Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Shoots and Scores

by Bathroom Readers' Institute

  —former L.A. King goaltender Kelly Hrudey

  “Anyone who wears one is chicken. My face is my mask.”

  —former Canadien,

  Gump Worsley

  “I’m sorry I can’t put on a show like some of the other goaltenders. I can’t look excited because I’m not. I can’t shout at other players because that’s not my style. I can’t dive on easy shots and make them look hard. I guess all I can do is stop pucks.”

  —George Hainsworth,

  former Canadien

  “It’s pretty tough for a goalie when you look at it. You’re always the last line of defence. If you let a goal in, you can’t go to the bench and hide between the guys or anything.”

  —former Canuck

  Kirk McLean

  “I just made up my mind that I was going to lose my teeth and have my face cut to pieces.”

  —Johnny Bower, after being asked why he became a goaltender

  “How would you like a job where, every time you make a mistake, a big red light goes on and 18,000 people boo?”

  —Jacques Plante

  “My style? What do you mean my style? My style is to stop pucks!”

  —former Flyer Roman Cechmanek

  “There is no position in sport as noble as goaltending.”

  —Vladislav Tretiak

  KEEP IT IN THE FAMILY

  As a family activity, hockey can sometimes mean more than the familiar picture of parents driving kids to practices and games on cold early mornings.

  From the start, hockey had brother acts galore, players of two, and even three, generations and family groups of fathers, sons, uncles and cousins. The NHL has had more than 70 father-son combinations in its playing ranks, and approximately 200 brother acts.

  THE SUTTER BROTHERS

  Grace and Louis Sutter of Viking, Alberta, are the most productive hockey parents. They raised seven sons on their farm and six of the boys born in a seven-year stretch from 1956 to 1963 had lengthy NHL careers. Brian, Darryl, Duane, Brent, and twins Rick and Ron played a total of 4,994 games and produced 2,935 points and all had the family toughness and tenacity. All six brothers went on to successful coaching, managing and scouting careers in the NHL and Western Hockey League. An older brother, Gary, likely would have had a hockey career, too, had he not chosen to remain at home and help with the farm while his parents were driving back and forth to the rink. While the Sutters hold the record for one generation of hockey players from a family, other clans also were well populated with puck-chasers.

  THE PATRICK PACK

  Patrick is among the game’s most illustrious names. In only a very few years in the past century has a family member or two not been involved in the top levels of hockey. Brothers Lester and Frank were top players in the formative years, founders and financial backers of the Pacific Coast League that competed with the NHL for talent and the Stanley Cup. Both managed and coached in the NHL, Lester the illustrious head of the New York Rangers for 20 years. Lester’s sons Lynn and Muzz had strong NHL careers, winning the 1940 Stanley Cup with the Rangers before moving into management: Muzz with the Rangers, Lynn with the Bruins and Blues. Lynn’s sons Craig (eight seasons) and Glenn (38 games) played in the NHL. Craig was the assistant GM-coach of the 1980 U.S. “Miracle On Ice” Olympic gold medal team, then became GM of the Rangers and Pittsburgh Penguins.

  CONACHER CONNECTION

  The Conacher clan of five boys and five girls grew up poor in downtown Toronto but that offered no roadblock to their participation in many sports, notably hockey. Three of the brothers became legendary NHL players: Charlie was the hard-shooting winger of the Toronto Maple Leafs’ fabled Kid Line in the 1930s with center Joe Primeau and Busher Jackson. Roy, also a winger, played for the Chicago Black Hawks. Three-time all-star defenceman Lionel was on two Stanley Cup winners (Montreal Maroons, Chicago) and, in 1950, was named Canada’s top athlete of the first half-century for his excellence in at least a half-dozen sports. Charlie’s son Pete and Lionel’s son Brian also had NHL careers.

  THE HOWE HOWITZERS

  Of all the highlights in Gordie Howe’s career, one has particular distinction: he’s the only father to be a teammate of his sons. Two years after he retired from a 26-year career of excellence with the Detroit Red Wings, Howe made a comeback with the Houston Aeros of the World Hockey Association, signing his biggest hockey contract in a package deal with his sons Mark and Marty. They spent four seasons in Texas winning two WHA championships and when the team folded, they played for two seasons with the New England Whalers, who moved to the NHL as the Hartford Whalers in 1979. Add up the Howes’ totals in big-league hockey—Gordie always insisted that his WHA numbers be added to his NHL statistics—and the numbers are staggering: 4,197 games, 1,449 goals, 3,214 points.

