Shrouded in Blackness

by Karlsson, Norma Jeanne

  “Collin?” I yell across the gym. My cousin, Collin O’Sullivan, a cop, is standing in the middle of the gym talking to Connor and Owen. Ian’s coming down from his office and Quinn’s standing in the doorway of the therapy room, shaking from head to toe, holding Ash tightly to her chest, her gaze fixed on Jack who’s in front of Connor and Owen, smiling broadly at my cousin.

  “Hey, Kieran,” Collin calls out in a friendly tone. I make my way to the group, saddling up next to Connor. I slide my hand onto Jack’s shoulder and pull him in front of me as Ian joins our group. Jack looks up at me, noticing my tension, and reaches his arms up. I scoop him up and he wraps around my front like a monkey the same way he does with his momma.

  Collin’s eyes bug out at the vision of me holding a kid. I stifle a laugh at his reaction.

  “Think we can talk alone for a sec?” he asks once he rearranges his eyes in his head.

  “You can use my office,” Ian offers.

  “I’ll meet you up there,” I say and turn toward the therapy room. When I get to Quinn at the doorway and she scurries into the bedroom. I shut the door once we’re inside and set Jack down on the bed.

  “Don’t worry. He’s my cousin. No big deal,” I soothe Quinn.

  “Okay,” she replies softly, trying to rein herself in.

  “Your cousin has a badge. He showed it to me.” Jack’s eyes are wide with wonder.

  “Pretty cool, bud. You watch your sister for a second while I go talk to your momma about some boring grownup stuff, okay?”

  “Sure. Can I watch TV?”

  I look to Quinn and she offers me a slight nod.

  “Yup,” I say, turning on cartoons and dragging Quinn into the bathroom. I turn on the tub to drown out our voices.

  “Quinn, everything’s fine. Take a breath for me,” I say sweetly. She takes a few deep breaths and then dives into my chest. I wrap my arms around her until she stops shaking. Once she’s calmed down I tip her chin up with my finger.

  “I promised to keep you safe. I’ll keep you safe. Trust me?”

  “Yes,” she responds immediately and my heart zings to life. That cold dead rock in my chest pounds so hard it hurts. I run the back of my fingers down her cheek and stare into her dazzling eyes.

  “How old are you?” Yes, this is a weird moment for me to ask that question, but it tumbled from my mouth before my brain could shut it down. She rolls her eyes at me.

  “Eighteen,” she says with a sweet smile. At least she’s legal. And there’s the prick I know and love. I cannot be thinking the thoughts I’ve been having about an eighteen-year-old. Time to shut it down old man. This girl is officially off limits!

  “Jesus, Kieran, I’m fuckin’ with you. You look like I just kicked your puppy. I’m twenty-six.”

  I scowl at her and release her from my grip.

  “Not funny,” I growl. “Stay in here with the kids until I come get you.”

  I stalk out of the bathroom and smile at Jack before I head up to see if my cousin is here to arrest me. Wish me luck!

  Kieran

  When I open Ian’s office, I find Collin sitting on the couch I held Quinn on yesterday. Today it doesn’t look quite as inviting. Collin’s a tall guy, a few inches over six feet. He’s got dark hair like me and Milk Dud eyes. All the O’Sullivan boys look the same, and from what the ladies say, they’re good looking. My uncle, not really because he and my dad are first cousins, Stephen O’Sullivan, is the Bureau Chief of the Bureau of Organized Crime here in Chicago and his sons are the spitting image of him. Collin and his younger brother, Hugh, are homicide detectives, while Brian is an attorney in Kansas City with Shannon and her gang of protective brothers. We are a strange, tangled web of relationships that skirt legal and illegal, killers and saviors.

  “What’s up, cousin?” I ask with a smile touching my lips. Collin looks up at me from his phone and grins. He’s not here to arrest me. I feel the tension leave my shoulders as I plop down on the couch next to him.

  “Talk to Shannon lately?” Collin asks.

  “Yesterday. Why?”

  Collin’s brow is furrowed in concern. Fuck, if something happened to Shannon, I’ll lose my shit.

  “Brian called this morning. She’s not doin’ good. Said she’s lost a shit load of weight. I’m worried about her. We’re all fuckin’ worried,” he groans and throws his head back on the couch.

