by Bec Botefuhr
“Want me to come?”
“No, it’s alright. I haven’t seen him in ages so I need the catch up.”
He smiles, “Well I will be at Max’s house if you need me, okay?”
I beam, and kiss him softly. “Okay.”
“Take care of my little blob.”
“Blob, that’s so mean.”
He chuckles, “Shhh, he can hear you.”
“He?”
“Or she” he shrugs, “whatever.”
I laugh. “I have to go.”
“Later, beautiful.”
I arrive at the restaurant an hour later and take a seat at our usual booth. I order some drinks and I wait… and wait… and wait. I look down at the time; my Father is over an hour late. I don’t understand, he hasn’t called and he isn’t answering the phone. I take another sip of my water and a strange sense of foreboding overwhelms me. I wait a little while longer but when he doesn’t show, I drive over to the beach house. There’s no sign of him, and his car isn’t in the driveway, so I make my way home. Maybe he got caught up in traffic, and he can’t find a phone to call the restaurant and let them know he couldn’t make it.
When I arrive back to my apartment, I can see Jaxson is home. With a sigh, I get out of my car and walk inside. Jaxson is facing the window, staring out. He has the phone in his hand, and…is he trembling? I walk over, and put my bag down. I feel sick, and I can’t explain why. It is one of those moments when you know something is about to happen, but you don’t know what. All you know is that it will change your life.
“Jaxson?” I say quietly.
When turns, I feel my heart stop. Tears are pouring down his cheeks, his eyes are red and his lip quivers.
“Jax, what happened?”
“I…I tried to call the restaurant…but you were already gone,” he croaks.
“What happened Jax? You’re scaring me! ” I cry, gripping his shoulders.
“Your Dad was on his way to the restaurant, and…he didn’t see the other car, it just came out of nowhere. His car rolled and….”
“Jaxson,” I whisper, feeling my world go dark. “What happened?”
“He is gone Mandy. Oh God I can’t believe I have to tell you this but… your dad passed away half an hour ago.”
I can hear screaming and it takes me a moment to realize that it is me making the sound. I don’t feel my body fall; I don’t feel Jaxson’s arms around me. I don’t feel anything.
Daddy, please, no… say it's a dream; that it isn’t real.
~*~*~*~
The next few days are a blur; I don’t remember anything. I can’t think about anything but my Father and each time I do the emotions hit me all over again; I cry so much I run out of tears. Caden is by my side while I scream at night and sob continually through the day. My Mother comes back, and together we comfort each other as best we can. The funeral is today, and I can’t bear to think about it. I can’t bear to lay him to rest; it just doesn’t seem real.
We arrive at the Church to find it packed with friends and family. I don’t speak to many of them; I just keep my head down. Jaxson holds my arm and Caden holds my hand as we line up at the front. The big wooden casket sits beside a dazzling photo of my Father; he’s smiling. My heart clenches and fresh tears stream down my cheeks. How will I ever get over this? How will I ever move on?
“I am here,” Caden soothes, holding my hand tightly, “I won’t leave you.”
I don’t answer, I just stand staring at what I know is the last memory I will have of my Father; him in a wooden box. When the Priest comes in and begins to speak, I zone out. I don’t want to hear about how much my Dad loved his life, and how good he had it. I shouldn’t have to listen, he should still be alive; he shouldn’t be gone. A song playing in the background brings me back into the room. My Mother rises to her feet and stands at the pulpit to make a speech.
It’s all too much and I physically crumble.
Caden catches me as my knees give out. I wail and whimper ‘Daddy’ over and over again. I never got to say goodbye. I never got to tell him I loved him one last time. He is alone now and he was alone before he passed; it breaks my heart to I know I can never change that.
Being unable to change the unchangeable is a gut wrenching feeling. I watch my Mother through my bleary eyes, I know how she feels. Still guilty over the break up, she will live with that forever. As the final speeches are given, I close my eyes and take myself to a different place; a place where pain and heartache were no more…
A place where I had my Dad… just one more time.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
FIVE MONTHS LATER
“Oh God,” I cry, gripping my stomach.