  THE HULL GUNNERS

  Bobby Hull, his brother Dennis and Bobby’s son Brett formed the highest scoring family unit in NHL history. In 3,697 games in the NHL and WHA, the Hull gang produced 1,944 goals, 3,825 points. Bobby broke Rocket Richard’s record of 50 goals in a season with 54 in 1955–56. Dennis probably shot the puck as hard as his older brother, and Brett, who arrived in the mid-1980s, had a magical goal-scoring touch, collecting as many as 86 in a season, 228 in a three-season stretch, and enough to break into the top three all-time (his father is twelfth).

  STAGGERING STATS

  The Stastny brothers, Peter, Anton, and Marian, who had all excelled with the Czechoslovakian national team, defected from their home country in the early 1980s to join the Quebec Nordiques. They played brilliantly, led by center Peter, who was the NHL’s second highest scorer in the 1980s behind the great Wayne Gretzky. The Stastnys achieved the extraordinary feat of averaging more than a point per game as a family (2,169 points in 1,949 games).

  AND CUPS ARE IMPRESSIVE, TOO

  Among brother acts, the Richard boys, Maurice “Rocket” and Henri “Pocket Rocket,” had a unique achievement with the Montreal Canadiens. The Richards could score plenty (902 goals in 2,234 games and 255 points in 313 playoff games) but their top feat is winning 19 Stanley Cups combined. Henri played on a record 11 winners while Maurice was on eight.

  FAMILIES GALORE

  The family trees seem un-ending in hockey, a list that includes the three gritty Hunter brothers, Dave, Mark and Dale; the slick Broten boys, Neal, Paul and Aaron; the raucous, fun-loving Plager brothers, Barclay, Bob and Bill; the high-scoring (821 goals) Mahovlich brothers, smooth six-Cup Frank and fun-loving Peter; Bill Dineen and his three sons, Kevin, Peter, and Gord; Cal Gardner and offspring Dave and Paul; three generations of the Hextall family, Bryan Sr., a key member of the Rangers’ 1940 Cup victory, his sons Bryan Jr. and Dennis, and grandson Ron, a fine goalie in a long career; the three Boucher brothers, stars all in the 1920s and 1930s, Frank, George, and Billy; and an unusual father-son pair of Bert Lindsay, a top goalie early in the last century, and his left-winger son Ted, a Hall of Famer.

  THOMPSONS, TURGEONS, AND TWINS

  Brother acts came in all shapes, sizes, and positions. Hockey’s early days had the fabled rowdy Cleghorns, Odie and Sprague. Bun and Bill Cook were keys to the Rangers’ early success on the great line with Frank Boucher. Gunners and goalies teamed up with the early era tandem of stopper Tiny (2.08 average in 533 games) and scorer Paul Thompson and, later, with gunner Phil and goalie Tony Esposito. Max and Doug Bentley, Nick and Don Metz, Kevin and Derian Hatcher, Joe and Brian Mullen, Marcel and Jean Pronovost, Sylvain and Pierre Turgeon, and Russ and Geoff Courtnall were front-liner brother acts.

  Twins Peter and Chris Ferraro played several games together with the New York Rangers and Pittsburgh in the 1990s, and many more in the minors. But the premier twin act is undoubtedly Daniel and Henrik Sedin, who dazzled Vancouver fans and confused the opposition with their tight teamwork and no-look passes after Canucks GM Brian Burke made some deals in order to draft them No. 2 and No. 3 overall in 1999 (Daniel was picked before Henrik…we think). In 2011, the Sedins became the first siblings to win
back-to-back Art Ross Trophie as the NHL’s top scorer (Henrik won in 2009–10, and Daniel in 2010–11).

  Dave and Ken Dryden stand out. They are the only brothers to be the opposing goalies in a game.

  STAAL IN THE FAMILY

  If the Sutters are the NHL’s most prolific puck parents, then Henry and Linda Staal (sod farmers in Thunder Bay, Ontario) run a close second with four boys all playing professional hockey: Eric of the Carolina Hurricanes; Marc of the New York Rangers; Jordan of the Pittsburgh Penguins; and baby brother Jared who, as of 2011, played in the Hurricanes’ farm system. Although the Sutter brothers all distinguished themselves during their careers with gritty, scrappy play, the family’s style of hockey is fluid and creative, and each of the four is a potential superstar. “It’s pretty scary, really,” said Mark Recchi, an NHL veteran and onetime teammate of Eric’s. “The Sutters are the other family to have that kind of success in the NHL. But these guys, geez, two of them [were drafted] second over all, one of them 12th over all, their younger brother going first round in the OHL. That’s pretty unique.”