  “She’s not good at wait-and-see. Shannon’s like a dude—action first, questions later. Waitin’ around for Kellerman’s gonna take its toll. Somethin’ else wrong with her?”

  “She’s fine on the phone. She laughs and gives me shit like always, but that light is dim. I feel like we’re barely hangin’ on to her.” Collin scrubs his hands vigorously over his face.

  “My parents are headed down next weekend. They can’t take it anymore. Ma says she’s gonna force feed her all weekend,” he finishes in a grunt.

  “Shannon’s gotta get through this thing her way, Collin. She was kidnapped, tortured, almost raped, fuckin’ shot to shit and then her man was ripped from her arms on Christmas morning. Give her some time. She’s not made of glass. Shannon’s tougher than all of us put together. She’s good,” I say encouragingly. I’m the only one that knows Shannon also had to kill someone while those fuckwads had her. I know because I make it my business to know everything. I haven’t told Shannon that I know. It’s her secret to hold as long as she wants.

  “You ever love someone so much it fuckin’ hurts?” Collin asks with pain in his voice.

  “Shannon,” I respond swiftly.

  “If I thought she’d be safer in Chicago I’d drag her ass up here and keep her in my house. Fuckin’ hate havin’ her in Kansas City away from me. I know Brian and the guys have her covered, but I want eyes on her.”

  “She’s better in Kansas City. It’s her home. Go see her, man. You know she’ll be happy to look at your ugly mug all day long. Give you some peace of mind.”

  I clap him on the shoulder and he finally picks his head up and looks at me. Shannon’s his sister for all intents and purposes. He’s at war with himself to not be a caveman when it comes to her. Shannon is not Quinn and would not take kindly to caveman behavior, no matter how well intended. Collin knows this, hence the struggle.

  “Got a body this morning,” Collin says, changing the subject.

  “So you’re not just here to talk about your hot sister?” I snark. “You get bodies in your line of work, cousin. What do you need from me?”

  “Body is Vasily Rostov. Hit man for the Russians. His widow says you dragged him outta their house around midnight,” Collin explains with a brow raised.

  “Dude was a piece of shit with a lot of enemies. I didn’t know him though, only by reputation.” I shrug.

  “You drag him outta his house last night?”

  “Fucker had a taste for little boys too. Did you know that? Liked to kill people for money and then torture kids. Someone did the world a favor, endin’ his ass,” I grunt.

  “So you’re avoidin’ my question and givin’ me your reasons. Not here to arrest you, cousin. I know about Rostov…you don’t see me sheddin’ tears for him. I need to know if your name comin’ up is an issue. That widow’s runnin’ her mouth to any and every ear that’ll listen, meaning all the Russians are meetin’ now to surely plan your beheading.”

  If only I didn’t have issues hurting women. Goddamn it!

  “You got a way to swing this in someone else’s direction?” I ask, knowing I can do it myself but it’ll take time that I now don’t have.

  “Already did. Russians have some beef with a small street gang. I may have dribbled some information that I thought could be helpful. Just doin’ my duty,” he says with a wink.

  “Street gang deserve that kinda heat?”

  “They help traffic women and kids. Whatever they get they fuckin’ got comin’,” Collin growls. I offer him a chin lift.

  “So…wanna tell me why you got a woman and two kids hidin’ downst
airs?”

  “No.”

  “You need help, Kieran?”

  “Got it covered.”

  “Call me if that changes.”

  Collin stands up and I follow. We shake hands and he pulls me in for a man-hug-back-slap.

  “Nice work on Rostov,” he compliments in my ear.

  I pull back and offer him a giant smile. He laughs while we exit the office. Collin says his goodbyes to the guys, who are just standing around waiting in the gym, and leaves.

  “All good, boys. Gonna go check on them,” I say, indicating my chin toward the back. Ian eyes me for a moment and I offer him my cockiest grin, causing him to smirk and shake his head. I’m a pain in the ass. I know.

  I amble through the therapy room and hear Jack squealing and giggling beyond the bedroom door. When I walk in, Quinn’s on her back flying him around on her feet making crappy airplane sounds. Ash is sleeping on the bed wearing a new outfit that’s hot pink. I liked her better in black.