“It’s happenin’,” Caden yells, pacing the room.
As the next contraction rips through me, I double over and scream. “Ooooooh, it hurts.”
“Do I call the doctor? What do I do?”
“Take me to the hospital,” I wail, “Please.”
He grabs my car keys and hurries me out the door. My stomach is cramping, and pulses of tension are radiating through my back. Oh God, the pain is incredible; it is out of this world. As we drive, I try hard not to shriek with every twinge but it is getting to the point where I can’t bear it any longer. It came on so quickly; I wasn’t ready. The books could never explain the pain I feel right now.
When we arrive at the hospital, I am rushed straight into the labor ward. The midwives flutter around me, preparing for the birth of our child. I am told I’m ready to push, and it is quite a shock. I thought it took longer, why is it happening so quickly? When I begin to push, Caden holds my hand and urges me on, his face is slightly pale. I throw up during the last stage of pushing and the poor man cops most of it.
“Do you want to see this?” The midwife asks Caden.
“Um, no thanks.”
“It is beautiful.”
With reluctance, he lets go of my hand and walks down the other end.
“Holy fuck,” I hear him murmur.
I push some more and then, suddenly, it is over. Just like that, the pain is gone. I hear the tiny cries of a baby, and then the sound of the nurse announcing ‘It’s a girl.” I slump backwards, and tears roll down my cheeks. A moment later, a tiny bundle is placed onto my chest. A beautiful baby, with dark locks of hair. Caden stares down at her, and his eyes fill with unshed tears.
“Oh God! She’s beautiful,” I croak.
“Congratulations.” The midwife smiles.
“Oh fuck,” Caden whispers, “Angel, is she really ours?”
“She really is.”
~*~*~*~*
“Congratulations!” Jaxson cries later that afternoon when I am back in the ward.
“Thanks,” I say, shifting in bed and handing him my daughter.
“Oh, look at that face…” he whispers, cooing.
“You are a softy,” I laugh.
“You two made a cute kid; I mean God…check her out?! She’s so tiny and cute.”
“Jaxson, you realize you just used the word cute twice in one sentence?”
“Nothing else explains her; she is perfect.”
“I know.”
“Where is Caden?”
“He went home to have a shower, he will be back.”
“How does he feel about her?”
I beam remembering the look of utter awe on Caden’s face the first time he held our baby girl. “He loves her.”
“What have you named her?”
“I am not sure yet, we are still deciding.”
“What about your Mom?”
“She is thrilled; she’ll be here tomorrow.”
“This beautiful little girl is like the little light at the end of the tunnel you know? After your Dad, she makes it all seem like there can happy end.”
I smile painfully, thinking of my Father. “He would love her.”
“He would, he would be so proud of you Mands.”
I swallow back my tears and nod, forcing back the ache in
my heart for my Dad.
“How are my beautiful girls?”
I turn to see Caden walking in, followed by Bill and Max. Trailing behind them is Travis, who looks rather bored.
“Well Angel, you look mighty fine for a woman that just pushed a baby out.” Max grins, patting my hair.
“Thanks Max.”
“Well fuckin’ look at her, ain’t she a cutie?”
Caden takes our little girl from Jaxson, and I beam at seeing her in his arms. She is so tiny against him, but they fit so perfectly. Travis gets up on my bed, and I beam at the blonde little boy. His grey eyes twinkle as he leans over Caden and looks down at the baby.
“What is her name?” He asks.
“I don’t know little buddy; we haven’t decided yet.”
“Can I hold her?”
When Travis sits, and Caden puts the baby in his arms, I smile. I know the two will grow up to be friends; how can they not? It is just the way it works in this kind of world.
“I like her,” Travis smiles, touching the baby’s nose.
“I am sure she will like you.”
“How long until she can play?” he asks me.
“A little while yet sweetie.”
When they are finished, they all leave with more congratulations and well wishes. When Caden and I are alone, he slides into the bed beside me and looks down at our baby. I feel a massive swell of pride in my chest; we are a family and I know everything is going to be okay, because Caden will make sure of it.