  SIEVES AND SWISS CHEESE

  It may give coaches indigestion and fans heart palpitations, but bad goaltending makes for some great stories.

  NO-LUCK NHL NETMINDERS

  Today Greg Millen is well-known as a hockey TV commentator whose sharp tongue dissects the action for SportsNet and Hockey Night in Canada. But the veteran of 604 NHL games holds a dubious goaltending record. In 1982–83, he allowed a league-worst 282 goals in 60 games for the Hartford Whalers, which still stands as the all-time record. Millen also led the NHL in goals allowed in 1980–81 with Pittsburgh (258) and in 1983–84 with Hartford (221).

  Darryl Sittler will always cherish the memory of February 7, 1976, when he set an NHL record by scoring ten points in one game versus the Boston Bruins. However, Dave Reece, the Boston goalie, obviously has different feelings about being on the receiving end of an 11–4 thrashing. Reece told the Hockey Hall of Fame years later, “It was beachball city. It just wasn’t my night and Darryl was pure magic. The Leafs were going nuts, but I never realized he was doing all the scoring or going for a record. That’s the fun of sports, but sometimes I wonder why I wasn’t pulled after five or six goals.” It was Reece’s last NHL game. There’s a joke that claims Reece went out after the loss and tried to end his life by jumping in front of a train, but the train went right through his legs.

  Vancouver is sometimes dubbed the NHL’s “goalie graveyard.” Apart from Richard Brodeur and Kirk McLean in their peak-form days, goalies typically struggle to make their mark in the west coast city. After McLean was dealt to Carolina in 1998, the Canucks have gone through Sean Burke, Arturs Irbe, Garth Snow, Kevin Weekes, Felix Potvin, and Bob Essensa (plus a few others) before finally allowing Dan Cloutier to solidify his status as the number one man between the pipes. But even though the Quebec native posted three straight seasons of 30-plus wins from 2001–02 to 2003–04, Cloutier is probably best remembered for an incident in the 2002 playoffs. The Canucks held a 2–0 lead in their first-round series with the Detroit Red Wings, and the score was tied 1–1 midway through game three. That was when Detroit’s star defenceman Nicklas Lidstrom dumped in a 90-footer that got past Cloutier’s glove and into the net with 24.6 seconds left in the second period. It proved to be the winning goal. Cloutier’s play then took a nosedive and the Wings went on to win the series—and the Stanley Cup.

  Names such as Jacques Plante, Ken Dryden, and Jose Theodore have made Montreal’s goaltending famous. But not every Canadiens goalie has fared well. Patrick Roy, whom some consider the best goalie of all time, surrendered nine goals in his final game in Montreal, an 11–1 loss to Detroit. He then demanded a trade and was sent to the Colorado Avalanche. Roy’s erstwhile backup, Andre Racicot, earned an unfortunate nickname in his 68 NHL games: “Red Light.” It’s tough to prosper with that kind of reputation, though Racicot did get his name on the Stanley Cup in 1993.

  Another rather hurtful nickname was assigned to Warren Skorodenski, a minor league and Canadian national team goalie who managed to post a dismal 6.89 goals-against average and .720 save percentage over 61 minutes of playing behind the powerful 1987–88 Edmonton Oilers: Warren “Score Against Me.”

  INTERNATIONAL ERRORS

  Canadian goalie Bob Dupuis had a moment of Olympic shame in Lake Placid, New York, in a 1980 game versus Finland. From his own side of center, Finnish defenceman Kari Eloranta flipped the puck into the Canadian zone. Dupuis went to handle what should have been a straightforward play. But the slow-moving disc slid right past the goalie and into the empty net, which gave Finland a 3–1 lead. The blue-and-white team secured a spot in the medal round, while Canada, loaded with future NHLers such as Glenn Anderson, Randy Gregg and Paul MacLean, would have to settle for sixth place.

  In the 1981 Canada Cup, Mike Liut picked a bad time to have a bad game for the host nation. The St. Louis Blues netminder had been named a First Team All-Star the season before and NHLers voted him the winner of the Lester Pearson most-valuable-player Award ahead of Wayne Gretzky. Liut won four games and tied one prior to facing the Soviets in the final. There, his counterpart Vladislav Tretiak shut the door in the first period, and then the Soviets simply ventilated Liut, scoring on 30 percent of their shots in an 8–1 victory. Although Liut played another ten years of quality hockey—he earned the NHL’s best goals-against average in 1989–90—he never suited up again for Canada in international hockey.