  I snatch Jack off Quinn’s feet and swing him around a few times before plopping him on the end of the bed. His blue eyes are shimmering with joy.

  “Gonna head out now, bud. You still good stayin’ here and watchin’ your sister?” I ask softly.

  “Yup,” he replies, popping his p.

  “Good boy. You wanna hang out in here or out in the gym?”

  I know he doesn’t want to be in a closed-off room with the guys. Even though he trusts nothing will happen to him.

  “Can we watch The Avengers?”

  “You bet.” I pluck him off the bed, holding him against my side, before scooping Ash up to my chest. I walk them out to the gym where Owen is setting up the movie already and Ian is carrying a bowl of popcorn to the couch.

  “Little man,” Connor calls from behind us. “We got candy, soda and popcorn. You ready to do this?” He offers Jack a mischievous grin.

  “Cool,” Jack responds and slides down my body, running toward Connor, who picks him up and sets him on his shoulders. I smoothly pass Ash to Ian as Quinn comes up beside me.

  She’s wearing green cargo pants, biker boots and a black hoodie with the hood up over her head.

  “Be good,” she says softly to Jack who launches himself off Connor’s shoulders, down into her arms. It was a steep fall, but she catches him with ease.

  “Love you, Mommy,” he says softly.

  “Love you, Baby,” she coos, running her thumb over his dimple. After a moment, she hands him back to Connor who holds Jack high above his head and starts running through the gym. Jack laughs in delight.

  “Let’s move,” I instruct with my hand on Quinn’s back. She quickly walks to the door, stepping away from my touch. Yeah, she’s pissed at me. Well touché, honey.

  I let her in the Camaro and then quickly climb in before speeding down the road. The silence in the car is tense. Quinn’s whole body is pressed against the door, her hood still up and with the angle of her body, I can’t see her eyes. I’m losing my will to be irritated at her joke earlier.

  I pull up at the two-car garage behind my house a few minutes later.

  “Need to switch cars. You wanna see the house now? Get a feel for whatever furniture we’ll need and whatnot?” I ask gruffly.

  “’Kay,” she says blankly. This isn’t the Quinn that I’ve been with the last two days. This is the Quinn I met with a knife to my back. I’ve fucked up and I haven’t even done anything yet. Shannon would beat my ass.

  Quinn hops out of the car and waits for me to lead the way. We head through the garage to the back yard, up the deck, and through the back door. The house is an average, pale brick family home, paid for in cash a few years ago.

  The back door opens into a large kitchen-dining-living room. I gutted the place after I bought it and knocked down every wall that I could. I like the open space. I put in a fully upgraded, high-end kitchen with stainless steel appliances and quartz countertops with black cabinets. Dark hardwood floors run the length of the space. The living room has a charcoal suede-effect sectional with two matching chairs facing a fireplace. I spend most of my time in the finished basement in my recliner staring at my sixty inch flat screen.

  Quinn walks through the house slowly, glancing around at the light grey walls which hold a lot of photos from my life. She runs a finger down the length of the dining room’s walnut table before entering the living space. She turns toward the hall that leads to the bedrooms and waits for me to lead the way again.

  I open the first door on the right. It’s an empty ten foot by ten foot bedroom. I haven’t had any use for it so all that’s in here is the new carpet I had laid.

  “This can be Jack’s room,” I mumble. Quinn looks around the space briefly and then waits for me to move it along.

  I open the next door on the right which is the main bathroom. It has double sinks, and a soaker tub with a shower overhead. Quinn steps onto the travertine floors and glances at the black marble vanity. She waits again without a word.

  I open the next door on the right. It’s a bigger bedroom than Jack’s with a queen cherry wood sleigh bed, matching bedside table and dresser. There’s room in here to fit a crib and it won’t be cramped. Again, she glances around, but says nothing. I press my hand in the small of her back and feel her knife saddled against her skin. She flinches away from me, walking to my bedroom door at the end of the hall. I push the door open and she takes one cautious step in.