“What do you think we should call her?”
I rest my head on his shoulder. “I kind of like Violet…”
He grins, “Violet is real pretty.”
“Violet Williams.”
“Look at that face Angel, the way she is lookin’ at me and gripping my finger,” he says, and I stare at Violet holding onto his finger, “she is goin’ to give her old man a hard time, I can see it now. This little girl is goin’ to be full of mischief so that is what I am gonna call her.”
He leans forward and rubs his nose along her forehead; it’s a beautiful sight.
“Welcome to the world, Mischief.”
EPILOGUE
TWENTY FIVE YEARS LATER – CHIEF
“Angel?” I call, standing in the driveway.
“Caden, what are you doing here?”
I stare at my wife coming out of the house; half-dressed with a full face of make-up. I grin at her; she is still as beautiful as the day I met her.
“Travis is havin’ a fit, he can’t find the rings.”
“Are you serious?!” She cries.
“Oh no!”
I hear the voice from inside, and out comes my little girl. She looks breathtaking and I feel all the air leave my chest. She isn’t in her dress yet, but her dark locks are up in some fancy way and her face is all made up makin’ her look a million bucks.
“Well fuck Mischief, look at you.” Pride makes my voice falter slightly, and I cough to hide it. But my Mischief is as vigilant as her Daddy and she picks up on it.
“Daddy, don’t go soft on me; I’m already dealing with Momma and her crying.” She taps her foot impatiently. My baby girl is just like me; doesn’t waste any time with bullshit and gets straight to the point; I’m so proud of her. “What did you say about the rings?”
“Nothin’ for you to worry about.”
With one hand on her hip, she shakes a finger about an inch from my face. “If Travis has lost them, I will kick his ass so hard.”
I chuckle. “All good baby. Now get on inside and sort yourself out.”
Looks at me as if she’s unsure whether to hug me or kick my ass. Thankfully she decides to take my advice and walks back inside. I grin at Mandy, who gives me a sly smile back.
“You look handsome,” she murmurs.
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah.”
I wiggle my eyebrows at her. My Angel always was a wildcat! “Want to come down here and give me some sugar then?”
She laughs, “No, I have to feed Grace.”
“Give me a cuddle of my grandbaby, she is half mine.”
Mandy rolls her eyes, and goes inside to get the little girl. She brings her out on her hip, and I grin. Grace is nine months old and cute as a button. She grins at me, with those two front teeth and those big baby blues. Little golden curls cover her head, just like Mischief had as a baby, only Mischief’s were dark. Mandy hands her over to me, and her tiny fingers grip the chain around my neck.
“Your daddy is havin’ a fit Gracie girl. He is goin’ to make your Momma bust a lid.”
Mandy laughs. “Stop that; it'll be fine. Go on, off you go; you should be with Trav. He’s no doubt freaking out bless him.”
“You should see him; the cool, calm rock star is having a hissy.”
Mandy rolls her eyes, “You should go back.”
“Who would thought we would be here? Do you remember when Travis first laid eyes on her; heck she was just a baby and he couldn’t wait to play with her. Now they are gettin’ married.”
Mandy sighs, grinning down at Grace. “I know; our baby is all grown up.”
“Angel, that girl has been grown up since she was sixteen.”
“I know….anyway…quit distracting me; you should go.”
“Give me a kiss beautiful.”
“Still sweet talking me after all these years Caden?”
I snort, “You know it.”
She presses her soft lips down on mine, and like always, it takes me to a better place. The woman is my life, she has been since I met her and it only gets better. I pull back and hand Gracie back to her. Dropping one last kiss on her forehead, I head back to save Travis from disaster. That boy will crumble if he ain’t careful. Fuckin’ pussy!
~*~*~*~
Sweet Jesus; my baby girl looks like a doll. That dress, that hair, those eyes; the girl is damn near making her Old Man cry. Travis stands at the altar, his eyes fixed on her. His face radiates pure love; then again that boy has always wanted my girl in a way that no one could understand. A lone tear sneaks down his cheek and, in that moment, I am proud of him.