  Probably the most famous bad goal surrendered in international hockey history occurred in the Sweden-Belarus quarterfinal at the 2002 Olympics. Belarusian defenceman Vladimir Kopat took a long floater from the neutral zone that Swedish goalie Tommy Salo struggled to handle. The puck hit him in the mask area as he tried to glove it down, and then it bounced over his shoulder and trickled slowly into the net with 2:24 left in the game. Kopat’s goal gave Belarus a 4–3 win over a squad that included Mats Sundin, Nicklas Lidstrom, and Markus Naslund. Apart from the USA’s “Miracle on Ice” victory over the Soviets in 1980 and Great Britain’s 2–1 win over Canada in 1936, this was probably the biggest upset ever in Olympic hockey.

  Canada’s Marc-Andre Fleury was the victim of bad luck in the 2004 World Junior gold medal game versus the USA. The young goalie came out to clear a loose puck but chipped it off the shoulder of teammate Braydon Coburn, and it rebounded into the net to give the USA a 4–3 lead and ultimately the victory. Still, Pittsburgh’s number one overall pick from the 2003 NHL Draft should have a bright future.

  ARMEN WHO?

  It’s hard to know whether to laugh or cry when you look at the goaltending stats of Armen Lalayan. The number one netminder for Armenia, that’s who. The 29-year-old struggled at the Division III tournament of the 2005 IIHF World Championship, playing every minute as Armenia lost 33–1 to South Africa, 23–1 to Ireland, 38–3 to Luxembourg, and 48–0 to Mexico. That left him with a 35.50 GAA and a .549 save percentage. Of course, he didn’t get much defensive support.

  PIONEER ON ICE

  At the winter Olympics, the Canadian and U.S. women’s hockey teams always dominate. One reason may be this little girl.

  ADIFFERENT WORLD

  Kids’ sports in the mid-1950s looked a lot different than they do today. Where nowadays you might see hundreds of girls turn out for a track and field meet or a youth soccer league, back then, their options were much more limited. Girls played on softball teams and a few played golf—but that was about it. But in Canada, where hockey is the national pastime, women’s hockey teams had existed since the first half of the century. Teams like the Preston (Ontario) Rivulettes, the Canadian women’s champions from 1930 to ’40, were local sensations. Still, any hint of competition between young girls and boys was quickly dismissed because boys were thought to be too rough.

  LI’L AB

  Abigail Hoffman’s brothers played hockey near their Toronto home when they were growing up in the ’50s. She was as devoted to the game as her brothers, an
d was known as a skilled and determined player. When she was eight, she decided to register for a boys’ team as “Ab Hoffman.” With her short tomboy haircut, no one suspected she was a girl. The league signed her up.

  Most of the kids on her new team, the Tee Pees, put on their hockey gear at home, only pulling on skates and gloves at the arena. So, with no locker room to contend with, there was no danger that someone might find out she was a girl. With plenty of practice and competitive games, “Ab” soon became one of the best defensive players in the league: a quick, agile skater who had no fear of chasing the puck into the action. At the end of the season, she was named to the league all-star team.

  PAPER TRAIL

  But in her second season, when her team was entered in the important Timmy Tyke Tournament, one tournament rule stated that each player had to bring a birth certificate to prove their age. When the organizers noticed that hers said “Abigail,” her secret was out. And when word spread that a girl was playing boys’ hockey, Abigail Hoffman became an instant celebrity. Her story began showing up in newspaper articles and TV and radio shows, and she handled the firestorm of publicity with surprising poise for a nine-year-old. She was invited to attend NHL games in Toronto and Montreal, and she continued to play for the Tee Pees, where she was well liked by her fellow players. One of her teammates insisted that none of them had had any idea of Abby’s secret. But they wanted her to stay, he said, because she was “really good.”

  UP AND RUNNING

  At the end of her second season, Abby joined a girls’ team, but said that it wasn’t much of a challenge. She tried and succeeded in other sports before devoting her athletic energy to track and field. She worked her way up through the tough ranks of middle-distance running and competed in two Olympics, winning a bronze medal in the women’s 800 meters event at the 1972 Games in Munich.