thank you, sweetheart. I need you at my side from now on. You won’t regret it.”

  “I know I won’t.” She clutched his shirt at the collar. She held onto him like he was keeping her afloat.

  “Don’t let go,” he said. He moved his seat back and then slipped her onto his lap.

  “Trapping you again, Sir?” She eyed him.

  “Whatever it takes to keep you comfortable and with me, I’m willing to do,” he growled and nipped at her jaw. “I’m gonna hold you all night long, and I know you like that, too, but this time, if you wake up feeling out of sorts, I expect you to tell me right away. Don’t just take off. I don’t care how tired I am, or how deep asleep I am—wake me up. You’re more important to me than anything else, and I need to know what’s going on. Communicate with me.”

  She nodded and kissed him.

  She. Kissed. Him.

  Too fucking good.

  A feral, pinched sound emanated out of his chest. “Kiss me again,” he said.

  She smiled and leaned in, taking his bottom lip first and then slowly consuming him like she was savoring every inch of him.

  “I love the way you kiss me like it all makes sense,” she said, her tone reverent and heated.

  “That’s because it’s exactly what happens. You and I both feel so right when we come together it makes all our past relationships seem ridiculous. And that’s why you get scared. It makes you feel like a hypocrite, like your marriage was fake.”

  She began to speak, but he covered her mouth gently with two fingers.

  “You did your best, and so did he. Your efforts were commendable, but there was something missing. It lacked the deep, impenetrable connection you and I have. Don’t fight it. Don’t feel guilty. The past isn’t something you can change. It’s nice to try and figure out how it can navigate your future, but it’s not going to help you, other than realizing who you are and that I want all of you—every last fucking bit of the authentic you, not who you think you should be.”

  She breathed heavy and low. It sounded husky. He twitched in his pants and let go of her mouth.

  His hands stroked through her hair. “Talk to me. Am I already freaking you out?”

  “I . . . When you say stuff like that—I know you’re right. I can feel how true it is deep down in my bones, and my heart reacts instantly, but it almost makes me feel stupid, like I should’ve been able to figure this out on my own. Why don’t I have this kind of clarity? I mean, I love that you’re so insightful, but I always considered myself observant, so why don’t these”—she gripped his shirt again—“great moments of understanding hit me on their own? Why do I have to be dependent on you and Tia for them?”

  He chuckled and held her hands tight on him. “You already are figuring it out, and I only ever tell you what you already know but are too nervous to say. It’s there. I’m picking it up from you, reading your eyes. I’m not making this shit up as I go along. You’re the smart one, Jeanie. It’s
hard to see what’s directly before us when we’re standing too close to it.”

  Her grip lessened, and then she settled her palm on his chest, under his hands. The warmth of her skin, penetrating through his shirt, felt good.

  “That’s when we need a second party to figure out what’s going on because they can see the whole picture,” he said. “There’s nothing weak or dumb about that. It’s smart to ask for an outside perspective, and since Tia and I have been studying you for years and praying you’d find your way into this lifestyle, we can spot what’s bothering you quickly. When you’ve been in this life longer, you’ll be able to do the same for others as well.” He kissed the corner of her mouth gently, and her breath hitched. “Besides, we know what it’s like. You seem to think we never struggled with our identities in this lifestyle. We both had to find our way and navigate around stumbling blocks.”

  “I love you, Mark. I keep telling myself I can’t know that, and it’s too soon—I shouldn’t, but I do. I can’t help but be absolutely crazy about you. How can I keep you interested, though? You’ll grow bored of me and my boring vanilla flavor. I don’t know how to be seductive or—”

  “Stop.” He let go of her hands on him, gripped her shoulders and massaged them lightly. “What interests me, and has had me begging for morsels of your time for years on end, is you. It’s all you—watching that tender heart of yours go about caring for the people around you. Let your true nature come out—be you. That’s all I want, and it’s what I’m so attracted to, there’s no way I’ll ever grow tired of you. I want you to let me be the creative one, to find ways to lavish attention and kinky adoration on you.” He ran his fingertip across her lush bottom lip. “Does anything about that sound disgusting or boring to you?”

  He grew uncomfortably hard as ideas ran rampant through his head of all the wicked things he wanted to do to her.

 

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