  My room is a large extension off the back of the house. It has a black four poster California king against the wall to the left. The entire back wall is made of glass, looking out onto the deck. I can open the wall completely in the summer. I don’t have much furniture in here other than two bedside tables and two dressers that came with the bed. I’m not an interior decorator. Matching takes the work out of it for me. I walk into the room and open the door to my ensuite. Quinn follows and glances around quickly at the double black marble vanity, jetted tub and separate walk-in shower. I walk through the bathroom and open the attached dressing room. She doesn’t follow, just peers in the door from where she stands. I shut the door and move past her back into my bedroom. When she comes out she doesn’t meet my gaze, just waits.

  “You wanna have this fight now and get it outta the way?” I snarl. Quinn slowly brings her head up. I’m expecting to see fury and instead I’m met with remorse and anguish. I take two strides to her and hoist her up to my chest by her armpits. She wraps her arms around my neck while I constrict around her back.

  “I’m sorry,” she whispers. I hold her snugly before placing her back on her feet.

  “When you said you were eighteen, the only thing I could think was that meant some sick fuck had raped you at eleven or twelve and left you to raise Jack on your own on the streets. After what we had just gone through, it was too much for my brain,” I explain softly.

  “I wasn’t thinking, Kieran. You looked at me and asked how old I was outta the blue. I knew you thought I was young, everyone does. It was a mistimed joke. Nobody hurt me,” she mumbles the last part. I don’t believe that for a second.

  “So you had Jack when you were nineteen?”

  “That would be the correct math.”

  I notice she doesn’t really answer my question, but I don’t push. She’ll tell me when she’s ready.

  “His dad around?”

  She shrugs.

  “Ash’s dad around?”

  She shrugs again.

  “You gotta give me something, Quinn.”

  “They’re mine and I’m alone. That’s all I’ve got to give you,” she says quietly, looking at her hands. “Everything okay with your cousin?” She changes the subject.

  “Yeah. It’s all good. You doin’ okay after everything?” I ask cautiously.

  Her head snaps back up with a curious gleam in her icy blue eyes.

  “Are you okay?” she asks with an edge in her voice. She thinks I’m belittling her.

  “I didn’t want that for you. I got no problem with what me
and the boys did. I’d do it again in a heartbeat. But I’m fuckin’ strugglin’ with you,” I grumble.

  “I’ve been takin’ care of myself a long time. Don’t worry about me,” she says dismissively, which pisses me the fuck off quick.

  “Don’t. Do. That,” I order grasping her chin, roughly forcing her to meet my gaze.

  “Take care of myself?” she grinds out sarcastically.

  “You know what I fuckin’ meant. Don’t dismiss me. I’m standin’ here tellin’ you the truth. I expect the same in return.” Her face goes soft and I release her chin. She keeps her head angled up at me. I’m more than a foot taller than her so she has to look up a long way to meet my eyes.

  “I always puke afterward. It doesn’t mean anything. I don’t feel bad for what I did to him. That’s a first for me. I wish I could shut off the emotion and act like nothing happens but I can’t. But last night is not bothering me. AT ALL. Thank you for what you did. Thank you for lettin’ me do what I did. Thank you for holdin’ me all night with my kids. It’s the safest I’ve felt in eight years.” She gasps and throws her hand over her mouth at the last sentence. Guess she didn’t mean to say that.

  “I’m sorry I was rough with you last night. I was hangin’ on by a fuckin’ thread. I needed his blood off you. I needed you in my arms with your kids. I don’t know how to explain this other than to say I need to protect you more than I’ve ever needed anything in my life. Is that okay? Please tell me that’s okay, Quinn.”

  “It’s okay,” she whispers and offers me a small smile. I grin back.

  “The basement’s finished, just one big room with a TV and a few recliners. We can put toys and shit at the other end and make it a playroom for the kids. Let’s get movin’ so we can get back to Jack,” I say lightly.

  “You don’t have to get us anything or change your house. We’ll only be here a few days. We can all sleep together in your guest room. We’ll be fine in there. I just need a little while to line a few things up.”

  “Fight one done and now on to fight two. You’re not just stayin’ here a few days. Those kids deserve a house, warm meals and beds. I’m not lettin’ you take ’em out in the streets again. You told me you’ve got demons out there and that means the kids aren’t safe. Sorry, Shorty, but I’m not sendin’ you off on your own,” I growl.