“Heck Chief, look at your little girl,” Bill whispers beside me.
“Fuck me Bill, she is killin’ me.”
“Looks like a fuckin’ princess she does.”
I nod and watch as my wife gives me a wink. She looks just as stunning. My heart seizes; I gotta be the luckiest sonofabitch alive to have my beautiful girls in my life. I watch my daughter stand in front of the man she loves, this moment has been comin’ a long, long time. After all the shit they’ve been through, they deserve this; they deserve happiness. I can’t help but crack a smile when they start sayin’ their vows.
“Do you Travis Phoenix, take Violet Williams as your lawful wedded wife? Do you promise to love her? Cherish her? Be there for her through good times and bad? Through sickness and in health? Until death do you part?”
“I do,” Travis croaks.
“And do you Violet Williams; take Travis Phoenix as your lawful wedded husband? Do you promise to love him? Cherish him? Be there for him through good times and bad? Through sickness and in health? Until death do you part?”
“I do,” Mischief whispers.
“Then, it is with great honor that I pronounce you husband and wife. Mr. Phoenix, you may kiss your bride.”
Travis grips Mischief’s face and pulls her into a sizzling kiss. Damn it, they are gonna make me fuckin’ cry and that ain’t good. Bill pats me on the shoulder. I send up congratulations to Max. I know he would want to see his boy gettin’ married; I know Travis would have made him proud. If his Mother gave a shit about him, she would’ve been here too but, unsurprisingly, she didn’t show.
Travis has been like a son to me since he was born. He had a rough Dad, and a Mom that didn’t care about him enough to stick around. He didn’t see much of her throughout his life, and he doesn’t see her now, but he has one heck of a family. He has driven me crazy, made me do shit I didn’t wanna do, b
ut the boy has made me proud and that has to count for something.
Two hours later, I am preparing for my wife’s surprise. I head out front as a white sedan pulls into the drive way, and out gets the one and only Jaxson. I grin, shaking my head. The years haven’t changed the boy, he looks exactly the same as he did when I last laid eyes on him. Heck, I don’t even think the man has filled out. He grins at me, showin’ those fuckin’ white model teeth, and I can’t help but grin back.
“Well well, the years have been kind Caden.”
I reach out and take his hand, shaking it with a grin. “Can’t say the same.”
He laughs, “You always were too sexy for your own good.”
“What’d I say about hittin’ on me?”
He winks, “Where’s my main woman?”
“She is gonna piss her pants.”
“You think?”
Mandy hasn’t seen Jaxson for a long time, I know they still talk on the phone, but I know that she has been trying to see him for a long, long time. I turn and he follows me inside, the bikers give him a once over, and then give me a horrid look. Yeah, well, they can suck it for a minute. When Mandy sees Jaxson, her eyes widen.
“No,” she whispers, standing.
“Mands, holy shit, look at you!”
“Jax?” she screams, running towards him, “Oh my God, it can’t be.”
They leap at each other, and become a tangle of arms and legs. After they stop screaming, and Mandy introduces Jaxson to everyone, she finally settles enough to focus. She is beaming as she walks over to me, her face flushed with excitement. Her hands grip my shirt, and she curls her fingers into it. She looks up at me with those sparklin’ blue eyes and smiles.
“What you did, oh Caden, thank you.”
“I knew you wanted to see him.”
She strokes my cheek; damn woman gets to me even now. “It was the best thing you could have ever given me.”
“Aside from Mischief.”
She laughs, and looks over at our daughter mingling with her guests. “Didn’t she look amazing?”
“She’s fuckin’ beautiful, no doubt.”
“You just wait until later; I have a surprise for you.”
Before I can say another word, she nips my bottom lip with her teeth and saunters away, dammit, now I am hard in the middle of a wedding reception. I sit at the table, controlling the urge to run away with my wife, when Mischief comes over. I grin up at her, that beautiful face should be on a fuckin’ poster.